Chapter 71
I FINALLY DRAGGED MYSELF back to my apartment at sometime after two in the morning.
The events of the long, horrible day - Jill losing her child, Claire's terrifying ordeal - flipped by like some old-time nightmare film sequence. The man I was tracking had almost killed my best friend. Why Claire? What could it mean? Part of me felt responsible, dirtied by the crime.
My body ached. I wanted to sleep; I needed to wash away the day. Suddenly, the door to the guest bedroom opened, and my father shuffled out. In the madness of the day, I had almost forgotten he was here.
He was wearing a long white T-shirt and boxers with a seashell pattern. Somehow, with the deprivation of sleep, I found this funny.
“You're wearing boxers, Boxer,” I said. “You're a witty old bastard.” Then I told him what had happened. As a former cop, he would understand. Surprisingly, my father was a good listener. Just what I needed right about then.
He came around to my side of the couch. “You want coffee? I'll go make it, Lindsay.”
“Brandy would do the trick better. But there's some Moonlight Sonata tea on the counter there if you're up to it.” It was nice to have someone here, and he seemed eager to calm me.
I sank back in the couch, shut my eyes, and tried to figure out what I was going to do next. Davidson, Mercer and now Claire Washburn... Why would Chimera come after Claire?
What did it mean?
My father came back with a cup of tea and a snifter of Courvoisier two inches full. “I figure you're a big girl. So why not both.”
I took a sip of tea, then drank about half the brandy in a gulp. “Oh, I needed that. Almost as much as I need a break on this case. He's leaving clues, but I still don't get it.”
“Take it easy on yourself, Lindsay,” my father said in the gentlest voice.
“What do you do,” I asked, “when everyone in the world is watching and you have no idea what to do next? When you realize that whatever you're fighting isn't giving in, that you're fighting a monster?”
“That's about where we usually called in Homicide,” my father said with a smile.
“Don't try to make me laugh,” I begged. But my father had me smiling in spite of everything. Even more surprising to me, I was starting to think of him as my father.
His tone suddenly changed. “I can tell you what I did when it really got tough. I took off. You won't do that, Lindsay. I can tell. You're so much better than me.”
He was looking squarely at me, no longer smiling.
What happened next, I would never have believed. My father's arms just sort of parted, and almost without resistance, I found myself burrowing into his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around me, a little tentatively at first, then, just like any father and any daughter, he squeezed me with tender care. I didn't resist. I could smell the same cologne he wore when I was a child. It felt both strange and, at the same time, like the most natural thing in the world.
Having my father hold me unexpectedly, it felt like layers of pain were suddenly stripped away.
“You're going to catch him, Lindsay,” I heard him whisper, squeezing me and rocking"
"You will, Buttercup..
It was just what I needed to hear.
“Oh, Daddy,” I said. Nothing more, though"