A Cat Called Alfie

Chapter Thirty-Six

Claire was disappointed. I think she believed that after the note they’d sent, Karen would be round, thanking them and perhaps inviting them for a cup of tea at the very least. She ranted a bit to Jonathan that the note Karen had sent back, which Claire referred to as a ‘perfunctory’ thank you, was far from satisfactory. So it was lucky that I had my plan. They needed a helping paw and luckily I was here to provide one.

I always thought that happiness was infectious. You know, contagious. I looked at all my families up and down the street, and even further afield, and realized how happy everyone was. Even us cats had nothing to worry about. We were all elated and I knew, if we could reach them then the Snells would catch it from us. We would literally infect them with happiness.

I breakfasted in Claire and Jonathan’s happy house. Claire had let Jonathan give me tinned or fresh fish for days now, so I was pretty lucky. Something told me that when the baby came along they would be a bit distracted and I might not get the same attention, but if they were I had back-up. I refused to have any of my joy stamped on. Not even by Salmon who had taken to staring with hostile eyes at all us cats, although from a safe distance. He really was a coward after all.

He was extra-annoyed because Polly seemed to blame him for digging up her flowers. After my grand gesture, I’d forgotten about the slightly destroyed flower bed but Salmon had been caught lurking by her front garden, so when she jumped to that conclusion it suited me just fine.

‘Alfie, you are probably only going to be gone for a few hours; you’re acting as if this is your big farewell,’ Tiger said, as I went to see her before implementing my plan.

‘I am not. And anyway, if something goes wrong, then you’ll wish you had treated me a bit more fondly.’

‘Alfie, you’re such a drama cat. You yourself said that there was no danger attached to this plan.’

‘I know, but I would like everyone to appreciate what I am going to do.’

‘But we don’t know what it is!’ I could see Tiger was exasperated, so I decided to confide in her and, for once, she actually listened carefully.

‘Alfie, you are mad, after last time,’ Tiger said. She didn’t look every impressed.

‘That’s why it’s so perfect, I’ve got experience in it now. But don’t tell anyone,’ I said. ‘It’s supposed to be a secret.’ Tiger raised her whiskers, shook her head and smiled.

‘You will never change. Be careful, Alfie, and hopefully you’ll get what you want.’

It was afternoon before I headed into Snowball’s house. I told her I would be there and she was in the kitchen waiting for me. She still had no idea what I was planning, so I thought I’d better tell her.

‘Right, I’m going up the tree again,’ I said.

‘Why?’ Snowball asked.

‘Because then your family will go and get my family, they’ll bond over the need to rescue me.’ I was pretty confident with this plan. I had thought it out. My grand gesture hadn’t worked exactly as I planned, but it had given me an idea. I was going to climb the tree again, pretend to be stuck (as this time I would ensure my legs didn’t seize up), and then Snowball would go and get help from our families. I could just picture the scene: that as they all talked about rescuing me, the Snells would realize what a good thing it was to have friends on the street, and whilst they were distracted I’d just climb down again. Of course, they’d all be so happy that I was safe that everyone would be friends. It was foolproof.

‘What if Christopher just gets the ladder again?’ Snowball asked.

‘I thought of that. I’ll go even higher so the grown-ups will have to get involved.’ I remembered that the ladder only reached the branch I was on which wasn’t that high, this time I would climb further.

‘And you think that will work?’

‘Yes, of course. Don’t you?’

‘What about your legs?’

‘You worry too much. Right, wish me luck. And trust me, this will bond them, somehow, it really will.’

‘Good luck. And, Alfie, either you’re mad or a genius; I just hope it’s the latter.’

Snowball followed me to the garden. I looked at the tree, feeling confident. I’d done it before I could it again and this time I was unencumbered by flowers so it would be easier. With confidence I started to climb. I began to enjoy myself. It was early evening and still pleasant; the sun was fairly warm, the sky blue. I saw some birds overhead and listened to them singing as I made my way, branch by branch into the tree.

I easily passed the place where I’d been when Christopher had rescued me and continued further on up. I could feel the wind in my fur as I carried on, brimming with determination with each branch I passed.

After a long, arduous climb I suddenly realized how tired I was, so I stopped to see if I was high enough. I got myself in position on the branch and looked down. ‘Oh my goodness,’ I thought, ‘what has happened?’ Snowball had shrunk — she was tiny! I looked again and saw just how high I was. I felt dizzy as the ground seemed to spin beneath me and I clung onto the branch for dear life. I cried out, but not as part of the plan; it was a cry of genuine terror as fear rushed through my fur. I had never been this high in my life and I was terrified. I thought about getting down, aborting the plan, but I couldn’t move. It was as if I was literally paralysed by fear.

I couldn’t see her face but I could see Snowball heading inside, yelling loudly. Thankfully she soon came out with Karen and Tim. Christopher and Daisy followed them and they all looked up at me. Unfortunately, I couldn’t hear what they were saying; the wind seemed to take their words away and I was truly stuck in every sense of the word as they all stood below, looking up at me.

There was activity on the ground, as Daisy ran out back round the side of the house and disappeared. Making sure my back legs were securely on the branch, I put my paws over my eyes to see if that stopped me feeling sick, but then I couldn’t bear not being able to see. I cemented myself to the branch wondering if I would have to stay here forever; would this be my new home?

After what felt like hours, Polly and Matt appeared in the garden. I fleetingly wondered where Claire and Jonathan were as I saw them all staring up at me, shaking their heads. Matt came to the bottom of the tree and shouted something up, but all I could hear was my name. I miaowed as loudly as I could but I couldn’t be sure he heard me. I wanted to cry. This was not the amazingly straightforward plan I’d thought it was going to be.

No one moved from the garden now and although I couldn’t see much, I did see Tim making a call. Matt was still trying to shout up to me, but the wind kept stealing his words so I couldn’t hear him. I wished I was in his arms right now. Anyone’s arms. I felt sick to my stomach as I huddled and clung on for dear life.

After about half an hour of being stuck to the branch, I heard the sirens from quite far away and instinctively knew what it was. Oh the indignity! My worst fear. Matt and Tim ran round to the front of the house, and after a while they came back with four firemen who looked up at me. I covered my eyes again. I would never live this down and if this didn’t bring my families together then it would be the ultimate humiliation for nothing. They disappeared and then reappeared with a ladder that looked enormous. As they rested it against the tree, they started extending it before one man started climbing. Finally, I found myself face to face with a friendly looking fireman.

‘OK, Alfie, you’re safe now,’ he said, as he reached for me and took me in his arms. He did have to literally peel me off the branch but as soon as I felt his arms around me I started to feel relief. I wouldn’t have to live in the tree after all.

I closed my eyes as we made our way down the ladder. I was still feeling sick. He handed me to Polly who was crying.

‘Thank you for rescuing him,’ she said. ‘Honestly, Alfie, sometimes I wonder about you, you could have fallen,’ she chastised.

‘Can I get you guys a cup of tea?’ Karen offered the firemen.

‘Nah, thanks, love, but we might have to put an actual fire out!’ he laughed. ‘But take care of that cat, he’s my first ever cat rescue,’ the man who’d got me down said. ‘And I’ve been in the brigade for over ten years.’

I had never been so embarrassed in my life.

Polly was still clutching me as we went round to the front of the house. Snowball followed and I could see she looked relieved, although I hadn’t had the chance to talk to her yet.

The first thing I noticed was that the shiny red fire engine had attracted quite a crowd as most of the residents of Edgar Road stood around it — apart from the Goodwins of course, who were probably behind their curtains.

‘My God, are you all right?’ I heard panic in Claire’s voice as she rushed across the street and up to Polly. ‘We just got home and saw the fire engine. Is there a fire?’

‘No, Claire, it was Alfie, he got stuck up a tree in the Snells’ garden,’ Matt explained, still looking shaken up. I felt bad that yet again that I had made my families worry about me but I told myself it was for the greater good. I noticed that my cat friends were also out, watching the goings on hidden beneath bushes. Tiger smiled at me and I tried to smile back, still feeling woozy from my adventure up the tree.

‘He was so high,’ Karen said. ‘Poor little thing, none of us knew what to do so Tim called the fire brigade.’

‘Are you all right?’ Claire took me from Polly and cuddled me. I miaowed and snuggled into her; I was still feeling dizzy actually but so relieved to be out of the tree I almost didn’t mind.

‘Excuse me, it’s Rob,’ a man I recognized from the street said. ‘I’m with the local paper and we’d love to do an article, it’s not often that we get the old cat-up-a-tree story these days.’

Did he really have to rub it in?

The whole street seemed to be buzzing with excitement as I was handed back to the fireman who rescued me and my picture was taken. For the paper! Could this get any worse?

‘Right,’ Jonathan announced to the Snells, after, it seemed, the whole neighbourhood had checked on me, taking the time to introduce themselves to the Snells who seemed shy but happy to shake hands and exchange words. ‘Please come to our house so we can thank you with a drink at least.’ I waited for the Snells to make their excuses but they nodded.

‘That’d be lovely,’ Tim said, to everyone’s surprise, and we all happily made our way to our house.

Polly went to get the children whom she’d left with her neighbour, and I was pleased to see that it was noisy and full in our kitchen, just the way I liked it. Matt and Polly, Claire and Jonathan sat around the table with the Snells, Martha was asleep in her buggy and Henry was playing tiredly with some cars on the floor. Daisy and Christopher seemed animated by the situation and were chatting easily with everyone, and finally Tim decided to open up and tell everyone exactly what was going on. I saw him look at Karen as if asking for permission and she squeezed his hand and smiled.

I wanted to escape and see Snowball but Claire and Polly wouldn’t let me out of their sight so instead, I listened to the familiar story that I had heard from Snowball as I rested. As Tim left no stone unturned, my humans looked horrified as they listened to their tale.

‘It’s terrible, but I wish we’d known,’ Jonathan said. ‘If only to get the Goodwins off your backs.’

‘Yes, mate, sorry, we didn’t handle it very well,’ Tim explained.

‘Yeah but after hearing all you’ve been through, no one can blame you,’ Claire said, giving Karen’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

I was still pretty shaken up from my ordeal, not to mention embarrassed. However, as I saw the happy faces in my kitchen, I tried to remember that I had got what I wanted. Well nearly, anyway.

I heard the cat flap and everyone turned to look as Snowball appeared.

‘Snowball!’ Daisy said. ‘She’s come to see if Alfie’s OK.’ She was gleeful.

Snowball miaowed and came over to my basket. She smiled at me and waved her tail and I knew she was happy as she curled down next to me.

‘My goodness, that’s the cutest thing I have ever seen,’ Polly said.

‘My God, Alfie’s got himself a girlfriend,’ Jonathan stated. Matt and Jonathan high-fived, the others all laughed and started chattering animatedly about us. Claire was pink with delight.

I looked at Snowball, she looked at me in understanding; humans could be so juvenile sometimes but I loved them anyway.