Shades

SEVEN

Haven’t seen much of you lately, man,” Chuck said to Danny as they walked to school together. “What, you too good to hang out with us anymore?”

“Sorry,” Danny apologized. He felt guilty for blowing off his friends from the Hill. But he couldn’t explain it to them either. Ronnie and Jeremy would laugh. Chuck and Matt would think he’d gone crazy. “I’ve just been busy with stuff.”

“Like what?”

Danny shrugged. “Just school. Studying. Shit like that.”

“Studying?” Chuck frowned. “Since when?”

“I don’t want to be stuck in this town forever. I can’t play an instrument like you. I suck at sports. And my Mom sure ain’t gonna put me through college. So I’ve got to start doing better in school.”

“Who are you and what did you do with Danny?”

Snickering, Danny punched him in the arm. Chuck hit him back. Then the two boys laughed. It felt good.

“Man,” Chuck said. “You studying…and I thought Matt was the only one acting weird.”

“What do you mean?”

“If you hung out with us more lately, you’d know. Two nights ago, he went over to Mr. Bedrik’s house. He was gonna cut the wires on his car, the way Jeremy showed us.”

Danny’s stomach fluttered. “Did he get caught?”

“No.”

“Then what happened?”

“We don’t know what happened. He showed up for school yesterday and he was all buddy-buddy with Bedrik. Ronnie gave him shit about it at lunch, and Matt said it was all just a misunderstanding. Said Bedrik was an okay guy and he forgave him for the whole detention thing.”

“A misunderstanding? Matt’s old man beat the shit out of him for that. I can’t believe he let it drop.”

“Well, he did. Like I said, he’s been acting weird. There’s other stuff, too. He’s been eyeing the girls like fresh meat.”

“Nothing weird about that.”

“Yeah, but even the ugly ones. And he’s talking to himself a lot. He’s really fucked up. You should talk to him, Danny.”

“Why me?”

Chuck sighed. “You know how Ronnie and Jeremy are. If Matt opens up to them, they’ll just razz him. And he won’t talk to me about whatever’s going on. I already tried. Maybe he’ll talk to you.”

“Okay,” Danny agreed. “I’ll try.”

789

Danny tried talking to Matt during fifth period, when they had English class together. Matt’s attention was focused elsewhere.

“What’s your problem?” Danny asked.

“Check her out,” Matt said, nodding towards Valerie Hutchenson. “What’s her name?”

Danny was confused. “Val? Dude, you’ve known her since first grade. Are you on drugs or something?”

“Val.” Matt said it slowly. “She got a boyfriend?”

“She likes Ronnie. You know that.”

He smiled. “She’s got a ripe little body.”

“Matt, you’re acting like a real creep.”

“Am I?”

“Yeah,” Danny said. “You are. Jeremy wouldn’t even act like this. What’s wrong with you?”

Matt ignored the question. “What are you doing after school?”

“I don’t know. Probably studying.”

“Is that old Russian guy gonna help you?”

Danny held his breath. How had Matt found out about Gustav? And if he knew, did the other guys know, too? Chuck hadn’t said anything about it earlier.

“Gustav?” Danny smirked. “Why would I be hanging out with him?”

“I don’t know.” Matt stared at Val. “You tell me.”

The bell rang, and the teacher told them all to take their seats.

Danny shook his head. “I’ll talk to you later, man.”

Matt nodded, his eyes not leaving Val.

Danny took a seat next to Val at the front of the class. While the teacher handed out worksheets, Danny smiled at her. Val seemed wary.

“What’s up with your friend?” she whispered.

“I don’t know. Why? Something happen?”

She looked around and made sure the teacher wasn’t listening. “He grabbed my ass in homeroom this morning.”

“You didn’t tell on him?”

Val rolled her eyes. “No, but if he gets anywhere near me again, I’m gonna break his balls.”

Danny grinned. “I’ll help.”

Val put her hand on his forearm. Her touch was warm. “My hero.”

Danny felt like he was floating. He tried to speak, but couldn’t. Despite the giddy nervousness, he also felt guilty. It was no secret that Ronnie had the hots for Val, too, even though he wouldn’t admit it and never pursued it. How would he react if he knew?

Val leaned closer. “Just tell Matt to knock it off, okay? He’s seriously creeping me out.”

“I will.”

She broke contact as the teacher came down their aisle. Danny stared at the impressions her fingers had left behind on his arm. When he glanced back over at Val again, he blushed.

The feeling was a different kind of magic.

789

Danny was heading to study hall when he heard the screams. They were muffled, coming from the custodian’s closet. He knew the closet well. The lock on the door was busted, and sometimes he’d sneak inside with his friends to smoke. Something thumped against the door, followed by another scream.

“No, goddamn it, STOP!”

It was a girl’s voice. After a second, he recognized it.

Val.

The door rattled in its frame. Then he heard laughter.

Matt.

Danny flung the door open and gasped. Matt stared at him in surprise, teeth bared like an animal. His pants and underwear were around his ankles. He was perched atop Val. One small breast poked out of her torn blouse. Her lip was bleeding, her left eye swollen, her cheeks glistening with tears.

“Hey man.” Matt grinned. “You want some, too? I told you she was ripe. Come on in and shut the door.”

“You motherfucker…”

Danny grabbed Matt’s hair and yanked him forward. The other boy shouted, twisting in Danny’s grip. Danny pulled him off Val and out into the hallway. Sobbing, Val pulled her blouse together. Danny threw Matt to the floor and hovered over him.

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

Matt stood and pulled his pants up. “Me? What the hell’s wrong with you, Danny? Is hanging out with Gustav turning you into a queer?”

“He’s not queer,” Danny shouted. “He’s my friend.”

Matt grinned. “So you are hanging out with him, huh?”

Before Danny could respond, Val leapt out of the closet and knocked Matt to the floor again. His head cracked against the tiles. Shrieking, Val kicked him in the balls. The air rushed from Matt’s lungs. He tried to curl into a ball as Val slapped him repeatedly.

“Hey, you kids!”

The Principal, Mr. Sarandos, charged down the hallway, shouting at them to break it up. He shoved Danny aside and pulled Val off of Matt. Holding each of them by the arm, he herded Matt and Val toward the office. Val protested. Matt said nothing. Mr. Sarandos glanced back over his shoulder.

“You, too, Danny. My office. Now.”

Danny followed, his head hung low.

When they reached the office, the receptionist looked up in alarm.

“Oh my,” she gasped. “What happened?”

“Not now, Grace,” the Principal said. “Hold my calls.”

He steered the three kids into his office, made them sit down, and slammed the door behind him. The room was quiet, except for Val’s sobs. Outside, Grace began typing again. Mr. Sarandos sat down behind his desk and glared at them. After a moment, he took a deep breath and asked, “What happened?”

All three began talking at once.

“She told me I could,” Matt said.

Val held her ruined blouse together with one hand and choked back tears. “I told you to keep your hands off me.”

The Principal looked at Danny. “What did you see?”

Danny glanced at Matt. They were friends. They stuck together. But what he’d done…Danny’s stomach sank. He looked down at his shoes. His voice was very low.

“I heard Val screaming in the janitor’s closet. I opened the door and…” He took a deep breath. “Matt was on top of her. He had his pants down. He was going to…rape her.”

Danny glanced at his friend. Matt’s expression remained neutral, almost like he didn’t care. That was weird. Wasn’t he afraid of what his father would do to him this time?

“Matt,” the Principal said, “is this true?”

“He’s lying, sir. Val was the one who led me into the closet. She wanted to make out.”

Val burst into tears again. “That’s not true! You tried to rape me…”

Mr. Sarandos picked up the telephone. He stared at Matt while he spoke. “Grace, please call the police.” He glanced at Val, and his expression softened. “And we’ll need paramedics, too. Who’s free this period? Bedrik? Good. Please have him come down here, as well.”

He hung up the phone and sighed.

Matt glared at Danny.

Danny shook his head, looked down at his hands, and tried not to cry.

789

“You stupid little shit.”

Bedrik kept his voice low, his expression neutral. Sarandos and Danny were busy giving an account to the police. Val was with the paramedics. Since he had no classes this period, the Principal had asked Bedrik to watch Matt while they spoke to the police.

“I’m sorry,” Timothy Wells said through Matt’s mouth. “I couldn’t help it. She was warm and it’s cold where I was. It’s been so long.”

“Shut up.” Bedrik leaned closer, whispering into Matt’s ear. “You were warned to curb your old desires. I didn’t set you free so that you could return to a lifestyle of rape and sadism. You were to find out if Danny was being tutored by Gustav. If he was, you were to let me know. That is all. And now you’ve fucked it up.”

The office door opened and the police came out, followed by Principal Sarandos. Bedrik straightened up and did his best to look solemn. He caught a glimpse of Danny through the open door. The boy appeared distraught.

The policemen were both under Bedrik’s control, their bodies inhabited by shades, but they kept up the appearance of normalcy. They handcuffed Matt and read him his rights. Then, while the faculty and students watched from the windows, they led him to the patrol car and put him in the back seat. Bedrik did not accompany them. He stayed inside the office and watched Danny.

Danny was too upset to notice.

789

When the final bell rang, Danny didn’t stick around to use the school library. For the first time since his agreement with Gustav, he couldn’t wait to get out of school. The halls echoed with the ghost of Val’s screams.

The walk home had never seemed longer. It hurt to think. Hurt to feel. What good was magic when it couldn’t change what had happened, or erase the memories from his mind? He’d never felt worse. He’d ratted on a friend, an unforgivable sin. But Matt’s sin was greater. Matt wasn’t just in trouble this time. This was more than detention or a beating from his old man. Matt was in deep shit. And Val—Danny thought about how he’d felt when she touched his arm. Somehow, that made what had happened to her seem even worse. He was disgusted with Matt for what he’d done, and disgusted with himself for the guilty arousal he’d felt when he saw Val’s exposed breast.

He wished that magic could make the entire day just go away.

Ronnie, Chuck, and Jeremy caught up with him on Ghilcrest Road.

“What the fuck happened?” Ronnie demanded.

Danny studied his friends. Ronnie and Jeremy were coiled tight, ready to snap. Chuck was sullen.

“Chuck said Matt was acting weird. Well, you were right. He tried to rape Val.”

“Jesus…” Chuck shook his head in disbelief.

“Damn,” Jeremy snickered. “Didn’t know he had it in him.”

“And you stopped him?” Ronnie asked.

Danny nodded. “Yeah.”

“Cool.” Ronnie seemed relieved. “But if you stopped it, then why did the cops arrest him?”

“I just said, man. He tried to rape Val.”

“She told on him?” Chuck asked.

Danny didn’t respond. He stared at his feet.

“Dude,” Jeremy muttered, stepping forward, “tell us she ratted him out. That’s what happened, right?”

Danny shook his head. The three boys pressed closer, surrounding him.

“You didn’t narc on him,” Jeremy said. “No way. Fuck that noise.”

“Yeah,” Danny whispered, “I did.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Danny!”

“Well, what was I supposed to do, man? He tried to rape her. I wasn’t going to lie for him.”

“Why not?” Jeremy hollered. “He’s one of us, man. You chose Val over Matt?”

Chuck ran his hand through his hair. “This is fucked up.”

“Don’t give me that,” Danny said. “You guys would have done the same thing. Ronnie? You like Val. You would have told on Matt, too. In a heartbeat. Tell them.”

Ronnie didn’t respond. He stared at the ground. Chuck looked away. Jeremy spat at his feet and glared at Danny.

“You know what,” Danny said. “Fuck you guys.”

“Fuck you, too,” Jeremy shouted.

Danny pushed past Ronnie and Chuck, turning his back on them and walking away. He tensed, waiting for Jeremy to swing, waiting for all three of them to jump him. They didn’t. Somehow, that made it worse.

Danny wanted to turn around, but he resisted the urge. Instead he kept walking. He felt them staring at him, felt the silent incrimination. They thought he’d changed. He didn’t hang out anymore. He’d told on Matt. In their eyes, he was somebody else. But he hadn’t changed. He still felt like the same person. Only now, he was the same person without any friends.

Except for Gustav.

He just wished the old man had told him about magic’s price before he paid it.