The Justice Game

80

It was late in the evening. Kelly’s meeting with Jason Noble had been over for more than an hour, and there was no way in the world that she was going to sleep. She walked out onto the balcony of her room, overlooking the boardwalk, and breathed in the night air.

She loved this view, had retreated to this spot numerous times in the last few days with the pressure of the trial bearing down on her. It was here, listening to the rhythmic beat of the ocean, that she had fine-tuned her opening statement. Last night, pacing back and forth on the small balcony, staring out at the ocean, she had imagined every minute of the cross-examination of Melissa Davids.

The night air was muggy, but a nice breeze blew in from the ocean, and the air carried a curious blend of salt water and the aromas from the Catch 31 restaurant twelve stories below. She could hear the country band playing next door, at the outdoor Neptune Park. She could see tourists strolling the boardwalk, others walking in the sand, kids playing on the blue playset just below the statue of King Neptune.

But tonight, none of this could begin to calm her nerves. This case had enough pressure of its own. But after her meeting with Jason, the intrigue and mind games had increased tenfold.

Could she trust Jason Noble? Nothing in the history of this case suggested that he had much integrity.

Kelly was confused and restless. She was on the verge of emotional exhaustion, yet at the same time she felt almost jittery with nervous energy. In some ways, this was expected at the end of a long week of trial. She hadn’t exercised all week. The adrenaline just bounced around in her body with no productive outlet, draining her reserves.

She needed some kind of release. She needed to think. Maybe she could hit the hotel pool and do a few laps. The exercise might clear her mind.

She changed into a one-piece swimsuit that she used for training, threw on flip-flops and a pair of shorts, put her goggles around her neck, and grabbed a hotel towel.

The Hilton’s outdoor pool was on the roof of the hotel, twenty stories above the boardwalk, surrounded by a waist-high brick railing topped with a wire fence.

Kelly rode the elevator with businessmen and businesswomen dressed for a night on the town. The Hilton’s rooftop also featured a plush bar, and it was apparently a hot spot for the upscale locals.

When she stepped off the elevators and headed toward the pool, she knew immediately that this was a dumb idea. There were couples lounging in the lawn chairs. A few women in bikinis stood in the water with boyfriends or husbands, some draped all over each other, some holding drinks. Kelly chuckled at the absurd thought of trying to swim laps in this pool. The patrons cast a few suspicious glances her way, as if she had just shown up with a six-pack at an AA meeting.

Turning around, she headed back to the elevator.

Instead of hitting twelve, she pushed the button for the ground floor. She exited the lobby and stepped into the muggy Virginia Beach night. She crossed the boardwalk, headed toward the ocean, and took off her flip-flops.

The sand was smooth and cool on her feet. The expansive beach was unguarded and open to tourists at night, many of whom took advantage of it. Couples were sitting in the sand talking or holding hands as they walked in ankle-deep water at the edge of the ocean. A few guys were throwing a Frisbee by moonlight. A family walked their dog nearby.

The moon was three-quarters full, and there wasn’t a cloud in sight. The lights from the boardwalk and night sky cast a pale glow over the water of the Atlantic, an alluring invitation to do some real swimming.

Kelly picked a spot for her towel, flip-flops, and shorts. When nobody was looking, she buried her hotel room key in the sand, a few inches below her left flip flop. She put on her goggles and waded into the water until it was about knee deep, splashing some cold water on her shoulders and back.

A couple walking on the beach checked her out- What’s with the crazy woman? There were probably others staring as well. She took a deep breath and waded forward, the cold waves crashing against her and sucking her breath away. Here goes! She picked a large swell and dove under.

She came up instantly refreshed, raked back her hair, checked her goggles, waded a little deeper, and dove under another wave. This time she came up swimming. First she angled away from the shore, swimming under a few more large swells as they broke. Within seconds, she was out past the breaking waves, parallel to the shore, swimming freestyle, her body rolling with the rhythm of the ocean.

For the first few minutes, Kelly concentrated on getting in sync with the waves, timing her breaths to avoid swallowing salt water. Before long, she was in the zone. It felt great to be in her element, channeling her pent-up tension into each stroke. It seemed like the longer she swam the stronger she became. She kicked harder and lengthened her stroke, practically sprinting down the back side of the swells.

She knew she should be careful about holding some energy in reserve-a riptide could carry her out a half mile or more in no time at all. But tonight, she didn’t really care.

Fatigue came more quickly than she anticipated, but still she swam. After twenty minutes, she stopped long enough to glance at her watch. A good workout in the pool would be thirty minutes. But here, fighting the ocean swells, she had already been swimming twenty minutes and hadn’t even turned around.

She had drifted a little farther from shore than she had intended. She put her head down and plowed farther ahead, muscles beginning to burn. The pain was exactly what she needed. The risk was exactly what she wanted.

At twenty-five minutes, she turned and headed back toward the Hilton. Going in this direction, she rotated her head toward shore as she breathed, catching a glimpse of the lights from the oceanfront homes with every other stroke.

Ten minutes later, she started struggling a little. It was harder to breathe, and her arms and legs felt like lead weights. She was still dangerously far from shore, but tonight she had this inexplicable desire to flirt with danger. She knew how dangerous this was. Bordering on insane. She had a promising career. A family who loved her. She was on the verge of being a national figure-a hero in the fight against gun violence.

But none of that seemed to matter now. Because the one thing Kelly cared about most-her reputation, her integrity-was about to be shattered. Luthor would be forced to reveal what he knew. The Monica Lewinsky taint would follow Kelly forever. How often had her father said that if you lose your integrity you lose everything?

She swam harder. Longer. Pushing herself for one more minute… one more breath… one more stroke.

Finally she reached the point of exhaustion and started angling toward shore. As soon as she got there she would rest on the sand for a few minutes and then walk the rest of the way to the hotel.

But as she turned toward shore, at nearly the height of her fatigue, she felt the subtle pull of the current and realized she had miscalculated. The tide was taking her farther out-not a full-blown riptide but something close.

She stopped to tread water for a second and get her bearings but quickly started swimming again as she watched the shore grow more distant. A surge of adrenaline kicked in, and she nearly panicked as she realized that she was still losing ground. She knew the drill-don’t fight the riptide. Swim parallel to shore, out the side of the current, not against it.

But that required energy and stamina. She tried to get a deep breath and relax, but she was so tired. She gamely fought back the panic, put her head down, and started swimming parallel to the shore. Two minutes. Three minutes. Five.

She swallowed some water and coughed it up. The swells seemed larger now, though she knew it must be just an illusion. The shore was still fading away.

Thoughts about the trial had succumbed to a single-minded focus on survival. A prayer and another rush of adrenaline sustained her for a few more minutes, but at this rate it would be over soon. Her arms and legs burned with fatigue as lactic acid took its toll. She resisted the urge to shout out. It would be a waste of breath; nobody could hear her this far from shore.

There was only one thing to do-keep swimming.

She put her head down and continued pushing-past the fatigue, past the pain, one stroke at a time, each one more difficult than the last. In her competitive days, she was legendary for her will to win. Tonight, it would take every ounce of that will just to survive. She thought about everything worth living for-her faith, her family, her friends, the clients who needed her.

Nothing helped. She was going to lose this battle.

But just when she was ready to concede defeat, she felt a small shift in the current, very subtle-the gradual release of the riptide’s fingers. It was as if the fist of death had been pried opened by the hand of God.

She swam a few more aching strokes until she had completely cleared the current. She caught her breath by floating on the surface for a few minutes before starting the grind toward shore. She picked the right angle, rode the waves, relaxed between swells, and eventually felt sand under her exhausted legs.

She walked toward the beach and collapsed on her knees in the ankle-deep water. She stayed there for a minute, trying to catch her breath. How close had she been to dying? How many more minutes could she have fought the tide?

She knew God had snatched her out of danger. In a private moment that no one else would share or comprehend, He had rescued her. But only after she had quit fighting against the riptide. Only when she had been ready to give up and let the powerful ocean claim its victim. That’s when she had felt Him move.

Kneeling in the sand, she thought about some verses her dad had often quoted. The words of Jesus, though Kelly couldn’t remember when or where. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?

The whole world-a law career, a reputation, national fame.

What do you benefit if you gain the whole world and lose your soul?

To her horror, Kelly realized how much she had been toying with that bargain. Her pride and her shame had driven her away from God. She had been swimming against the need for repentance and reconciliation, trying to curry His favor with her crusades when what she really needed was mercy and acceptance.

Kneeling there in the sand, she asked God to forgive her.