USSR Hoax

16 GENEVA, SWITZERLAND

The flashbulbs going off in a staccato effect blinded Tom as he shook Viktor Alexandrov’s hand. Tom struggled with the fact he was cozying up with the enemy while American families were building bunkers back home out of fear the Soviets would drop an atomic bomb at any moment. He forced a smile as he held the pose for the cameras. An American astronaut publicly shaking the hand of a Soviet cosmonaut was big news, especially as the Cold War escalated and the two countries fought for space supremacy.

Despite having sat next to Viktor while answering questions for the media about a possible joint mission between the two countries, Tom still hadn’t been able to speak directly to the cosmonaut. Ever since entering the hotel conference room, there seemed to be two separate camps. The Americans, all in coats and ties, were on one side. The Soviets, mostly dressed in military uniforms, were on the other.

Tom had been hesitant about approaching Viktor due to the Soviet men in uniforms constantly surrounding him. Tom had no idea if these men were aware of the secret transfer that was to take place, especially since none of the Americans in the room knew. He decided to play it safe and wait for Viktor to make the first move. With the meeting coming to an end, Tom needed to get a coded statement from Viktor validating he was a part of the operation before Tom could turn over the lunar material. He had his own coded message he was to reply with.

While the cameramen continued to take pictures, an American diplomat stepped in front of all, waving his arms as he spoke over the loud clicking sounds. “That’s it, gentlemen, thank you for coming.”

As the bright flashes subsided, Tom let go of Viktor’s hand. Soon the press were gathering up their belongings and heading toward the exit.

While the commotion unfolded in front of them, Viktor leaned over and whispered, “My boy vant go Disneyland for see Mickey Moose.”

Tom swallowed hard. Even with the heavy Russian accent, Tom recognized the confirming code. He was surprised the cosmonaut had gone straight to the code message without any small talk. Tom assumed it was because Viktor was free of the men escorting him. Tom cleared his throat before countering with his own scripted reply. “Your son can even meet Donald Duck and Goofy.”

Viktor smiled. For the first time, Tom got a good look at the man’s face and detected nothing sinister about the cosmonaut. Instead, Tom saw a happy and joyful expression. Tom glanced over at the other Soviet men standing close together in the corner of the room, intently eyeing Viktor. Tom was instructed to pass over the lunar material directly to Viktor in the privacy of his room. He figured this was as good a time as any to attempt the transaction. Leaning toward the cosmonaut, Tom asked, “Would you like to get out of here and have a drink?”

Viktor nodded. “Dah.”

“Can you go alone?”

“Dah, but please vait.” Viktor turned and walked over to his keepers. After a brief conversation, Viktor returned, straightening his tie. “Time to vodka.”

Tom smiled at the Russian’s English. He called out to one of the U.S. diplomats. “Freddy, I’m going to have a drink with Viktor.”

The man gave an acknowledging wave.

As the two men left, Tom decided it was best to skip the drink and go straight to his room to pass over the canister. He turned to Viktor. “I need to get something out of my room, if that’s okay. It’s on the first floor.”

Viktor nodded as if knowing the reason. “Dah.”

The two men walked in awkward silence down the long, dimly lit hallway, making Tom uncomfortable. His mind started racing, wondering if Viktor actually was a Soviet cosmonaut. For all Tom knew, the man could be an undercover KGB agent. Tom was well known throughout the space industry for his spacewalk. But there was no public record confirming that Viktor was a cosmonaut, let alone, having ever flown in space. With the Soviets being so secretive, Viktor could hold any title within the USSR.

What if this guy has a gun? Tom was starting to get nervous as they approached his room. He needed to protect himself. But how? Tom looked over at Viktor, who flashed a conspiratorial grin. Tom faced forward and reached into his pocket for his room key. Hey, I’ve seen spy movies. I can figure this out.

Tom opened the door and motioned for Viktor to enter. Tom followed the balding man, closing the door behind them. For a couple of beats both men just stared at each other, neither moving or saying a word.

Viktor broke the silence. “Nyet vodka this room?”

Neither had mentioned anything about the lunar material, and Tom felt funny just blurting it out. “Sorry, I don’t have any alcohol in here. But I do have a package for you.”

“Dah, vhy I here.” Viktor started scoping out the place, as if looking for the canister.

“Viktor, I’m sorry, but I need to pat you down.”

The cosmonaut reacted with surprise, “You spect me KGB?”

Tom didn’t know what he thought, but felt it was the appropriate protocol. He decided to blame his agency. “NASA instructed me to frisk you before handing over the package.”

Viktor casually moved a few steps closer and raised both arms. “Dah.”

In the movies, the detective always frisked the suspect from behind. So, awkwardly, Tom walked around Viktor and, starting just under the Russian’s raised arms, he began patting along the sides of Viktor’s body, not sure what he was looking for. He worked his way down. Reaching the bottom of Viktor’s coat, Tom felt a lump.

“Zat eye glasses.”

Tom reached into the pocket and pulled out a small leather case. He thought it was odd a cosmonaut needed reading glasses. All NASA astronauts had to have 20/20 vision or better to fly. He established it was only glasses before returning the case. After finishing the pat down, Tom motioned toward a small table. “Please have a seat over there.”

Viktor nodded and walked across the carpeted room. Tom headed straight for the closet, reaching behind some clothes for the small briefcase that held the canister. As he approached the table holding the case, Viktor gave a nod, indicating he suspected what was in it.

Tom had been given no instructions on how to pass over the lunar material. Do I just say ‘here you go’? He set the case by his chair and sat down, placing his arms on the table.

Viktor seemed to sense Tom’s uneasiness. The cosmonaut looked around the room. “Nyet vodka?”

It was obvious Viktor liked to drink. Tom again conveyed he didn’t have any by shaking his head no.

Viktor leaned back in his chair. “Umm, is…” The cosmonaut seemed to be struggling on how to say something as he motioned with his hands. “Umm, is you have child?”

Tom settled into the chair and leaned forward. He understood that Viktor was inquiring if he had any children. “I do, a four-year-old boy.”

Viktor’s eyes lit up. “I too, Dmitri. He five. He a little devil.”

Tom smiled. He was starting to relax. “My son’s name is Peter. He has been a good boy so far, but I’m sure he’ll be a handful down the road.”

“Vant more child?”

Tom rubbed his lip. “Maybe someday.”

“I vish a girl. My vife, Maria, she pretty. I know girl pretty.”

Tom was feeling more comfortable with Viktor. He wasn’t acting like some crazy Communist who wanted America destroyed. The short man was becoming more human to Tom, erasing any preconceived notions he had of Russians.

“Maybe our boys meet someday, play.”

Tom seriously doubted that would ever happen, even if the joint mission actually took place. He just smiled at the cosmonaut.

“Spacevalk good?”

Tom sat back, impressed Viktor was inquiring about his Gemini flight. “Like any space mission, there were problems. But it was wonderful. I can’t wait to go back.”

“Maybe you go to moon?”

“Maybe. How about you? Have you been up yet?

“Nyet. I at bottom, but happy I here. I hope fly zis mission. Maybe ve share vodka in space?”

For the cosmonaut’s sake, Tom hoped the joint mission happened, even though Tom doubted he’d be a part of it. “That would be nice.”

Viktor took the pair of thick, black-rimmed glasses out of the case and slipped them on. He said in a more serious tone, “Vhere moon rocks?”

Tom assumed the small talk was over and nodded. He reached down and picked up the briefcase. He gently set the case on the table and slid it over.

Viktor adjusted his glasses slightly and looked at Tom. “Vat code?”

Tom had thought the Soviet was just going to take the case and leave. Tom rambled off the numbers from memory. “9, 2, 9, 6, 1.”

Tom heard soft clicks as Viktor turned the small dials. A sudden loud snap signaled his co-conspirator had entered the numbers correctly.

Viktor lifted open the cover, blocking Tom’s view. After hearing movement within the case, Viktor’s hand reappeared over the top before closing the case. Viktor had a big grin on his face as he removed his glasses. “Zis good. I take to room. Then ve go have vodka.”