11 Glass

As she trailed behind Cora and Huxley on their way to the Exchange, Glass found herself wishing that her mother had waited a few more days before spreading the news of her pardon. At first, she’d been overjoyed to see her friends. When they’d walked through her door that morning, all three girls had burst into sobs. But now, watching Cora and Huxley exchange knowing smiles as they passed a boy Glass didn’t recognize, she felt more alone than she ever had in her cell.

“I bet you have a ton of points saved up,” Huxley said as she wrapped her arm around Glass. “I’m jealous.”

“All I have is what my mother transferred to me this morning.” Glass gave her a weak smile. “The rest were eliminated after my arrest.”

Huxley shuddered dramatically. “I still can’t believe it.” She lowered her voice. “You never did tell us why you were Confined.”

“She doesn’t want to talk about that,” Cora said as she glanced nervously over her shoulder.

No, you don’t want to talk about that , Glass thought as they turned onto the main B deck corridor, a long, wide passage bordered by panoramic windows on one side and benches tucked between artificial plants on the other. It was midday, and most of the benches were occupied by women her mother’s age talking and sipping sunflower root tea. Technically, you were supposed to use ration points at the tea stand, but Glass couldn’t remember the last time she’d been asked to scan her thumb. It was just one of the many small luxuries of life on Phoenix that she’d never given a second thought until she started spending time with Luke.

As the girls strode down the corridor, Glass could feel nearly every pair of eyes turn to her. Her stomach twisted as she wondered what had been more shocking—the fact that she’d been Confined or the fact that she’d been pardoned. She held her head up high and tried to look confident as she walked past. Glass was supposed to be an example of the Colony’s sense of justice, and she would have to keep face as though her life depended on it. Because this time, it did.

“Do you think there’s any chance Clarke will get pardoned too?” Huxley asked as Cora shot her a warning look. “Did you guys ever like, hang out, while you were in Confinement?”

“Oh my god, Huxley, will you give it a rest?” Cora said, touching Glass’s arm in a supportive gesture. “Sorry,” she said. “It’s just that, when Clarke was sentenced just after you, nobody could believe it: two Phoenix girls in a few months? And then when you came back, there were all these rumors.…”

“It’s fine,” Glass said, forcing a smile to signal that she was okay talking about it. “Clarke got put into solitary pretty quickly, so I didn’t see her much. And I don’t know whether she’ll be pardoned,” she lied, remembering her mom’s imperative that she not talk about the Earth mission. “I’m not sure when she turns eighteen—my case was reevaluated since it’s almost my birthday.”

“Oh, ri fyway?strodght, your birthday!” Huxley squealed, clapping her hands. “I forgot it’s coming up. We’ll have to find you something at the Exchange.”

Cora nodded, seeming overjoyed to have found their way back to such an acceptable topic, as the girls approached their destination.

The Phoenix Exchange was in a large hall at the end of B deck. In addition to panoramic windows, it held an enormous chandelier that had supposedly been evacuated from the Paris Opera house hours before the first bomb fell on Western Europe. Whenever Glass heard the tale, she felt a twinge of sadness for the people who might’ve been saved instead, but she couldn’t deny that the chandelier was breathtaking. Dancing with reflected light from the ceiling and the windows, it looked like a small cluster of stars, a miniature galaxy spinning and shimmering overhead.

Huxley let go of Glass’s arm and dashed over to a display of ribbons, oblivious to the nearby group of girls who’d fallen silent at Glass’s arrival. Glass blushed and hurried after Cora, whose eyes were trained on a textile booth near the back wall.

She stood awkwardly next to Cora while her friend rummaged through the fabric, quickly reducing the orderly stack into a messy pile while the Walden woman behind the table gave her a tight smile. “Look at all this crap,” Cora muttered as she flung a piece of burlap and a few strips of fleece to the side.

“What are you looking for?” Glass asked, running her finger along a tiny scrap of pale-pink silk. It was beautiful, even with the rust marks and water stains along the edges, but it would be impossible to find enough matching pieces for a small evening bag, let alone a dress.

“I’ve spent a million years collecting scraps of blue satin, and I finally have enough for the slip, but I need to layer something over it so it doesn’t look too patchworky.” Cora wrinkled her nose as she examined a large piece of clear vinyl. “How much is this?”

“Six,” the Walden woman said.

“You’re not serious.” Cora rolled her eyes at Glass. “It’s a shower curtain.”

“It’s Earthmade.”

Cora snickered. “Authenticated by who?”

“How about this?” Glass asked, holding up a piece of blue netting. It looked like it had once been part of a storage bag, but no one would be able to tell once it was applied to the dress.

“Oooh,” Cora cooed, snatching it out of Glass’s hand. “I like it.” She held it against her body to check the length, then smiled up at Glass. “Good thing your time in Confinement didn’t affect your fashion sense.” Glass stiffened but said nothing. “So, what are you going to wear?”

“To what?”

“To the viewing party,” she said, enunciating her syllables as one might do with a small child. “For the comet?”

“Sorry.” Glass shrugged. Apparently, spending six months in Confinement was no excuse for failing to keep up with the Phoenix social calendar.

“Your mother didn’t tell you about it when you got back?” Cora continued, holding the netting around her waist like a petticoat. “There’s a comet on track to pass right by the ship—the closest any has come since the Colony was founded.”

“And there’s a viewing party?”

Cora nodded. “On the observation deck. They’ve been making all sorts of exceptions so there konsoman saidcan be food, drinks, music, everything. I’m going with Vikram.” She grinned, but then her face fell. “I’m sure he won’t mind if you come along. He knows there are, well, extenuating circumstances.” She gave Glass a sympathetic smile and turned back to the Walden woman. “How much?”

“Nine.”

Suddenly, Glass’s head began to pound. She murmured an excuse to Cora, who was still negotiating with the shopkeeper, and wandered off to look at the display of jewelry on a nearby table. She brushed her fingers absently along her bare throat. She’d always worn a necklace chip, the device some girls on Phoenix chose as an alternative to earbuds or cornea slips. It was fashionable to have the chip embedded in a piece of jewelry, if you were lucky enough to have a relic in the family or managed to find something at the Exchange.

Her eyes traveled over the glittering assemblage and a glint of gold caught her eye—an oval locket on a delicate chain. Glass inhaled sharply as a wave of pain crashed over her, filling every inch of her body with a throbbing mix of grief and sorrow. She knew she should turn away and keep walking, but she couldn’t help it.

Glass reached out a trembling arm and picked up the necklace. The outline blurred as tears filled her eyes. She ran her finger carefully over the carving in the back, knowing without having to look that it was an ornate cursive G. “Are you sure you don’t mind spending your birthday on Walden?” Luke asked, leaning his head back next to hers on the couch. The look of concern on his face was so sincere, it almost made her laugh. “How many times do I have to tell you?” Glass swung her legs up so they were lying across Luke’s. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

“But didn’t your mom want to throw you some fancy party?” Glass rested her head on her shoulder. “Yes, but what’s the point if you can’t be there?”

“I don’t want you giving up your whole life just because I can’t be a part of it.” Luke ran his fingers down Glass’s arm, suddenly serious. “Do you ever wish we hadn’t stopped you that night?”

As a member of the prestigious mechanical engineering unit, Luke wasn’t normally assigned to checkpoint duty, but he’d been called in one evening when Glass had been hurrying back from studying with Wells.

“Are you kidding?” She raised her head to kiss his cheek. The taste of his skin was enough to make her whole body tingle, and she moved her lips down, tracing the line of his jaw up to his ear. “Breaking curfew that night was the best decision I’ve ever made,” she whispered, smiling as he shuddered slightly.

The curfew wasn’t strictly enforced on Phoenix, but she’d been stopped by a pair of guards. One of them had given Glass a hard time, forcing her to provide a thumb scan and then asking hostile questions. Eventually, the other guard had stepped in and insisted on escorting Glass the rest of the way.

“Walking you home was the best decision I ever made,” he murmured. “Although it was torture trying to keep myself from kissing you that night.”

“Well, then, we’d better make up for lost time now,” Glass teased, moving her lips back to his. Her kisses grew mo kiss a part ofre urgent as he placed his hand on the back of her head and wove his fingers through her hair. Glass shifted until she was sitting mostly in Luke’s lap, feeling his other arm move down to her waist to keep her from falling.

“I love you,” he whispered in her ear. No matter how many times she heard the words, they never ceased to make her shiver.

She pulled away just long enough to breathe, “I love you too,” then kissed him again, running her hand lightly down his side and then resting her fingers on the sliver of skin between his shirt and his belt.

“We should take a break,” Luke said, gently pushing her hand to the side. Over the past few weeks, it’d become increasingly difficult to keep things from progressing too far.

“I don’t want to.” Glass gave him a coy smile and returned her lips to his ear. “And it’s my birthday.”

Luke laughed, then groaned as he rose to his feet with Glass in his arms.

“Put me down!” Glass giggled, kicking her feet in the air. “What are you doing?”

Luke took a few steps forward. “Taking you to the Exchange. I’m trading you in for a girl who won’t try so hard to get me in trouble.”

“Hey.” She huffed with mock indignation, then started pounding her fists into his chest. “Put me down!”

He turned away from the door. “Are you going to behave yourself?”

“What? It’s not my fault you’re too hot to keep my hands off of.”

“Glass,” he warned.

“Fine. Yes, I promise.” “Good.” He walked back to the couch and laid her gently back down. “Because it’d be a shame if I couldn’t give you your present.”

“What is it?” Glass asked, pushing herself up into a seated position.

“A chastity belt,” Luke said gravely. “For me. I found it at the Exchange. It cost a fortune, but it’s worth it to protect—”

Glass smacked him in the chest. Luke laughed and wrapped his arms around her. “Sorry,” he said with a grin. He reached into his pocket then paused. “It’s not wrapped or anything.”

“That’s okay.”

He pulled something out of his pocket and extended his arm toward her. A gold locket glittered on his palm.

“Luke, it’s beautiful,” Glass whispered, reaching out to take the locket. Her eyes widened as her fingers ran along its delicate edges. “This is Earthmade.” She looked up at him in surprise.

He nodded. “Yes, at least, it’s supposed to be, according to the records.” He picked it up out of her hand.

Glass nodded, and Luke stepped behind her to fasten the clasp. She shivered at the touch of his hand on her neck as he brushed her hair to the side. She could only imagine how much something like this cost—Luke must have used his entire savings on it. Even as a guard, he didn’t have many ration points to spare. “I love it,” Glass said, running her finger along the chain as she turned to face him.

His smile lit up his whole face. “I’m so glad.” Luke ran his hand down her neck and turned the locket over, revealing a G etched into the gold.

“Did you do that?” Glass asked.

Luke nodded. “Even in a thousand years, I want people to know that it belonged to you.” He pressed his finger against the locket, pushing the metal against her skin. “Now you just have to fill it with your own memories.”

Glass smiled. “I know what memory I want to start with.” She looked up, expecting to see Luke roll his eyes, but his face was serious. Their eyes met, and for a long moment, the flat was silent except for the sound of their beating hearts.

“Are you sure?” Luke asked, his brow furrowing slightly as he ran a finger along the inside of her arm.

“More sure than I’ve been of anything in my life.”

Luke took Glass’s hand, and a current of electricity shot through her. He squeezed his fingers around hers and, without a word, led her toward his bedroom. Of course he’d traded it, Glass told herself. It’d be ridiculous to keep such a valuable item, especially after she’d broken his heart. Yet the thought of her discarded necklace languishing alone in the Exchange unleashed a pang of grief that threatened to rip her heart in two. A prickle on the back of her neck pulled Glass from her thoughts. She braced herself, expecting to see another vague acquaintance staring at her with open suspicion. But when she turned around, her eyes landed on someone else entirely.

Luke.

He stared at her just long enough for Glass to blush, then broke away as his eyes flitted toward the table. An odd expression crossed his face as his gaze landed on the necklace. “I’m surprised no one’s snatched it up yet,” he said quietly. “It’s so beautiful.” His arm dropped back to his side, and he turned around to give her a small, sad smile. “But then again, the beautiful ones can hurt you the most.”

“Luke,” Glass began, “I—” But then she noticed a familiar figure behind Luke. Camille stood behind the counter of the paper texts stall, her eyes fixed on Glass.

Luke glanced over his shoulder and then turned back to Glass. “Camille’s covering for her father. He’s been sick.”

“I’m sorry,” Glass said. But before she had time to say anything else, she was distracted by the sound of raised voices.

Glass turned and saw Cora shouting at the Walden woman. “If you refuse to charge me a reasonable price, then I’ll have no choice but to report you for fraud.” The woman paled and said something Glass couldn’t hear, but apparently, it was to Cora’s liking, because she smiled a k shn two. A nd held her thumb up to be scanned.

Glass grimaced, embarrassed by her friend’s behavior. “Sorry—I should go.”

“Don’t,” Luke pleaded, touching her arm. “I’ve been worried about you.” He lowered his voice. “What are you doing here? Is it safe?”

The concern in his voice filled some of the smaller cracks in her battered heart, but not enough to make the pain go away. “It’s safe. I was pardoned, actually,” Glass said, trying hard to keep her voice steady.

“Pardoned?” His eyes widened. “Wow. I never thought… That’s incredible.” He paused, as if unsure how to go on. “You know, you never told me why you were Confined in the first place.”

Glass cast her eyes toward the ground, fighting an overwhelming urge to tell Luke the truth. He deserves to be happy, she reminded herself firmly. Hes not yours anymore.

“It doesn’t matter,” she said finally. “I just want to put it all behind me.”

Luke stared at her, and for a moment Glass wondered if he could see straight through her. “Well, take care of yourself,” he said finally.

Glass nodded. “I will.” She knew she was doing the right thing, for once. She just wished it didn’t hurt so much.

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