Gay Propaganda: Russian Love Stories

VOLODYA & DIMA “We haven’t stopped holding hands when we walk down the street.”

Volodya and Dima met a year ago at a support group organized by the Rainbow Association in Moscow. According to Dima, one of the main topics of discussion was coming out. When they met, Volodya, 19 at the time, was a mechanic, a member of the Communist Party, and a student in his second year at the Moscow State Technical University. He worked with unions in the Confederation of Labor of Russia. Dima, 25, came to Moscow from Blagovechshensk to support the Moscow LGBT movement after the attack on a gay club on International Coming Out Day.

DIMA

I had just moved to Moscow and was looking for a place to live and work. I am an automation engineer: I design automated control systems for use in manufacturing or in offices. I didn’t say that I was looking for work at the support group. I didn’t want people to think that I’d come to get help with that. I wanted to do it myself.

Volodya and I hit it off right away. He gave me his phone number and invited me to a seminar for unions. I lost his number, but I came to the event. Volodya came up to me and asked, “Should we get out of here?” I liked that he wanted to separate me from the group, as though we were running away together. We went on a walk. I remember sitting on his lap in the park. Some people walked by and said something to us, but Volodya told me, “Don’t pay attention to them.”

VOLODYA

I noticed Dima right away. I gave him my number and invited him to a seminar that was supposed to happen in two weeks. I came to the event with one goal: to find him. We ran away and went for a walk. First, we wandered around the Garden Ring, then down Tverskaya. We ended up in Petrovsky Park, where Dima kissed me. It was my first real kiss. That was that.

I understood that I needed him. I looked for him everywhere. He’d appear to me. I thought that if I waited too long to see him, he’d definitely disappear. Because of that, I convinced him to move in with me pretty fast. We’ve only gone for more than a day without seeing each other twice all year. We’re very lucky we met. Of course, I get some of the credit; I know how to get what I want.

DIMA

I never thought things could happen this quickly. At first, I wasn’t as serious about our relationship as Volodya. Now, of course, it’s different. I miss him when he has to spend the night somewhere else. I like how Volodya takes care of me. I love to watch how he works. I like the way it feels when he presses against me at night. I love his long hair. He used to wear glasses like Harry Potter.

The first time Volodya’s parents saw me, it was on Skype. They were giving him a hard time for not having a haircut and having gained weight. Suddenly, I appeared, wearing the yellow bathrobe Volodya’s grandmother had given him. They started laughing and said that we were two of a kind.

VOLODYA

Dima is very shy. In the beginning, he didn’t want to show his feelings in public. His shyness is appealing: it makes me want to dote on him.

We sometimes encounter various kinds of homophobia, but it’s not like we’re tormented by it. “Milonov’s law” [on “gay propaganda”] hasn’t affected us much. We haven’t stopped holding hands when we walk down the street. Every last person in the neighborhood knows us.

Some gay couples would find our life strange. We would rather spend the night cuddling, watching TV, or talking about things than go dancing at the gay club. Of course we would like children, but not yet. I’m only twenty. Maybe in ten years.