Trouble on the Heath: A Comedy of Russian Gangsters, Town Planners and a Dog Called Nigel

Chapter Eleven

Grigori Koslov hadn’t believed it when he first found it. It was unheard of! Why on earth would a criminal organisation post a list of all its members on its website, along with their addresses and phone numbers? Why on earth would a criminal organisation have a website in the first place?

For a split second Grigori Koslov thought that maybe he should have one too. Perhaps he also should list all his employees? Maybe it was some new government regulation?

But then he remembered who he was. He was the Evil Emperor, with a vast network of illegal businesses. He did not give a fig for the law! And anyway, the law in Russia had been a feeble, toothless pussy cat since the collapse of Communism. They couldn’t force him to put up a website if he didn’t want to!

But there it was. He had Googled ‘Highgrove Park Residents’ Association’ and got their website. Unbelievable.

If it was an off-shoot of Boris Zolkin’s organisation it must be a scam or a cover-up for some villainy.

He checked the addresses. They all seemed genuine. If he put them into Google Earth he got their exact location. He could even see the houses themselves.

But what was this?! They were all situated around the two houses he had bought! What was going on? Had Boris Zolkin positioned his henchmen to surround Grigori Koslov’s property? Property which he had bought with his own hard-fought-for money?

Of course he never intended to live there, but the palace that he was going to erect in that green bit of London would act as a base for his operations in the UK. The vast mansion that he had designed himself would be a signal to Boris Zolkin and Ivan Morozov to MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS.

It did occur to Grigori that the ‘Residents’ Association’ might be exactly what it said it was, but such was his hatred for Zolkin and Morozov, that he simply could not believe that this wasn’t their work.

In truth, Grigori had become so used to seeing the dark side of everything that he could no longer see the obvious. Suspicion and double-dealing had so deformed his mind that he had become, quite honestly, as mad as a hatter.

Only his wife, Eva, knew this, and she wasn’t going to tell anyone.

Another thing Eva knew was how much their lack of a family had weighed on her husband’s mind. She, herself, had no desire to have children, but Grigori had always wanted a son. That was why he had adopted that idiot Anton Molotov. Well he hadn’t actually officially adopted him, but he had taken the young man under his wing some years ago, when he took him on as a night-watchman.

She could see that her husband liked the boy from the moment he first saw him. Perhaps Anton reminded Grigori of himself as a young man? They had a similar build and a similar outlook on life, except that Anton wanted to be a concert pianist back then, whereas Grigori had always wanted to be a villain. But they both wanted to reach their goals with the least possible effort.

Eva could see her husband becoming more and more fond of the young man. It was so unfair. He didn’t love her. He never had. But she was convinced he loved Anton.

Couldn’t he see that the young man was a fool? Couldn’t he see that the young man was incompetent? Anyone else who worked for Grigori would have been out on their ear years ago. If they were lucky. More likely they would have quietly ‘disappeared’ by now.

But Grigori overlooked all Anton’s defects. He forgave every bungled task. He excused the young man and encouraged him.

Slowly but surely, Grigori was turning Anton into the son he didn’t have. Perhaps he didn’t realise he was doing this, but Eva still felt the pangs of jealousy. She grew to hate and despise Anton in direct proportion to her husband’s fondness for him.