Funny Money

42 Three Weeks Later

Valentine stood before a full-length mirror, grimacing.

The dressing room’s concrete walls shook. Outside, the Centroplex’s standing-room-only crowd was getting ugly. They were not used to waiting, and Valentine could hear calls for blood, the faithful stomping their feet. His own feet felt frozen to the floor.

The dressing room door opened and shut. Kat edged up beside him, looking worried.

“Tony, you okay?”

No, he wasn’t okay, he was light years from okay, only that didn’t matter. He’d said yes, signed the stupid contracts, let them dress him up like a clown. Ha, ha, only now it didn’t seem so goddamn funny.

“Tony, please say something.”

Valentine kept staring at himself. He did not look right, or even real, his hair done up in a ridiculous bouffant like an Elvis impersonator, his costume a canary yellow sports jacket, yellow pants, and a shimmering yellow tie. First there was Donny the grape, now Tony the banana.

“Tony?”

The dressing room door opened. Donny and Vixen popped their heads in. They were both freaking out.

“They’re rioting out there,” Donny said.

“Come on Tony,” Vixen said, “you can do it.”

Valentine stared at his ridiculous image in the mirror.

“It’s just opening-night jitters,” Kat reassured them. “Give us another minute, okay?”

They left and the dressing room fell silent. Kat got close enough so they were able to share the mirror’s reflection. Her eyes met his in the glass.

“You don’t have to do this,” she said.

“Yes, I do.”

“No, you don’t.”

“But I’ll let you down.”

She kissed him on the cheek. “I can live with it.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

Valentine breathed a sigh of relief. He’d been dreading the thought of stepping into the ring and making a fool of himself in front of ten thousand beer-guzzling lunatics. Dreading the notion of doing something different, for once in his life.

In the mirror he saw sadness in Kat’s eyes and realized she was lying. Lying because she cared more about his feelings than her own. Lying because she loved him.

He slapped her on the ass. Kat jumped an inch off the floor.

“But I want to,” he said.