Your Fathers, Where Are They? And the Prophets, Do They Live Forever?

BUILDING 57

— So you know his name was Don Banh?

—

— What, now you’re not talking?

— I don’t think we should do this.

— This is the worst time to start testing me. They keep saying some sniper will kill me anyway. I might as well take you with me.

— It won’t do any good to rehash this.

— That’s not your decision to make. You’re going to answer my questions like you’ve been doing. So what happened?

— He was armed and I fired at him.

— Were there other officers with you?

— Yes.

— Did they hit him?

— Yes they did.

— Did they kill him?

— Yes they did. Well, he died later at the hospital.

— Why did they shoot him?

— He was armed and was threatening officers.

— What was he armed with?

— A knife.

— Where was he?

— In his backyard, I believe.

— Okay. We’re going to do this in a workmanlike way. You answer every single question I have or else I do something to you. As long as you answer the questions I can hold steady. But if you piss me off I won’t be able to control it. Are you ready?

— Yes.

— So your shift starts at what time?

— Three in the afternoon.

— And it goes until?

— Eleven p.m.

— What happened at the beginning of the shift?

— Most of the night was typical. From three until eight, I was patrolling.

— And what other calls did you respond to?

— I don’t remember all of them, but there were two calls about the same homeless person defecating in the Dollar Tree parking lot.

— And what happened there?

— I spoke to the gentleman, and told him he was not permitted to do that.

— You didn’t arrest him.

— No. He was harmless.

— So you used restraint there.

— I always try to.

— Okay. I want to keep that statement in my back pocket for a little while. This concept of restraint is interesting to me. So what other calls were there that night?

— One or two instances of citizens seeing suspicious characters in their neighborhoods. That kind of thing.

— And what do you do in that situation?

— I drive over, look around, maybe wait with my lights off, see if I see anyone skulking about.

— And did you see anyone skulking about?

— No.

— Anything else?

— That night I believe there was someone bashing mailboxes.

— All right. Then what happens?

— Well, about eight fifteen p.m. we got a call about a man who had been acting erratically at the Denny’s on the highway.

— What exactly did you hear?

— That a man in his early to mid thirties had come into a Denny’s and had taken off his shirt. Then he’d gone into the kitchen and had put on an apron.

— That’s it?

— Then he returned to the dining area and apparently stood on one of the tables. And then he walked from table to table that way. Standing on the tabletops, yelling.

— While wearing the apron.

— Yes.

— And that was the incident at Denny’s? What was he yelling?

— He was yelling loudly about how there was a reckoning coming and how powerful he was. It was apocalyptic. He said he made the world and could end it.

— Okay. And then what?

— I went to the Denny’s to check it out, but he had left. I drove along the highway but didn’t see any sign of him. The patrons were divided about whether or not he arrived by car. None of them had seen him enter or leave in a car, so I had no vehicle or plate to follow. I had the suspicion that he had simply parked far enough away that no one saw him arrive or leave by car.

— So you circled the neighborhood or what?

— I took statements from the staff and patrons, and meanwhile there was an APB out for this young man.

— An all-points bulletin.

— Yes.

— This was big news in Marview.

— It was cause for concern.

— But he hadn’t harmed anyone.

— He had endangered the patrons by jumping from table to table. And he had stolen from the restaurant.

— What did he steal? It was syrup, correct?

— Yes. It was not a high-value item, but it was theft, and it’s our job to look into any theft.

— So what’s next? Was everyone looking for him?

— Yes. The three other squad cars on patrol began looking for him.

— By what, triangulating the neighborhood?

— We were looking within a five-mile radius for any cars driving erratically, any men fitting his description, or for any irregularities in general.

— But this was a Friday night. I expect there would be dozens of young men acting like asses.

— Not exactly like this. When the man is alone, it’s cause for more concern. A bunch of teenagers, or a bunch of guys in general, it’s one thing. But a man alone, without a shirt, jumping around a Denny’s and stealing syrup — it’s cause for special concern.

— So you’re looking for him, too?

— Yes, after I took statements at the restaurant, I began a search.

— Without any identifying characteristics.

— Well, I had a description of the young man. I knew he was Amerasian. And he left wearing an apron.

— You know no one says “Amerasian” anymore.

— Listen. I know these kids. I was in Vietnam for Christ’s sake. We said Amerasian for years. I can’t keep up with terminology.

— So you drive around looking for him.

— Yes.

— For how long?

— Forty-five minutes, an hour.

— Then what?

— Then we received a call from his mother.

— What did she say?

— That he had come home, ranting and raving, and that he’d left with a big knife.

— Did you go to the house?

— I didn’t, but another officer did. He took her statement and shared that information with the other officers.

— So now you’re looking for a young man in an apron, no shirt, and carrying a big knife.

— Yes. And he took her car, so now we knew he was driving a blue Honda Accord.

— But you didn’t find it.

— No. Then we got a call from a young woman’s house.

— You remember her name?

— No. It might have been Lily.

— Lily Dubuchet.

— Yes, I believe that was it.

— Who called?

— Her father called because the young man had been there. He’d broken the large window in the house. Apparently he heaved a cinder block through the picture window in the living room. When the family came to the window, he was breaking the windows on their cars.

— With what?

— A brick at first, then large stones he took from the driveway. Some kind of decorative stones that he was throwing through the windows and windshields of their cars.

— So the father called after he’d left?

— No, he was still there when the father called.

— Okay. I didn’t know that part.

— So two squad cars turned around and headed to the house.

— Were you one of those cars?

— I was.

— And when you got there?

— The young man was gone. I stayed to take a statement, and the other officer went in the direction the young man was last seen.

— He was driving his mom’s car.

— Yes. He left and sped down Willow, toward the highway.

— Did he threaten anyone at this young woman’s house?

— I don’t know.

— But you do know.

— You’re asking if he directly threatened anyone?

— Yes.

— He broke a plate-glass window.

— And was anyone harmed?

— Glass splintered throughout the room. Everyone was struck by glass fragments.

— And that’s it?

— As far as I recall.

— What about the knife?

— What about it?

— Did he threaten anyone with the knife at that house?

— Not that I recall.

— So he breaks some windows and then drives off.

— Yes.

— And you go in pursuit.

— Another officer went looking for his car.

— You stayed to get statements.

— I stayed for a few minutes.

— Until?

— Until I got word on the radio that he was back home.

— So he went from Lily’s house back home.

— Yes, apparently.

— So you went there.

— Yes. Three squad cars arrived at about the same time.

— And then what?

— We approached the front door and the mother came out.

— And did what?

— She said that her son had entered the house and had gone into the basement and locked himself inside.

— Okay. So there are how many cops at this point?

— Four.

— Four cops. And there’s one man in the basement.

— Yes.

— At this point are you aware of what size man he is?

— Yes. We knew at that point he was about five seven, 150 pounds.

— Not a large man.

— No.

— So you four officers, you do what?

— Well, first we went inside and knocked on the door to the basement.

— And?

— And he told us to go fuck ourselves.

— Did you try to open the door?

— It was locked and it wasn’t procedure to break it down.

— Why not?

— Well, he was armed, and we didn’t know at that point if he’d further armed himself. His mother said that he had been acting erratically and had pushed her against a wall. So we felt his behavior was unpredictable.

— So you called more cops?

— We called the Monterey Peninsula Regional Special Response Unit, yes.

— This is a SWAT team.

— Yes.

— Tell me about the decision to call them.

— Well, SWAT team officers are trained for hostage situations and—

— Were there hostages in the house?

— We weren’t sure.

— But did you have any evidence to suggest he’d taken a hostage?

— Not hard evidence, no.

— Did you ask the mother if her son had somehow snuck a hostage into the house?

— No, we did not.

— Did she tell you that he might have? Did she see some other person in the house?

— No.

— So I don’t know where you get the idea that he might have had a hostage.

— We have to prepare for any eventuality. I’m not saying that a hostage situation was foremost on our minds. But it was one of the possibilities. Hostages aren’t a prerequisite for the participation of the SWAT team.

— Okay, so at this point, you’re still standing by the basement door or what?

— No. At that point, we removed the mother from the home and fell back to the driveway.

— You fell back? Like this is some great battle. Jesus.

—

— You set up a perimeter or what?

— We did.

— But you’re still thinking that the threat is one man — a small man with a knife, sitting in his basement.

— At that point we didn’t know what he was armed with or what he was capable of. He’d done some very erratic things, including assaulting his mother.

— Was there evidence of an assault on his mother?

— He pushed her against a wall.

— Were there blood, cuts, bruises?

— No.

— So we have a man who pushed his mom against a wall.

— Yes. And he was armed with a knife.

— And did he threaten his mother with that knife?

— I can’t recall. But if he assaults someone, and he’s holding a knife, I have to assume that’s assault with a deadly weapon.

— But he didn’t assault her with the knife.

— He assaulted her and he was holding a knife.

— But did he threaten his mother with a knife?

— I can’t really recall.

— You can’t recall. Listen, you’ve been honest and forthright so far. You should stay that way. I know it’s been a while since I reminded you of this, but you’re chained to a post.

— I don’t think he threatened her, no.

— Thank you. So how long until the SWAT team arrives?

— Twenty, twenty-five minutes.

— How many on the SWAT team?

— Ten.

— All men?

— All men at that point.

— And so they arrive. Then what?

— They spread out throughout the property.

— What, like on the roof, backyard, everything?

— I think there were probably two covering the front door, two on the back porch door, and two on each of the other exits.

— What were the other exits?

— There were two basement windows that could be opened. Two of the men saw him near one of the windows, so we kept them guarded.

— And at that point, did you tell him to come out or what?

— We told him that he needed to come out, hands up, and surrender.

— You’re using a megaphone?

— Yes.

— And did he answer?

— He told us to fuck ourselves.

— That’s it?

— That was it for a while.

— How long did the verbal exchange go on for?

— Forty minutes maybe. He only answered us a few times. We tried to call him, but he was not picking up his cell phone.

— So for forty minutes, you’re talking to him intermittently. Did you have any reason to believe that he was arming himself in any new way?

— How do you mean?

— Did he ever say, “Now I have a grenade,” or anything like that?

— No he did not.

— He didn’t build himself a cannon or nuclear warhead?

— No.

— So you still think he’s a guy with a knife, walking around his basement. And he’s alone.

— Yes. But we don’t know if he’s armed himself further. The mother said that there was the possibility of him hiding a gun down there.

— Had she ever seen a gun on him?

— No.

— Did she have a gun in the house he might be using?

— I don’t believe so.

— So you have no real reason to think he’s acquired a gun somehow.

— No hard evidence, no.

— Then what happens?

— Well, at a certain point, I’d say an hour in, he said he was coming out through the front door.

— Okay.

— And so we sent more of our team to the front door.

— How many men at the front door at that point?

— I would say twelve officers.

— And were you there?

— I was.

— Okay. Eight SWAT team members at the front door, and you and three regular Marview cops?

— Yes.

— All right. And who’s guarding the backyard at that point?

— Two SWAT team members.

— And then what happened?

— We wait at the front door for a few minutes, and we see no sign of him at the front door. Then one of the SWAT guys in the backyard says that he’s just emerged from one of the basement windows.

— So the front-door thing was a ruse.

— That was our understanding.

— So he comes out the back window. And then what? Where was he going?

— He seemed to be trying to escape through the backyard. He was heading for the fence at the back of the yard. We had to assume he was going to hop the fence and make off into the neighbor’s property. So the SWAT team member saw him and told him to halt.

— And did he?

— He did. He stopped, turned, and that’s when the officer saw that he was still carrying the knife.

— The same knife.

— Yes.

— Remind me how big the knife is. What kind was it?

— It was an eight-inch kitchen knife.

— Like the kind you’d use to cut what, a steak?

— Yes, a steak, a turkey.

— Was the blade eight inches, or the whole knife was eight inches?

— I don’t recall.

— Okay, we both know it was a regular steak knife. The kind you get at Outback. A little bigger than a normal one at the dinner table.

— I can’t confirm that.

— Well, I can. It’s a fact. So he’s standing there, and he’s holding the Outback steak knife.

— He was holding the knife and he would not relinquish it. The officers demanded he drop the knife, but he refused.

— And when did you come to the backyard?

— Almost immediately.

— How soon till all fourteen cops are in the backyard?

— Two stayed in the front yard.

— Okay. Twelve of you.

— Maybe twenty seconds.

— So twenty seconds after he emerges from the basement, all twelve of you are in the backyard with him. And he’s holding the knife, and you’re all yelling for him to drop the knife.

— That’s correct.

— Where in the backyard was he standing?

— He stopped running near the back fence and had taken some steps back toward the house, so I’d say he was in the middle-back of the yard.

— Okay. And where are all you guys?

— We made a half circle around him.

— So there are twelve of you surrounding him, all of you with guns drawn?

— Yes.

— You’re pointing what kind of gun at him?

— My service revolver.

— And the SWAT guys?

— Semiautomatics.

— So there are twelve guns pointed at him.

— Yes.

— And what’s he doing at this point?

— At that point he was waving the knife around in a threatening manner.

— Like how, exactly? He’s jabbing it toward people?

— Yes. He’s jabbing, and he’s yelling.

— What was he saying to you?

— Saying he was immortal, that he would cut our eyes out. That kind of thing.

— Hold on a second. I didn’t know the part about being immortal. That wasn’t in the police report. Tell me everything you can remember him saying.

— Well, there was the stuff about being immortal. He would say, “You know, you guys are just shades.” He called us shades. He said he was the source of light, that he was the sun. He said he was the sun and he couldn’t be killed.

— That’s it?

— He told us to stay away or lose our eyes.

— He mostly threatened your eyes?

— Yes. That he’d cut out our eyes.

— Anything else?

— He also said he wrote the Bible. He quoted some line.

— What line?

— I don’t remember. Something about missing fathers.

— Did he say he would kill you?

— I think he said he would live forever. That he was a prophet.

— Did he say he would kill you?

— Not that I can remember.

— Now how far away from him are you at this point?

— Me myself?

— Yes.

— Maybe twenty-five feet.

— Did you fear for your life?

— I felt in danger, yes.

— Let me back up a second. What were you wearing at that point?

— Just my uniform.

— No bulletproof vest?

— I was wearing a vest, yes.

— Okay. So you’re wearing a bulletproof vest. Are the SWAT team members wearing vests, too?

— Yes.

— So all twelve of you were wearing vests?

— Yes.

— Okay. Would a bulletproof vest stop a knife?

— How do you mean?

— If I threw a knife from twenty-five feet away, would the vest stop it from penetrating your skin?

— Yes. I would think so.

— It can stop a bullet, right? So it could stop a kitchen knife.

— Yes.

— Okay. Were you wearing a helmet?

— I was not.

— But the SWAT guys were.

— Yes.

— So most of you are wearing helmets, and everyone’s wearing vests. But you say you were concerned for your life.

— I was.

— Please explain that to me.

— We had an armed man who was in some kind of psychotic state. He attacked his mother and he was acting erratically, swinging around a large knife.

— But there’s twelve guns against one knife. And with the vests, you’re basically standing behind bulletproof glass.

— Vests are not like bulletproof glass. And remember, this man had legs. He could get to any one of us in a second or two.

— And that’s what he tried to do?

— He was moving around. And for a while, it was within a certain perimeter. But when he got closer, we were forced to act.

— He got closer?

— He made a move toward us. He lunged.

— That’s when you fired your gun?

— Yes. I did and the rest of the team did.

— How many bullets did the autopsy reveal had been fired into him?

— Three.

— But weren’t you all shooting at him?

— No, only three of us fired our weapons.

— And did the three bullets stop him?

— Yes. He dropped to the ground.

— And then what?

— We approached him with caution, and when we saw that he had dropped the knife, we called the ambulance.

— And when did you know you’d killed him?

— A few hours later. We were at the hospital.

— You waited there at the hospital?

— Yes I did. There were at least six officers there. We did not want the young man to die.

— But you shot him.

— We shot him to subdue him.

— How close do you think he got to you?

— How do you mean?

— When he was stepping toward you, was he running?

— He moved very quickly.

— Was he running?

— He had begun to run, yes.

— And how far did he move toward you?

— We measured it at eight feet.

— Okay. So you said you had been twenty-five feet away from him. When you shot him, if he’d moved eight feet toward you, he was still seventeen feet away from you. Is that right?

— Yes.

— Okay, wait. Let me go over here. About as far away as I am from you now. Is this the distance?

— Yes. About.

— So he died about seventeen feet from you.

— Yes.

— How many times did you personally shoot him?

— Shoot or hit?

— Both.

— I shot three times and hit him once.

— Where did you hit him?

— Once in the neck.

— Is that where you were aiming?

— I was aiming at a figure moving quickly toward me. We’re taught to aim into the largest part of the target. And that’s the torso.

— You wanted to stop his forward motion.

— Yes.

— And you did stop it.

— Yes. Listen, I didn’t enjoy it. I have never fired my weapon since that night. I’m not some cowboy. I know it doesn’t diminish your pain, but it was traumatic for me, too. I would have preferred any other outcome.

— That’s fine. But here’s the thing: it seems like there were other possible outcomes. I just never understood the concept, the logistics of all this. There are twelve heavily armed men, and you’re surrounding this small man with a knife. He has no criminal record, and the two things you know he’s done wrong that night are he’s danced on some tables at Denny’s and pushed his mom against a wall. Then a couple hours later he’s dead in his own backyard. This kind of thing happens once a week.

— Here it does?

— Somewhere it does. Last week they shot a guy in a wheelchair.

— An armed man threatens a group of police officers, there will be bad outcomes.

— The wheelchair guy had a length of pipe. Why not just leave him alone? With Don, you removed the mom from the house. Why not just let him sit around in the basement?

— Let an armed man accused of assault roam free?

— He’s in his basement. He’s not roaming anywhere.

— He was armed and probably psychotic. We have to presume he’s dangerous.

— But you didn’t really think he was dangerous.

— Of course we did.

— But you didn’t. You worked in Marview. This is some confused young man with a steak knife. He had a college degree, no prior record.

— Lee Harvey Oswald didn’t have a record, either.

— Good. Good one. But really, when the SWAT team showed up, did you ever think, Well, maybe this is a bit much for one guy in a basement?

— No. We have to prepare for the worst.

— Well, that’s true in a way, isn’t it? You guys prepare for the worst, even in Marview. Doesn’t that seem insane? A bunch of little towns by the ocean have a SWAT team? In case we get attacked by some army of sea lions?

— We have a fire department, too, even when there hasn’t been a fatal fire in twenty-two years.

— But firemen don’t have guns. You know how many SWAT teams there are in the country now? Of course you don’t. Fifty thousand. Every fucking suburb has a SWAT team. And it’s not because there’s been some sudden surge of hostage situations in Westchester and Orange County. It’s because you fuckers like to get dressed up.

— That is incorrect.

— You love it. That’s why you got into the line of work in the first place. The gear. The fucking Batman utility belt.

— You have no idea what you’re talking about.

— I have every idea what I’m talking about because you killed my friend. Don’t you ever say I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about. I know everything. I’m the moral man here. I’m the man of principle.

—

— You know I’m the moral man here.

—

— Tell me you understand that.

— I understand that you want me to believe it.

— You better believe it. Motherfucker, you better believe it. You’re the one who fucked up. You have blood on your hands. You’re soaked in the blood of an innocent. Do you realize that?

— It was an unfortunate incident.

— See, just those words indicate no respect for human life. An incident ends a human life? No, that’s an apocalypse. The death of a young person for no reason is an apocalypse. It’s not an incident. Don was not an incident. You understand that? Is a person an incident?

— No.

— Was my friend an incident?

— No.

— Did you participate in the apocalypse that ended my friend?

—

— Don’t tempt me.

— Yes.

— And there was no other way to subdue him? A taser? Pepper spray? A big net? Rubber bullets? Think for a second.

— In hindsight, there might have been a different solution. But he was armed and seemed about to do something terrible. This is how it usually happens. A guy seems harmless and then has a night where things go down a rabbit hole and people get killed. Every murderer has to start somewhere, and we were determined to stop him from hurting anyone.

— Tell me this, though: the guy’s in the basement. Do you think, if you had simply left him there at the house, someone would have been hurt? I mean, instead of the standoff, with you demanding him to come out and him getting increasingly agitated, what if you had just left? Take the mom, leave the house, leave him alone. What do you think would have happened?

— He could have gotten right back into a car and he could have done something far worse than he already had.

— But you could have followed him. You could follow him around all night.

— And then we have a high-speed chase.

— You really think this was destined for some disastrous result?

— He was in a fugue state. I think his behavior was getting increasingly bizarre and dangerous.

— So you’re all standing around him, the small man with a steak knife. And you said he came toward you. I understand the need to protect yourself. But why shoot him in the head?

— I did not aim for his head.

— One of your colleagues did.

— My supposition is that that officer was aiming for his torso, too.

— But why not just shoot him in the leg?

— We’re trained to stop the aggressor and remove the threat. The best way to do that is to shoot at the torso. The torso is the largest target, and shooting there is the best chance to stop his forward movement.

— But you shot him in the neck and someone else shot him in the eye.

— I missed. I aimed for his torso, but it all happened very quickly.

— So again, why not just shoot him in the leg? Even before he started moving toward you, why not just shoot him in the leg and call it a day? He’d be immobilized instantly.

— If I shoot at his leg and miss, he could very well come at me and stick the knife in my neck.

— You’re serious. You were really worried that he’d hurt you.

— Of course I was. Have you heard of the twenty-one-foot rule?

— Tell me.

— The basic principle is that if a suspect is within twenty-one feet of an officer, and is holding an edged weapon like a knife, then that suspect presents a clear and present danger to the officer. And deadly force against him is justified.

— So if a man is holding a knife within twenty-one feet of a cop, the cop is justified in shooting him.

— If that suspect is threatening to use it, yes.

— Why twenty-one feet?

— That’s the area the suspect could cover in a short amount of time — not enough time for the officer to escape or protect himself. This was based on research done by an officer in Salt Lake City.

— So tell me something. If I’m holding a knife, and you’re twenty-two feet away, all you have to do is step one foot closer to me, and then you get to shoot me. Isn’t that possible?

— No.

— Yes it is. By your interpretation, it’s possible.

— The rule is a guideline for officers to know the distance within which the suspect could reasonably present a deadly threat.

— Does the suspect have to be moving toward you?

— Not necessarily. If he’s threatening me with a knife, and he’s within twenty-one feet, then I’m permitted to use deadly force.

— Oh shit.

— What?

— This is what I feared. I mean, I knew you could be one of those cops misinterpreting that rule, but I hoped you weren’t. I wanted it to be more complicated.

— I’m not misinterpreting anything.

— But you are, you fucking asshole. The twenty-one-foot rule is … Do you really not know? You’ve got that look on your face that says you have no idea what I’m talking about but you think I might actually know something you don’t.

— That isn’t the look on my face. I’m tired, and now I’m getting angry.

— Stop. You have no idea. Let me describe what the twenty-one-foot rule actually is. The rule says that a suspect armed with a knife can cover twenty-one feet in the amount of time a cop can remove his gun from his holster, aim it and fire it. Do you understand?

— Yes. But I’m not sure that’s correct.

— It’s a guideline. If you’re faced with a man armed with a knife, and you’re within twenty-one feet, you should get your weapon out. That’s what the rule states. Just that you should have your weapon unholstered if an armed man is that close.

— I don’t believe that’s true.

— It is true. That’s from the manual, you idiot.

—

— You have nothing to say?

—

— This is so fucked up. I think you shot my best friend because you and your buddies can’t read. I think you shot my best friend in the neck and head because you thought there was some rule that allowed you to do it. Some rule that you were too lazy or stupid to actually look up and read. You hear that the rule says you have to shoot anyone with a knife if you’re within twenty-one feet, and so you shoot a tiny guy holding a kitchen knife who poses no threat to anyone. Doesn’t that seem fucked up to you? I’ll answer for you. It is fucked up. And you’re a fucking idiot. And you know what else? I don’t think he was even moving. I know you say now that he was moving toward you, but I’m betting he wasn’t. I know you got everyone to agree with you that he was moving, but I think he just turned toward you. The one autopsy said that the bullet entered his neck at an angle that indicated his head had just turned toward you. I think he turned toward you, and you freaked out and shot him. And you thought all this was acceptable because you were thinking of the twenty-one-foot rule, which you don’t even fucking understand.

— You’re mistaken on all your facts.

— I think you killed my friend because you can’t read.

— Fuck you.

— Okay, maybe you can read. But think how silly it looks to the world that twelve cops in SWAT gear can’t subdue one five foot seven man holding a kitchen knife. I mean, doesn’t it make you feel a little embarrassed?

— No. These people don’t understand the actual dangers.

— Because there aren’t actual dangers in that situation.

— Do you know how long it takes for an agile person to cover that twenty-one feet? It’s about a second and a half. In that time, if your friend had decided to stick that knife in my neck or my face, he would have done it.

— But you had your gun out.

— Yes, to prevent him from killing me.

— I’ll tell you why you shot him. Because you were all gathered around him, and you assumed the logical end to that situation is your guns are fired and someone is dead. It doesn’t seem right otherwise. Do you agree with that?

— No.

— That every story ends with the firing of a gun?

— No.

— That you should get your way, on your timetable?

— No.

— You were all yelling at him, saying drop the knife, do as we say, do it now, do it now. And he doesn’t. He yells more. Your adrenaline boils. And you want it all to end. There must be an end, and it must come quickly. You can’t wait. You can’t back down. Your guns all drawn have failed to make him do what you want him to do, and that drives you all crazy. You think, You’ll submit to our will.

— No.

— And you’ll do it now, because we’ve already been here, what, ten minutes?

—

— That’s enough time, right? Too much time. The narrative was departing from what you recognize as normal and true. Normal and true is that he submits or he dies on your timetable.

— No.

— Do you realize what a strange race of people we are? No one else expects to get their way like we do. Do you know the madness that this unleashes upon the world — that we expect to have our way every time we get some idea in our head? That twelve heavily armed men can surround one man with a steak knife and the outcome is a backyard execution? Does that not indicate to you that we have work to do? That as a people we have improving to do?

—

— Well?

— Well what? Sure. We have improving to do. I’m chained to a post. You have improving to do. Your friend is dead. We have improving to do. This base is collapsing around us. We have improving to do. To know this — I can’t see why this is helpful to you or anyone else. All this, and I don’t think you’ve learned a thing.

— You’re so wrong. God, I love how wrong you are.