Funeral for a Friend

29

Curt sat next to Cat on Stride’s sofa and sulked. His mouth was sunk into a permanent frown, and he’d barely said a word since he arrived. His legs were spread wide, showing off bony knees below his loose shorts. His long hair sat on his shoulders, limp and unwashed. With his body slumped, even his tattoos seemed to droop on his skin. He looked like a dog whose owner was away on a month-long vacation.

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?” Cat asked.

“Nothing.”

“It doesn’t look like nothing.”

“I’m fine.”

“Do you want a drink? A beer or something?”

“No.”

“Really? You don’t want a drink, and you expect me to believe nothing’s wrong?”

“Drop it, Kitty Cat.”

Cat sighed loudly. When Curt got into one of his melancholy moods, he didn’t do much more than grunt, and she’d learned over time to keep poking him until he opened up. Ironically, that always seemed to work with Stride, too, although he would have hated the comparison.

Outside, the early evening sky had turned dark, and none of the lights in the cottage were on, making it gloomy inside. Distant thunder rolled continuously, like a plane overhead making endless circles. The century-old walls rattled and shuddered. Cat could see a spatter of rain on the windows, and more was coming. A downpour.

“What’s up with your Eyes on Duluth thing?” she asked. Then she giggled. “You know, the Big Dickes. Your Ferris wheel down in Canal Park.”

“It’s crap,” Curt replied. “All my ideas are crap.”

“Hey, don’t say that. I like the idea. I think it’s cool. You just need to get somebody with megabucks behind it.”

Curt shrugged. “Don’t lie to me. I’m not in the mood.”

“I don’t lie,” Cat told him. “I mean, okay, I lie all the time. But not about this. I really think it’s great.”

“It’s stupid.”

Cat rolled her eyes. “Fine. Okay. Whatever. It’s stupid. If that’s what you want me to say, I’ll say it. Is that the problem? You can’t get anyone to buy your big Ferris wheel?”

Curt didn’t say anything more, and Cat lost patience with his self-pity. She punched him in the shoulder, hard enough to make him flinch.

“Hey, you get that someone tried to kill me today, right?” she snapped, her voice rising. “Somebody unloaded a whole gun at me and Brayden, and he was hit. So how about you grow a pair and realize that I’ve got shit of my own to deal with. It’s not all about you, Curt!”

That got through to him. His head turned slowly, and he focused his sad eyes on her. “Sorry, Kitty Cat. You’re right. Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not okay. I’m seriously freaked.”

“Yeah, I get that.”

“Brayden was bleeding like crazy. I thought he was going to die.”

“Shit. That’s scary.”

Cat glanced at the front door behind her to make sure Brayden was still outside. “We kissed.”

“What?”

“Me and Brayden. We kissed.”

Curt’s eyes widened. “Well, that’s not good.”

“Why not?”

“He works for Stride. Plus, he’s a lot older, right?”

“So what? He’s the same age as you.”

“Yeah, and if anything happened between us, Stride would kick the crap out of me. Assuming I was still alive after Serena got done with me.”

She shrugged. “I don’t care how old he is. I like Brayden. He makes me feel safe. And he’s got this look in his eyes when he watches me, like he understands me. He gets why things are so hard for me. Not many people do.”

“I understand you.”

Cat thought about what to say, because she didn’t want to hurt Curt’s feelings. “No, you don’t. You think you do, but you don’t. I’m not trying to be a jerk, and you know I like you a lot, but you don’t get who I am. You never did.”

“Well, gee, thanks,” he said bitterly.

“I’m sorry. It is what it is. You just can’t relate. Look, it’s not just you. Stride and Serena try, but they don’t get me, either. I don’t know how or why, but Brayden does. We’ve got a connection.”

Curt picked up a paper clip from the coffee table and began playing with it between his fingers. His face still looked unhappy. “For what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure he likes you, too.”

“Really? He said that?”

“No, but he didn’t need to say it out loud. Guys know the look. It’s all over his face. Be careful, because if I can see it, Stride can, too, and he won’t be happy.”

“Thank you for telling me.”

“You’re right about me, you know. I don’t get women at all. I never have. I suck at it.”

“I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad,” Cat said.

“No, you nailed it. I’m a loser. Colly dumped me today.”

Cat’s mouth dropped open in surprise. Not hesitating, she reached out and pulled Curt into a tight hug. She knew this was the kind of blow that would shake him to his shoes. For all of his macho pretenses, Curt was a vulnerable little boy at heart.

“What happened?” Cat asked. “What did she say?”

“She called me this morning. Didn’t even take five minutes. Said we were done.”

“Did she say why?”

“She said it wasn’t working out. She was bored.”

“Bored? Really?” Cat frowned, because Curt was many things, but he was never boring. “Did you do something to upset her? Did you guys have a fight?”

“Nope. As far as I knew, everything was great.”

She hesitated, biting her lip. “Do you think it could be somebody else?”

“I asked her that, and she ducked the question. That sure sounds like somebody else to me.”

“Do you know who it could be?”

“No. It doesn’t matter.”

“Well, I’m really sorry, Curt. Honestly. You guys seemed good together.”

“Yeah, I thought so, too. I mean, I know it hasn’t been long, but I thought we had something. Hell, she really seemed like she was into me. Nine times out of ten, I have to make the first move, but she saw us talking at the spaghetti dinner and came over after. She said she went to school with you. Anyway, we started talking, and a couple of hours later, we were in bed at my place. It was amazing. I thought I’d hit the jackpot. And now we’re over. One month together, and sayonara.”

“Maybe she’s just having a bad day,” Cat said.

“It didn’t sound like it.”

“You should talk to her. Go over to her place.”

“It won’t make any difference.”

“You want me to talk to her? Talk you up?”

Curt shook his head. “No, that’s okay. I think I’m going to head out, actually. Not that I want to bail on you. I mean, I’ll stay if you want me to.”

“It’s okay, Curt. Go.”

“I just need to take a drive or something.”

“I get it. If you need anything, call.”

Cat leaned over and kissed his cheek, and he gave her a weak smile. She hated seeing Curt with his ego deflated, because he took it so hard. The two of them got up and hugged again, and then Cat walked him to the front door with her arm around his waist. They went outside, where Brayden leaned against the railing on the porch and studied his phone. The sky on the horizon was black, and Cat could see stabs of lightning over the bay water. The drizzle got harder.

“See ya, Kitty Cat,” Curt mumbled, heading down the steps into the rain.

“Yeah, bye, Curt.”

She watched him until he got into his car and headed down the Point toward the lift bridge. Even when he was gone, she didn’t move from where she was. The storm rumbled closer, a shroud of dark, bubbled clouds. She was conscious of Brayden standing silently a few feet away. He’d put away his phone and was watching her, but she didn’t look back at him. Without saying anything, she took a seat on one of the white Adirondack chairs, and Brayden sat down beside her. The wind was like a wave blowing up the street, tossing the trees.

“That was a quick visit,” Brayden said eventually.

“Yeah.”

“Everything okay?”

“Sure.”

He squinted at the sky. “This is going to be a bad storm.”

“Uh-huh.”

“I like watching the storms.”

“Me, too.”

They were quiet for a while.

“Are you upset with me?” Brayden asked.

“No.”

“Because you look upset.”

“I’m not.”

“Well, you’re being so talkative, it’s hard to tell.”

Cat ignored his sarcasm. She pulled her knees up on the chair and wrapped her arms around them. Her voice was chilly. “I told Curt that you and I have a connection. I think you know that we do, but you’re running away from it.”

“I have a job to do.”

“Does that mean you have to pretend not to feel anything for me?”

“It does sort of mean that, yes.”

“What about when the job’s done?” Cat asked.

“I’ll cross that bridge later.”

Cat shook her head. “Is it the age thing?”

“Partly. It’s complicated.”

“I don’t know why age is a big deal. I’m young, but you know everything I’ve been through. That grew me up fast.”

“I get that.”

“Is it Stride? Does he scare you that much?”

“I’m not scared of Stride, Cat.”

“Well, you can’t be scared of me.”

“Don’t be so sure,” Brayden told her with a smile. “I think you’d be surprised how many men find you absolutely terrifying.”

“That’s bullshit. Most men just want to have sex with me and then walk away. Is that what you want? Because I’m okay with that.”

Brayden waited to reply until she turned and stared into his blue eyes. “You say things like that a lot, but I don’t think you mean it. That’s not the girl you are. Or who you want to be.”

“You don’t think so? Well, I’m telling you, I’m serious. I am. I’m going to go inside and take a shower now. You can join me if you want, and we can do whatever. It doesn’t have to be anything more than that. It could be just like the kiss. We have sex, and then you pretend it didn’t happen.”

“That’s not what I’m doing.”

“Sure. Right.”

“Look, I’m sorry, Cat. For a lot of things.”

She pushed herself out of the chair and walked over to the railing. Rain dripped down from the roof, and she could feel the vibration of thunder under her feet. “I told Curt that you get me. You understand me. Was I wrong about that?”

Brayden exhaled slowly. He walked over to stand beside her. She could feel him trying to hold up the wall that kept them apart. “No, I don’t think you’re wrong about that. I do understand you. Your mother was killed when you were a little girl. You felt abandoned by her. You felt angry. And you blame yourself for feeling that way, because it’s wrong, and it’s not fair.”

“That’s exactly right.”

“I’m the same way,” Brayden told her. “I was abandoned twice. My birth mother gave me up, and then my adoptive mother died. So yes, I get you, because I’ve been where you are. And it’s true, you and I have a connection, but two halves don’t necessarily make a whole.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means even if we understand each other, even if we share some bad things about our past, that doesn’t mean we’re good together.”

“We might be.”

“No. We’re not. Right now, I have a job to do, and that’s all.”

Cat held back tears. “Fine. Whatever you want. I’m going to take that shower now.”

“I’ll be right here.”

“My offer still stands. No strings.”

“I’m sorry, Cat.”

She left Brayden on the porch, and inside, she felt a rush of emptiness, like morphine numbing her pain. The cottage felt dark and deserted. She went to the bathroom and took off all her clothes, and she shivered as she waited for the trickle of water to heat up. When it finally did, she climbed into the tub and stood under the spray, eyes wide open, staring at the wall, wishing she were someone else. In her head were all of the people who meant something to her. Brayden, and Stride, and Serena, and Curt, and in back of all of them, Michaela.

Michaela. Her mother. Murdered by her father. Michaela existed now only in a couple of photographs from her childhood. Cat couldn’t even call up a memory of her mother’s face. She was gone for good.

Cat wasn’t sure how long she stood under the shower, but eventually, the hot water ran out and turned cold. She shut it off and got out of the tub. She was shivering again, but she didn’t even grab a towel to dry herself. She simply let the cold rattle her body, her knees knocking together. She dripped on the floor until the mat at her feet was soaking wet.

Fresh clothes were in her bedroom. She’d forgotten to bring them with her. Cat went and yanked open the bathroom door, which always stuck.

Then she screamed.

Colleen was standing in front of her.