Delusions of Grandeur

5

The days on the jungle moon seemed longer and emptier.

Jacen missed Lowbacca. It wasn’t as if the young Wookiee had never gone away before, but this was different—unplanned, an interruption of their normal Jedi training schedule. It also hurt that Lowie had so easily chosen other priorities and left his friends behind.

Jacen felt uncomfortable not knowing exactly when his friend would return to them. He had no logical reason to worry, but the situation was disquieting all the same. His sister had seemed upset as well. She and Lowie had been planning some modifications to Tenel Ka’s ship, the Rock Dragon. But without the ginger-furred Wookiee to assist her, Jaina made excuses to put off the project, even though Jacen, Tenel Ka, Raynar, and even Em Teedee had offered to help. Jacen hoped she would perk up soon and change her mind.

Luckily, the antics of his little gort hatchling often cheered Jacen. “Here, Raynar. You hold her,” he said, handing the long-tailed ball of blue fluff to the other boy.

Raynar pushed back the sleeves of his plain brown Jedi robe. A bit gingerly, but with obvious pleasure, the young man held Nicta in the palm of his hand and stroked her with a forefinger. The little creature wound her tail around the Alderaanian boy’s forearm and trilled happily. Raynar was beginning to show a genuine, though timid, interest in Jacen’s numerous pets.

Nicta chose that moment to leap from Raynar’s palm with her tail still wrapped around his wrist. She dangled upside down, clacking her wide, flat beak. Raynar laughed. “She’ll probably be a good tree climber like Lowie. Too bad he can’t be here to see this. I think he’d enjoy it.”

“Yeah,” Jacen agreed. “I was just thinking the same thing.”

A knock sounded at the door and, without waiting for a reply, his sister popped her head in.

“Hi, Jaina,” Jacen said. “Need us to work on those sublight engines yet?”

She shook her head. “Comm center just received a message from Uncle Luke. Said he’s coming back with a surprise and wants the two of us to meet the Shadow Chaser out on the landing field. No idea what it’s all about.”

“Well, well, well,” Raynar said, standing up and putting Nicta back in her terrarium. He had been careful not to intrude too much on the activities of the other young Jedi Knights. “I’ve got some studying to do back in my room. I’ll catch up with you later.”

Luke Skywalker’s surprise, as it turned out, was a visitor. “Lusa!” Jaina exclaimed. Her mouth opened and closed a few times in amazement as she looked at the beautiful alien girl who stood before her—a Centauriform, with the lower body and four legs of a horse and the upper torso of a humanoid.

Jaina reached out to hug the girl. Just seeing Lusa again brought back a flood of memories of when she, Jacen, their brother Anakin, and the Centaur girl had all been kidnapped by power-hungry Hethrir, nearly ten years before. To increase his own power in the Force, Hethrir had hoped to sacrifice a Force-talented child to a being named Waru near the Crystal Star. Jaina and the centaur girl had formed a bond during their captivity and had helped each other resist Hethrir’s attempts to control them. Though all the children had been rescued, Jaina still had occasional nightmares about the ordeal.

As she pulled back to look at her old friend, though, she saw torment in Lusa’s wide, round eyes. She wondered if their past experience had scarred the Centaur girl more deeply than it had the Solo children.

A bit shyly, Jacen extended his arms to squeeze Lusa’s hands in greeting. “Hey, you’ve … um, changed.” He stumbled a bit over his words. “What’ve you been doing all these years?”

The red-gold Centaur child had grown into a beautiful young woman. The color of her mane and flanks had deepened from a coppery color that nearly matched Tenel Ka’s hair to a rich reddish-brown like polished cinnamon. The dapple markings were gone from her flanks now, and her curly mane fell down her bare torso nearly to her waist. Transparent horns with smooth ridges like carved ice grew through the cinnamon curls on Lusa’s forehead.

“It’s good to see you again,” Jaina said. “Have you come to study at the Jedi academy?”

Luke Skywalker had been watching the reunion with sober interest. Now he spoke up as the Centaur girl shifted uncomfortably from hoof to hoof and flicked her long tail. “Lusa has a lot she wants to tell you, but let’s get her settled first.”

Jaina invited her to join them for the midday meal, and Lusa accepted in a husky voice, her eyes not quite meeting Jaina’s. Then she followed Master Skywalker quietly into the Great Temple, her hooves clopping on the flagstone floor.

At mealtime, Jaina was surprised to find that her uncle had arranged for the young Jedi Knights, as well as Raynar, to eat with him in his private quarters rather than in the large dining hall. She soon understood why.

“Lusa has a painful story to tell us. I felt it might be easier if she started with a very small group,” Luke said. “A group of friends.”

The meal was already on the table, and the companions seated themselves. When Lusa folded her horselike legs beneath her and sat up at the table, her head rose to the same height as Luke’s. After introductions, Tenel Ka immediately offered a toast of friendship to the new arrival, while Raynar stared tongue-tied at the beautiful Centaur girl. Luke scanned the tiny group for a moment, as if searching for Lowie.

Jaina watched her old friend Lusa glance nervously around the table, then look down for several seconds. “Master Skywalker thinks it’s important that you all hear this,” Lusa said. “And I agree.” Her voice, though barely audible at first, carried a husky, mesmerizing quality.

“Ever since we were kidnapped … when we were children”—she looked at Jacen and Jaina— “I’ve had an angry place inside of me. Even when I returned to my family, they never understood that anger. Maybe I didn’t either. As I grew up, I had a hard time making friends, a hard time trusting anyone … until two years ago.

“I met others who knew what it was like to have their lives disrupted, how it felt to be violated. They understood my anger—and shared it. They had dedicated themselves to making life better for the downtrodden of the galaxy. They offered me a place working for justice and fair treatment of nonhuman species. They were fervent and idealistic. And so was I. I admired what they stood for.

“For the first time in many years, I felt accepted and needed. Not only did I have a place where I felt I belonged, but I was doing good for others. With each individual I helped, I saw a pattern emerging. In one way or another, they all had been taken advantage of or harmed by humans … like Hethrir.” She spat the name.

Jaina blinked in surprise, leaving her food untouched. She wasn’t sure what she had expected of Lusa’s story, but it hadn’t been this. The tone reminded her of some of the things Raaba had told Lowie back on Kuar.

“My new friends showed me how human domination had caused our problems. It was so clear, I wondered why I hadn’t seen it before,” Lusa continued. She seemed distant, as if talking in a dream.

Jaina felt her stomach tie itself into a knot, and she exchanged glances with her brother. Certainly Hethrir had been human … but so was Jaina, and so were the people who had rescued the children from him. How could the Centaur girl have blindly accepted such a pernicious generalization about humans? With a sinking heart, Jaina waited to hear what Lusa would say next.

“The more I understood how humans had trampled my species and the other aliens I was helping, the greater responsibilities I was given in our group. Our leader began sending me on covert missions. I saved alien lives, rescued slaves, helped to overthrow tyrants. I knew I was doing good work, and for a good reason.

“Then, about ten days ago, our leader gave me an assignment to wipe the navicomputers of a geological survey ship. Through carelessness and neglect, its crew had destroyed a forest on the planet Kaisa and had caused the extinction of the Buro, a species of ethereally beautiful sentient insects. My job was to make sure that the survey ship’s navicomputer would never again guide its geologists to a new world they could destroy.

“I eagerly took the assignment. I had been so indoctrinated by the group that I cringed at the very sight of the humans whose computer I had been sent to sabotage. But for some reason—maybe because one of the geologists had a daughter who was the same age as you were when I knew you, Jaina … I—”

Lusa’s voice broke, and she paused before going on. “As I watched the geologists boarding their craft, whose computer I had just sabotaged, I realized that after their very first hyperspace jump no one aboard would have any idea where they were. When they emerged from hyperspace it was entirely possible that they would be lost in uncharted territory—or worse yet, that they might come out at the center of a star or at the edge of a black hole. I could be responsible for killing all of them.”

Lusa’s body went rigid, and she shuddered at the memory. “I had never stopped to think exactly what I was willing to do for the cause I believed in. Was I willing to kill? And if so, what must the victim’s crime be to deserve that death? Should I judge each one, or could I trust my leader to judge them for me?” She shuddered again and tossed her mane of glossy cinnamon curls. Her crystal horns glinted in the light.

“I couldn’t go through with it. I stopped the geologists and told them what I had done. I planned to surrender myself to the proper authorities. I was shocked when, instead of hating me. they were grateful. After their navicomputer was repaired, the geologists offered to take me anywhere I needed to go. I went with them to Coruscant. I was afraid to contact the Chief of State of the New Republic—or you—directly, but I recalled that Master Skywalker had suggested that I consider studying at the Jedi academy someday. I sent him an urgent message, and he came to Coruscant to get me.” Lusa fell silent.

Luke Skywalker nodded. “I think Yavin 4 will be a good place for you to recover and to get a sense of perspective, to let your mind heal.”

“You are welcome among us,” Tenel Ka said.

Jaina reached out to touch her friend’s arm. “I’m glad you remembered we’re your friends, Lusa,” she said. “I’m happy you’re here.”

Raynar said in a bemused voice, “I never knew anyone could hate us so much …just because we’re humans.”

Jaina bit her lower lip. A memory tickled at the edges of her mind and she asked, “This group that you were a part of, Lusa—did it have a name?”

The Centaur girl sighed. “A silly, idealistic name. One that sounds like it includes everyone. But that would be a false assumption.” She shook her mane. “We called ourselves the Diversity Alliance.”

Jacen yelped. “Hey, Lowie’s friend Raaba is part of the Diversity Alliance.”

Luke Skywalker looked at them in alarm.

Jaina swallowed hard. “And Lowie left here with her. Alone.”