Chapter 6

TANDY came steamrolling in just as Carmela, Gabby, and Baby were eating salads that had been delivered a few minutes earlier by the French Quarter Deli. Dawn and Byrle had packed up their craft bags and left an hour earlier.

“You poor thing,” said Carmela, jumping up from the craft table to greet Tandy. “Come on back here and tell us what’s going on. You want part of my salad?” she asked as she led Tandy toward the back. “Baby field greens with smoked turkey?”

Gabby and Baby focused looks of concern on Tandy. She seemed tired and distracted. Her usual tight mop of curls was frowsled. Already skinny to begin with, Tandy looked wan bordering on frail.

“Nothing to eat, no, thanks,” said Tandy as she collapsed into the wooden chair Carmela pulled out for her.

Carmela stared pointedly at Tandy. “Things aren’t going well,” she said as she sat down next to her. It was a statement rather than a question.

“You wouldn’t believe it,” said Tandy. “This has turned into the worst possible nightmare.” She leaned across the table and grasped Baby’s hand. “Thank goodness Del agreed to represent Billy. He’s the only bright spot in all of this.”

“He’s happy to help,” Baby told her. “We all are.”

“If there’s anything I can do…” began Gabby.

Tandy flashed Gabby a sad smile. “You’re a sweetheart, but… well, we’re all just in a hold pattern for now. As you might expect, Donny and Lenore are absolutely hysterical.” Donny and Lenore were Billy’s parents, Donny being Tandy’s younger brother.

“What news is there, if any?” Carmela asked, trying to steer Tandy away from the emotionalism of the issue and more toward actual facts.

Tandy leaned back and sighed. “Billy hasn’t been formally charged with anything yet, but the police are completely hung up on those latex gloves.”

“I can’t see where the gloves are all that relevant,” said Carmela. “Especially since Billy and Bartholomew Hayward and whoever else helped out in the back room wore them whenever they were doing furniture stripping or refinishing.”

Tandy grimaced. “There’s another little wrinkle.”

“What’s that?” asked Carmela, her ears perking up.

Tandy shifted uneasily in her chair. “The scissors that were found in Barty Hayward’s neck?”

“Yes?” said Carmela. Come on, Tandy, spit it out.

“The police found a couple flecks of gold paint on them. Similar to the gilding used to touch up frames in Barty’s workshop.”

“Ouch,” said Gabby.

“That’s not so good,” said Baby, commiserating.

“Still,” said Tandy. “The gold paint can be explained. And the scissors could still have come from Bartholomew Hayward’s workshop.”

“Did Billy have any flecks of this gilt paint on his hands?” asked Carmela.

“No,” said Tandy. “Which is why, I suppose, the police are looking at the latex gloves so hard.”

“What possible motive do the police think Billy had?” asked Carmela.

“Oh, honey,” said Tandy, “they’d sooner grill someone to death and figure all that out later. I tell you, it’s a travesty of justice.”

Baby nudged a sharp elbow into Carmela’s side. “Tell Tandy about the heelprint,” she said in a low voice.

“What heelprint?” asked Tandy.

Pulling out her medallion and her printout, Carmela quickly related her story of finding the wayward little medallion in the back alley, noticing the heelprint, then enhancing the heelprint via embossing powder and her computer.

Tandy was stunned. “This is fabulous, Carmela!” She leaned forward and planted a grateful smooch on Carmela’s cheek. “This almost proves there was someone else in the alley that night.”

“No, it doesn’t,” said Carmela.

“Hallelujah,” sang Tandy, grinning ear to ear. “I’m going to tell Billy all about this wonderful Exhibit A.” She smiled over at Baby. “And Del, too. In fact, I see it as a major break in the case!”

“Please don’t tell anyone,” protested Carmela. Holy smokes, we don’t know a thing about this print and Tandy’s already got her hopes up. Maybe I shouldn’t have even told her about it.

“Then I’m going to tell Billy that a star investigator is hot on the trail of the murderer,” said Tandy with great excitement.

“You shouldn’t get your hopes up based on this,” said Carmela. “Even though a few of us have studied the heelprint, we’re still utterly clueless.”

“Hope is the one thing that will see us through this,” said Tandy fervently as she dug in her voluminous leather purse and pulled out a set of keys. “Here,” she said, shoving the keys toward Carmela. “Billy asked me to give you these.”

Slowly Carmela accepted the keys. She knew exactly what they were for. They were the keys to Menagerie Antiques next door. Gulp. What’s all this about?

“Billy said he trusted you,” said Tandy. “You see, there are a couple customers who might stop by to pick up things. Billy thought if you had the keys to the store you could help out. As if you haven’t done enough already!”

“How will I know who these customers are?” asked Carmela with a puzzled expression.

“Oh, you won’t,” said Tandy blithely. “In fact, it’s pretty much a hit-or-miss proposition. But if a customer happens to stop by here, and they’re clutching a receipt in their hot little hand, then you could let them in.” Tandy paused, slightly out of breath. “Could you do that?”

Carmela nodded. “Sure.” She figured it was the least she could do. Barty Hayward hadn’t been a particularly hospitable neighbor, but Billy was always polite and friendly. Plus he was Tandy’s nephew.

Baby reached out and grasped Tandy’s hands. “Come back tomorrow, will you? No sense sitting around and just stewing. We’ll have some fun designing labels.” Baby tried to project an upbeat attitude. “You’ve got all those wonderful jars of strawberry jelly, I always make a gazillion batches of applesauce for the holidays…”

“Carmela makes her special caramel sauce,” said Gabby jumping in, trying to keep the ball rolling.

“What do you say?” prompted Baby. “Are you game?”

“Okay,” said Tandy as she gathered her coat around her. “Why not.”

It wasn’t until after Tandy had left that Carmela remembered several of her customers had been using gilt paint on Saturday night.

They were painting highlights on the edges of party invitations and scrapbook pages, weren’t they? Uh-oh, please don’t tell me it was one of my customers who stabbed Barty Hayward. Especially not… what’s her name?… Dove Duval.


“ARE THOSE FOR THIS SATURDAY?” BABY ASKED Carmela, nodding at the array of colored squares and photo corners spread out on the table. “For the Monsters & Old Masters Ball?”

“They will be if I ever get them done,” Carmela answered.

Monsters & Old Masters was actually a spin-off of the Art Institute’s springtime Blooming Art Ball. During Blooming Art, two dozen pieces of artwork were selected for special display, and the same number of art patrons were tasked with creating floral arrangements that interpreted and complemented the artworks.

One year, Baby had been assigned a Claude Monet painting and she’d created a spectacular display of lilies and hyacinths floating in a Waterford crystal vase.

Because Blooming Art had proven to be a real money maker, and because party-hearty, costume-loving New Orleans folk were already head over heels in love with Halloween, Monsters & Old Masters, the slightly darker cousin to Blooming Art, was spawned.

Of course, the artworks that the museum selected had to remain in keeping with the Halloween theme. Which meant that many of the artworks had a spooky, slightly unsettling edge. Among the pieces selected by the current year’s committee was a painting by American artist Josephus Allan of the Hudson River School, which depicted one of the Salem witch trials. Edward Hopper’s American nostalgia style of art was also represented. And, at the last minute, the committee had added a dark and moody seventeenth-century painting of Roman ruins to the twenty chosen pieces.

The autumnal floral arrangements were equally in keeping with the Halloween theme: flowers in subdued autumn colors, baskets of dried leaves and grains, twisted twigs, grapevines, and branches of bittersweet.

“I’ve been asked to create menu cards as well as descriptive tags for the art and floral pairings,” Carmela explained to Baby. “It’s kind of a fun little project.”

“What’s on the menu?” asked Gabby. She was eagerly looking forward to attending her very first Monsters & Old Masters Ball on Saturday night. Baby and Del, always so generous, had reserved a table for eight and invited Carmela and Ava, Gabby and Stuart, and Tandy and Darwin to join them.

“Let’s see,” said Carmela, consulting the list that had been faxed to her earlier. “Crawfish bisque, citrus salad, roast duck, sweet potato praline casserole, cranberry bread pudding, and lemon bars.”

“To die for,” moaned Gabby. I can’t wait!”

“The Art Institute always could put on a decent spread,” commented Baby. She glanced at the red marbleized card stock on which Carmela had printed out the menu in twelve-point scrolling type. “That looks pretty. Now whatcha gonna do with it?”

Carmela picked up a rubber stamp and, above the headline that read MENU, stamped an image of a woman that had been taken from a seventeenth-century painting.

“First the artsy image,” said Carmela. “Then we’ll add a hint of mystery.” She picked up a second rubber stamp and stamped over the first image, giving the woman an elaborate mask.

“Cute,” said Baby.

“Now I’m going to faux finish these black photo corners using gold, red, and bronze-colored paint.”

“Wow,” said Gabby, suddenly getting interested. “Detail work.”

“Then,” continued Carmela, “I’ll use the photo corners to mount the menu card onto a second and slightly larger card of marbleized brown card stock.”

So intently was Carmela working that she barely heard the bell jingle over the door. Until the noise finally penetrated her consciousness and she looked up to find Jade Ella Hayward staring at her.

“Jade Ella!” Carmela must have jumped a foot. Here was the wife of the deceased Bartholomew Hayward studying her with the faintest of smiles on her face. Dressed in a spiffy poison green suede jacket and black leather slacks, rings sparkling from almost every finger, and her dark hair swooshing about her kohl-rimmed eyes and bright red mouth, Jade Ella had obviously not given a passing thought to looking the part of the grieving widow. She was her usual glam self.

“Carmela,” said Jade Ella, in the clipped manner of speech she was famous for. “Have you seen Billy?”

A shocked silence followed her question. Baby and Gabby stared with open mouths.

Finally Carmela spoke up. “The police are talking to him.”

“They are?” said Jade Ella, blinking, favoring them with a polite yet distant smile.

“Carmela means they’re talking to him,” said Baby, finally finding her voice. “About Barty’s death.”

Only then did Jade Ella seem to react. “You mean to say Billy’s a suspect? Billy Cobb? Barty’s assistant?” She paused, obviously digesting this. “Hmm.”

Gabby, who was still surprised to find Jade Ella acting so chipper, finally stammered out, “I’m sorry for your loss, Jade Ella.”

Jade Ella whirled toward her, eyes blazing. “Don’t be. Barty and I weren’t particularly close. In fact, we weren’t particularly on speaking terms.”

“Have you finalized funeral arrangements?” asked Baby, who was too well bred to be put off by Jade Ella’s blasé attitude.

“At first I thought about having Barty cremated,” said Jade Ella. “That way I could have the thrill of tossing his worthless ashes into a Dumpster behind the Wal-Mart store. But a small contingent of Barty’s friends thought he deserved a slightly more dignified send-off. So, in consideration of those folks, as well as the many loyal customers he’s managed to screw over the years, I’ve opted for a more traditional funeral.” Jade Ella smiled broadly, enjoying her own theatrics. “The whole nine yards, in fact. Fancy-schmancy casket, ordained minister, final interment at Lafayette Cemetery No. 1.” Jade Ella paused, her eyes flashing, silently daring anyone to make a comment. “Ain’t that a kick?”

“It’s very considerate of you,” said Baby. Her patrician eyebrows were cranked up more than a few notches.

“Not really,” said Jade Ella. “I myself, in keeping with my new Spa Diva image, will probably wear a red silk dress and dash off early for a fashionable luncheon at Galatoire’s.” She struck a dramatic pose. “I shall most likely order the trout amandine and a nice glass of Pouilly-Fuissé.”

“You can’t go wrong with Galatoire’s trout amandine,” Baby agreed.

Carmela feigned a cough to stifle her giggle. Count on Baby for the perfect retort.

“Listen, Carmela,” said Jade Ella, “you used to do a lot of label designs, didn’t you?”

Carmela nodded.

“Well, here’s the thing,” said Jade Ella. “I’m seriously thinking of launching my own line of cosmetics, too. I’d start by retailing them at Spa Diva. If that venture goes well, and I have no reason to believe it won’t, I’ll set up a website and maybe even get placement in a few upscale stores.”

Carmela gaped at Jade Ella. Her idea sounded good, but rarely were new products launched with that much ease. And the money needed for private labeling and a marketing launch was enormous. Bordering on astronomical. Jade Ella didn’t have that much money, did she? Or had Bartholomew Hayward carried a lot of insurance?

“Anyway,” said Jade Ella, “I immediately thought of you as the package designer. You have such an artistic flair!”

“Thank you,” said Carmela, doubting the project would ever come to pass.

“We’ll put our heads together real soon,” said Jade Ella, who was already making tracks for the door. “Ta ta.” She waved a hand and a pair of large gold charm bracelets jangled noisily. “See you.”

“I’d say that woman suffers from Mrs. Bling Bling syndrome,” joked Baby after Jade Ella had gone. “Too much gold, too many gemstones. Worn all at once.”

Carmela had to agree with Baby. Jade Ella was pushy beyond belief and always decked out like a show horse. Still, she was a female entrepreneur who had just launched her own business. And even though the add-on cosmetics line seemed awfully pie-in-the-sky, it was no small feat, especially in a city like New Orleans, for a woman to succeed. Carmela did wish Jade Ella well, even if she was put off by her attitude.

“Well, you could’ve knocked me over with a feather when Jade Ella told us about the funeral,” announced Gabby. “How can a woman be so cool, so totally arctic, about her dead husband?”

“Give it a few years,” laughed Baby. “The sanctity of marriage ain’t always so sanctified.” She paused, realizing what she’d said, then assumed a slightly embarrassed look. “Well, some marriages, anyway,” she backpedaled. Baby paused, gathering her thoughts. “Did you know that Jade Ella has been dating Clark Berthume?”

“Seems to me I’ve heard that name mentioned in connection with money,” said Gabby. “Is he one of those fellows with money?”

“Piles of it,” replied Baby. “Old money.”

“That’s the best kind,” agreed Gabby.

“Don’t you remember, honey,” continued Baby, “Clark Berthume runs that new photo gallery over on Toulouse Street? What’s it called?”

“The Click! Gallery,” said Carmela. “Click with an exclamation point at the end.”

“The Click! Gallery,” repeated Gabby. “Sure.”

“I peeked in there a couple weeks ago,” said Carmela.

“They actually have some marvelous photos. Prints by Ansel Adams, Copanigro, and Minor White. Great stuff.”

Truth be known, Shamus had confided to Carmela a few weeks earlier that he’d been angling to get a small show of his own in the back gallery at Click! He’d told Carmela that scoring his own show would finally validate his work. Carmela had told Shamus that his photos were terrific, always had been terrific, and if he wanted real validation, he should go out and earn a paycheck. Shamus had pouted, telling Carmela he felt hurt and grievously injured by her harsh response. Carmela had replied something to the effect of “tough cookies.”

A sharp knock on the back door prompted an immediate look of anguish from Gabby. “I thought you said you were going to keep the back door locked,” she exclaimed.

“I am,” said Carmela. “And please don’t fret over every bump and thump, because it’s probably Ava. She still prefers to pop down the alley,” said Carmela, scurrying to let her in. “Even after what happened.”

“I’ve only got a moment,” said Ava as she burst into the shop, “but I just had to stop and say hi, see what everyone’s up to.”

“Hi, Ava,” called Baby.

Gabby eyed Ava suspiciously. “Have you lost weight?” Ava was dressed in skin-tight blue jeans and a low-cut cashmere sweater with froufrou feathery trim.

“It’s just my long-line bra,” Ava confided. “Holds all the fat and stuff in.”

Gabby peered at Ava’s thin frame. “You sure don’t look like you have all that much to hold in,” she said dubiously.

“Trust me, I do,” said Ava. “Hey, remember that great quote… a woman can never be too rich or too thin?”

“I believe those words have been attributed to the Duchess of Windsor,” offered Baby.

“Really?” said Ava. “Gosh, I thought it was Oprah. She’s always so darned clever. Oh well.” Ava whirled toward Carmela. “Hey girl, we still on for tonight?”

“Anytime after six,” said Carmela as the phone started to ring. Ava was going to come over for dinner, then they were both going to work on projects.

“Carmela,” called Gabby. “Phone.”

“See y’all later,” called Ava, dashing out the front door this time.

“Hello,” said Carmela, taking the phone from Gabby.

“Carmela, you’re going to kill me,” said a tentative voice on the other end of the line.

“Natalie?” asked Carmela. Natalie Chastain was the registrar at the New Orleans Art Institute. “Let me guess,” said Carmela. “You’ve got more changes.”

“Yes, I do,” came Natalie’s anguished reply. “And for that I truly apologize. Problem is, the director still hasn’t finalized his choices.”

“I hope you don’t have menu changes,” said Carmela, alarmed. Yikes. I just printed the darn things.

“No,” said Natalie. “That’s the one thing that seems to be carved in stone, probably because the whole shebang is being catered. But it’s the only thing, I’m afraid. I’m sorry to tell you, Carmela, that we’ve got more changes on the art and floral pairings.” She paused. “Big surprise, huh?” Natalie had called Carmela twice already with changes. And Carmela had long since decided that the smartest thing to do was to leave most of Friday afternoon open. She’d wait and knock out the twenty description cards then, when it would be too late for changes.

“Don’t worry, Natalie,” said Carmela. “I’m set up to do typography at the last minute so you’ve got till maybe… Thursday.” Carmela glanced toward the back of her shop where her new color printer sat hunkered on the counter. Thank goodness, she thought. I can push a button and print out any script, typeface, or hand-lettered font and it still looks like I slaved for hours.

“We’re pulling our hair out over here,” continued Natalie, still sounding desperate. The publicity people… our curators…”

“What seems to be the problem?” asked Carmela, just to be polite.

“One minute a piece is in, the next minute it’s out,” said Natalie in a resigned tone. “We’re in complete chaos.”

“How on earth are people going to get their floral arrangements done if they don’t know which artwork they’re supposed to be keying off?” asked Carmela.

“Good question,” said Natalie. “But you’d be amazed at how forgiving some of our art patrons are. They think Monroe Payne walks on water. Which, when it comes to the rarefied realm of fund-raising and capital campaigns, he probably does.” Monroe Payne was the New Orleans Art Institute’s rather flamboyant director and a veritable pit bull when it came to wresting money from the town’s movers and shakers.

Natalie hesitated. “Besides, not everyone actually creates their own floral arrangement.”

“The shocking truth finally revealed,” laughed Carmela.

“Well, don’t tell anyone,” continued Natalie. “But I think more than a few of our patrons have enlisted Teddy Pendergast at Nature’s Bounty to design floral arrangements for them.” Nature’s Bounty was the premier floral shop in New Orleans. They could always be counted on for hip, thematic, almost Manhattanesque table arrangements. For one of Baby’s summer dinner parties, Nature’s Bounty had created a stunning centerpiece with calla lilies, cattails, and sea grasses sprouting from a giant clump of bright green moss. It had been a huge hit with her guests and subsequently copied by a few other Garden District hostesses.

“Just e-mail me the poop when you have it,” Carmela told Natalie. “And don’t worry, there’s still time.”

“Bless you,” said Natalie.

Hanging up the phone, Carmela glanced toward the front of the store just as the front door opened and a man walked in. Hesitantly. He was in his midthirties and rather nattily attired in a houndstooth blazer and gray slacks.

Carmela decided he had to be from the police. Nobody else in the neighborhood dressed that well. In fact, most of the art and antique dealers shuffled around in worn jackets, hoping the local pickpockets would assume they were poor.

“Can I help you?” Carmela asked, going up to greet her visitor.

The man reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small black leather case. Flipping it open, he showed his ID. But not in an intimidating manner, just a low-key professional way.

Carmela glanced at the ID. “Lieutenant Edgar Babcock. Right. We talked on the phone.”

“Actually we met the other night. Saturday night?” said Lieutenant Babcock. He flashed her a shy smile.

Carmela stared back at him. Tall, lanky, with ginger-colored hair, Lt. Edgar Babcock was not an unattractive man.

“You’ve come to pick up the list,” said Carmela.

Now why am I suddenly acting so stiff and formal? Carmela wondered to herself. Maybe because this guy is, as Ava would say, a bit of a hunk? Too bad Ava didn’t stick around a little longer. She would’ve been intrigued by someone in law enforcement.

Carmela glanced toward the back of the store where everyone was casting surreptitious glances toward the front.

“Uh… wait here a moment, okay?”

“Sure,” said Lieutenant Babcock. He was suddenly busy, looking at the rack of pens and scissors that was just to the right of the front counter.

Carmela was back in a flash with the list. “Here it is,” she said, holding out a sheet of paper.

Lieutenant Babcock accepted the list, folded it into quarters without looking at it, and slid it into the breast pocket of his blazer. “Thanks,” he said.

“You’re welcome,” responded Carmela.

“Do you carry Gemini scissors?” Lieutenant Babcock suddenly asked her.

His question obviously did not come out of the blue.

“No,” Carmela said. “They’re a good scissors when it comes to cutting paper, but the Sure Cuts are better.” She continued staring at him. “Is that the kind you found sunk in Barty Hayward’s neck? The Gemini?”

Lieutenant Babcock smiled at her. “Not necessarily.”

Carmela continued to fix him with a questioning look. I suppose you have to hold back some information,” she said.

“Actually,” said Lieutenant Babcock, “someone close to me is a scrapbooker.”

“Your wife?” Carmela asked, glancing down at his ring finger.

He followed her gaze. “No, I’m not married. It’s my sister. She’s got a birthday coming up and that’s one of the things on her list.”

Carmela smiled at him. “Come back and I’ll help you put together a little scrapbooker’s gift bag,” she told him. “Stencils, rubber stamps, some fun papers maybe.”

“It’s something to consider,” he said.

“Whatever,” she said, wondering if there really was a scrapbooking sister or if Lieutenant Babcock was just a very skillful interrogator.

“Listen,” he said, “I know you gave a statement the other night, but if anything occurs to you, or anything strange happens, give me a call. Okay?”

She nodded.

Lieutenant Babcock pulled open the door, patted his jacket pocket. “Thanks for the list. We’ll get back to you.”

“Great,” said Carmela as the door swung closed on him. Hesitating before she went back to rejoin the group, Carmela considered Edgar Babcock’s words. If anything strange happens…

Anything strange? she thought to herself. Who’s he kidding? This is New Orleans. Everything is strange!

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