Jade Lady burning

2

Life in the Army isn’t anything like what most people think. Especially when you’re stationed on Yongsan Compound, the headquarters of the Eighth United States Army.

First of all, we don’t stand any formations. In the CID you’re not even issued rifles, only. 45s, which we could check out of the arms room when we felt like it, which in my case was never. And we don’t wear uniforms. Of course the CID, the Criminal Investigation Division, never did, no matter where you were stationed. You always wore a coat and tie. The civilian clothes were supposed to help you blend into the civilian population. That probably made some sense in the 1930s and ’40s, when everybody who could afford it wore a suit. But nowadays the only people who wear suits are either getting married, on their way to a funeral, or they work for the U.S. Army Criminal Investigation Division.

Our rank was classified. So if young buck sergeants, like me and Ernie, had to investigate a full-bird colonel, we wouldn’t be intimidated. That’s another one of those things that don’t really work in practice. After you’ve worked at Eighth Army Headquarters for a while, everybody knows you. And the colonels have this habit of protecting themselves and their fellow officers. In that order. Of course, the generals don’t have to worry about anything. They’re just one step below God.

People also have this idea of some sort of sad sack existence. I haven’t touched a mop since I left the States. We got houseboys. Every night I throw my dirty clothes on the floor, in the same spot, and in the morning after I shower and shave I put on the clean clothers that were laid out for me the day before. About an hour before I leave for work, my houseboy shows up and brings my footgear to a high spitshine. When I get back to my room, usually at lunch or in the late afternoon, the place is clean, the bed is made, and my work clothes for the next day are hanging in front of my wall locker.

I never call Mr. Yi a houseboy to his face. He would consider that insulting, especially since he’s about a quarter-century older than me. And I don’t call him Ajosi-“Uncle”-which would be the normal form of address for a younger man to his elder. I call him Mr. Yi. The Western way. To Koreans it sounds neat and clean-businesslike-and doesn’t get us involved in their complex hierarchical relationships.

Koreans use different forms of address, and different verb endings, depending on what your relative status is to the person you are talking to. Status that is defined not by money but by the writings of Confucius. Don’t even try to get me to explain it to you. They say that, because of these status considerations, a foreigner can study for years and still never learn how to speak Korean properly. I’ve been trying-and I communicate-but I know they make a lot of allowances for me that wouldn’t apply if I didn’t have a Caucasian face.

In the mornings we hit the Yongsan Snack Bar, which I love. I love the shuffling feet, the tinkling porcelain cups and silverware, the incoherent mumblings, and the crinkling of newspapers being opened. Ernie and I never miss the morning edition of the Pacific Stars amp; Stripes. They fly it in from Tokyo. Unless there’s a typhoon or something, they airlift it all over the Pacific: Vietnam, Thailand, the Philippines, Hong Kong, Okinawa, and of course to Korea. It’s a real rag, with William F Buckley, Jr. on the right and Art Buchwald on the left. So much for socialist leanings. But it’s good for a laugh and without my copy of the Stripes and a nasal-cleansing cup of Snack Bar coffee, I just don’t feel right in the mornings.

For lunch we go over to the Lower Four Club and order the special, which usually runs under a buck and a half but sometimes they go hog-wild and put a bunch of beef on the plate and try to charge a dollar ninety-five-ice tea, rolls, and salad included.

My favorite waitress over there is Miss Lee. Everybody tries to tell me she’s a little sweet on me but she’s sort of old-I’ve heard thirty-and so I’ve never tried to get her alone. We call her the Titless Wonder, but her can is really great and she’s very pretty and tiny. Not petite. Tiny. Since I’m six foot four, two hundred and twenty pounds, I’m sure we would make a heck of a couple.

If you don’t want the special, you can drink your lunch in the cocktail lounge and watch the go-go girls or the stripper or whatever the club manager might have arranged for the noontime entertainment.

A lot of guys don’t get out much. Their Korean wives keep them at home after working hours and so lunchtime for them is their chance to kick out the jams and have a little fun. At Eighth Army Headquarters, beery breath always reminds me of afternoons. At night we hit the ville.

More often than not I run the ville with Ernie. We’ve gotten used to each other.

Ernie keeps his body pretty well saturated with liquor. He says it’s better than heroin. Besides, heroin is virtually impossible to get in Korea-not like Vietnam. And liquor is not only accepted but embraced by the U.S. Army.

Me, I’ve always been afraid to try any of the hard drugs. Marijuana, speed, a little acid once or twice, okay, but I doubt that I’d have the willpower to put down heroin like Ernie did.

I really admire him.

We call his girlfriend “the Nurse.” She’s a stout but shapely young Korean woman who dropped out of nursing school and now takes care of Ernie full time. When he shows up at their hooch, that is. They’ve had some pretty hellacious fights about him staying out all night. He always claims it’s an investigation, but she knows better.

Ernie enjoys the fights. Even the time she dropped their big folding Styrofoam mattress into the public well near their hooch. Ernie just heaved it out and took it, dripping, in a cab back to the compound. Later, after getting a few stitches in his hand from the butcher knife she took to him, he moved back into her hooch. But he kept the mattress in his barracks. Prudent guy, that Ernie.

When they’re not fighting they spend a lot of time talking about injections. It’s Ernie’s favorite word. The Nurse meticulously explains all the preparations necessary for giving an injection, even mimicking the hand movements, and then performs the act, keeping her face stonily serious, while Ernie watches the imaginary needle pop in his arm.

Every couple has to have a hobby.

Lately Ernie’s been seeing a lot of Miss So. She’s got long straight black hair and a serious expression-he’s got a thing for serious expressions. But one thing she has all over the Nurse is that she wears glasses.

Ernie wears glasses. Round, wire-rimmed jobs with thick lenses, and girls who wear glasses just about drive him mad. Miss So seems to have injected herself into his soul.

She’s one of those chicks who hang around Itaewon, wearing the latest stateside outfits, because she’s fascinated by the American Gls. She’s been watching American movies for so long and listening to the music and studying English in school that she’s got some sort of idea that all the wise, punk-ass, jitterbugging GIs hanging around the ville are actually worth a damn.

Anyway, she’s not a professional so she has to watch herself. Mainly she hangs out in the rock-and-roll clubs where fewer straight business girls work and a few more of the strays wander in from time to time. Her running partner is her sister, who’s a year or two younger than she is, taller, doesn’t wear glasses, and doesn’t look anything like her.

Ernie tried to set me up with her once but it didn’t work out. I think I’m too serious for her. She likes guys who are bubbling over with enthusiasm and can barely contain themselves over something indecipherable, like maybe just being alive. I get enthusiastic about books and things, or a particularly knotty investigation, or just getting laid.

Definitely not her type.

Not that I hold any grudges. There are plenty of other girls in Itaewon. Like Miss Oh, the cocktail waitress who works at the King Club.

She was a big help to me on my last investigation, after she got tired of bonging me on the head with her cocktail tray. She’s tall, slender, with flowing black hair, and a figure than can make grown men cry. At least she’s brought me to tears a couple of times.

I try not to push her too hard. I know she’s got something going with one or two of the guys who run the local Club Owners’ Association here. Got to pay her dues. So I just see her occasionally, when we both have time. If I wander into the King Club, have a drink, and she’s a little brusque with me, I get the message. If she lingers at my table and asks me to buy her a drink, then I know I’m in. But Miss Oh would have to wait until at least nightfall.

There would be nothing for us until then so Ernie and I decided to take advantage of the first sergeant’s loose reins. Ernie went over to South Post to do some jogging, and I rolled up my gi and made it to the twelve o’clock tae kwon do class.

Mr. Chong, our instructor, had been holding classes at the main gym on Yongsan Compound for the last couple of years, ever since he’d won the Korean national title in the tae kwon do middleweight division.

It’s the most competitive division, mainly because almost everyone in the country is a middleweight. He’s a calm man, with a sculpted body, extremely precise in his movements, and as quick as a cobra when he wants to be.

I’d no more want to meet him in a dark alley than walk through an impact area during a Second Infantry Division field exercise.

“You’re late again, George.”

We were in the locker room, changing into our white outfits.

“Yes, I’m sorry. They had me working.”

Mr. Chong finished tying his long black belt around his trim waist and walked over to me slowly, shuffling his plastic slippers.

“You could be a very good student, one of my best, if you’d only work harder.”

“1 will try,” I said. “It’s this job…”

The worst part about every tae kwon do workout is the stretching exercises at the beginning. My skeleton had set into a brittle knot years before I ever thought about taking up this stuff, and to get my head to my knees or my ankles behind my neck was perfect torture.

We had a couple of American girls in the class, mainly there to ogle Mr. Chong, and they went through the stretching exercises like eels through a net.

Later, when we finally got back on our feet and into the endless repetitions of our kicking and punching routines, I felt a lot better; the sweat flowing, air coming hard. And then the solid feeling of knuckle and instep smacking against the swinging heavy bag.

It was during the free fighting that Mr. Chong always got me.

“You defend yourself too much, George. You must open up. You must attack.”

That was difficult for me to do since I’d always thought that the best offense was a good defense. And I was about twice the size of most of the people in the class. How can you open up when you don’t really intend to hurt anyone?

After the cool-down exercises, more stretching and bending, we bowed to Mr. Chong, in unison, and were dismissed. I walked over to the weight room and, still in my gi, pumped iron for a couple of hours.

In the sauna room I thought about Miss Pak and her short career.

A lot of GIs, especially those just in from the States, are always hung up on whether a girl is a professional or not. As if there’s some sort of clear-cut, fluorescent line between a person who is evil and one who isn’t. I’ve done enough things in my life to be ashamed of that I don’t have much problem with a girl who lives alone in a drafty hovel, works for a salary of thirty dollars a month, sees a couple of boyfriends, and then asks me for a few bucks the morning after.

I’m a Gl. I clear almost five hundred dollars-cash-a month. And I’ve got a free place to live and free food to eat. Not to mention medical care if I get sick. I’m like a millionaire compared to Miss Oh.

To be honest, there are some totally straight girls around, ones who aren’t as desperate as Miss Oh. It’s sort of hard for a G1 to meet then, though, especially if you’re like me and Ernie and spend all of your free time in the village of Itaewon.

I did once.

Ernie and I were pulling security, along with about eight thousand other guys for some big mucketymuck from the U.S. government who was visiting the Israeli Embassy in Seoul. Ernie was driving a big unmarked sedan and I rode shotgun. We spotted her leaving the embassy, walking towards the bus stop, so we slowed down and offered her a ride. At first she didn’t understand me but then I spoke Korean to her and everything was all right.

I took her to lunch at the Naija R amp;R Center downtown and then on a date where we walked through Duksoo Palace, and one afternoon I even went home and met her oldest sister. I don’t know what came over me. Just going along out of curiosity, I guess. Anyway, I took her to the Frontier Club after that on Yongsan South Post, let her listen to the live band, and bought her a Brandy Alexander. We spent the night together in a little yoguan I know in Samgakji. It was the first night she ever spent with a man.

I saw her a couple of times after that but then I got tired of it and I stood her up once and then I wouldn’t return her calls. Her brother-in-law, a Korean man of about forty, called me and in faltering English told me I couldn’t do that to her. I was hung over, in a bad mood, and I told him to go screw himself.

I’ve never seen her again. I’d be afraid to now. It’s things like that that have piled up in my life, that keep me aware that I’m no better than Miss Oh or any of the girls in Itaewon like her.

However, I’m not completely nonjudgmental and there is one thing I’m sure of-I’m better than that son of a bitch who did Miss Pak Ok-suk.