Her Silent Cry

Sixty-One

The mobile command tent was abuzz with activity when Josie and Oaks arrived back at the city park. The park lights shone down on the play area, illuminating the law enforcement milling around outside the tent as well as the civilian volunteers Josie had enlisted to help search for Violet Young. She spotted Luke’s bloodhound, Blue, lumbering around the swings, sniffing at the dirt and walked toward him. Josie knelt and called softly to Blue, who recognized her. He walked over to her, his tail wagging, and pressed the length of his body into her waiting hands. She scratched his back, rubbed his sides, and spoke softly to him. Nearby, Luke was talking with a sheriff’s deputy. He smiled when he saw her, said goodbye to the deputy, and came over.

“You’re okay,” Luke said. “Word around here was that you took one to the stomach. Had everyone pretty freaked out till we heard you had your vest on.”

Josie nodded. “A little bruising. That’s all. I wanted to thank you—and Blue—for your help with finding Violet Young.”

Luke smiled and gestured toward Blue. “It was all him. I’m just his ride.”

“Well,” Josie said. “We’re lucky that you were both here.”

“It was the least I could do, especially after what happened at my place. You know, I was going to make you breakfast that day but when I woke, you were gone. I figured you had a big lead to run down.”

Josie’s gaze fell momentarily. She shored herself up and met his eyes again. “I did,” she said. “About that, Luke, what did happen that night?”

His face fell. “You don’t remember?”

“I’m sorry. I—uh—I remember dinner. Then I left and came back, and we drank. A lot. I remember watching television with you. Laughing. Then we woke up in your bed. I need to know—”

“You blacked out?”

Shame colored her face. “Yes. I told you—I hadn’t had anything to drink for months before that. Not that that’s any excuse. I’m so sorry. I don’t remember. But I need to know. If I’m going to move forward with Noah, I have to know the truth.”

Luke looked back at the tent where Josie knew Noah had been all night, working the phones and a laptop because his broken leg kept him out of the field. “Oh, you think we—you think we slept together?”

“We didn’t?” Josie asked. She tried to stem the monster wave of relief that started to crash inside of her, at least until she’d heard everything.

Luke laughed. “No, Josie. We didn’t. Not that I didn’t think about it. I mean you and I—we had some amazing times together—but no, I knew you were hung up on Noah, so I didn’t even try. I told you I wasn’t making a pass.”

“I remember that,” Josie said, cheeks on fire.

“Well, I meant it. We watched television. We laughed our asses off at some comedy special that came on. You said it was a good escape. Then when it was over you started crying.”

“What?” Josie said, a little more forcefully than she anticipated. She wasn’t typically a crier.

“Yeah, you spilled everything about how Noah had pushed you away. How much you loved him.”

“Oh God,” Josie said.

Luke waved a hand in the air. “Don’t be embarrassed. It was sweet. I knew you were being vulnerable because when we were together, you always kept so much of yourself—well, to yourself. So I made some confessions of my own.”

“About what?”

He looked away from her. “I’d really rather not talk about them when I’m sober.”

“Luke, please.”

His eyes found hers again. “Let’s just say that I still have nightmares about everything that happened: my best friend being killed in front of me, me being tortured, spending time in prison. I get… scared. I told you that’s why I had gotten Blue. Because I felt better with him around. That’s why I still live with Carrieann. Because I hate being alone.”

“I’m sorry,” Josie said.

“You went to sleep in my bed and a couple of hours later, I got in. I just… I was having a lot of anxiety. It made me feel better to be close to you. Real manly, I know.”

“Oh, Luke. I understand. Believe me, I do.” Josie looked down at Blue who had now taken up position at Luke’s feet. “But Luke, Blue was outside the bedroom door. When I woke up, his dog bed was empty, and he was outside the door.”

“Against it, right?”

“Well, yeah. I almost tripped over him. I wondered if you put him out there because we were—you know.”

Again, Luke laughed. He reached down and patted Blue’s head. “Blue can open doors, remember?”

That Josie did remember.

“That door to my bedroom tends to swing shut on its own if it’s not propped open,” Luke added.

They both turned when they heard the sound of someone calling Josie’s name. Noah stood at the mouth of the tent on his crutches. He balanced on them and lifted one hand to wave her over.

Luke went on, “Sometimes, when I am having a really bad night, he sleeps outside the door, pressed against it. That way no one can get to me without getting past him first. I didn’t teach him that. He just figured it out. That’s what makes him so special.”

Josie smiled at Blue. “Oh, there are a lot of things that make him special,” she said. “Stick around, would you? We might need your help finding Lucy still.”

Luke looked from her to Noah and back again. “Go,” he said. “That’s where you should be.”

As she walked toward the tent, and Noah, she looked over her shoulder at Luke one last time. “Thank you, Luke.”