Delusions of Grandeur

15

Sparks from the ruined targeting lasers continued to sputter into Tyko Thul’s administrative office. The young Jedi Knights stood frozen in shock after hearing Raynar’s uncle issue orders to the deadly assassin droid.

Perturbed, Tyko tried with little success to step around the metallic hulk of IG-88. “Out of the way, you big clod,” he said as he pushed against the assassin droid’s body core. The droid clanked dutifully sideways to give Raynar’s uncle room to pass.

Tyko strode to the nearest of the wrecked automatic weapons in his office, grimaced, then turned to face Raynar and his friends. “You didn’t need to destroy them all, did you? I specifically calibrated the targeters not to hit anybody,” he said with a huff. “Now the entire defense grid in this room is ruined, and I’ll have to have it replaced.” He heaved a long-suffering sigh. “As if I didn’t have enough to do already.”

“But,” Raynar spluttered, “Uncle Tyko, what’s going on?”

Tyko rolled his eyes. “Isn’t it obvious, my dear boy? I was trying to lure your irresponsible father out of hiding by making it look as if I were in incredible personal peril. I did it for all of us—so we can get everything back to normal working order again. But I see Bornan doesn’t care a whit about me after all.”

IG-88 stomped to the doorway and took up a position guarding the room’s entrance. He held out his powerful upper limbs, high-energy armaments fully extended. Tyko flashed the droid a sidelong glance. “Oh, deactivate your weapons, you halfwitted hunk of antiquated machinery! Can’t you see you’re not intimidating anyone anymore?” Tyko shook his head in disbelief. “Droids! No matter how sophisticated you make them, they still have no sense of propriety.”

“I beg your pardon?” Em Teedee said.

Jaina shushed the little translating droid and turned to Tyko. “We could use some explanations, sir. This whole situation is pretty complicated, and we only came here to help. This isn’t what we expected to find at all.”

Tenel Ka’s muscles tensed as she faced Tyko Thul, her voice gruff. “We believed you were in true danger. We risked much for you on Kuar—yet you say your entire abduction was a mere hoax?”

“I had to make the whole thing look believable, of course,” Raynar’s uncle said with a shrug. “But my droids were very careful.”

Standing by the desktop computer pad, he punched in commands that shut off power to the security systems and stopped the flow of sparks from the broken targeting lasers. “Well, we’ll have to fix that some other time. Come with me. I’m scheduled to check one of the assembly lines. We can discuss this as I go about my business.” With that, Tyko turned and bustled out of the room, his bright robes swirling around him.

The young Jedi Knights followed, still perplexed. The assassin droid stood motionless and threatening, guarding the empty room.

“Well?” Tyko called over his shoulder. “Don’t just stand there, IG-88. Come with us.”

The droid strode after them, metallic feet pounding on the floor.

“I know my brother very well. Unfortunately— and I’m sorry you have to hear this, Raynar—” Tyko said, looking sympathetically at the young man, “your father has always tried to outsmart everyone in negotiations, relying on his wits … and that frequently gets him into trouble. I’m convinced he’s on the run because some scam backfired on him—something too embarrassing to admit. And now he’s simply hiding, without bothering to consider the incredible inconvenience he’s causing the rest of us.”

They stopped at a broad lift platform big enough for all of them to climb aboard. Tyko pushed a button, and the floor suddenly dropped out beneath them as the lift plunged down to the lower manufacturing levels.

“Bornan’s dear wife Aryn is in constant torment,” Tyko went on. “The trading fleet has stopped most of its work, subcontracted their primary merchandising accounts until further notice, and gone on the run from imaginary enemies. Poor Raynar here is worried sick about his father.” He huffed.

“I decided I’d simply had enough of this charade, so I staged my own kidnapping, hoping that I could flush Bornan out. It was perfectly reasonable to suppose that if he thought his own brother was in danger, he would finally come out and set things to rights.” Tyko sighed. “But instead of him coming to find me, you children arrived. Now he’ll never show up.”

The lift stopped, and they entered a tube shuttle that rocketed them to another factory complex. A symphony of industrial noises thundered all around them. Silvery pistons gleamed under harsh lights, whooshing up and down. Jets of superhot steam hissed, while pumps circulated supercold gases through cylinders of bubbling liquids.

Conveyor belts hummed as they hauled sparkling new parts to various assembly stations where meticulous multiarmed droids pieced the components together. Bulky worker droids thumped from one end of the cavernous room to another, using portable repulsorsleds to move completed machinery to the shipping areas.

“My, this is fascinating, isn’t it?” Em Teedee said. “Look at all the activity.”

Raynar’s uncle stopped, distracted by one section of the line where droids were installing dozens of optical sensors like black blisters on a dome-shaped head assembly; farther down the same line, other droid workers attached the head assembly to a mobile torso equipped with small rocket engines. The entire unit was then installed in a self-contained hyperdrive pod.

“This is the production line once used to create the thousands of probe droids Darth Vader commissioned, back when he was hunting down Rebel bases like the one on Hoth,” Tyko said. “Now we’ve retooled the probot apparatus and programming to produce these mapping and surveyor droids. They proved quite useful during the Black Fleet Crisis.

“The New Republic needs an accurate map of the galaxy, so that they won’t be ignorant of lost colonies or uninhabited worlds rich in resources. The best surveys are centuries out of date, and many aren’t up to the standards our modern technology will allow.”

Proudly, Tyko rapped his knuckles on the hemispherical assembly, and spoke to the droids on the construction line. “Good work. Keep it up.” Then he strode away. The droids took no notice of the compliment. IG-88 marched behind them like a bodyguard.

“But what about IG-88?” Jaina said, still more interested in Tyko Thul’s explanations than in his tour. “The whole attack on Kuar? The assassin droids?”

Tyko clasped his hands behind his back and pressed his lips together. “The other assassin droids on IG-88’s commando team were of … recent manufacture. I happened upon some old plans in the assembly facilities here on Mechis III, so I produced an extra dozen or so.”

Raynar sounded indignant. “But it’s illegal to manufacture assassin droids, Uncle Tyko! That was clearly stated in the New Republic charter when they turned this planet over to you. I just read all of those documents, because I was coming to help run this place while you were gone.”

“Well, I suppose it’s illegal … from a certain point of view,” Tyko said, “if you’re strictly literal about it. But they were just for show. All of my new assassin droids had explicit programming to prevent them from harming anyone. Rather disqualifies them as ‘assassin’ droids, wouldn’t you say? Not terribly practical either, except that their other capabilities make them unusually versatile and powerful.”

Tenel Ka’s brows knitted together, and her storm-gray eyes flashed. “So. We were never in actual danger on Kuar?”

“Oh, you were in plenty of danger—but not from my droids,” Tyko said. “The combat arachnids could have sliced you to pieces. I never anticipated those beasts.” Tyko patted the gleaming durasteel arm of IG-88. “In fact, it’s a good thing my droids were there, because I’m not sure you kids could have handled all those ferocious monsters.”

Tenel Ka seemed somewhat mollified to know that at least some of the danger had been genuine.

Jaina looked the assassin droid up and down. “So, IG-88’s just a replica, too? A copy of the original?”

“No, he’s real enough,” Tyko said. “I found him here when I took over Mechis III. This whole planet was such a mess!” He shook his head, and then moved on to inspect another station where motivators were being installed into the torsos of a new series of astromech droids.

“When I got here, all the systems were in a shambles. There was some sort of revolution here, and it took me a long time to uncover all the details. I was astonished to discover that the droids themselves had fostered this rebellion, killing their human masters as part of some grand plan to take over the galaxy. According to the records I was able to reconstruct, IG-88—the real assassin droid— was behind it somehow.

“Apparently, IG-88 had made several copies of himself, which went out to do the bounty-hunting work that made him so famous. Those copies were all destroyed in various escapades. This one, though, the primary one, had developed a scheme to upload his entire electronic consciousness, as it were, into the second Death Star computer core so that he could become the galaxy’s most powerful weapon!”

“Not the best choice,” Jacen said. “We all know what happened to the second Death Star.”

Tyko smiled indulgently at him. “So IG-88 left behind the empty shell of his original body, which I found. I was careful to completely purge its systems, every memory bank. I replaced its central processing core, gave it new programming. This droid is now absolutely loyal to me, but still as capable as the old IG-88.”

After completing the circuit of the manufacturing floor, Tyko took them back to the tube shuttle, which returned them to the main headquarters building.

“Well, well,” Raynar said, his forehead creased with concern as he sorted out the details of Tyko’s plan. “At least you’ve got IG-88 to protect you, if there’s ever a real assault from the people who are after my father.”

Tyko looked skeptically at his nephew. “My dear boy, I’m certain Bornan’s gotten himself into some sort of trouble, but I doubt that there are really people chasing him who intend to harm him,” he said as he led them to the broad lift platform again. “Mark my words—there’s no danger here.”

The lift platform lurched as it shot them skyward again, back up to the administration levels.