Gynecocracy

CHAPTER 8

"Well, Julian," said Mademoiselle Hortense, looking at me with eyes full of kindness. "Well, Julian!"

How can I express the coyness, the solicitude, the tenderness with which these two words were uttered? They meant so much after all I had been permitted to learn. I was encouraged to believe that nothing could now be denied to me.

"Oh, Mademoiselle! Oh, Mademoiselle, how I love you! How I thank you!"

"Do you really? Well, you have been very good and you discharged your duty admirably. And now that you know what ladies have under their petticoats, as well as what they can do to you, are you satisfied?"

"Ah, Mademoiselle, alas, no! A bright idea has struck me which I implore you to consent to. I am sure if you would only try it, it would be Paradise."

"You greedy youth! What more can you want?"

"I want-I want you to let me put-put what I-have-got into what you have, where my tongue was; and-perhaps what happened to you and what happened to me on the sofa might occur at once, at one and the same time. And that-that would be ecstasy. Oh, Mademoiselle, do let me!"

"No, Julian, I cannot. The idea is not new; it is as old as the world. That idea brought you and me and every one into existence. It is, I admit, the sole remnant of the joys of Paradise which Adam and Eve left us; but I cannot allow you now-not for years-not under other than entirely altered circumstances. You must be content with what you can have; had I not been fond of you I should not have given you so much.

However much I should like it, I cannot give you that. It might result in-in a baby."

"In a baby?" I shouted in utter surprise. "Do you mean to say that is how babies are made?"

"Yes," she answered, "it is."

For some minutes utter silence fell upon me whilst I considered the rapture it must be to make a baby and to reproduce in a little pink and white crying thing, endowed with life and form, all the exquisite and inexpressible emotions and sensations with which one has been inspired and affected by the woman, to whom they have been communicated in that perfect mode, when beyond one's self and carried away by one's sense of all her charms, of all her loveliness-communicated at the instant of the culmination of passion with all its force.

"Oh, Mademoiselle," I exclaimed, in rapture, "what can be greater happiness, what can be holier, what can be more exquisite than-than-?"

"Than the consummation of love," she suggested, chillingly.

"Love," I exclaimed, "is not immoral."

"Exactly," said Mademoiselle. "But, my dear Julian, you cannot go about begetting babies on every girl who takes your fancy."

How these words desecrated what I held holier than religion.

"Certainly not. I have these feelings, these longings for you alone. It is but to one woman that a man ought so to reveal himself. I should live for you alone and devote myself to you only."

Mademoiselle smiled amusedly. But there was a little incredulity, or perhaps a tincture of contempt, mingled with this smile, which was certainly cynical.

"You must learn the lessons of the world you live in and solve the problems they suggest as you can. I have given you a necessary part of your education and I see you have already derived much benefit from it. In France ladies afford many favours and many harmless privileges, but they draw the line at what you ask for. I shall tease you as much as I like, and when I like, and make you please me frequently; perhaps for the remainder I shall put you into another lady's hands-Lady Ridlington's for example. She is very fond of breaking in amorous youths. But you must be content with what I have allowed you, Julian, as far as I am concerned, and the discipline will be wholesome."

"Oh, Mademoiselle, how cruel!"

"Not so cruel as I should be if I laid you across my knee, turned your petticoats over your head, and smacked your bottom, which must still be sore from your birching, for daring to propose such a thing to me; and yet, if you continue refractory, I shall certainly do so! You must learn self-control-it is the foundation of good breeding. Come! I am going to ring for tea. Put on your bodice, Miss. What is all this," looking reproachfully at me, "on your chemise?"

What Mademoiselle had said and her entrancing manner of saying it, only made me feel worse. The notion of being laid across that lap of hers in the position she had suggested could have no other effect; but the necessity of replying to her question, which I felt to be an awkward one, diverted my attention from the pleasant idea.

"Oh, Mademoiselle, I–I-I swallowed in the first time, and the second, but the third-"

"You spat it out! And yet you have the impudence to profess you love me," retorted Mademoiselle indignantly. "Very well, you shall swallow something not half as nice in my dressing room after tea, for punishment!"

I changed colour, but dared not reply.

Elise then entered with the tea things, and looked at me very curiously. As she went out, looking straight at me, she ominously observed: "Tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that!"

Mademoiselle laughed.

"If it were only!" I ejaculated, much disturbed.

"That is the whole point of it. It will not be I," was all she replied.

Mademoiselle's appetite astonished me, and I thought she gratified it most immorally. She devoured crumpets and muffins, and plum-cake, and bonbons, and cups of delicious fragrant tea. She made me sit near her and follow her example. Her manner towards me was most winning and affectionate, with a strong spice of tantalising coquetry. She even indulged in some little endearments of a peculiarly alluring character. For instance as she sat talking to me she rested her elbow on my lap quite casually, but would not notice the emotions it excited, or the movements and looks it evoked.