I could handle giving her an orgasm, but not waking up to her all sleepy and soft. She'd been wrapped around me like a vine, curled into my side with a leg thrown across my own, her breasts against my chest, her face tucked into my neck. I tucked that feeling away, too, and pulled away from the embrace and the longing that it stirred.
I wanted nothing more than to stir her from sleep with a repeat from the night before, but that would lead us both down a road that I wasn't sure we could come back from.
I was eating a pitiful excuse for a breakfast, runny, cold eggs and piss-poor coffee when she slipped into the galley kitchen in her meet-the-parents clothes. She was hesitant as she came closer, she looked almost hopeful.
The shame and regret twisted painfully in my chest when she smiled up at me, her cheeks flush with a burn from my beard. For the first time since I met her she seemed happy and it fucking pissed me off that I allowed myself to even get close to her to care about her goddamn feelings.
She fidgeted with the hem of her dress as I made her a cup of coffee and a plate of shitty food.
"Are you packed? Embassy opens at zero seven hundred and we want to get you there ASAP."
Confusion muddled her face and though I wanted to sidle up to her and tuck her into the comfort of my arm, I resisted. "Yeah, I've got everything. How do I look?"
Her face glowed, as it had last night. All I wanted in that moment was to drag her back to our room and take back my promise not to fuck her. Instead I frowned. “You look fine. Kyle and Vic will wait outside and I’ll walk you in. Once I’m sure you’re in safe hands, I’ll go.”
She blinked back tears, though I ignored them. I tried to pretend they were tears of excitement, but I could tell by her white pallor and tense stance that she was petrified.
She ate her breakfast in silence and I was both thankful and angry about every fucking thing. She finished and threw away the soggy paper plate, her shoulders slumped in defeat.
“Let’s go.”
I took her hand and led her off the boat and dock. Vic and Kyle carried our luggage to the car. Annie and I sat on a bench outside the parking lot. Her eyes darted around, staring at the people heading to the dock. One couple looked right at us and Annie’s gaze lowered to the ground almost instantly. She tapped her foot and clutched my arm, almost leaving marks.
She turned to me. “About last night, I wanted to apologize—”
I cut her off. “Don’t. It's done. I'm glad you enjoyed it."
“Will you come see me when you return from deployment? I really would like to see you again. I think we have a connection.”
Man, I didn’t need this. After all I’d done for her, she was putting this guilt on me. “Annie, I don’t think that’s a good idea. We’ll be bonded together forever because of this. But that’s all there is. A memory. You’re confusing your gratitude for your freedom with your feelings toward me. You don’t know me. And I don’t really know you, either. We have nothing in common. It was what it was. Once you’re back home, you’ll get back with your rich, surfer boyfriend that keeps telling the press how much he misses you, and you’ll forget I exist.”
“That’s impossible. And I doubt that Chris has stayed faithful all these years. I’m sure he has a ton of girls. I’m not the same person I was when I left. No one has ever done anything for me like you have. I need you. I won’t be able to forget you.”
“Well, you’re going to have to. I’m not the man you think I am.”
Kyle pulled the car around with Vic in the passenger seat.
I opened the door for her and she squeezed inside. I sat next to her and held her hand. I didn’t want to be a dick to her; I just didn’t want to give her any hope that there was a future for us. Because there wasn’t.
As we drove away from the ocean, I looked out back at the dock. Despite the horrors Annie had endured on this island, I couldn’t help but marvel at the beauty of the ocean, as the majestic sunrise welcomed us. But this tropical paradise would always be marred by what had happened to Annie.
Our car approached the embassy. Annie had chill bumps on her arms, and I put my arm around her to comfort her.
I helped Annie out of the car. Vic and Kyle both emerged to say goodbye.
“Thank you both for everything: meds, making me laugh. I hope I’ll see you guys again.”
Vic gave her a hug. “Good luck, sweetheart.”
Kyle also embraced her. “Of course we’ll see you again. You’re Pat’s girl. I’m counting on hooking up with all your hottie friends.”
Her mouth spread into a smile. “They’ll love you.”
I leveled Kyle with my eyes. I’d deal with him later.
“You guys stay here. I’ll take her inside.”
We walked up the stairs of the embassy, Annie holding on to my arm. A United States Marine guarded the door and gave us an intense stare. After we entered, I took her over to the consular general’s office; walk-ins were only accepted Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, nine a.m. to eleven a.m. It was too risky to make an appointment; I wanted to make sure we were first in line.
“Can’t you come inside with me? Just for a bit?” I could feel Annie shake.
There couldn’t be any ambiguity. I had to cut the ties. “Nope. You need to go by yourself. I'm not coming with you.”
“But I need you. Please, I’m sure the Navy would give you leave? My daddy could get you a job and—”
“Stop. We're not going to do this." My head pounded. I had to get it over with. Set her free so she could move on. “This is it, Annie. It’s over. I can't ever see you again. I rescued you, detoxed you. You’re nothing more than a job to me. The job is done. This is done. I don’t owe you anything. Just let it go."
Tears fell down her face and she let out a whimper.
My chest tightened. I fucking hated myself for being such an asshole. But I had to do this. For her. For me. We both had to move on.
I nudged Annie into the room, then walked away and stood outside the door. Annie looked back at me and then walked up to the window. The lady seemed to ask her some questions, then came out from behind the cubicle and gave Annie a hug. I gave a final glance back and could see the secretary entering the consular’s office, holding Annie’s hand. Annie was safe. I’d done my job and completed my mission. It was time to get back to my men.
I raced down the steps of the embassy and jumped into the awaiting car. “Go.”
Kyle sped away.
Maybe I shouldn’t have been so harsh. I could’ve kissed her goodbye, told her it was going to be okay, that I cared about her.
“You okay?” Vic offered.
“Yup. Never better,” I lied.
I wondered what Annie was doing at that moment. Had she finally called her parents? Heard their voices? Like an investigative news reporter, I wanted to know every detail. But that was her story. My involvement in her life was over. And now it was time for me to get back to my life. I’d done my job, earned my trident.
“The only easy day was yesterday.”