Titanic 2020: Cannibal City

1 Pig

It all started with Babe the pig.

If Lucky Jimmy Armstrong and Claire Stanford hadn't been fighting over her, then they wouldn't have become separated, and if they hadn't become separated then the nightmare that followed — you know, with the Cannibals, the President's Train, the Quest and the Murdering Minister — well, it probably wouldn't have happened.

So, really, it was the pig's fault.

Pigs are like that. Always causing trouble.

Never trust a pig. Pigs have no sense of humour, and they can't juggle.

Yet the way Claire talked about Babe, you'd think Babe could tell a joke while keeping six balls in the air with her mucky little hooves.

Or trotters.

It started after they left Reunion Gap.

You won't find Reunion Gap on any map. Suffice to say it was one of hundreds of settlements that had sprung up along the eastern seaboard since the Red Death had struck. It was little more than a gathering place for survivors, a crossroads where two RVs had stopped and set up camp one night, and by next morning there were half a dozen other vehicles parked right beside them. Then there were twenty, then eighty six, then several hundreds of them, all shapes and sizes. Some had just a solitary driver; others were packed with family members or complete strangers, all intent on exchanging news, swapping or bartering food, drinking beer and wailing about the state of this new world. You've heard of that old saying — safety in numbers? This is what people thought: that if they all got together, they'd be OK. But it wasn't strictly true. People were frightened by what had happened, they were scared, horrified, panicky so little communities like Reunion Gap were really quite dangerous places. People were short tempered, and although they craved other human company, they also armed themselves with whatever weapons they could lay their hands on in case they didn't like that company. In communities like Reunion Gap violence exploded quite regularly

The Titanic's Captain Smith, First Officer Jeffers, and the rest of the crew — and at least some of the passengers — were aware that they had a good, secure, modern home, and while there were occasional shortages of food, and lapses in power, and outbreaks of disease, and short rebellions and noisy protests, they had it better than most. Partly because of this, and partly because it was his duty, Captain Smith endeavoured to lend assistance to people in settlements like Reunion Gap. The ship would drop anchor up to a mile off shore and Dr Hill would land with a team of nurses to set up a clinic, treating those that he could there and then, and ferrying more serious cases back to the ship for surgery. First Officer Jeffers would escort ashore those who wished to leave the ship to search for relatives; and then he would vet those who sought to join the Titanic for transportation further up the coast (as most roads were still blocked, and those that were open were invariably dangerous). Chief Engineer Jonas Jones' task was to search for those with particular skills who might wish to join up as crewmen; the Titanic was a huge ship and had been left shorthanded both by the plague and the recent mutiny.[1] Jimmy and Claire usually went ashore as reporter and photographer, recording the (usually) sad stories of the survivors. There was also a pressing need for a regular supply of fresh food on board, which meant that often on their return journeys the speedboats and motor launches which served the ship were packed with livestock. The pig that would shortly become known as Babe came on board at Reunion Gap in the company of twelve other pigs, sixteen cows and perhaps a hundred chickens.

First Officer Jeffers, overseeing their importation — the mooing, grunting, snorting, stinking lot of them sometimes couldn't quite believe what was happening to his beloved ship.

'I don't know if this is the bloody Titanic any more,' he wearily observed as he watched the latest arrivals trot nervously on board,' or Noah's bloody Ark.'

It was, in fact, Lucky Jimmy Armstrong, standing right beside him, who first noticed the pig who would become known as Babe. She was smaller than the others, leaner. Where the others were content to play follow my leader, turning obediently off to the left as they came on board, this one defiantly turned right and charged forward, completely unconcerned that she was heading directly for a solid wall. She duly cracked off it, let out a high pitched squeal, looked briefly in the direction ot her brothers and sisters, then turned around and fired herself at the wall again. There was another squeal. One of Jeffers' team, who professed some knowledge of farmyard animals, attempted to steer her in the right direction and got butted and stamped on for his trouble. The pig made another attempt on the wall.

'That pig,' Jeffers pointed out needlessly, 'is stupid.'

As the squealing continued — in fact, grew louder — they were joined by Claire, hurrying up to show Jimmy the photos she'd taken at Reunion Gap. The latest edition of the Titanic Times was due to go to press later that evening, and they still had to select the front page photo. As Jimmy looked through the pictures, Claire studied the pig as she made her fourth attempt on the wall.

'Aw, isn't she cute?'

Without looking up Jimmy said: 'No, it's a pig.'

'She's lovely.' Claire raised the camera slung around her neck and fired off a series of shots. 'Aow!' The pig had bounced off the wall again. 'That had to hurt.'

Jeffers ordered a second crewman forward, and this time they were able to steer the witless creature in the right direction, although not before she had left them all a nice big present. Jimmy held his nose. Claire laughed.

'Jimmy, have you never been on a farm?'

'No, and I've no wish to.'

'It's the most natural smell in the world.'

'It reminds me of something . . .' Jimmy clicked his fingers several times as he made a show of struggling to remember. 'Oh yes — it's your perfume.'

Claire made a face. 'Very funny. As a matter of fact, I don't wear perfume.'

'Maybe you should.' Jimmy smiled triumphantly and turned away. As he did, he held up the photos. 'I'll see if I can rescue something from this lot.'

Claire stood fuming. She glanced up at First Officer Jeffers. 'What're you smiling at?' she snapped.

' You.' Jeffers ruffled her hair — like she was a child — then turned to follow the animals. He could no longer see them, but they had left an unmistakable trail for him to follow. 'Noah's bloody Ark,' he muttered as he stepped carefully along the deck.