Promises

CHAPTER 18

ANYBODY who’s grown up in Colorado can tell you that there’s one day of the year when we’re guaranteed to have bad weather: Halloween. It looked like this year would be no exception. It was damp outside and had just dropped below freezing when Brian called me the evening of October thirtieth.

“Jared!” He sounded frantic. “Lizzy’s water broke. Get to the hospital! Now!”

Once I found my way to the maternity section, I paced outside the door of her room for a few minutes. I wasn’t sure if I should knock or just go in. I didn’t know if things were just starting, or if she was actually pushing. Would she have her feet up in stirrups? Would there be blood everywhere? I had exactly zero experience with childbirth and had no idea what to expect.

I eventually caught one of the nurses as she went into the room and asked her to tell Brian that I was waiting outside. It must have been all of half a second later when he came flying out of the room.

“What the hell are you doing out here? Get in there!” He was obviously freaking out. I had never seen him look so frazzled. His hair was sticking every which way, and his eyes were huge.

“Has she had the baby?”

“No! But she’s going to start pushing soon, and she wants you in there!”

“What?” I was having horrific mental images of Lizzy in stirrups, parts of her body neither of us wanted me to see, and lots of blood. “No! I can’t be in there while she’s having the baby!”

Brian grabbed the front of my shirt and got in my face like he hadn’t done since we were both teenagers. He was really shaken up. “Lizzy wants you in there. And if that’s what she wants, then that’s what she gets, even if I have to kick your ass and drag you in there by the hair to get it! Understand?”

“Okay! Brian, settle down. I’m coming.”

So Brian stood on one side and I stood on the other, holding Lizzy’s hand while she pushed. It went on for more than an hour, and poor Lizzy was a mess by the end. I had never been so happy to be male.

Finally, the doctor stuck something on the baby’s head that looked suspiciously like a funnel. Lizzy gave one last push, the doctor pulled, and the baby was free. A boy. He was bald and pink and wrinkly, his head was shaped like the funnel, and he had an angry red triangle right above the bridge of his nose. I was horrified, but Lizzy assured me all of that would pass.

“We’re naming him James Henry,” she told me proudly. James, my middle name, and Henry, my dad’s name. I kissed her on the forehead.

Brian brought him over and started to pass him to me.

“What are you doing? I can’t hold him! What if I hurt him?”

He laughed at me. “Better get used to it, little brother. Lizzy told me about the weekly date nights you promised us.”

“You mean the weekly date nights she coerced me into?”

But once he was in my arms, I saw that he really was beautiful. And precious. And the horrible tightness that had held my heart since Matt left eased just a tiny bit.

I laughed out loud. “I’m an uncle!”

THE first Tuesday in November, seven different kids were around my dining room table when there was a knock on the door. Matt was the only person who didn’t ring the doorbell, and I tried to beat back the ridiculous excitement that he was here.

But when I opened my door, it was immediately apparent that this was not a social visit. It was Matt, in full uniform, and another cop was with him. Matt was obviously extremely embarrassed. He had his hat off and was fidgeting with it. He was looking everywhere but at me. I was trying desperately not to think about the way his lips felt on my neck, his hands in my hair, his body pressing against mine—

“Sir?” It was the other cop talking, interrupting my treacherous thoughts, and I found it difficult to tear my eyes away from Matt and look at him. “We got a call that you have some kids here?”

It took me a second to process his words. “Yes.” I stepped aside so they could see the kids at the table. It seemed obvious to me what was going on: a bunch of kids, two pizza boxes, and at least a dozen open school books. The kids were all frozen, staring at the door, with pencils and floppy pieces of pizza in their hands. It looked like some crazy parody of The Last Supper. The cop—his tag said Officer Jameson—stalked past me to the table.

“What’s going on here? Which one of you is Aiden?”

Aiden turned about ten shades of red and raised his hand.

“Is this everybody?” Jameson asked. “Are there any kids back in the bedroom?”

“What?” I almost yelled, and at the same time, I heard Matt say, “Grant, don’t!” Grant just smirked at him.

The implications of what was going on were starting to catch up with me. I took a deep breath and said, “No, there’s nobody in the bedroom! How can you even ask that? I’m tutoring them.”

Jameson was opening his mouth to say something, and I could tell it was going to be something sarcastic, when Matt jumped in.

“Jared.” I could tell by his face that he hated saying it. “We got a call from one of the moms.” I heard Aiden groan. “She was worried about her kid spending so much time here. She asked us to check it out.”

“I’m not doing anything wrong.” My jaw was clenched so tight, I was surprised they could understand me.

Officer Grant Jameson snorted.

Matt shot him a dirty look but said to me, “I know.” He looked at the floor, fidgeted more with his hat. “She was pretty upset, and she’s been making calls to some of the other parents. I’m sorry.” Now he looked back up at me, and I hated myself for the way my heart skipped a beat, just looking into his eyes. “I think it might be best if you had them go home.”

“This is bullshit!” Ringo suddenly yelled, standing up from the table. “Jared is the only one who’s been able to teach us this stuff. You can’t make us leave.”

Jameson turned on him. “Look, kid—”

“Stop!” Amazingly, he did, and everybody looked at me. I turned to Jameson. “This is my house, and you have no right to come in here like this. I’m not doing anything wrong, and I would like you to leave. Right now.” I looked at Matt and said, “Both of you!” Matt flinched and looked away.

Jameson opened his mouth to speak, but I wasn’t done. I turned to the students. “I certainly don’t want anybody thinking I’m corrupting their kids.” I tried not to sound too sarcastic when I said that. “I think the officer is right. You should all go home.”

This was met by loud protests, mainly voiced in the form of obscenities, from the kids.

“Jared, you can’t quit teaching us now. We need your help,” Ringo said. “Since you started helping us, we’re all passing.”

One of the other boys jumped in. “Right. This is the first year that I’ve been able to keep playing football. Every other year, my math grades are too low for eligibility.”

“Listen, I’ll keep teaching—”

“Sir, I don’t think—”Jameson tried to cut in, but I just raised my voice and talked over him.

“—but anybody who comes back, you need to bring a note from your parents saying that it’s okay. Tell the others too. And I know your handwriting, so don’t try to forge it.”

Everybody looked relieved at that except Aiden. There didn’t seem to be much I could do about that, though.

The kids finally left, and Jameson headed for the car, but Matt hung back.

He was watching me warily. I was gathering up dirty paper plates and empty pop cans, doing my best not to look at him. “Jared, I’m sorry. I know you wouldn’t do anything inappropriate.” I didn’t say anything. Whatever anger I had started with was gone, and I just felt embarrassed and resentful. “This is why, isn’t it?” he asked quietly. “This is why you aren’t teaching? It’s not really about the shop at all.”

“Yes.” And I hated how defeated I sounded when I said it.

“Maybe you could—”

I didn’t want to talk to him about it. Not now, with everything else lying unfinished between us. I looked up at him and said, with more venom than I felt, “Will that be all, Officer Richards?” I could tell I had hurt him, but I didn’t care. He looked away.

“That’s all.”

I resisted the urge to slam the door behind him.