Guide to Oral Adultery

Chapter Five…

Case History:

Name: Slone B.

Age: 31

Slone is a trim, pretty woman who looks almost ten years younger than her actual age. She is married to a social worker and is the mother of three small children.

“I've never thought of myself as being a very sexual person but, lately, that's just what I've become. I know that women attain the peak of their sexuality in their thirties just as men reach it in their teens. I assume that's why I've become an adulteress in the past few months.

“During my teens I was a rather prim and proper type who rarely dated. When a boy got fresh with me I always put him in his place. I was considered to be a 'good' girl by my parents but a 'pill' to the boys.

“I went through college with my virginity intact which is some kind of achievement in itself. After that I went into social work which was where I met Norman, my husband. Norman was only a few years older and I thought him to be nice even if he wasn't exactly handsome. He seemed to be very serious about his work and put in a lot of overtime. When I asked him why he worked so hard he told me that all he had was an empty room to return to at night and he had to kill time somehow.

“Norman was a very lonely young man and this drew him to me more. I was still living with my parents so I had some kind of family life but he had nothing. When I invited him for dinner one day he seemed so grateful that I felt like crying.

“My mother and father liked Norman and were glad to see that he was such a serious-minded young man and not like the fellows who still acted like kids even though they were in their twenties. In my teens I used to date some of these boys and they all seemed to be just as young as they were then. They were hung up on cars, girls and surfing in that order. Sometimes they would combine all three and load up a car with girls and take off for the beach. The fellows got very tan, muscular and handsome but they weren't the type to depend on for a future. I pitied the girls who ran after them because these young men had no thought of marriage in their empty heads. Norman, however, was the exact opposite. He knew that marriage was a serious business and prepared himself for it. He put most of his money in the bank for the house he hoped to own one day. All those beach bums never saved a dollar in their lives. They spent it as soon as it came.

“Norman didn't propose until he was sure that he had enough for a down payment on the kind of house he wanted along with a lot of new furniture. He even figured my salary into his plans and knew just how much I would make before I had to drop out to have a baby.

“Everything went according to plan. I had my first baby almost to the day he had expected it to come. Since I had to take care of the house and the child Norman worked extra hours to make up for the salary I used to bring in. He didn't seem to mind, though. 'I used to do overtime because I hated to go back to my room,' he told me. 'Now I work overtime so I can have a nice house, wife and baby to come back to at night.'

“As a lover Norman was virile when he wanted to be. After so many years of solitude he really enjoyed sleeping with someone for a change. When he held me in his arms it was as if he wanted to make up for all that he had lacked in life. He confessed to me that he had gone to prostitutes, though, before we were married. 'I just had to let go sometimes,' he said. 'It wasn't anything serious. Those women were simply outlets and nothing more. I'm glad now I don't need to return to them.'

“Just because a man is quiet, studious and hard-working doesn't mean he is not interested in sex. Norman was a man like any other and had to have a woman now and then during his bachelorhood. I didn't get angry over his trips to a house of prostitution. He was twenty-four when he married me and I could hardly expect him to come to the wedding night a virgin.

“I, needless to say, did marry as a virgin. Norman knew this and so was very considerate with me. He didn't push himself on to me and aroused me first by rubbing my breasts and vagina with his hands. Then he placed his body on top of mine and inched his stiff penis into my cleft slowly. He pushed the entire length of his sex organ into me and began to pump. My nipples grew to hard points and my vagina felt as if it were on fire. Although Norman didn't look it he was a very passionate man.

“My husband made the bed squeal with his thrusting movements and I was afraid that the other guests at the honeymoon hotel would hear it and know what was going on. In the middle of my first sex experience I thought of appearances, that's how proper I was then.

“Norman stopped moving and had an orgasm. His warm semen filled my body and both of us breathed hard. As it turned out Norman made me pregnant on our honeymoon and I wouldn't be surprised if my first baby came with his first load of sperm.

“As a boy Norman never did have much of a family and he was sent from relative to relative until he became old enough to go out on his own. He told me that he wanted to have a real family of his own and that's why he was delighted when the babies came at the rate of one every second year for the first six years of our marriage. Soon I was up to my arm pits in diapers and toddlers clothes. I didn't complain, though, because I had become a woman. No one could call me a 'pill' now… not after having three children in six years.

“Norman checked his finances and discovered that we couldn't afford another child right away so I started to buy birth control pills. Now I could really enjoy sex without having to worry about becoming pregnant. While my husband continued to have sex with me he never tried anything different…you know… orally or anally. When I tried to force the issue and lick his penis one night he seemed shocked. 'You shouldn't do that, Slone,' he told me. 'Only whores do that.'

“I was even more shocked than he was by his attitude. I always had the idea that men liked all kinds of sex but Norman only wanted to do it one way. It was true that he was virile but he was also very dull.

“I never did try to attempt anything different after that in bed. It had taken me six years to work up to a point where I thought he would accept such an overture. Norman had never tried oral sex on me, I had always figured, because he was just too considerate of my feelings. Now I realized that he thought fellatio and cunnilingus to be perversions that only prostitutes engaged in. I was sure that those bachelor trips to the bordello had something to do with this belief. He probably had had these women perform oral acts upon him and then he felt guilty about it afterwards. There were some parts of my husband's life that were a closed book.

“The older I got the more sensual I became. As a girl I had very little interest in sex and now I wanted more and more of it. When I looked at my three children growing up I felt that life was passing me by. Sex was just a device in which to bring children into the world for me. I now envied those girls who traveled with those beach bums. Some of them had married and divorced and others were living with lovers. Had I been right in marrying a good, hard-working square like Norman who limited sex to straight fornication alone?

“My husband seemed more concerned about his job, the house, the children than in me. In his thirties he was already acting like an old man. He worried about everything and was uncomfortable at parties. When he told me that it would be a good idea to rent one of the rooms to make some extra money I went along with him not knowing what I was going to let myself in for.

“Norman told me that he wasn't going to bring a complete stranger into the house. He said that Harry, a social worker we both knew, needed a room. He was single, twenty-three, and very good-looking. My husband was so sure of me that he saw nothing wrong with bringing such an attractive young man into our home to live with us. It wasn't long before he discovered how little he really knew me. I wasn't the mousy house-frau of his dreams.

“Harry was easy to get along with. The children liked him and he often took them out for walks. He was also good company for my husband because they could talk over their cases. And, last but far from least, he was good company for yours truly.

“While the new roomer was popular with girls he was a bit lazy and rather spoiled. He didn't like to exert himself and chase these girls… he wanted them to come to him. The phone always rang with girls calling up and I used to listen to Harry make up excuses why he couldn't see this one and that one. If he wanted to Harry could have a different bed companion every night.

“Harry wasn't very interested in his work in social services. He only took the job because he liked the starting salary. But social work was very hard and had a big turnover in employees. I was certain that Harry wouldn't last on the job especially after he started taking too many 'sick' days off. As a single man disinterested in his job Harry could afford the risk of being fired.

“I began to see more of Harry than I did my husband. On his days off he would chat with me in the kitchen and go to the stores with me and the children. I began to look upon him as my second husband. It wasn't long before this relationship went sexual.

“It began when my oldest children were at school and the baby of the family was sleeping upstairs. Harry was on one of his 'sick' days and lazily watching television. I brought in a couple of cups of coffee and watched some silly quiz game with him. 'I would think a good-looking young guy like you would have something better to do with his time,' I chided mildly.

“He gave me a mock leer. 'What do you suggest, pretty one?'

“I blushed. Although the proposition had been done in jest it still excited me. Harry saw me react so warmly to his invitation for love and sat next to me on the couch. As I said, he was lazy but still very virile. He didn't like to chase women but if one was right there in his hands he got interested. I was there and he was most interested. 'You're a very attractive woman, Slone,' he said seriously and held my hand.

“I looked straight into his eyes and he saw my desire for him. I was never one for wearing masks. He leaned over and kissed me on the lips. I responded by embracing him tightly. Harry placed my back against the couch and put his body on top of mine in the fornicating position. He 'dry humped' me, as men liked to put it, by pumping up and down without entering my body. 'Let's take off our clothes,' he whispered.

“'Let's not, Harry,' I said. 'You're a sweet boy and I don't want to ruin a beautiful friendship.'

“'Come on, Slone,' he urged. 'What's a little fucking between friends? We won't ruin a thing.'

“He quickly opened his pants and exposed his penis. When he tried to pull down my panties I rolled over on my side sending him off on the floor where he sat with his erect dick bared and wanting. When I gazed at his vital member my face burned hotly. For years I had wondered what it was like to perform the act of fellatio. While my husband objected to it I was sure that Harry had other ideas.

“The young man stood up holding his pants with his dick showing through the unzipped part. He was about to cover himself entirely when I reached out and took his cock with my hand. Harry's expression changed from frustration to excitement in a split second. I pulled him towards me with his penis and sat up on the couch so that his sex organ was at eye level. He stood there waiting. I paused for a moment fearing that, like my husband, he might pull away and call me a degenerate. I couldn't take another slight like that. But, nothing ventured; nothing gained. I opened my mouth and took his aroused sex organ.

“Harry didn't move and stood there as I pushed my face all the way to his pubic area. I couldn't see what was degenerate about fellatio. It was really very pleasant. I pulled my mouth off his dick and examined the shiny wetness I had left on it. Once again I mouthed him and this time I started to suck.

“'Slone… Slone,' Harry sighed as I performed the act of fellatio.

“I was satisfying him orally. For the first time in my life I was having a different kind of sex. I slipped my hands around to the young man's taut buttocks and squeezed as I bobbed my head up and down on his meat. Then his sperm shot into my mouth. I gagged for a second and then started to drink in his manhood. My whole being tingled with erotic joy. There was nothing wrong with oralism at all. I couldn't see what my husband had against it.

“'Wow!' Harry gasped after I had finished. 'You sure run hot and cold. One minute you're kicking me off your body and next you're going down on me.'

“'I am a woman of mystery,' I told him. 'You would be surprised what kind of feelings I have.'

“My child began to cry upstairs reminding me that I was a wife and mother and I had just committed adultery. It had been an act of oral adultery but it was adultery just the same. Guilt took the place of passion and I hurried upstairs leaving Harry exposed and still aroused.

“When my husband came back that day for dinner I was afraid that my face might reveal my brief fling. Harry had no such fears and talked as if nothing had happened. That night I reached over and embraced Norman hoping that he would make love but all he did was mumble and fall asleep in my arms.

“Harry decided to work the next day and I made breakfast for him and Norman… my two husbands. I suppose there are few women who wouldn't mind having two men in the same house loving her. This was the way it turned out for me. Anytime Harry got me alone he would make a sexual advance. Although he wanted to have genital intercourse I only let him use my mouth. He thought that this was crazy but went along with it anyhow. While Norman screwed my vagina Harry did the same to my mouth. It was a wild situation.

“My handsome second husband still saw other girls and I found myself getting possessive of him even though I really had no right to hold the gay young bachelor. I thought that my husband found out about us one day when he said, 'I want to talk to you about Harry, Slone.'

“By the tone of his voice I took it for granted that he knew it all. Instead he complained about the days off that his co-worker was taking. 'Harry won't have his job long if he keeps calling in sick,' Norman informed me. 'We both know that he's just plain lazy.'

“I promised my husband that I would urge Harry to become more serious and breathed a sigh of relief when he left. I wondered how he would react if he ever found out about my sexual adventures with the young man. Norman took everything seriously and I was sure that the fact that I was an adulteress would break him up.

“I didn't want to hurt Norman but the only way I could prevent this was by telling Harry to leave. I was too weak to end the affair and went right on enjoying it.

“It wasn't easy to have an adulterous relationship in the same house with a husband and three children but I managed. I looked forward to the time Norman was home so he could watch the children while I drove off with Harry. I had the excuse of going to stores to cover up the affair and insisted that I didn't need the children to help me with the packages. After all, I said, I had a grown and healthy man to do that besides driving the car.

“We found special spots where we could park to make our own special kind of love. I felt like a teenage girl again except this time I was much more interested in sex. I cursed myself for not giving in to those surf bums in my youth. If I had had more love then I would not have such a great need for it now.

“Our favorite spot was a deserted parking lot behind a factory. During the week it was full when the factory was open but, during the weekends, it was as empty as a desert. Harry told me that he always brought his girls there. I knew he was teasing me to make me jealous… and he accomplished that. 'Are you ever going to marry one of these girls?' I asked.

“'Why should I buy a dairy when milk is so cheap,' he answered glibly.

“With typical male ego he had to brag to me what a popular lover he was. 'You find me cheap then?' I wanted to know.

“He realized that he had made a blunder and stammered, 'Oh… that was just a figure of speech. I hold you very dearly, Slone.'

“Harry kissed me and rubbed my legs with his hands. I wanted to resist him just to show that I wasn't all that available but I found myself opening his fly and plunging my hand inside. His penis was limp and I lowered my head. I enjoyed mouthing a limp organ just to have it grow in my mouth.

“My second husband lowered his pants and his jockey shorts to his ankles to give me loving room. I took his soft manhood and sucked. It started to erect and Harry stroked my hair as I fellated him. His male organ grew hard and swollen and I could feel him getting more aroused by my actions. If only I could make my first husband as excited, I thought.

“Harry shot his load. It was weak and not very full. This told me that he had already given the best of himself to some other girl the night before. I wouldn't be surprised if he had taken her to this very parking lot. While it was true that I had two men I was sure that Harry had more than two women. As I mouthed him I wondered where his penis had been the night before. I wondered if the girl had fellated him as I was doing now.

“After I finished we went shopping. We had to do it quickly to make up for the time lost at the parking lot… if I could call it lost time.

“My oldest child, a girl of nine, was the first to realize that Harry was more to me than a paying guest. While my husband didn't suspect a thing this little girl did. Females had an inborn instinct for the ways and means of love that males were blind to. 'You really like Harry don't you, mom?' she said to me one day using an undertone that told me she knew more than was good for her.

“'Of course I like Harry,' I said trying to pretend innocence. 'Don't you?'

“'He spends a lot of time with you,' she said. 'All my friends have been noticing.'

“I felt my house of cards falling apart. Now the neighbors were talking. I knew that I had been discreet with Harry but it didn't take much to start a rumor in my neighborhood. Even if there had been no sexual affair the neighbors would invent one. I knew that Harry couldn't stay in the house any longer no matter how much money he added to the family's finances.

“That evening I suggested to Norman that perhaps Harry would be happier living someplace else. He seemed surprised by my words. 'But he likes it here!' he exclaimed. 'Besides we need the money. Has Harry been complaining about anything?'

“'No but it is really awkward having a single young man in the house. You know how neighbors talk.'

“'Ah ha! The neighbors! Well, just ignore them dear. We know that nothing is wrong between you and Harry and that's all that matters.'

“I wanted to tell my husband that there was something very wrong going on under his own nose but I just couldn't hurt him. Since he wouldn't get Harry to leave I had to talk to the young man myself. I was sure he would understand.

“I brought up the subject at that parking lot right after we had another oral relationship. I put it to him quite bluntly that, sooner or later, our affair would be revealed if we persisted in seeing one another.

“'You want me to move, Slone?' he asked.

“'I think it will be the best thing in the long run.' Tears started to well in my eyes. It wasn't easy breaking off one of the very few close relationships in my life.

“Harry did more than just leave the house… he quit his job. This gave him a good excuse to move away. He wasn't doing it just for me; he had always hated social work.

“'Well, I'm sorry to see you go, Harry,' my husband told him. 'I liked having you around here.'

“'And I liked being around here,' he answered with a wink to me.

“After Harry left I thought my problem was solved but now my husband is talking about taking in another young bachelor he met at the office.

Even though I've begged Norman not to do it, it looks like he is determined to have the man under our roof. I don't know what to do now. I don't want to tell him about why it wouldn't be safe for me to have another man in the house but it seems the only way. Should I tell my husband the truth, doctor?”

DIAGNOSIS:

Truth can be a dangerous thing and, from what Slone told me about her husband, I felt that he would not be able to withstand the knowledge that his wife had had oral sex relations with another man. By telling Norman the reason why she couldn't have another man in the house she could keep him out but it would also destroy the marriage. If Norman felt so strongly about oral intercourse that he wouldn't allow his wife to perform fellatio upon him he certainly would not take the fact that she had been fellating another man easily. I advised the woman to throw a tantrum if she had to on the matter of accepting another house guest but, at all costs, avoid telling her husband the truth.

Slone's case proves that not all men like oral intercourse. Norman is in the very small minority, though, because Kinsey has shown in his book Sexual Behavior In the Human Male that nine out of every ten husbands enjoy some form of oral intercourse with their wives. Norman, it appears, is the tenth man who finds oral sex repulsive. As Slone had suggested he may very well have formed his opinion against fellatio during the time he visited prostitutes. To Norman oral sex and prostitution went together. He avoided oralism with his wife because he felt that it was a “perversion.”

When Slone was a teenage girl her sexual drive was weak and thus she was not really bothered by the fact other girls her age were having affairs while she did not. As she grew towards middle-age her sex drive became stronger and so she sought out ways to satisfy it. Her husband, at the same time, was on a sexual decline and this was where her problem began. Hungry for the experiences Norman would not provide she turned to another man who was only too available in the house. While Norman provided her with security and emotional stability Harry provided her with eroticism. She did, indeed, have two husbands.

Jurgen Ruesch, in his study, Therapeutic Communication, claims that many women would be happy having more than one husband at once. If bigamy were legal Slone would have been better off with two husbands rather than just one but, as it stands, she just had to give up one of her men. Giving up Harry for Norman was a good choice since the younger man had never been deeply involved with the woman. To the bachelor she was just a handy outlet for his oral drives. Norman, however, even though he was not as sexually satisfying, loved her deeply in his own quiet and serious way.

Slone never told her husband about her relationship with Harry and, as I had suggested, made such a scene about taking in another boarder that he dropped the plan altogether. Today Slone is living with only one man and she has adjusted to the fact that her husband will never become the lover she needs. Her brief fling with the handsome young bachelor has satisfied her hidden passions. Now that she has tasted the joys of oral intercourse she is no longer driven by a need to perform fellatio.