Within the Flames

Chapter Seventeen

“My dad died when I was ten,” Eddie said, feeling hollow when he said those words. “He was a really good guy, but cancer got him. He was a little older than my mom. I guess, in his late forties, or early fifties. She adored him, but. . a couple years after that, she got lonely. She started going out with some guys from the bank where she worked. And then she met Matthew Swint.”

Lyssa shifted closer, and Eddie wrapped his arm around her, taking comfort in her presence. He couldn’t believe he had told her this much already, but it felt okay. For the first time, safe. He could say the words without his throat locking up. He wanted to say them.

I’m going to spend the rest of my life telling you my secrets, he thought, but instead of being filled with fear or unease, all he felt was relief.

“Matthew was big, like my dad, and a little older. I guess there were some other physical similarities. He was a good mechanic. He owned a garage north of San Francisco. I liked going there at first. He taught me about cars, which. . came in handy later.”

Eddie covered his eyes with his other hand. “He began molesting my sister about three months after my mom started dating him.”

Lyssa sucked in her breath but said nothing. For which he was very grateful.

“She didn’t tell anyone,” he said, his voice finally breaking. “Maybe for the same reason I didn’t tell anyone about the cigarette burns, or the. . the humiliations. I don’t know. We never got a chance to talk about that.”

“Your mother. .” she said.

All he could do was shake his head, as grief knotted his throat. Tears burned, too many to hold in. He shut his eyes and felt them break free, rolling hot down the sides of his face.

Lyssa made a soft sound, and her lips brushed his skin. Kissing away his tears.

It was too much. Too gentle. Too tender. Eddie turned over on his side, away from her — curling into a tight ball as despair shuddered through him. Lyssa immediately pressed against his back, her arms sliding under his, over his chest. Between them, heat, fire. . soothing away the worst of the tremors.

He found her hand, and held it tightly. “She never noticed. I really don’t think she had a clue. She was at work so much, and she. . trusted him.”

“But there must have been signs with the two of you.”

“I don’t know.” Eddie bowed his head even more. “My mom and I have never discussed it.”

Another scar. Another resentment. Unfair, maybe, because he could have pushed the issue and opened up. . but then, so could she. And both he and his mother had always danced around her failure to protect them. And his failure, as well, to protect Daphne.

Lyssa kissed his shoulder. “Did your sister tell you?”

“No. I walked in on. .” He stopped, as memories burned through him, so offensive and terrible that he remembered, too, why he never talked about this.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, feeling ill. “I can’t. .”

“It’s okay,” she whispered.

He dragged down a deep breath. “I loved my sister, but knowing that I knew what was happening. . humiliated her. She couldn’t look me in the eye after that. And I. . promised myself that I wouldn’t let it happen again. But before I could come up with a plan, Matthew. . strangled her to death. I found him and his brother trying to hide her body.”

“Eddie.”

“Something. . snapped inside me. I can’t even tell you. I’ve never. . never felt anything like that. I mean, I always ran hotter than other kids, and sometimes I’d get these fevers. When Matthew would hurt me. . my skin would tingle, pins and needles. I blamed it on the abuse, but now I know differently. It was all just building.

“But right then. .” He shook his head, heart beginning to pound. “The fire broke inside me. And Matthew’s brother, who was standing closest. . he went up in flames.”

Eddie could still hear the man’s screams. He would always hear his screams.

“Matthew couldn’t put his brother out,” he whispered. “He stayed, trying — and that’s what got him arrested. A neighbor heard the screams and called the police. When they arrived, they found my sister’s body and. . other evidence of the murder. At trial, it was revealed that she was pregnant. That’s why he killed her.”

Lyssa was so quiet behind him. Then, softly: “What was her name?”

“Daphne,” he breathed.

“Daphne,” she repeated.

Eddie closed his eyes. “That’s the first time in years I’ve heard anyone say her name.”

She propped herself up on her elbow and slid her hand beneath her cheek. She didn’t try to make him look at her, but he did, anyway. It was difficult. He was afraid of what he’d see in her eyes.

What he found, however, were tears. . and a compassion that was raw and grim, and solely for him.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he whispered.

“Like what?”

“Like I did nothing wrong. If I’d talked. . if I had told my mother, or someone. . if I hadn’t been so afraid of making it worse. .” Eddie choked on those words and dug his palms into his damp eyes. “How could it have been worse? I was so stupid.”

“You were a kid.”

“My father taught me better.”

Lyssa pressed her lips to his cheek. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“My mother taught me not to be a coward. But what have I done? Spent ten years running, tail between my legs.”

“You were just a kid when you lost your family. No could have expected you to start a war.”

Lyssa’s mouth softened. “Yeah?”

He shook his head. “Don’t use logic on me.”

“Logic doesn’t exist, times like these. You react from the gut, then pay for life.” She lay back down again, snug against his side, naked and warm. “So. Based on the way you spoke to your mom on the phone. . that man, Matthew Swint. .”

“Is out of prison.”

“And you’re here with me. Jesus. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. If I had stayed. . I think I might have killed him. It could still happen.”

“You’d be justified.”

His smile felt crooked. “No warnings to be a better man?”

“No.” Lyssa stared him dead in the eyes. “You’re already the best man I know. You can take a dent and still be the best.”

Her words almost killed him. A hot bolt of tenderness and wonderment shot straight through his raw, broken heart.

“But I’m the only man you know,” he said.

Lips quirked. “Don’t get uppity.”

Eddie leaned down and kissed her — gently at first, then deeper, harder, overcome by desire for this woman who could listen to his darkest secrets and just. . take them. He could hardly believe, or trust it. . but when he pulled back just enough to look at her. .

Lannes can go to hell, he thought fiercely. She’s no demon.

Lyssa paled. “What?”

He hesitated, taken aback by the shock in her eyes, “I didn’t say anything.”

But I thought something, he realized.

She struggled to sit up, movements jerky, rushed. He held out his hands. “Hey.”

Her gaze refused to meet his. “We should probably find some clothes.”

Eddie gripped her shoulders. “Can you read my thoughts?”

She tensed and gave him a reluctant look. “Sometimes.”

“Well,” he said, then stopped, staring at her. “Why didn’t you say something?”

“Like what?” Lyssa batted him away with her left hand while keeping her right tucked in a fist against her stomach, a return to her defensive posture. “No one wants to hear that their mind is. . exposed. Besides, it only happened a couple times.”

“A moment ago?”

Her mouth tightened.

“Listen,” Eddie began, but she stiffened, then swung around to stare at the partially open door behind them.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Someone’s coming.”

He pulled away. “Stay here.”

“Like hell,” Lyssa muttered, standing with him and searching for clothes. Not much was still intact, except for his jacket. She slid it on and wrapped the remains of a charred blanket around her hips.

Eddie didn’t bother with clothes at all. He crept to the door, listening as gravel crunched. Light footsteps, careful.

But Lyssa suddenly made a small, pained sound — and ran past him, out the door. Eddie couldn’t catch her in time, and chased her.

Only to find himself staring at Jimmy.

The boy stood at the bottom of the stairs, clutching a flashlight in both hands. Huge eyes, as he stared at Lyssa. When he saw Eddie, his mouth dropped in shock — but that lasted only a moment. He was trembling, his hair stuck to his sweat-soaked forehead. Eddie saw a dark smear on his cheek.

Blood.

Lyssa crouched and grabbed his shoulders. She didn’t seem to notice or care that her right hand was exposed, and Jimmy fell into her arms, hugging her with a choked sob. She sat back on the step, holding him tightly, silent and tense.

“Tell me,” she said. “What happened?”

“They took my mother,” he whispered.

Eddie went back inside to find clothes. His options were limited. He jammed his feet into his boots and found another blanket that he wrapped around his waist. While Lyssa went to dress, he sat with Jimmy on the stone steps.

“Details,” he said.

“We got to the airport,” he whispered, and Eddie heard a whimper beneath the boy’s sweatshirt. “Private plane, like you promised. We drove up, and some men were waiting. They had g-guns, and they sh-shot the man dr-driving us. And my dad.”

Jimmy’s voice choked, and he drew in a shuddering breath. Hands shaking, he fumbled beneath his sweatshirt. He wore a T-shirt underneath, tucked into his jeans, and there was a squirming bulge against his belly.

He pulled his T-shirt free, and Icky tumbled into his lap. Eddie bowed his head, rubbing the back of his neck as the boy hugged the panting dog. Tears streamed down his face.

“Jimmy,” he said, as softly as he could. “What else can you tell me?”

“They put us in a car,” he said haltingly. “And took us across the river out of the city. There was a big house in the middle of trees, and it was quiet.”

Lyssa emerged, dressed in jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. Her left hand was full of a fluttery pale scarf that she wrapped around her neck. On her other hand, a glove — and his jacket.

Jimmy twisted to look at her, and his face crumpled. Lyssa tried to smile for him, but Eddie could see the strain on her face. She sat down beside the boy and wrapped her arm around his shoulders.

“Icky,” she rasped, as the dog whined.

“I hid him,” he whispered, and dug into his pocket for a piece of paper. “I was told to give you this.”

Lyssa hesitated before she took it. “You were telling Eddie about a house?”

“Some ladies were there.” Jimmy stopped, swallowing hard. “They were scary. They separated me from my mom, then c-cut me.”

Eddie watched rage flit across Lyssa’s face, quickly swallowed into a flat mask. “Show me.”

The boy pulled up his sleeve, revealing a thick white bandage wrapped around his forearm.

“They used a black knife.” Jimmy shuddered again, and gave Eddie a desperate look. “Then licked off my blood. It was. . g-gross. They said they’d kill my mom if I didn’t find you.”

“Those women knew you would,” Lyssa said, her eyes glowing faintly in the darkness. “It’s okay, baby. We’re going to get your mom back.”

She pushed off the step, fingering the still-unread note. “Eddie, wait here. I’ll get you some clothes.”

Without another word, she walked into the darkness of the subway tunnel and was swallowed up almost immediately by the endless shadows. He couldn’t even hear her feet on the gravel.

“How did you get here?” Eddie asked.

“Two men drove me back into the city. They’re waiting above.”

“And because those ladies have your mother. . they don’t think you’ll go to the police?”

Jimmy looked scared. “It was the police who drove me.”

Cold sweat broke out over Eddie’s body. “They took orders from the women?”

“Yes.”

“Do they know how to get down here?”

“I don’t think so.”

He stood and stared into the darkness of the subway tunnel. “I need you to be brave again, Jimmy. Can you stay here?”

The boy hugged his dog tighter. “No. I need to help.”

“You are.”

“No,” he said again, more firmly, rubbing tears from his eyes. “I have to be there.”

Eddie stared at him. “How old are you?”

Jimmy straightened. “Twelve.”

Twelve was still a kid. Twelve years old meant he should be nowhere near this kind of danger.

But he was also old enough for heartbreak. Old enough to start living with regret. Making a kid feel helpless was another kind of crime.

“Lyssa’s word is final,” he said. “You know that, right?”

The boy nodded. Eddie walked back inside the workers’ station for his backpack. All he needed was his wallet and cell phone.

“Come on,” he told Jimmy. “Let’s go find her.”

They walked fast across the uneven ground, flashlight beam swinging wildly across the shadows. Squeaks echoed off the walls, and the air smelled like rotting garbage, accompanied by the occasional whiff of feces.

Jimmy gave Eddie a sidelong look. “Are you Lyssa’s boyfriend?”

His heart squeezed. “I hope so.”

“You don’t know?”

“Do I have to go through you first?”

“Maybe. I like her.”

Eddie smiled to himself. “I’ll arm wrestle you for her heart.”

“You’re bigger. That’s cheating.”

“Can you blame me?” He heard voices ahead of them, and saw the reflected flicker of fire against the tunnel walls. “Wait.”

“It’s okay. I know them.” Jimmy began to lurch ahead, but Eddie grabbed the back of the boy’s sweatshirt.

“Wait,” he said again, firmly. “Give me the flashlight, and stay back.”

The boy’s scowl wasn’t quite lost in the beam’s glow, but he lingered in the shadows as Eddie strode across the rough gravel. He listened for Lyssa’s voice, but all he heard were men laughing coarsely, and the hum of a radio.

“Jimmy,” he said, over his shoulder. “What did that note say? The one you gave her?”

The boy hesitated. “No message. Just a piece of fur stapled to the paper.”

“Dammit,” Eddie muttered, and began running — right into a tent city that reminded him of some apocalyptic way station for humanity. When and if the end of the world came, this would be what it looked like: homes made of cardboard and trash, and broken furniture that held up nothing but air. Fires burned in barrels, and a few men were huddled around them.

They stared at Eddie with surprise and wariness as he approached, clutching that blanket around his waist.

“Lyssa,” he said sharply. “Did she pass through here?”

A tall black man blinked heavily at Eddie. “Like a bat out of hell. She mentioned a naked man might come this way. Left money for clothes, but there’s not much to give you.”

Eddie gritted his teeth. “I’d appreciate anything you can spare, sir. I can pay, as well.”

“Hmm,” he said, just as another old man saw Jimmy and bared his teeth in a brutal hiss that sounded like the death throes of a decrepit snake.

“Fucking little thieves,” he muttered, coughing on a snarl. “I’m ready for you and that dog.”

The boy sputtered. Eddie stepped in front of him. “You touch this kid, and I’ll break your arms off.”

“Hey, now,” said the black man, holding up his hands. “No need for bad feelings. Mack, maybe you should go sit down. Take a load off your bad back.”

The old man, whose skin was the color of snow and ash, made a wet grunting noise and gave them all a dirty look. He didn’t leave the circle of heat but looked down at the flames with a stubborn jut of his chin.

Two minutes later, Eddie was forty dollars poorer, and dressed in jeans that were loose in the ass and short in the leg. His red sweatshirt smelled like mildew and concrete and made his skin itch.

“Lyssa said to tell you not to follow,” said the black man, rubbing his knee with a wince. “But that she knew you would, and that she was sorry for trying to get a head start.”

“I bet,” Eddie replied.

“Women,” he added. “They’re killers.”