Sirens in Bliss

Chapter Six:

Rafe

Rafe walked back into the living room, a tray of coffee in his hands. Damn, but he needed Laura here. She could handle this motley crew. He’d been dealing with them for almost an hour and he still hadn’t figured out why they were here.

Now he was playing hostess. My, how the mighty had fallen. He was now serving coffee and tea cakes. He hadn’t even realized they had tea cakes until he’d looked through the pantry.

He set down the tray and hoped that someone would get to the point soon.

Polly and Long-Haired Roger sat on opposite sides of the room, staring each other down from time to time. They were long-time rivals, though their businesses had nothing to do with one another. Long-Haired Roger—not to be confused with Roger, who actually had some hair and was rumored to have named himself king of Rogerland, a separate country from the US that existed only on his ten acres—was a mechanic. He had a shop and employed two mechanics, Rafe’s neighbors, Jesse and Cade. Polly ran the local hair salon. As far as Rafe could tell, their long-term feud had started over the Cut and Curl’s flashing neon pink lips that apparently gave Long-Haired Roger’s former dog seizures. They were always going after each other at town hall meetings. At one point in time the town had paid for therapy, but the poor therapist had fled after the second session and refused to come back.

So the fact that they were attempting to present a united front now made Rafe curious.

Stella had taken Sierra the minute she’d walked in the door, cooing and cuddling the baby girl as if she was her own. She paced as she talked, giving Sierra comforting little pats on her back. “This is serious, Rafe. Nothing like it has ever happened here before.”

Long-Haired Roger shook his head solemnly. “That’s because we only had one mayor. Hi’s been mayor for years. Forever it seems like. We’ve never had to deal with anything like this.”

“Something’s happened to the mayor?” Hiram Jones had been the mayor of Bliss since the moment the hippies who founded Bliss had realized that they needed someone who could deal with the surrounding cities. Rafe had heard the stories. Apparently Hiram had been elected because he was the only one who could deal with both the hippies and the ranchers.

Marie, the owner of the Trading Post with her life partner, Teeny, shook her head. “You could say that.”

“Hiram had a heart attack,” Zane explained.

Rafe was startled. Hiram seemed so healthy for a ninety-seven-year-old with nearly every ailment known to man. He could be seen walking the streets at least once a day, tipping his hat to everyone he met. “I am so sorry to hear about that. I genuinely like Hiram. How is he?”

Polly waved her hand. “He’s fine.”

“Polly, he’s dead,” Long-Haired Roger shot back. “Do you have a sensitive bone in your body?”

“Probably not.” A single shoulder shrugged up. “Well, I just meant that his body is fine.”

“How can his body be fine if he’s dead?” Rafe was a little stunned and utterly at a loss for why they were telling him this way. Were they going from house to house?

“We got to him quick enough. We shoved him in Zane’s freezer,” Polly explained as though she was talking about how she’d cut someone’s bangs.

Stella bounced Sierra a little. “It’s fine, Rafe. You know Zane. He has to buy everything completely oversized because he’s trying to outdo the rest of us.”

“Or I’m just not stingy with the cash and I like to make sure my customers get the best,” Zane replied.

He and Stella were friendly rivals. They each ran one of the two eateries in Bliss proper. Stella’s was known for having the best breakfast in Southern Colorado and Trio was a cozy tavern that apparently had a man-sized freezer that currently served as the former mayor of Bliss’s casket.

And none of this explained why they had come to talk to him. “If one of you needs a lawyer, you should go and talk to Gemma. She’s licensed in Colorado now. She can help you. Do you want me to call her?”

They all looked positively horrified. Long-Haired Roger took off his hat and swiped his hand across his head. “You can’t tell Gemma. God, man. That’s a horrible idea.”

Zane was in complete agreement. “Gemma would lick her chops at the implications. That girl loves to complicate things with silly little laws and ordinances.”

“Like not putting the town’s mayor in a deep freeze? There has to be some sort of code against that,” Rafe said.

Well, he’d wanted his mind off his anxieties. He definitely wasn’t thinking about his family trouble or finding a job. He was wondering if he was going to have to call Cam in to arrest the members of the Bliss Chamber of Commerce. Had one of them killed the poor mayor? Somehow he just couldn’t see it. He’d profiled the worst of America’s serial killers and while the five people in front of him might be clinically insane, they weren’t truly violent.

Well, Long-Haired Roger wasn’t. The rest…

Marie rolled her eyes. “Well, Rafe, if we didn’t put him in the deep freeze, he was going to start to smell. Or he would attract animals. I took a vow a long time ago to not allow another animal to take a chunk out of Hi. Oh, we were shit faced from Mel’s tonic at the time, but out here a vow means something. Why do you want to let a bear eat Hi? Or a deer?”

“A deer?” He wasn’t quite following the conversation, but Rafe found himself utterly fascinated to see what would happen next.

“Oh, are you one of those liberals who think deer are all like Bambi?” Marie asked, her eyes narrowing in accusation. “Don’t you believe it. You haven’t stared into those doe eyes and just known that if you lay there long enough, a deer will eat you, too. This is the wilderness, Kincaid. This ain’t some namby-pamby suburb where neighbors don’t watch out for each other. Do you know how embarrassed Hi would be if he was eaten by a deer?”

“More or less than having his body stuffed into a freezer?” Rafe asked.

“It’s a really comfortable freezer, Rafe,” Zane said as though that was a completely sensible thing to say. “So look, we’re kind of flying by the seat of our pants here. It was all a shock when Bambi called Polly up and told her Hi was dead.”

Maybe he was dreaming. That would explain it. He’d fallen asleep, and he was having the oddest dream. “So a deer did get Hi.”

Zane sent him a look that let Rafe know he was a dumbass for not following along. “No, Bambi is a hooker.”

Marie shrugged. “But I think she’d probably eat a person, too.”

Polly sent Marie a fierce frown. “For a woman of your persuasion, you are very intolerant of alternative lifestyles, Marie.”

“Hooking ain’t an alternative lifestyle. It’s just a way of spreading venereal diseases and body glitter all over the place.”

“Well, Bambi is one of my best customers and you are just showing your ignorance, Marie. Bambi wouldn’t be caught dead in body glitter. You’re thinking of the strippers from the club two towns over. No, Bambi is all about her nails. That girl has to hook just to pay for her nails.” Polly looked down at her own briefly. “So much bling on a couple of little nails. I swear when the lights hit her hands it’s like a disco club from the seventies just pops up all around her.”

“Wait. We have strip clubs?” Long-Haired Roger asked, his brows climbing up his face. “When the heck did that happen?”

“Roger, it’s a rural strip club. You do not want to go there. You can’t unsee that shit.” Zane leaned forward.

“Could someone explain what happened?” It was like dealing with a group of toddlers. They all chased the shiny objects.

Zane continued. “So Bambi calls and Hiram’s dead and Polly flips out.”

“I did not flip out, Zane Hollister.” Polly pointed her extremely long fingernail straight at Zane. “I had a perfectly reasonable and rational reaction to the world ending. You know damn well what’s going to happen. We’ve plotted and planned and it all went up in smoke and cheap, knockoff perfume because no one wanted to step up to the plate and Hiram was too stubborn. I swear that man thought he would live forever.”

Rafe held a hand up. “Did this particular Bambi—hooker Bambi—murder Hiram?”

Maybe she’d taken off and they needed Rafe to track her. It had been a while, but he could do it.

Stella gasped a little. “Rafe, Bambi is a pacifist. She would never be violent unless a client paid her to. You know you’re sounding a little intolerant, too. Maybe we should rethink this whole thing.”

It was Rafe’s turn to sigh. If he didn’t watch it, someone would tell Nell he wasn’t honoring all peoples’ rights and she would chant outside his door. “All right, so Bambi is a sweet woman who loves her nails and peace on earth and gives blow jobs for a living. What did she have to do with Hiram’s death?”

Zane tried valiantly not to smile. His lips kept tugging up and then he would force them down. “She was, uhm, working with Hi at the time of his death.”

“So the mayor of Bliss had a heart attack while screwing a hooker,” Rafe surmised.

Zane finally grinned. “Yeah, I bet it was a good way to go. You should have seen the smile on the old guy’s face.”

“You can, actually,” Long-Haired Roger offered. “We got him to the deep freeze before it was gone.”

“He really did look good,” Polly said.

“That smile made him look like he was eighty-six again,” Stella reminisced. “That was a good year for him.”

If he didn’t get them back on task, he would lose them again. “All right, so you put Hiram in the deep freeze to spare him the scandal of dying in the arms of a hooker.”

Polly shook her head. “Oh, he wasn’t in her arms. He was in a sex sling.”

Zane scratched his head. “Yeah, I don’t think he really knew how to use that thing.”

Rafe’s frustration was growing. “Could someone please explain why the hell you’re all telling me this? Shouldn’t you talk to Nate? Or Caleb. Caleb really needs to write out a death certificate and someone should contact Hiram’s family.”

“We can’t tell Caleb because Caleb would want to put down his actual time of death. We can’t have that. It’s exactly what we’re trying to avoid. Oh, and Hiram’s family tossed him out long ago,” Marie said. “They lived here before the hippies showed up. There were about five families living here full time back then. Once the hippies formed their commune, two of the families—the Joneses and Penningtons—tried to get them thrown off the land they bought. When it didn’t work, they moved. Hi was already in his forties back then, but he hadn’t married. He had ten brothers and five sisters and his daddy was a minister. When he found out Hiram was helping the hippies winterize their cabins, he gave Hi a choice. He could go with the family to a more godly place or stay in Colorado and go to Hell. They went to Idaho and Hi stayed here. He never saw them afterward.”

So Hiram had given up a lot for this town. “They never called or wrote?”

Stella shook her head. “No, though Hi did try to keep up with them. They rebuffed him. His momma and daddy never talked to him again. And he lost track of all those siblings.”

Like Rafe would. His brother lived on the East coast. They hadn’t been close before, but Rafe had enjoyed seeing Javier at their mother’s house for Christmas. Javier had recently gotten married. How long would it be before his brother had children? Rafe wouldn’t know his nieces or nephews and Sierra wouldn’t know she had cousins. “So Hiram didn’t have a family.”

Stella seemed a little startled. “Of course he did.”

“Do you know who named this town?” Long-Haired Roger asked.

“I thought the hippies came up with Bliss.” It sounded like a very hippie-type name.

Polly shook her head. “Oh, no, that was Hiram. He named the town Bliss because he always said this was where his happiness was. Hiram had a family. He had us.”

Stella had tears in her eyes. “Hiram was everyone’s uncle or brother in the beginning. He told me once that he’d fallen in love with one of those hippie girls, but she couldn’t love him back. He let his family go because loving her and watching over her was more important to him than a family that would leave him behind over their prejudice.”

Zane looked up, obviously interested in that little bit of history. “Really? Hiram was in love? Did the girl stay around?”

Long-Haired Roger’s mouth hung open just a little. “Hiram never told me, Stella. Wow. That explains how Rye got the job as deputy after his mom died and he and Max needed jobs to keep custody of Brooke.”

“So Hiram was in love with Max and Rye’s mom,” Zane said.

“Oh, yes, but he never tried to come between her and her husband. Not that Jimmy turned out so great. That man better never walk back into Bliss. No, after Margie died and Jimmy left and well, the rest of the town took over for them and Hiram organized it all. He’s been the beating heart of this town, and I don’t know what we’ll do without him.”

Rafe sat back, moved by the story. He’d only known the man for a brief period of time and he’d seemed larger than life, the way a lot of the citizens of Bliss seemed to be. He’d been a bit of a cartoon character, but any human was deeper than his surface. It was something he’d forgotten along the way. No matter how cheerful or odd a man could seem, there was a well of loss and love beneath the surface, a well that formed a human life.

Hiram had lost one family and found another. Had he truly been happy?

“Well, we have to figure out what we’re going to do without him or his entire legacy will be gone.” Long-Haired Roger seemed intent on playing up his Chicken Little syndrome.

“Can we not take a minute to mourn?” Stella asked.

“Not much more than a minute,” Zane replied. “Because I have a whole shipment of wings coming in Monday morning, and I’m going to have to clean the freezer out.”

They all started talking at once, arguing in loud voices.

“Stop it,” Rafe said in a low voice. It was the voice he used to use on the most obnoxious of informants.

Though he hadn’t really raised his voice, they all quieted and long looks passed between the five of them.

Polly finally gave Zane a nod. “All right. I won’t fight you on it. You’re right about him.”

Everyone else sighed and some amount of tension seemed to leave the room.

Zane had a shit-eating grin on his face when he turned back to Rafe. “Just use that tone of voice on everyone and you’ll be fine, Mr. Mayor.”

Shit. His day had just taken a turn for the worse.