Widows

Chapter 21

Linda was feeling pleased with herself. After a phone call to Brands Hatch racing circuit and a bit of flirting and digging around, she’d managed to find out where Jimmy Nunn lived. And it turned out that no one had seen him for a while: the mechanic she’d spoken to had said he’d be grateful if she’d jog Jimmy’s memory about the fifty quid he owed him. I bet he’s a right charmer, she thought, recalling the way her Joe used to charm small ‘loans’ off dozens of people so he could take her away for a posh weekend.

Now, Linda sat in a Greek cafe in Old Compton Street, looking out of the window waiting for Dolly. When Linda had called Dolly at the convent, the Mother Superior had been sitting just yards away and Dolly had been in no position to question why Linda was asking for a meeting just for the two of them, and out in the open. Dolly will be dying to know what on earth was so important, thought Linda, smiling to herself. For a change, Linda was looking forward to seeing her. She was the one with something to offer; she was the one who should be listened to, just like when she brought Bella into the team. She felt powerful.

As Dolly’s Merc pull up opposite, Linda waved to the cafe owner for two more coffees. She watched Dolly, Wolf tucked under her arm, pop some coins in the parking meter and stare across the road at the little cafe. Just come in, you snooty old cow, it’ll be worth the trip!

Dolly sat down opposite Linda, stony-faced. She couldn’t stand the heavy smell of cooking fat and fried food, hated the way the smell of these greasy spoon cafes lingered on your clothes. The Greek owner carried the coffee over, spilling some into the saucers, and wiped his hands on his filthy, food-stained apron. The Demis Roussos hit ‘Forever and Ever’ started up on the jukebox; the record was scratched and sounded tinny over the cheap speakers.

Dolly looked at the dirty rim of her small espresso cup with distaste and waited for Linda to start talking.

‘Do you know Jimmy Nunn?’ Linda asked, knowing this was unlikely.

‘Never heard of him,’ Dolly replied.

Linda decided she’d better get to the point pretty quick. ‘I think he was the fourth man. The one who did the disappearing act on our fellas.’

Dolly said nothing. She waited for Linda to speak again.

Linda slid a folded piece of paper wrapped around the photo of Jimmy Nunn she’d taken from Shirley’s photo album across the table to Dolly, like a spy delivering a secret message. ‘He’s an ex-racing driver friend of Terry’s. That’s his address. Thought you might want to suss him out, seeing as you’re the boss. Then I think we should all have a meet, don’t you?’

‘I’ll say when we have a meet,’ said Dolly. ‘And this one being in public might not be doing us any favors, Linda.’

‘You’re a dab hand at losing the filth by now, ain’t ya?’ Linda said.

Dolly ignored her. She read Jimmy Nunn’s address, glanced at the photo, and then put them in her coat pocket.

Linda continued. ‘I didn’t knock on his door or speak with neighbors. I just parked up and watched for a bit, but I never seen him come or go. I bet your life he’s the fourth man you’re looking for, Dolly. Bet you he’s the bastard who left our men for dead.’ She sat back and waited for Dolly to say something... something like, ‘well done’ or ‘good work.’

‘Waiter!’ Dolly summoned the cafe owner over. ‘I’d like some biscuits, please.’ When they arrived, she leaned down and started feeding them to Wolf.

Fuck, thought Linda. Had that blabbermouth Shirley already told Dolly about Jimmy Nunn because of his connection to Terry?

Dolly broke off another piece of biscuit, fed it to the little rat and then looked at Linda.

‘You’re not the only one who’s been playing detective,’ Dolly said. ‘Why did you lie to me?’

In that split second, the power dynamic flipped right back. Linda could feel the sweat building on the palms of her hands. ‘I ain’t lied, Dolly,’ she said. ‘Me and Shirl found Jimmy Nunn’s picture in an old album and—’

‘Not about Jimmy Nunn,’ interrupted Dolly. ‘I’ll deal with that from now on. I’m talking about your new boyfriend. Carlos, isn’t it?’

Linda was taken totally by surprise. She could feel the warmth rising in her cheeks as her face flushed red.

‘You haven’t told him anything about us, have you? About what we’re doing?’ Dolly demanded.

‘He’s not a boyfriend, Dolly. He’s just that mechanic I had a bit of a thing with after I bought the car,’ Linda said. ‘That weren’t nothing.’

Dolly’s stare burned into Linda’s soul, a strange mix of anger and disappointment. ‘You stood on that beach, looked me right in the eye and told me you were seeing no one.’

‘It was none of your business,’ Linda bit back, lighting a cigarette. As she sucked hard on the cigarette, she wished she’d never bothered calling Dolly at all. Why the hell was she more bothered about Carlos than Jimmy Nunn?

‘Why do you think I asked about him?’ Dolly said. ‘You think I want to know about your dirty sex life, or do you think maybe I’m trying to protect you? Protect all of us.’

The smile slipped from Linda’s face. She knew she was about to be put in her place and, once again, she hadn’t seen it coming. She stared at Dolly, waiting for the big hit.

‘Carlos works for Arnie Fisher,’ Dolly said. ‘Your lover boy, Linda, is a little queen; a poof hopping from your bed straight into Arnie’s. Apart from servicing Arnie Fisher as his bum boy, Carlos also services all of his dodgy motors. He’s as bent as they come... in more ways than one.’

Linda was numbed into silence. The name Arnie Fisher rang round her head. The thought that he was having sex with Carlos made her feel physically sick. Her mouth dried up and she didn’t notice her burning cigarette dropping ash on the table. Dolly fed another piece of biscuit to Wolf, giving Linda time to absorb what she’d just said.

Eventually, Linda’s brain caught up. She attempted a smile and drew on her cigarette. ‘I don’t believe a word you’re saying.’ But although she hated Dolly sometimes, Linda knew that she’d never lied. Ever.

‘Boxer Davies told me,’ said Dolly. ‘Before someone made mincemeat out of him. So when I asked you about Carlos at the beach and you said you weren’t seeing him anymore, I knew you were lying. I chose not to say anything cos we had a heavy day ahead and I thought you might wise up of your own accord... but no. You just race from one stupid decision to another, don’t you?’ The short pause Dolly left before continuing was excruciating for Linda. ‘What car were you sitting in when you were outside Jimmy Nunn’s flat?’ Dolly was going in for the kill. Tears welled up in Linda’s eyes. ‘Were you sitting in your own car by any chance? The car Carlos helped you repair? The car he’s seen parked outside your flat, and outside your place of work, and outside this cafe that you called me to so the whole world can see us together? Was it that car, Linda?’

Linda wanted the ground to open up and swallow her whole. But still Dolly didn’t let up, even as the tears rolled down Linda’s face.

‘You’ve been a stupid little tart, but it stops right now, you hear me? I’m the boss for a bloody good reason. Now, before I tell you what you’re going to do next, I’m going to ask you a question. I’ve already asked it once and this time you’ll answer. Did you tell Carlos anything about what we’re up to?’

‘I swear I haven’t. Not a word. On my life, Dolly...’ And Dolly knew this was true.

‘You’re going to get rid of him, Linda.’ Dolly said.

For a second, Linda thought Dolly looked and sounded like a mafia boss ordering a hit. ‘How do you mean?’ she asked in a pathetic, croaky voice.

Dolly wanted to get hold of her by the scruff of the neck and knock some sense into her. ‘Well, I ain’t on about concrete boots, if that’s what’s going through your stupid brain. He’s the Fishers’ wheels man, right? He must have a garage full of hot cars.’

Linda’s mouth dropped open. ‘You want me to shop him to the Old Bill?’

‘One phone call, Linda. Get them to raid his place. Today.’ Dolly stood up and tucked Wolf under her arm. ‘And don’t you ever lie to me again.’ Dolly turned and started to walk away, but paused and looked back at Linda, sitting with her head down, staring at the cigarette ash floating in the cold espresso in front of her. She looked totally defeated. Dolly still didn’t feel sorry for Linda, but she did need her to get her act together and get rid of Carlos. ‘Thanks for Jimmy Nunn’s address,’ she said. ‘I’ll look into it.’

Linda sat alone at the table. On the other side of the cafe, the Greek and three swarthy builders were eyeing her up. She felt disgusting. Stupid and disgusting. It had taken less than five minutes for Dolly to turn one of Linda’s proudest moments into one of her most shameful. She fucking hated Dolly Rawlins! She was a horrible, horrible woman. Horrible for not having a heart, and for crushing Linda’s in one conversation. She hadn’t needed to use terms like ‘bum boy,’ Linda thought; she did it because she was a sad, old, hateful witch of a woman.

Her right hand found the gold necklace and the pendant of Sagittarius the archer that Carlos had given her. He’d made her close her eyes as he slipped it over her head, kissed her gently and settled it into the hollow of her neck. She loved it. She loved him. They’d made love, standing, watching each other in the mirror. In the morning, Carlos had left before she woke, leaving a note saying he’d see her after work. But now all she could see in her mind’s eye was Carlos kissing Arnie with those same luscious Italian lips.

That bitch, that twisted bitch! The pain Linda felt was unbearable. She tried to expunge the image of Arnie and Carlos from her head but she couldn’t. She twisted the necklace until the gold chain snapped. A small trickle of blood ran down her neck where the archer’s bow had cut her skin, and she wept.