A Cry In The Night

33

For the rest of the night she lay on the couch, listening.

Sometimes she fancied she heard sounds, footsteps, a door closing. Imagination. All of it.

At six o’clock she got up and realized she hadn’t undressed. The printed silk suit she’d planned to wear on the trip was hopelessly wrinkled. No wonder I couldn’t sleep, she thought.

A long, hot shower cleared some of the numbing fatigue. With the heavy bath towel wrapped around her she went into the bedroom and opened the drawer. A faded pair of jeans were there, a pair she used to wear in New York. She put them on and rummaged until she found one of her old sweaters. Erich had wanted her to give everything away. But she’d hung onto a few things. It was important to wear something of her own now, something she’d bought herself. She remembered how badly dressed she’d felt that day she met Erich. She’d been wearing that cheap sweater Kevin gave her and Nana’s gold locket.

She’d come here with that one piece of jewelery of her own and the girls. Now she didn’t have Nana’s locket and Erich had the girls.

Jenny stared at the dark oak floor. Something was shining on it, just outside the closet. She bent down and picked it up. It was a scrap of mink. She yanked open the closet door. The mink coat was half off the hanger. One sleeve drooped raggedly round the hem. What was the matter? Jenny went to adjust it, then pulled back. Her fingers had slid through to the skin beneath the fur at the collar line. Bits of fur clung to her fingers.

The coat had been slashed to ribbons.

At ten o’clock she went over to the office. Clyde was sitting at the large desk, the one Erich always used. “I always base here when Erich is going to be gone for a spell. Makes it easier.” Clyde looked older. The heavy wrinkles around his eyes were more pronounced. She waited for him to explain why he’d been looking up at the house in the middle of the night. But he said nothing.

“How long is Erich planning to be gone?” she asked.

“He didn’t say for sure, Miz Krueger.”

“Clyde, why were you outside the house last night?”

“You saw me?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Then you saw her too?”

“Her?”

Clyde burst out: “Miz Krueger, maybe Rooney ain’t so crazy after all. You know she keeps saying she sees Caroline? Last night I couldn’t sleep. Knowing they still don’t want to let Rooney home more’n a few days at a time, wondering if I’m doing the right thing by her, anyhow I got up. And you know, Miz Krueger, how you can see a piece of the cemetery from our window? Well, I saw something moving there. And I went out.”

Clyde’s face became unnaturally pale. “Miz Krueger, I saw Caroline. Just like Rooney’s been saying. She was walking from the cemetery to the house. I followed her. That hair, that cape she always wore. She went in the back door. I tried it after her but it was locked. I wasn’t carrying my keys.

“I walked around and just waited. In a little while I saw the light go on in the master bedroom, then the light in Erich’s old room. Then she came to the window and looked out and waved at me.”

“Clyde, I was at the window. I waved at you.”

“Oh, Jesus,” Clyde whispered. “Rooney’s been saying she sees Caroline. Tina talks about the lady in the painting. I think I’m following Caroline. Oh, Jesus”- he stared at her, horror in his face-“and all the time, just like Erich said, it’s you we’ve been seeing.”

“It wasn’t me, Clyde,” she protested. “I went upstairs because I heard someone walking around.” She stopped, repelled by the disbelief in his face. She fled back to the house. Was Clyde right? Had she been walking near the graveyard? She’d been dreaming about the baby. And this morning she’d been thinking how much she hated the clothes Erich had bought her. Had she dreamed that too and then slashed the coat? Maybe she hadn’t heard anyone after all. Maybe she’d just been sleepwalking and woke up when she was upstairs.

She was the lady Tina saw, the lady in the painting.

She made coffee, drank it scalding hot. She had not eaten since yesterday morning. She toasted an English muffin, forced herself to nibble on it.

Clyde would tell the doctors that he’d seen the woman he thought was Caroline. He’d say that he followed her to the house and I admitted I waved to him.

Erich would come back and take care of her. She’d sign that statement and Erich would take care of her. For hours she sat at the kitchen table, then went to the desk and got the box of writing paper. Carefully she wrote, trying to remember Erich’s exact words. She’d tell about last night too. She wrote:

And last night I must have been sleepwalking again. Clyde saw me. I walked in from the cemetery. I guess I went to the baby’s grave. I woke up in the bedroom and saw Clyde from the window. I waved to him.

Clyde had been standing out there, standing in the ice-crusted snow.

The snow.

She’d been in her stocking feet. If she’d been outside her feet would have been wet. The boots she’d been planning to wear on the trip were by the couch, still freshly polished. They hadn’t been worn outside.

She might have imagined the draft of cold air, imagined the footsteps, forgotten about sleepwalking. But if she’d been out by the cemetery, her feet would have gotten wet, her stockings would have been stained.

Slowly she tore up the letter, tore it till it scattered in tiny pieces. Dispassionately she watched the pieces scatter around the kitchen. For the first time since Erich had gone, the sense of hopelessness began to lift.

She hadn’t been outside. But Rooney had seen Caroline. Tina had seen her. Clyde had seen her. She, Jenny, had heard her upstairs last night. Caroline had slashed the mink coat. Maybe she was angry with Jenny for causing Erich so much trouble. Maybe she was still upstairs. She had come back.

Jenny got up. “Caroline,” she called. “Caroline.” She could hear her voice getting higher. Maybe Caroline couldn’t hear her. Step by step she ascended the stairs. The master bedroom was empty. She detected the faint scent of pine that was always there. Maybe if she left some pine soap out, Caroline would feel more at home. She reached into the crystal bowl, brought out three small cakes, left them on the pillow.

The attic. Perhaps she was in the attic. That’s where she might have gone last night. “Caroline,” Jenny called, trying to sound coaxing, “don’t be afraid of me. Please come. You have to help me get the girls.”

The attic was nearly dark. She walked up and down it. Caroline’s vanity case with her ticket and appointment book. Where was the rest of her luggage? Why did Caroline keep coming back to this house? She had been so anxious to get away.

“Caroline,” Jenny called softly, “please talk to me.”

The bassinette was in the corner, covered now with a sheet. Jenny walked over to it, touched it tenderly, began to rock it. “My little love,” she whispered. “Oh, little love.”

Something was sliding across the sheet, something slipping toward her hand. A delicate gold chain, a heart-shaped pendant, the filigree workmanship like spun-gold thread, the center diamond that flashed in the dusk.

Jenny closed her hand over Nana’s locket.

“Nana.” Saying the name aloud was like a drenching of cold water. What would Nana think of her, standing here, trying to talk to a dead woman?

The attic seemed intolerably confining. Clasping her hand over the locket she ran downstairs to the second floor, down to the main floor, into the kitchen. I am going mad, she thought. Aghast, she remembered calling Caroline’s name.

Think about what Nana would tell her to do.

Everything looks better over a cup of tea, Jenny. Mechanically she put on the kettle.

What did you eat today, Jen? It’s not good thisbusiness of skipping meals.

She went to the refrigerator, pulled out sandwich makings. A BLT down, she thought, and managed a smile.

As she ate, she tried to picture telling Nana about last night. “Clyde said he saw me but my feet weren’t wet. Could it have been Caroline?”

She could just hear Nana’s reaction. There are no such things as ghosts, Jen. When you’re dead, you’re dead.

Then how did the locket get upstairs?

Find out.

The telephone book was in the drawer under the wall phone. Holding the sandwich, Jenny went over and got it. She flipped the classified section to JEWELRY, BOUGHT AND SOLD. The jeweler to whom she’d sold the locket. She’d circled his ad with Magic Marker.

She dialed the number, asked to speak to the manager. Quickly she explained: “I’m Mrs. Krueger. I sold a locket to you last week. I think I’d like to buy it back.”

“Mrs. Krueger, I wish you’d stop wasting my time. Your husband came in and told me you had no right to sell a family piece. I let him buy it for just what I paid you.”

“My husband!”

“Yes, he came not twenty minutes after you sold it to me.” The line went dead.

Jenny stared into the phone. Erich had suspected her. He had followed her that afternoon, probably in one of the farm vehicles. But how had the locket gotten to the attic?

She went to the desk, got out a pad of lined paper. One hour ago she’d planned to write the statement Erich had demanded. Now there was something else she needed to see in black and white.

She settled at the kitchen table. On the first line she wrote, There are no ghosts. On the second: I could not have been outside last night. One more, she thought. The next line she printed in caps: I AM NOT A VIOLENT PERSON.

Begin at the beginning, she thought. Write everything down. All the trouble began with that first phone call from Kevin…

Clyde did not come near the house. The third day she went into the office. It was the tenth of February. Clyde was on the phone talking to a dealer. She sat watching him. When Erich was around, Clyde tended to fade into the background. With Erich gone, his voice took on a new note of authority. She listened as he arranged the sale of a two-year-old bull for over one hundred thousand dollars.

When he hung up, he looked at her warily. Obviously he was remembering their last conversation.

“Clyde, don’t you have to consult with Erich when you sell a bull for that kind of money?”

“Miz Krueger, when Erich is here, he gets into the business as much as he wants. But the fact is he’s never been much interested in running this farm or the limeworks.”

“I see. Clyde, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. Tell me. Where was Rooney Wednesday night when you thought you saw Caroline?”

“What do you mean, where was Rooney?”

“Just that. I called the hospital and spoke to Dr. Philstrom. He’s the psychiatrist who came in to see me.”

“I know who he is. He’s Rooney’s doctor.”

“That’s right. You didn’t tell me Rooney had an overnight pass on Wednesday night.”

“Wednesday night Rooney was in the hospital.”

“No, she wasn’t. She was staying with Maude Ekers. It was Maude’s birthday. You were supposed to go to a cattle auction and you’d given permission for Maude to pick up Rooney. Rooney thought you were in St. Cloud.”

“I was. I got back home round midnight. I’d forgotten Rooney was going to Maude’s.”

“Clyde, isn’t it possible Rooney slipped out of Maude’s house and was walking around on the farm?”

“No, it ain’t.”

“Clyde, she often walks around at night. You know that. Isn’t it possible you saw her with a blanket wrapped around her, a blanket that might seem like a cape from a distance? Think of Rooney with her hair down.”

“Rooney ain’t worn her hair out of a bun for twenty years, ’cept of course…” He hesitated.

“Except when?”

“’cept at night.”

“Clyde, don’t you see what I’m trying to tell you? Just one more question. Did Erich put a gold locket in the safe or give it to you to put there?”

“He put it in himself. He said you kept mislaying it and didn’t want it lost.”

“Did you tell Rooney that?”

“I might a mentioned it, just to talk, just to pass the time of day.”

“Clyde, Rooney knows the combination of this safe, doesn’t she?”

He frowned, a worried frown. “She might.”

“And she’s home on passes more than you’ve admitted?”

“She’s been home some.”

“And it’s possible she was wandering around here Wednesday night. Clyde, open the safe. Show me my locket.”

Silently he obeyed. His fingers fumbled as he worked the combination. The door swung open. He reached in, pulled out a small strongbox and opened it expectantly. Then he held it up as though hoping that a stronger light would reveal what he was seeking. Finally he said, his voice unnaturally soft, “The locket ain’t here.”

Two nights later, Erich phoned. “Jenny!” There was a sing-song, teasing quality in his voice.

“Erich! Erich!”

“Where are you, Jen?”

“I’m downstairs, on the couch.” She looked at the clock. It was after eleven. She had dozed off.

“Why?”

“It’s lonesome upstairs, Erich.” She wanted to tell him what she suspected about Rooney.

“Jenny.” The anger in his voice bolted her awake. “I want you where you belong in our room, in our bed. I want you to wear the special nightgown. Do you hear me?”

“Erich, please. Tina. Beth. How are they?”

“They’re fine. Read the letter to me.”

“Erich, I found out something. Maybe you’ve been wrong.” Too late she tried to call back the words. “I mean, Erich, maybe we’ve both just not understood…”

“You haven’t written the letter…”

“I started to. But Erich what you think isn’t true. I’m sure of that now.”

The connection broke.

Jenny rang the bell at Maude Ekers’ kitchen door. How many months had it been since she’d been here? Since Maude told her to leave Joe alone?

Maude had been right to worry about Joe.

She was about to ring the bell again when the door opened. Joe was there, a much thinner Joe, the boyish face matured by tired lines around his eyes.

“Joe!”

He held his hands out. Impulsively she grasped them; with a rush of affection she kissed his cheek. “Joe.”

“Jenny, I mean, Mrs. Krueger…” Awkwardly he stood aside to let her pass.

“Is your mother here?”

“She’s working. I’m by myself.”

“I’m just as glad. I have to talk to you. I’ve wanted to talk to you so much but you know…”

“I know, Jenny. I’ve caused you so much trouble. I’d like to go down on my knees for what I said the morning of the accident. I guess everyone thought I was saying that you… well, you’d hurt me. Like I told the sheriff I didn’t mean that at all. I just meant, I thought I was dying and I was worried about telling you I’d seen you that night.”

She took the seat across the kitchen table from him.

“Joe, do you mean you don’t think you saw me that night?”

“Just like I tried to explain to the sheriff and like I told Mr. Krueger last week… there was something always bothering me about that night.”

“Bothering you?”

“It’s the way you move. You’re so graceful, Jenny. You have such a quick, light step, like a deer. Whoever came down the porch that night walked different. It’s hard to explain. And she was sort of leaning forward, so her hair was almost covering her face. You always stand so straight…”

“Joe, do you think you might have seen Rooney wearing my coat that night?”

Joe looked puzzled. “How could that be? The reason I was standing there is because I saw Rooney on the path leading to the house and I didn’t want to bump into her. Rooney was there all right but somebody else got in that car.”

Jenny rubbed her hand over her forehead. These last few days she’d come to believe that Rooney was the key to everything that had happened. Rooney could let herself in and out of the house so silently. Rooney could even have overheard Erich and her talking about Kevin. Rooney could have made the phone call. Rooney knew about the panel between the bedrooms. Everything fit into place if Rooney, wearing her coat, had met Kevin that night.

Then who was wearing that coat? Who had arranged the meeting?

She didn’t know.

But at least Joe had verified that he believed she, Jenny, was not that person.

She got up to go. There was no point in being here when Maude came home. Maude would be horrified. She tried to make herself smile. “Joe, I’m so glad to have seen you. We’ve missed you. It’s good news that you’ll be working for us again.”

“I sure was glad when Mr. Krueger offered me the job. And like I say, I told him what I just told you.”

“What did Erich say?”

“He told me I should keep my mouth shut, that I’d only start trouble raking up that story. And I swore I wouldn’t mention it again to a soul. But of course he never meant I couldn’t tell you.”

She made a business of pulling on her gloves. She mustn’t let him see how shattered she was. Erich had demanded that she sign that statement, saying she got in the car with Kevin, even after Joe told him he was sure someone else was wearing her coat.

She had to think it through.

“Jenny, I guess I had an awful crush on you. I think I made it hard for you with Mr. Krueger.”

“Joe, it’s all right.”

“But I have to tell you. Like I told Maw, it’s just that you’re the kind of person I want to find when I get serious about a girl. I explained that to Maw. She was so worried because she always said my uncle would have had such a different life if it wasn’t for Caroline. But even that’s working out. My uncle hasn’t had a drop since my accident and they’re getting together again.”

“Who’s getting together again?”

“My uncle was keeping company at the time of the accident. When John Krueger told everybody Uncle Josh had been so careless ’cause he was mooning around Caroline, his girl got so upset she broke the engagement. And then my uncle began drinking. But now after all these years, they’re starting to see each other.”

“Joe, who is your uncle seeing?”

“The girl he used to go around with. Woman, now, of course. You know, Jenny. Your housekeeper, Elsa.”