Wildest Dreams

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Meddling

One week later…

I had a problem.

We were at Frey’s lodge in Kellshorn or, more accurately, outside the large mountain town that catered to vacationing skiers and fishermen who came to fish at the vast lake that Frey’s lodge and the town skirted.

My girls hadn’t been exactly right. The lodge wasn’t fit for a queen as it was no Winter Palace and definitely no Rimée Keep.

But that didn’t mean it wasn’t cool-as-shit.

First of all, it skirted a vast lake and that would be a spectacular vast lake.

Secondly, the lodge was gorgeous. It was made of blond wood and stone, it had a lower level built into the swell of a hill and two upper levels that had wraparound balconies, the lower one wider, all of them with wooden railings made of flat planks that had been stamped through along their lengths with the shape of a pine tree.

Nothing inside or outside of the lodge was graceful, refined or ornate as with the Palace and the Keep. This was not a place for stately affairs or official meetings. This was a place to relax, unwind and be surrounded by nature in all its immense beauty. It was comfy, cozy, welcoming and warm. There were lots of windows, lots of open spaces, lots of beautiful, gleaming wood, lots of gorgeous stone, lots of furniture that invited you to sink into it and lots of fires that seemed to keep every corner warm.

There were also lots of bedrooms which was lucky because all four of my girls came with me.

This meant the journey included sleighs which made that journey longer (two days rather than the one Frey told me it would have been if we were able to take the more direct route). As we travelled, Frey’s men rode around the two sleighs packed with his, my and the girls’ trunks and, for the first time since I arrived in that world, I rode in a sleigh with Esther and Bess (the first day) and Jocelyn and Alyssa (the second) because Frey didn’t want me on Caspia.

This was my problem.

I was pregnant and Frey, as early signs were indicating, was going to be one of those ultra-careful, concerned, not exactly hovering but nevertheless protective expectant fathers.

Case in point, Frey had put his foot down that, considering my condition, I would not be continuing my lessons on Caspia and he’d also called a halt to knife work with Lund.

I gave in on quitting working with Gun and Caspia. Frey was ecstatic I was pregnant and it had to be said (after the initial shock) that I was ecstatic too therefore it would not do for me to take a fall off Caspia and harm myself or our child.

And, incidentally, when we told Aurora and Atticus, they were both (even Aurora) beside themselves with glee.

In other words, all was well in my world and we didn’t need me to do anything stupid to change that.

But the knife work wasn’t dangerous. Lund knew what he was doing, he never got close to hurting me and we’d been working together for so long, I knew he wouldn’t.

And anyway, all that running around, lunging, twirling and squatting would be a good way to keep fit while pregnant.

Frey, however, did not see it this way and also thought I was a little crazy for wishing to keep fit during my pregnancy, stating, “Part of the beauty of a woman with child is her curves, wife, and you’ll not deprive me of the ones I bestowed on you by ‘keeping fit’.”

Yes, this was what he said.

Further, Frey had allowed me to continue with my bow and arrow but only target practice, not “skulking” (his word) through the woods aiming at human beings.

We’d argued about all of this, our first argument in so long, I didn’t remember when we had our last.

I was pregnant, not invalid and this I shared with my husband.

I was not going to be on a horse, working with knives or skulking through cold woods and this my husband shared with me.

My problem was, to practice with Lund and skulk with Annar, I needed his men and they listened to Frey and not me.

Therefore, Skylar continued his work with Frey’s men and I did not (except the bow and arrow but seriously, it was fun skulking through the woods and it was a lot less fun standing there and shooting at a stationary target).

This pissed me off and, as I nursed my snit, it came to me that if Frey was going to be this cautious with me while I was expecting, then there was no way he was going to let me find a witch, send a message to Valentine, communicate with her what was happening and that I had to go home, talk to Sjofn, sort out my life back home, say good-bye to friends and come back.

No way.

And I had to do this. My return journey was scheduled to happen in less than six months time. I was guessing I was maybe a month pregnant, perhaps a bit more. That would mean I’d be in my third trimester and no way Frey would let me journey back then and I wasn’t keen to do it then either. But if I didn’t get a message to Valentine, he wouldn’t have a choice and nor would I.

So my husband and I needed to have a discussion.

But I was avoiding that discussion because although my anger had cooled to worry, Frey’s had disappeared completely. He was back to my sweet, gentle Frey and held no grudges (then again, he didn’t need to since he got his way). But when we were fighting, I found it upset me (tremendously) when he was angry. We got along so well, fighting with him was no fun, it didn’t feel good at all in so far as it didn’t even feel right and I wasn’t all fired up to get in another argument with him then or, ever, really.

So I needed to find a way to discuss this with my husband without either of us getting upset and with Frey agreeing to let me go home.

Something I thought would be impossible.

I was thinking of all this as I was wandering along the upper balcony, taking in the lake, the sea of pine trees rising up all around, the snow-capped mountains rising behind the trees, the pretty village of Kellshorn some ways away and all of this reflected in the calm, clear waters of the lake. And I was doing this hoping for those calm waters to calm me when I saw Bess, Alyssa and Esther at the end of the balcony looking down and whispering to each other.

As I approached, Bess heard me, turned, put her finger to her lips and then she lifted her hand and waved it toward herself urgently, her face smiling.

I smiled back and moved toward them, glad to have something to take me away from my thoughts. When I arrived at their huddle, I got close to Bess on the end and looked over the railing to see what held their attention. I scanned the somewhat cleared area around the house, saw nothing then I caught it.

Thad had Jocelyn pinned against the side of the stable, her arms were around his shoulders, his hands were at her ass and they were going at it, hot and heavy.

Whoa.

When did this happen?

“When did this happen?” I whispered to Bess.

“He took her last night,” Bess whispered back. “Her room’s next to mine. They were noisy.” After she imparted this information, she giggled and tried (unsuccessfully) to stifle it as I heard Alyssa giggle and unsuccessfully try to stifle hers too.

“I heard it as well so I went to Bess’s room to listen,” Alyssa whispered like Jocelyn and Thad were five feet away rather than yards away and my eyes went around them to look at Esther at the other end who was looking at me and rolling her eyes. As for me, I couldn’t help it, I was smiling. “He has stamina too,” Alyssa finished and my smile got bigger.

“Lots of it,” Bess added on a huge grin.

I turned my smile on them both before I teased, “You two need to get yourselves some so you won’t be up in Jocelyn’s business.”

Alyssa’s eyes wandered to where Max and Stephan were standing chatting to each other some ways away from the goings on with Thad and Jocelyn and she said wistfully, “You’re indeed right about that, Finnie.”

“So right,” Bess added, also wistfully, her eyes had wandered to where Orion was dismounting from his horse close to the lake.

I looked around them again to Esther who was not looking at me, Bess, Alyssa or any of Frey’s hot guys but at Thad and Jocelyn and I saw her face was thoughtful.

My head tilted to the side before I looked back at the couple only to see Thad had Jocelyn by the hand and he was leading her into the stables.

“Someone’s going to get their skirts tossed up in the hayloft,” Alyssa muttered then giggled again.

Bess giggled with her then stated, eyes still on Orion, “My turn next,” and she moved away from the balcony with a quick wave, a big smile and a, “Farewell, ladies.”

Hmm. It seemed Orion was about to get lucky.

“Not a bad idea,” Alyssa murmured, gave me a wicked grin and both Esther and I a wave as she also moved away, saying to me, “Please don’t need anything for, say… a few hours,” her wicked grin got more wicked when I nodded to her request then she sashayed down the balcony and disappeared inside.

Now Max or Stephan was going to get lucky.

Or whichever of Frey’s men Alyssa ran into first for I didn’t think Alyssa was all that picky. Then again, all of Frey’s guys were hot and nice.

I grinned to myself even as I wondered if this was all a good idea, for Frey’s men were Frey’s men, my girls were my girls, it was likely this would always be the way and we didn’t need a soap opera unfolding around us. I moved to Esther who, I was thinking as she still looked deep in thought and her eyes were still directed at the stables, agreed.

“You okay?” I asked when we were close, she started, her eyes came to me and I watched her force a smile.

“I am fine, Finnie,” she answered.

“You don’t look fine,” I observed, her fake smile faltered and her eyes slid back to the stables so I got closer and enquired gently, “Is this going to be bad, you girls having dalliances with Frey’s men?”

Esther’s eyes came quickly to me, her brows drawn then her face relaxed and she shook her head. “No. It is usually fun and games, the heart isn’t involved. Dalliances occur often and those involved move on with no ill-will, even to friends of the men or women involved.” She explained this but hesitated, her eyes drifting back to the stables and she muttered, “But…” and then she trailed off.

“But what?” I prompted and she looked back at me.

Then she got closer and took my hand before saying softly, “But our Jocelyn, she admires The Drakkar’s Thad and not just because he is a tall, hearty lad with broad shoulders and pleasing eyes. But because he has a quick wit, an easy smile and, she’s noted on more than one occasion, a soft heart. And I fear,” her eyes went back to the stables, “hers is involved but his,” her eyes came back to me, “is not.”

I bit my lip for this might be true. While we were in Hawkvale, I wrote to my girls and they wrote to me. Mail took for freaking ever to get where it was going so there wasn’t a lot of communication but we’d managed to exchange a few letters and Jocelyn’s contributions asked after Thad. Her tone was casual but a forced casual that I thought, at the time, was kind of cute.

Now, thinking about it, all the time my girls had been amongst Frey’s boys and they switched favorites nearly daily, Jocelyn’s attention had always been taken by Thad and never strayed. Thad, on the other hand, I knew, unlike Ruben, did not have a steady woman and, indeed, like all of Frey’s other men, had a steady stream of women.

Ho boy.

I let my lip go and squeezed Esther’s hand, promising, “I’ll have a word with Frey and see if he’ll have a word with Thad to, um… assess the situation. If he won’t or if he will and the news is not good, then I’ll have a word with Jocelyn just to see where she is and give her a little, um… guidance.”

Esther’s eyes went soft and she nodded, “This would be good, my princess.” I nodded back, she squeezed my hand, her eyes going intense, she paused as if uncertain and I waited until she said quietly, “We all, well…” she hesitated. “We miss Sjofn.”

We hadn’t talked of it but all my girls knew I was expecting (though they were surprised I was for they said the powder was usually very reliable) and all of them knew what that meant which was the fact that their friend wasn’t coming back. And I knew all of them were sad about this but I also knew they were all trying to hide it from me.

I held her hand tight and whispered, “I know, honey.”

“But, we’re all also glad you are so sweet.”

I smiled at her and, still whispering, said, “Thank you, Esther. That means a lot.”

She returned my smile before her eyes wandered back to the landscape, stopped on something and she muttered, “I best move, I don’t want to left out,” then she squeezed my hand again, let it go and hurried away.

I watched her a second then looked out to see Oleg striding toward the house while scowling at an Orion who was now smiling down at Bess then he swung his scowl to Max and Stephan who both appeared to be flirting with Alyssa and I had to admit, I was a little surprised at Esther’s choice. Oleg wasn’t hard on the eyes but he also wasn’t easygoing and quick to laugh or smile like all of Frey’s other men. In fact, he so wasn’t any of these, he seemed grumpy a lot of the time.

I waited then watched Esther approach him and then watched him stop and scowl at her, something which I thought was kind of scary but didn’t affect her in the slightest. She said something to him, his brows shot together then he jerked up his chin then jerked his whole head to the house. She turned toward it, he followed her and I wondered what she’d said to him. As she moved, her eyes came up to me and she smiled.

I smiled back.

Oleg, if her smile was anything to go by and he could quit being grumpy long enough to catch a pass, was about to get lucky too.

I left the balcony and in so doing left my girls to it and headed to Frey and my bedroom to get my book and Penelope.

Instead of thinking about how I was going to get my husband to agree to let me return home for a little while to say good-bye to my old life, I wanted to lose myself in a book while reclining on one of the comfortable, wooden lounge chairs on the deck. These had a big, iron fire pit next to them that put off so much heat, what with that and the summer thaw Frey told me about that was warming the air, making the days longer and the snow melt and the icicles drip, you didn’t have to wear a cloak. I knew this because I’d tested it last night, cuddling with Frey in one of those chairs with a big fire blazing beside us and making out until Frey was done making out and carried me to our bedroom to do a lot more than make out. But considering the activities of my girls and Frey’s men, and the fact that he only had a housekeeper at his lodge, no other servants, and further he likely wouldn’t be fired up about me building my own fire considering he thought pregnancy required severely limited physical activity (as in, none at all except to walk, sit, eat and have sex), I decided I’d curl up by the fire in the living room. There were super-soft, comfy couches in there, so comfy, they were a very good second best.

Or, at least they would be until Frey returned from whatever he was doing and I could ask him to build me a fire.

I entered our bedroom through the wooden doors that led to the balcony, closed them behind me and started to the nightstand on my side of the bed where my book was when the hairs at the back of my neck stood up.

I stopped, my breath stopped and I turned slowly then stopped again, going completely still at what I saw.

In the armchair in the corner by the windows sat Valentine wearing a fabulous, jade green, wool knit, wraparound dress, equally fabulous, spike-heeled, charcoal gray boots and her tremendously fabulous red hair was framing the classic features of her alabaster face.

Penelope was curled in her lap purring as Valentine’s blood-red fingernails moved through her thick, ginger fur.

Holy moly.

“Valentine?” I whispered.

“Hello, my goddess of love,” she replied quietly, my eyes got big and I felt a smile hit my face as I rushed to her.

“Valentine! It is so cool you’re here!” I cried, her head tipped to the side, her lips tipped up slightly and her eyes flashed in a way that made my excitement at what I thought was a very surprising but also very fortunate turn of events fade to hesitant concern.

Then she solidified that concern when she said softly, “I fear, my Seoafin, after I say what I’ve come to say, you will not feel this same way.”

I felt my heart squeeze and a million thoughts raced through my head, primarily Sjofn wanting to come back and wanting to do that early.

Okay. Shit. First things first.

I needed to go get Frey.

“Please sit,” Valentine invited, regardless that it was actually my bedroom, and she did this by gracefully throwing out her pale hand to indicate the bed.

“I…” I started, didn’t know how to go on then I went on anyway. “A lot has happened Valentine, you can’t imagine. A lot. Huge. I need to go get someone so you can meet him and then we need to talk.”

“Please, Seoafin, sit,” she semi-repeated and I blinked at her.

“Seriously, I have to –” I started but she interrupted me.

“Tell me you are married to Frey Drakkar and you are pregnant with his child. This, ma cherie, I know,” she stated, I sucked in a surprised breath and she went on. “Now, please, considering you are, indeed, expecting, I would very much prefer it if you were seated when I say what I’ve come to say.”

I stared at her thinking this did not sound good.

Then I moved to the bed and sat.

What I wanted to do, watching her face, was move to the door and run.

Penelope, shockingly, didn’t leave Valentine’s lap but stayed purring right where she was and while doing it didn’t even twitch.

My cat, by the way, was still holding her grudge.

Once I was down, I unhooked my light wool cloak, pulled it off my shoulders and it fell to the bed as I kept my eyes on her.

Then I asked, “How do you know about Frey and me?”

She tilted her head slightly before answering, “I told you I am not a seer and this is true, I am not. I do not have visions and I cannot call up scenes from the future. This does not mean I cannot tune into people of our world, or this one, and see what has past. And this I have been doing with you since you left.”

“You’ve been keeping an eye on me?” I asked, not upset about this, exactly, just surprised.

“It was not by choice. You call to me, Seoafin, I do not know why. But you do. So, yes, since you do, I have been keeping an eye on you.”

It was interesting, this “calling to her” business, but I decided for now that we needed to keep on target.

“So you know when I got here that I –” I started.

“I know everything,” she interrupted me, took in a delicate breath, her eyes narrowing slightly on me and then she went on, speaking softly but even so, the words she spoke rocked my world.

“I know that your emotion runs deep for your husband and his for you. However, I feel it is important that you know all so the happiness you are experiencing will be true and rich rather than shadowed by misunderstanding. So, I’ve been watching and waiting for your husband to clear those shadows. Alas, he has not so, unusually, I feel compelled to do so.”

I didn’t have anything to say to that and since I was concentrating on keeping my tightening neck muscles from snapping, I didn’t make a peep.

Valentine carried on. “Therefore, I must inform you that I also know that before you felt this emotion for him, and he was aware of his depth of feeling for you, in order to bind you to this land and to him for the future of this country and for his own ends as he held extreme distaste for your twin, he ordered the elves of this world to bind you here for the rest of your days at the same time he ordered that the other Sjofn be bound to your world… and your life… for the rest of hers.”

I blinked but said nothing mostly because I had no air in my lungs and my throat suddenly felt parched.

Valentine kept speaking. “The power held by these creatures is immense, unbreakable. It is so powerful I have never felt the like of it. Still, I have searched for magic or some means of thwarting it but my search was fruitless and I fear this kind of magic does not exist.” She paused, held my gaze and delivered the killing blow, “You are never to go home, Seoafin, ever. And your twin will never come back, ever.”

I stared at her, now unblinking, she held my stare and continued.

“Your husband made this decision without consulting you and he did this on the night you first learned of the existence of elves.”

I kept staring as my mind reeled.

That night… that night…

Oh my God. We barely knew each other back then. He’d just come back from being away with his men. Although he told me he fell in love with me while I was mixing pancake batter, and maybe when he looked back this was the true, but at the time he didn’t trust me and I wasn’t even certain he liked me. He didn’t even know who I was until the elves told him. In fact, he wouldn’t start being really sweet and gentle, becoming my Frey, until after that night.

After he’d cut me off from my world – completely and forever.

And he cut me off because the elves had told him who I was. He cut me off because Sjofn was a lesbian and I was not. He cut me off because he could get from me for the rest of his life what he wouldn’t get from her.

And he did all of this without asking me.

He irrevocably changed my life and imprisoned me in this world, cutting me off from people I loved and the world I knew without asking and at a time when I had no intention of staying.

Oh… my… God.

“And when,” Valentine continued and my dazed, wounded attention shot back to her, “I sent a message through the witch of this world, Agnes, to inform you this happened, your husband intercepted it, lied to me through Agnes about your desires to remain, saying you were aware of this situation and had agreed to stay. He then disallowed Agnes any communication with you even though much was happening in this world and your own.”

Oh my God.

“And now, ma cherie,” she kept going, her voice gentling, indicating she was not done delivering her death blows, “even though I do sense you are pleased that you are bound to this world and further bound to it through the child you carry, you must know that your husband orchestrated that as well. He did this without your knowledge and, until it came about and you decided to be pleased mostly because the deed was done and you had no choice, he also did it against your will.”

It was then I finally blinked again.

Then I whispered, “What?”

“This powder you took?” she asked, I nodded slowly and she went on. “It is quite powerful and nearly foolproof. However, you have not been taking it now for some time. He discovered it and switched it with a placebo with the intent to sire a child on you in order to safely deliver an heir to the throne of this nation.”

I felt every inch of my body lock.

No.

God. No.

Why would he do that?

“Why would he do that?” I breathed.

“He is a man,” Valentine answered gently, studied my face that I could actually feel was pale and then she continued. “Therefore, my goddess of love, your husband has been very busy. Your parents of this world have known of all of this since your return to them after the time you spent in the country. The three of them have known you are bound to this world everlasting and Princess Sjofn would never return. But it is only your husband, and one of his men who procured the placebo for you, that knows he has schemed behind your back to get you with child.”

I couldn’t believe this.

This was unbelievable.

Why would Frey do this? Any of it.

Why?

Memories clashed in my head. Atticus seeming so despondent when I couldn’t hit the target I knew now was not because he was disappointed in his Sjofn but because he was mourning the loss of his daughter. Both his and Aurora’s easy acceptance of me, acceptance they had no choice but to have for their Frey, their Drakkar had commanded the elves. All of them, including Frey’s quick and unreserved happiness I was pregnant without me having to say a word about remaining in this world, switching places with Sjofn and providing an heir to the throne.

God, I was so stupid, so blind, so involved in falling in love I didn’t even notice, didn’t think, didn’t piece it together – but this was because they all knew I was never leaving way before I did and way before I even knew I wanted to.

I felt my jaw clench and a red film descended over my eyes.

“That said…” Valentine’s voice came to me but I had stopped hearing her, nothing was penetrating the injured, infuriated fog filling my head.

I slowly stood and turned to round the bed.

“Seoafin,” she called but I ignored her and moved, my gait slow, my head feeling fuzzy, my eyes still seeing red.

“Seoafin,” I heard again and then I heard an angry mew from Penelope which could only mean that Valentine had stood but I kept going, my pace quickening. “Seoafin, my goddess of love, I’m not quite –”

But she didn’t finish because I was running to the door, out the door, down the hall, down the stairs, down the next flight, out the door and into the snow.

And as I blindly ran, I ran right into Ruben who caught me in his arms.

“Finnie, what are you doing outside without a cloak?” he asked and my head shot back, my gaze locked with his and his head jerked at what he saw.

“Where’s Frey?” I demanded to know.

“Finnie –” Ruben started, his eyes turning guarded as they took in my face, his hands coming to my upper arms, fingers curling around carefully.

“Ben, where… is… Frey?” I ended my question on a shriek and Ruben’s head jerked again as his fingers tightened.

Then he said gently, “Go inside, my princess, I’ll get him.”

“Fuck that,” I snapped, yanking free of his hold and ignoring his wince at my words. “Tell me where he is.”

“Fin –” he started, something caught his attention, he looked beyond me, his big body went tight and his eyes narrowed.

“Ben!” I yelled and his eyes snapped back to me. “Where the fuck is Frey?”

“Right here, wee one, what on earth is amiss?” I heard Frey ask and the minute I heard his voice, I turned on him.

Then I took him in as he moved toward me, his boots crunching in the snow and my heart squeezed, hard and tight, staying frozen like it was never going to pump again.

My beautiful husband. My sweet and gentle Frey. The man I loved. The man whose child I was carrying. The man who had lied to me and irrevocably changed the course of my life… twice… without bothering to discuss it with me.

“Frey, there’s a wo –” Ruben started to say in a low tone but I cut him off.

“You unbelievable asshole!” I shrieked, Frey’s brows shot together over narrowed eyes as he stopped walking about four feet from me and his body went still.

“Finnie, what –?” he started.

“Fuck you!” I spat, leaning forward to do it. “Fuck you, Frey! I cannot fucking believe you!”

“Frey –” Ruben said quietly, Frey’s eyes unlocked with mine, he looked around me, he focused on something in the distance, I saw his face go hard but I ignored all of this and kept at it.

“You told the elves to bind me to this world,” I accused hotly and his eyes shot back to my face. “You did it a long time ago. You did it without asking me. You did it before you even knew you liked me much less loved me. And you did it so you wouldn’t have to be bound to Sjofn for the rest of your days. You did it for completely selfish reasons. You did it without once thinking of me. You did it only thinking of you.” I watched as he flinched, I knew that proved Valentine’s words true and my heart started pumping so fast, in an instant my blood felt like it was going to boil through my skin and it pushed me to keep right on going. “Who could do that and how?” I shouted. “How?” I screamed. “How could you do that?” I shrieked, arms straight down at my sides, hands in fists, torso leaning toward him.

“Finnie, love, let’s go inside,” he said gently, moving to me, hand coming toward me but I took two quick steps back and lifted my hand, palm out to him and he stopped but only at my next words.

“Don’t you dare touch me, Frey, don’t you fucking touch me because that was just the worst of it but not all of it. I know… I fucking know you switched my powders without talking to me about that either.”

I heard Ruben pull in a breath but it was Frey’s face that had my attention because it changed, his eyes flashed and his voice got low when he ordered, “Finnie, we’re going inside.”

“Fuck that and fuck you!” I leaned forward to screech. “Who does that? Who does any of this shit?” I yelled, throwing my hands out. “It’s my body, Frey! I get to decide or at the very least we talk about when we create a baby but oh no…” I drew this out sarcastically, shaking my head and taking another step back. “Not The Drakkar. Not The Frey. My life isn’t mine. My body isn’t mine. Both are clearly yours to do with whatever you wish without once consulting me.”

“Wife,” Frey cut in, “you’re distressed and there’s a woman I do not know standing behind you. Let us go inside and –”

“Unh-unh,” I shook my head. “No way. No fucking, fucking way. I’m not going anywhere with you. The only thing I know, because Valentine told me, is that wherever I go has to be here!” I shouted, pointing to the ground realizing belatedly we had an audience of all my girls (save, probably, Jocelyn though I was in no state to check) and a number of Frey’s men but I didn’t care.

Not even a little bit.

And that was why I kept yelling. “I had friends back home, Frey, people I love. And I’ll never see them again not even to say good-bye. I didn’t have family but I had a family of friends and without thinking of me once you swept them all away. You swept my whole world away. How could you do that? How could my sweet, generous husband do that to me?” I ended on a screech, Frey’s face shifted to concern at my rising hysteria, he took two swift steps to me but I scuttled quickly away, hand back up, palm out, rounding Ruben and retreating while still speaking. “Don’t come near me.” I shook my head. “Don’t you dare come near me.” This I whispered as the despair began to overwhelm me. “You’ve… you… I can’t believe I’m not safe with you. I can’t believe I can’t trust you and I can’t believe I now know I never fucking could.”

Frey’s body turned with mine and he followed me as I backed through the snow. “My love –” he started but I shook my head hard.

“I’m not that,” I told him, tears making my voice hoarse as they shone in my eyes. “I’m not that to you. I’m not your love and I never have been. You don’t treat someone you love like this. You don’t. Not ever. Not ever.”

At my words, I watched the expression on his face shift to ravaged and he whispered, “My wee Fin –”

But he didn’t finish the name I loved him to call me.

This was because I heard a whistle fill the air, a whistle I knew very well.

And then I stood still and horrified as I saw Frey’s powerful body wrench forward at the same time I saw the bloody point of an arrow come out his shoulder.

And at this same time I heard Bess, Esther and Alyssa scream and their screams mingled with my own.

And then it happened, everywhere, all around me, all around Frey, all around the men, Valentine and my girls. Whistling arrows flying everywhere, landing in the snow, landing in flesh, men’s grunts of pain, women’s screams, people rushing and horses suddenly galloping through the snow all around, so many of them, it felt like an army had descended on Frey’s lodge.

I stood frozen and watched as, injured, Frey started to race toward me but then I watched in stony shock, horror and with a pain so immense it scored through my insides as two more arrows penetrated my husband’s big, beautiful body and then I watched the powerful Drakkar go down to a knee.

“No!” I shrieked, my body belatedly unlocking, moving to run to him but I didn’t get a step before I was pulled up and planted in front of a man on a horse.

“Get the witch!” I heard my captor order, then he bent into me, drove his heels into his mount’s flanks and we galloped into the surrounding forest.

I struggled, pushing and grunting, my vision filled with nothing but Frey’s powerful body penetrated by three arrows, the blood soaking his wool and down on a knee and my system knew nothing but the driving need to get back to my husband.

“Spell!” my captor shouted, struggling to contain my thrashing. “Now!”

I bucked back at the same time pushing at his arm at my waist, I felt the back of my head collide with his chin, the piercing pain that caused reverberated through my skull, I heard his grunt and I felt a tickle hit my chest.

Then I felt nothing at all because I was asleep.