Hey There (You with the Gun in Your Hand)

Twenty-one

Our table was a riot, especially with Joey, Frank, Sammy and Buddy Hackett heckling Dino. At one point Dean pulled the four of them on stage with him and they cracked the entire audience up for a good twenty minutes while Jerry and I watched with everyone else. Then he kicked them off and we all fell quiet and listened to the man do what he did best-sing.

At one point he came out into the audience and approached a table where a young couple was sitting. They looked young enough to be newlywed, the man sandy-haired, the woman pretty and dark-haired.

“What’s your name, sweetheart?” Dean asked her.

“Shirley,” the girl said, shyly.

“And is this fine young man your husband?”

“Yes.”

“What’s his name?”

“Jerry.”

“Where are you from, Shirley.”

“San Francisco.”

“Do you think your husband would mind if I sang a song to you?”

“I wouldn’t care if he did,” she said, and everyone laughed, including her husband.

“Well, all right, then …” Dean said, and he sang “I’d Cry Like a Baby,” to her. She blushed furiously, but loved every moment of it. When he finished Dean shook hands with the beaming young husband and returned to the stage.

When he was finished with his act we all applauded, nobody louder or longer than Frank.

“Let’s give him some time before we go backstage,” Frank said.

I knew Frank was curious about how things were going, but he didn’t mention it in front of Joey and Buddy. And I knew he wouldn’t talk about it in front of Dino, either. He’d have to have the patience to wait until he got either me or Sammy alone.

We waited for the Copa Room to empty out and had one more round of drinks.

“You guys gotta let me come on stage with you one night,” Buddy said.

“Where were you an hour ago, Buddy?” Frank asked. “You were up there with us.”

“Just remember,” Joey said, wagging his finger at Buddy, “there’s only room for one comic in this act.”

“Hey,” Buddy said, “you start doin’ some TV and there’ll be room for me, right? Who else would you recommend?”

“I ain’t recommending nobody, pal,” Joey said, “ ’cause I ain’t givin’ up this gig.”

Frank looked at me and rolled his eyes. We both looked at Sammy, who seemed to be staring at something only he could see.

“Hey, Sam,” Frank said, “wake up, baby. It’s party time.”

“I’m ready, Frank,” Sammy said, with a big forced grin. He stubbed out a cigarette and lit another one right away.

“Come on,” Frank said, pushing his chair back, “let’s go back and see Dino.”

“I’ll get the check,” I said, intending to have the Sands comp everybody.

“I already took care of it, pally,” Frank said, slapping me on the shoulder. “Let’s go.”

Backstage was not as wild as it had been when the whole Rat Pack was entertaining, but it still took us a while to work through the crowd to where Dino was holding court.

“Just in time,” he said, putting one arm around Frank and the other around Sammy. “I was goin’ to change. Are we still on for tonight?”

“We sure are,” Frank said. “It’s been a while since we’ve all been together.”

“Too bad Peter’s not here, too,” Sammy said.

“We don’t need Peter,” Frank said. “We got Eddie G.”

I was flattered and figured that Peter’s connection to the Kennedys was keeping him in Washington these days.

I knew that the real late-night swingers in the group were Frank and Sammy, but this was opening night for Dean, so everyone agreed to go out and celebrate.

We waited for Dean to change while the backstage area cleared out. Then when Sammy, Joey and Buddy left to go out front and wait, Frank grabbed my arm. Jerry drifted out with the other three and I knew he was feeling like a fifth-well, seventh-wheel.

“I know it’s Sammy’s business,” Frank said to me, “but I haven’t gotten a chance to get him alone. How’s everything goin’?”

I hesitated, then decided that Sammy probably wouldn’t mind Frank being clued in on some details.

“Not good, Frank.”

I told Frank things didn’t go well the first time I tried to help Sammy, so we were going to take a second shot at it. I didn’t tell him about the photo, or the dead body. And I didn’t tell him anything about Sammy’s gun-which, by the way, Jerry said he’d taken care of.

After we’d landed in Vegas we dropped Sammy at the Sands so he could change, and then we went to my house so we could do the same. When we left the house I asked Jerry if he still had the gun on him. I was nervous about him getting caught carrying it. When he told me he didn’t I was even more worried about it being found in my house.

“Don’t worry,” he said, “somebody would have to find it in more than one place. I broke it down in pieces and sort of … spread it around.”

“Where did you put … You know what? I don’t want to know.”

Frank listened patiently. He knew he wasn’t getting all of it, but in the end he just told me, “Keep tryin’ to help him, Eddie. Sam’s already been through a lot. You know, it ain’t easy bein’ black and Jewish. He takes a lot of crap.”

“Don’t worry, Frank,” I assured him, “I’m doing my best.”

“I know you are, Eddie,” Frank said. “Listen, one other thing. Give big Jerry a pass tonight. I don’t think he’s real comfortable, but I also don’t think he’d say so.”

“I was having the same thought. I’ll go out and talk to him now while you wait for Dean.”

Frank nodded and I left. The Copa Room was empty and men were stacking chairs on top of the tables, so I went outside the front doors and found the guys waiting there. Joey and Buddy were arguing, or pretending to; Sammy’s head rocked left and right, like he was watching a tennis tournament. Jerry was standing off to the side with no expression on his face. I walked over to him.

“Hey, Mr. G.”

“Hey, Jerry,” I said, “you look a little tired.”

“Huh? Oh, I am, sorta-”

“Why don’t you go up and use your room to get some rest?” I asked. “Or go back to the house.”

“I’d hafta take the Caddy-”

“I’ll get a ride,” I assured him. “You don’t have to come out with these bozos if you don’t want to.”

“I was kinda thinkin’ about skippin’ it….”

“Sure, why not?” I said. “I’ll see you later at the house.”

“You sure you’re gonna be okay?”

“These guys’ll be around me all night, and like I said, I’ll get a ride home.”

“Well, okay,” Jerry said, “but you be careful.”

“Go ahead,” I said, slapping him on one big shoulder. “Go home and get some rest.”

“Thanks, Mr. G.,” he said. “You’ll, uh, explain to everybody-”

“Sure, sure,” I said, “just go.”

He looked very pleased at having been given his release-or else he was just looking forward to driving the Caddy again.

I turned and went to see what Joey and Buddy were beefing to each other about.