Carol's Mate

Chapter Five

“Your love life is not what we came to discuss,” Mona said later in the meal.

“The reason Thomas and I decided to drop in on you unannounced is to tell you that we‟re stepping down from our position as alphas of the Raven pack.” Carol almost choked on the lemonade she was drinking. “What? Stepping down? But…are you sure Alex is ready? He‟s only a little over thirty.” It was well-known within the pack that Alex was being groomed to take over. Most alphas were older. A lot older. Like in their midforties. “Does Alex know?”

“Yes. Had you come home for Christmas, we‟d have discussed this with you then, when we broke the news to him,” Mona said.

Her own problems forgotten, Carol tried to wrap her mind around this coming change. “But he‟s not mated. How‟s he supposed to deal with everything on his own?” Having lived with the alphas, Carol was well aware of all that was involved in leading the pack.

“That‟s where you come into the picture,” Mona told her.

“Me?” her voice squeaked.

“Yes, you. We‟re making you his second. The elders have already approved our decision,” Mona calmly informed her.

“But…but…” Carol was speechless.

“We‟ll still be around to help and to give counsel, but for all intents and purposes, you and Alex will lead the Raven pack,” Mona continued.

Carol shook her head, completely bewildered. “I don‟t understand. I‟m not an alpha like Alex, only a beta. Don‟t you want someone stronger?”

The alpha spoke. “No. This wasn‟t a sudden decision. He isn‟t the only one we‟ve been grooming for this day. You have a heart for the pack. You proved it when you gave up your dreams of being an ob-gyn and pursued nursing instead because it‟s what the pack needed.”

It was true she‟d wanted to be an obstetrician, but she was still in the medical field. She didn‟t feel that she‟d made a sacrifice, simply traded one degree for another. She would have the best of both worlds. She could give the pack what they needed and still satisfy her desire to deliver healthy babies into the world by training to be a licensed midwife. Since the alphas were working on a deal with the local state university to have the clinic set up as an adjunct training facility, she wouldn‟t have to be away from the pack as long to complete her studies.

“And despite your many disagreements, you and Alex work well together. He won‟t have to worry about you overstepping your boundaries or trying to take the pack away from him,” Mona added.

It was true she and Alex fought a lot, but it was more in the nature of siblings than anything else, not that she‟d admit that to him. He was already too cocky for his own good. It was her duty to knock him down a peg or two whenever the opportunity presented itself, something she relished.

“And you said the elders have already agreed?”

“Yes. Why wouldn‟t they?” Mona asked. “It‟s not like this is a surprise to them.

They‟ve known our intentions since you were young.”

“But I‟m not blood,” Carol argued. Yes, it was traditional that whenever possible, the alphas‟ eldest offspring led the pack after the demise or retirement of the current alphas. Also, in large packs like theirs, it wasn‟t unheard of for the responsibility to be split among siblings, as long as a clear leader was established.

“You‟re the daughter of our heart and in the eyes of the pack, therefore every bit as much our child as Alex, so I‟ll hear no more on that subject, young lady,” the alpha said sternly.

“Yes, sir,” she said, suitably cowed.

Mona reached out and took Carol‟s hand in hers. “Carol, you can do this. We have every confidence in you. We know it; the elders know it; now you need to realize it.”

“What does Alex have to say about all of this?”

“My son wisely stated that he wouldn‟t have anyone else but you as his second.” Thomas‟s pride in both of them was evident.

The waiter returned to the table, which gave Carol time to digest all that had been said. She was going to be the Raven pack‟s second in command, in line to lead if anything happened to Alex. It was a lot to take in, and something she‟d never even dreamed of, let alone considered might happen.

As second, her choice of mate was of paramount importance to the pack, as he would share her position and ranking. Her heart throbbed and she rubbed her chest, but the pain was emotional. The pack would never accept a human male as her mate. Not now. She had to let Mark go.

Everything in her cried out against it, but it had to be done.

“Carol, did you want dessert?” Mona asked.

“No, ma‟am.” From the concerned look Mona shot her, she knew Mona could smell her pain. Before she could misunderstand its cause and think her ungrateful, Carol sighed and said, “I‟d hoped that somehow, someway, Mark and I could be together in spite of our differences, but the pack would never accept him. Not now.”

“Never say never,” the alpha stated cryptically. “If you ladies are ready, we can leave.”

Carol tried to puzzle out what his statement meant the whole way home. Was he saying there was a chance she and Mark could be together? But how? Even if the pack would accept a human as her mate, she was forbidden to reveal to him what she was. Not only that, but Mark had big city dreams. She couldn‟t ask him to follow her to Refuge, where the population was small and the job opportunities few, and she couldn‟t betray the confidence the alpha and elders were placing in her. If that wasn‟t enough, Alex needed her. There was no way she‟d leave him to handle things alone.

They were silent on the drive, each busy with their own thoughts.

When they arrived at the town house, Carol went upstairs to put fresh sheets on the bed in the master room while Tom removed their bags from the vehicle. This wasn‟t the first time her guardians, as well as other members of the pack, had come to visit. It‟s one of the reasons she didn‟t have a roommate. Well, that and the whole being-a-shifter thing.

Once finished, she opened the window in her room and closed the bedroom door, hoping it would lessen some of the smell of sex. Mark‟s scent permeated the room, sending a surge of lust and longing through her. No matter how understanding Mona might seem about her having an “adult” relationship, there was no way she could call Mark over to spend the night. Not while they were here.

Besides, she might as well get used to sleeping alone again since that‟s what she‟d be for the foreseeable future—alone.

She could hear Mona moving around in the kitchen as she fixed their usual after-dinner pot of coffee. The alpha came up the stairs to deposit their bags in the room, and though the two bedrooms were separated by a long hallway that spanned the length of two full-size bathrooms, a hall closet, and the HVAC unit, his nostrils still twitched and the look he shot her showed his displeasure. Carol flushed guiltily and ran down the stairs to join Mona. When the alpha arrived, the conversation picked up where it had left off.

“We‟re not just dumping the pack on your laps,” Mona stated. “Tom and I will be there to assist and offer advice when needed. We simply want them to get used to coming to you.”

“We‟ll ease you and Alex into it,” the alpha added. “Slowly turn more and more of the responsibilities over to you until you‟re running the whole pack. We think that will allow everyone time to adjust to the changes. Besides, with both you and Alex still trying to get established in your respective careers, and the medical clinic we‟re trying to get up and running, there‟s no way you could do all of that and handle the pack too.”

“And then there‟s the fact that neither one of you are mated,” Mona said.

“Which brings us to our next item of discussion,” Thomas said as he settled on the couch with his coffee. “Mark.”

On the oversize ottoman, Carol drew her legs up to her chest in an unconsciously protective movement. “I already know the pack won‟t accept a human as my mate, even if I could tell Mark what I am and he accepted me.”

“At this point, you have no choice but to tell him what you are if he is what we suspect,” Mona told her.

“I don‟t understand,” Carol stated after a few moments of quiet.

“What we‟re about to tell you, while not exactly a secret, has occurred so rarely that most shifters believe it to be a myth.”

“We teach the males about it during the course of their training because frankly, with the growing lack of available mates, they need the small bit of hope it provides. But rarely, if ever, do we mention it to the females, with good reason,” the alpha said.

With each word they spoke, Carol was more and more confused.

“Do you remember what I taught you about mates?” Mona asked.

“That mating is forever, so be very careful in my selection. Find a male that‟s strong, one that will be a good protector and provider for me and my cubs, who will treat me well. Not only do I have to accept him, but for there to be peace and harmony in our household, my wolf must respect him as well. You also stated that if the Creator smiled on me, I‟d find my true mate, my one, and I would recognize him by his scent. We‟d be drawn to each other, and when we mated, it would be like two halves of one soul, separated in eternity, reconnecting here on earth.” Carol had never forgotten those words. In fact, she‟d longed for and prayed to the Creator that she‟d find her other half ever since Mona had told her about it.

“What we didn‟t tell you was that on rare occasions—”

“Extremely rare,” the alpha interjected.

“True mates have been found among humans,” Mona finished.

“A human mate?” Carol‟s forehead wrinkled as she tried to digest this new concept.

“Yes. The historians speak of it, though I‟ve never known it to happen in my lifetime or even my parents‟ time,” the alpha stated.

“But…but…” Bewildered, Carol searched for words. “I thought mating with humans was forbidden.”

“Not forbidden, discouraged,” Mona corrected.

“For good reason. With our increasingly low birthrates and more males than females being born, mating with humans would only speed us toward extinction as a species. However, there are always exceptions to every rule. This is one of them.” The alpha took a sip of his coffee.

Mona drained her cup, leaned across the alpha to set it on the table, and settled back against his side before continuing. “Human true mates are compatible with our species. Let me clarify: a human true mate is only compatible with their shifter mate. Legend says there are certain indicators, signs that will enable a shifter to recognize one. The first one is scent. You stated Mark‟s scent caught your attention, correct?”

Carol slowly nodded. “I smelled him before I saw him.”

“And his scent caught the interest of your beast?”

“Yes.”

“The second marker is that of taste. I‟m going to assume that the kiss you and Mark first shared was a passionate one, involving the mating of tongues. After which, your wolf tried to break free,” Mona continued.

Another slow nod on Carol‟s part.

“The third and final indicator is what we call the mating fever. That‟s the part where you two can‟t keep your hands off each other for any length of time. From the smell of this place, I don‟t have to ask if that part of the legend is true.” Carol felt her face flush and hurried into speech before Mona could speak any more on the subject of sex between her and Mark. “So you‟re saying Mark is my mate?”

“Yes and no,” Mona answered.

Once again Carol was confused.

The alpha took pity on her and explained, “You began the mating process when you marked him. For the bond to become complete, Mark has to accept you as his mate and mark you in return.”

“That‟s why you said I have to reveal to him what I am?” Carol asked.

Mona shook her head. “It‟s part of the reason. The main reason you must do so is because with each exchange of body fluid, your DNA is changing him into a wolf-shifter like us. He has a right to know what‟s happening to him and make an informed decision before it‟s too late. Once done, the process can‟t be reversed.” Carol was floored. If they said anything else, she didn‟t hear it. Her mind was racing. Mark, a shifter? Dear God, she breathed, not sure if she was praying or what. Vaguely she felt Mona rub her cheek with a soft hand and the alpha pat her on top of the head before leaving the room.

How was she supposed to tell Mark? More importantly, how would he react?

Carol felt sick to her stomach. She could only imagine how she‟d feel if someone told her she‟d never be able to shift again. Never feel the wind in her fur or her voice raised in a chorus of howls during a full moon. Never feel the strength of her beast inside or scent the wind and identify with startling accuracy what she smelled.

She loved Mark desperately, but did she love him enough to give up her very identity, what made her who and what she was? She didn‟t know but was very afraid the answer to that question was no. Could she expect Mark to feel any different?

Some undetermined length of time later, Carol rose stiffly from her chair, turned off the lights, and headed upstairs. She could hear the soft sounds of lovemaking coming from the alphas‟ room, and it brought a bittersweet smile to her mouth. She‟d grown up around such loving devotion. First with her parents, and later the alphas. She‟d looked forward to having the same with her mate. Now she knew she never would.

There was no way Mark would ever agree to give up his humanity to be with her. She‟d have to hold on to every moment, every memory they created, and pray that it was enough to sustain her into old age. She‟d never love another the way she loved him. Eventually, hopefully, when enough time had passed and the pain wasn‟t so fresh, she‟d find a male she and her wolf could tolerate. Maybe one who‟d lost his mate as well and was only looking for companionship.

She closed her bedroom door behind her, stripped, curled up on the bed, burying her nose in the mattress that held their combined scents, and allowed herself to grieve.

After a leisurely breakfast, the alphas left around noon to return to Refuge.

Carol got into her car and drove to a nearby state park. She strolled one of the lesser-used wooded paths until she reached a remote area. Testing the air, she assured herself that she was alone before taking off her clothes and hiding them behind a tree. Then she gave over to her wolf and lost herself in the joy of running.

She hunted a few rabbits, squirrels, and raccoons that came out of their dens, more for the fun of the chase than for any desire to eat. Later, she lay on a fallen log near a small, icy stream and basked in the sun. As the sun sank in the west, she slowly made her way back to where she‟d stashed her clothing, shifted, and dressed.

Shivering a bit in the dropping temperatures, she picked up the pace to get her blood pumping since she wasn‟t dressed for the weather. As a shifter, she could tolerate the cold better than humans, but without her fur, even she could feel the cold if not properly attired.

Upon arriving home, she found Mark planted on the stoop of her doorway like he‟d been there for hours and was prepared to linger for several more. She opened the car door, and he was there.

“You didn‟t call,” he growled.

Everything in her came to a boiling point. The feelings she‟d spent the day attempting to outrun erupted in a conflagration of desire based in desperation, and she launched herself at him. Mark caught her midair. Carol fused her mouth to his as she wrapped her arms and legs around him like an anaconda.

Carol didn‟t know how they made it into the house. When she came back to herself, they were on the wooden floor of the foyer. What clothing hadn‟t been ripped to pieces was shoved out of the way.

Mark sprawled on top of her, panting. “Damn, baby, if being around your people makes you respond like this, they need to come more often.” Carol closed her eyes and gently ran her hands over his scalp in a tender caress. “I missed you last night.” Inside, her conscience was screaming, Tell him!

She swallowed hard.

He ran his hand down her side from breast to hip, displacing the few scraps of clothing that remained. “I stayed up late, waiting for your call.”

“I…we sat up late talking.”

He raised his head and looked at her. “Everything all right? You seem disturbed.”

She forced her eyes to open and gave him a smile that was strained around the edges. “A bit. The news they came to give me was…surprising.” Mind-blowing was more like it. “I‟m still trying to process.”

“Bad news?” She could feel waves of concern emanating from him. “No one‟s sick, are they?”

She shook her head. “Nothing like that.” She racked her brain for something she could tell him that was close to the truth without revealing everything. “They announced they‟re retiring, well, stepping down from the organization they run. I wasn‟t expecting it. Not this soon.”

“Oh.”

She could see he was wondering why that particular news would be so upsetting to her. Before he could ask more questions, she told him, “Why are we laying on the floor when we could be upstairs in bed?” Diverted, a sexy grin crossed his face, and he rose to his feet, pulling her up with him. “Now you‟re talking. Go on up. I‟ll get my stuff and lock up. It‟s late. Have you eaten?”

She gave him a smoldering look. “The only thing I want to eat is you.” He groaned, and for a second, she could have sworn his eyes glowed gold. The sight of it made her blood run cold. Mark tugged his jeans up on his hips and cupped his crotch. “I‟ll give you all of this you can handle, as soon as I get into the room.”

She smiled, but her heart clutched in fear. She was remembering the alphas‟

words. “With each exchange of body fluid, your DNA is changing him into a wolf-shifter like us… He has a right to know…before it’s too late.” As she jogged up the stairs, love and her innate sense of fair play and honesty compelled her to tell him the truth, now, before this thing between them went any further. Fear held her back. One more night, she bargained. Let me have one more night with him, and then I‟ll tell him. One night to hold me for the rest of my life.

But one night became two, and two rolled into three. Before she knew it, a week had passed…