Wizard

20 Resumption

Robin looked up as Gaby joined her on the porch. She had been sitting on the steps, reading a yellowing manuscript she had found in Cirocco's study. It was a fascinating work, a description of the interactions of flora and fauna and ... the only word for them was undecided organisms, all living within a kilometer of the Melody Shop. It was not a scholarly book but was written in an economical style that Robin found wonderfully readable. The manuscript had been sitting atop a rolltop desk beside a shelf of books containing a dozen volumes authored by C. Jones.

"How are the patients?" Robin asked. Gaby looked haggard. She doubted the woman had slept since the encampment by the river ... how long ago? Two dekarevs? Three? Possibly she had not even slept then.

"Wrong verb," Gaby said, sitting beside her. "How is the patience? Yours."

Robin shrugged. "I'm not in a hurry. I'm broadening my mind. I had no idea the Wizard could write so well."

Gaby batted an imaginary fly in front of her face, looking sour.

"I wish you'd stop calling her the Wizard. It gives her too much to live up to. She's just a human being, like you."

"I know that ... maybe you're right. I'll stop."

"Well, I didn't mean to snap at you." She looked out over the lawn. "The patients are doing as well as can be expected. Chris has stopped screaming, but he's still curled up in the corner. Valiha can't get him to eat. Rocky's locked in her bedroom. All the booze went over the bridge, so far as I know. Of course, with an alcoholic, you are never sure. She could have it hidden anywhere." She put her face in her hands as if to rest for a moment. Robin saw her mouth twist and heard a pitiful sound. Gaby was crying.

"I have her locked up in her room," she managed to say between the hoarse sobs. "I can't believe it. I can't believe it's come to this. When she sees me, she curses. She pukes her guts out and sweats and shivers, and I can't do a thing about it. I can't help her."

Robin was mortified. She had no idea what to do. Sitting beside a woman one respected and watching her consumed with tears was an unthinkable situation. She did not know what to do with her hands. She fingered the pages of the manuscript in her lap, stopped when she realized she was shredding it

With a shock, she remembered crying in front of Hautbois. That had been different, of course. Hautbois had said so, and she had soon realized it was all right. But the Titanide had not just sat there.

Hesitantly, Robin put her arm over Gaby's shoulders. Gaby responded, apparently without shame, turning and burying her face in Robin's shoulder.

"It's all right," Robin said.

"I loved her so much," Gaby moaned. "I still love her. What a joke. After seventy-five years, I still love her."

Gaby lifted Cirocco's head from the pillow and held a glass to her lips.

"Drink this. It's good for you."

"What is it?"

"Pure, fresh water. The best thing in the world."

Cirocco's lips were pale in a moist gray face. Gaby could feel the dampness in the tangled hair as she held Cirocco's head steady with one hand in back. There was a lump there, picked up when she cracked it against the brass bar at the head of the bed.

She sipped, then began to drink noisily.

"Hey, hey, not too much at once. You haven't kept much down lately."

"But I'm thirsty, Gaby," Cirocco whined. "Listen, babe, I won't yell at you anymore. I'm sorry I did." Her voice took on a wheedling tone. "But listen, honey, I'd do just about anything for a drink. Just for old times' sake-"

Gaby clapped her hands to Cirocco's cheeks and pressed them together, making her lips pout in a way that would have been comical in other circumstances. Cirocco cringed back, her eyes red and frightened. She far outweighed Gaby but seemed to have no thought of struggling. All the fight had gone out of her.

"No," Gaby said. "No today, and no tomorrow. I didn't know if I could keep on saying no, so I destroyed all the liquor in the house, so don't even bother to ask me anymore, okay?"

Tears were leaking from the corners of Cirocco's eyes, but Gaby, looking closely, was sickened to see a hint of craftiness there. So there was a cache, something put by for an emergency. At least it wasn't in this room. The door must be kept locked.

"Okay. I am feeling better. I'll be up and around soon, and I'm through with drinking. You'll see."

"Yeah." Gaby looked away, then forced herself back. "I didn't come up here for promises. Not that kind. I wanted to know if you're still with us. With me."

"With... oh, you mean ... what we talked about." She looked quickly around the room, as if to surprise concealed listeners. She shivered and seemed to want to sit up. Gaby helped her. Cirocco pulled the blankets tightly around herself The fireplace roared and crackled and kept the room heated to around thirty-five sweltering degrees, but Cirocco could not get warm.

"I've ... I've been thinking about it," Cirocco said, and Gaby was sure she was lying. She had been thinking of getting a drink. It didn't matter. Her fears would now speak directly, uncensored by any scheme.

"I was thinking maybe we ... maybe we should, should think about it some more. I mean, let's don't rush into it. It's a big step to take. I'll ... sure, I'll still go with you, but we shouldn't... really shouldn't go all the way through with it, you know? Shouldn't really talk to, to Rhea and Crius and-"

"Twenty years isn't exactly rushing it," Gaby pointed out.

"Well, yeah, sure, but what I'm saying... ." She trailed off, obviously unsure of what she was saying. "If I could just have... uh-oh, no, I won't say it. I won't ask. I'll be a good girl, okay?" She smiled weakly, ingratiatingly.

"So you're going to back out?"

Cirocco frowned. "I didn't say that. Did I? Come on, Gaby, you know it's dangerous. You said so yourself. What we ought to do is back off, don't rush into it, and in a little while ... well, it'll be obvious what... ." Once more she lost the train of thought.

"Okay," Gaby said, getting up. "I don't know if we have the time, but I thought you'd say something like this. I'm not sure Gene's going to give us the time. I think he was up to something. I don't know what. But this has to be started now, not later. It's just a feasibility study, Rocky. Think of it that way."

"I don't know if I can ... well, do it without arousing suspicion."

"Sure you can."

"No. No, this is too rash. I've thought it over. Wait; then I'll help you."

"No." She waited for Cirocco to understand her, saw the feeble smile slowly fade. "It may be too late already. If you won't do it, I will. And I think I'd better tell those two pilgrims they might be better off without us."

Cirocco started to say something, but Gaby didn't want to hear it. She left the room as quickly as she could.

The Melody Shop had been designed and built with Titanides in mind. The ceilings were high, and the doors were wide. The few carpets were placed only where there were human-sized chairs, a reminder to Titanides to stay off them. Much of the hardwood floor was covered in sawdust or straw. The big table in the library had a human side and a Titanide side, half with chairs and half with straw floors. It had high windows that faced east, toward the Midnight Sea, and a stone fireplace, now cold. Gaby had gathered everyone there because of the view. While she said what she had to say, they could look out over the land they had yet to cover and thus perhaps make a more informed decision.

"I guess there's no easy way to say this. It's doubly hard because of some of the things I've already said to some of you. But from this point I'm rescinding all promises about Cirocco. She is much worse off than I thought. I don't know yet if she'll be going with me, but whether she does or not, it's time to reevaluate decisions you all made based on wrong information. I told you that Rocky would pull out of it and be useful and ... and that she'd be an asset rather than a burden. I can no longer stand behind that."

She scanned the six faces. With the exception of Hautbois, she knew what each of the Titanides would say. About Chris and Robin she was not so sure. Chris had problems of his own, possibly of a temporary nature, and she would never dare guess what Robin might do.

"It boils down to this. I will be going on around the rim. Rocky may join me. You all are welcome if you wish to come. If Rocky goes, she may let one or more of us down in some important ways. By that I mean a little more than just the fact we'd have to take care of her if she managed to get drunk again. That's not the problem. Whether this makes you angry or not, Chris, and you, too, Robin, either of you could put us in the same position and probably will. In a way Rocky has no more control of it than you two do.

"That I'm willing to accept. I can't tell you why, I guess, but I do, for all three of you. I'll take care of you when you're incapacitated, and so will all the Titanides."

"We actually view your disabilities as no more serious than the human trait of falling asleep," Hornpipe put in hesitantly. "It is the same thing for us. When you sleep, we have to look out for you."

"He's got a point," Gaby said. "Anyway, my fears about Rocky are that she will let us down through a failure of nerve. I never thought I'd have to say that, but there it is. I'm no longer sure she'd put the welfare of the group over her own personal needs. I feel I hardly know her. But I have to view her as unreliable.

"As I said, I'm going anyway. What I need to know is what your plans are. Hornpipe?"

"I'll stay with Cirocco. If she goes, fine."

Gaby nodded. She raised her eyebrows to Psaltery, who barely bothered to nod. She knew he would go with her.

"Valiha?"

"I would like to continue on," she said. "But only if Chris goes."

"Right. Hautbois?"

"I must complete the circuit," she said. "I have never been a hindmother, and this is my best chance."

"Okay. Glad to have you. What about you, Chris?"

It looked like an effort for Chris to so much as lift his gaze from the table. He had recovered from his latest attack hours ago, but as usual with attacks in which there had been no memory loss, he was emotionally exhausted and had no more self-esteem than a whipped dog.

"I think you're minimizing the problem," he muttered. "The problem with me, I mean. Why should I expect more of Cirocco than I can of myself?" Valiha reached for his hand, but he jerked it away. "I'll go if you'll have me."

"We knew what we were getting into," Gaby said. "You're welcome here. Robin?"

There was a long pause. Gaby worried while Robin made up her mind. The witch's alternative, so far as Gaby could see, was a climb up the spoke. Robin was capable of setting out on that trip, knowing she would die on the way.

"I'll go," she said finally.

"Sure? Couldn't you back out with honor?"

"Since you offered, yes, I could. But I'll go."

Gaby had no intention of questioning her beyond that

"That leaves only Rocky and Hornpipe as maybes. All right. Gather up your things. Meet me on the front porch in one rev."

It was a somber departure.

The clouds which had for two hectorevs broken on the precipice of Machu Picchu were now sending outriders rolling over the Melody Shop. The celestial spotlight was blotted out. The great white house stood silent in the gloom, its life drained away. Inside, Gaby was latching the storm shutters.

The saddlebags of the Titanides had been reprovisioned. There was little left to do, but still, Gaby bustled about like a vacationer fearful she would forget something. Chris and Robin both knew she was hoping for Cirocco to make an appearance, and neither of them expected the Wizard to do so.

A bolt of lightning flashed between the twin peaks of Cirocco's mountain retreat. The Titanides did not react, but Chris and Robin milled nervously. Chris stepped into Valiha's hand and settled himself on her back. Robin mounted Hautbois. They all waited.

Gaby came out and jumped onto Psaltery. She looked back at the house, in time to see the doorknob turn. Cirocco came out, tall in her red blanket and bare feet. She looked ashen and weak. She came down the steps carefully and walked over to Psaltery and Gaby. She held her hands over her head.

"I don't have anything. See for yourself."

"I'm not going to search you, Rocky."

"Oh." It didn't seem to matter to her. She dropped her arms, then leaned on Psaltery's flank. "You're right, you know. I'd better go with you."

"All right." There was a note of relief in Gaby's voice, but little enthusiasm.

It began to rain once more as they crossed the rope bridge. On the other side, Robin heard a droning noise. It was hard to find the source with the mountains all around. She heard it get louder and then fade away. Both Gaby and Psaltery were anxiously scanning the clouds.

"What was that?"

Gaby shivered. "Don't ask."