You Don't Know Me

28

I get the feeling you lot are waiting for the ending. And one of the last things my brief said to me was ‘Don’t let them lose interest’ and I don’t know if you lot are maybe losing interest. But I am getting there, really and truly. Just give me a little more time yeah? So where was I?

That’s right. The Spooks thing. Anyway it was the day after that whole thing that Curt comes knocking on my door.

‘So it looks like the shit is heating up,’ he says. ‘Face’s lot is combing the ends looking for Guilty. This thing’s about to happen.’

‘Good,’ I say, ‘about time.’

The way we figured it, the sooner those two mans knocked each other out, the better. It had been nearly ten days now of being locked up in my flat. The walls felt like they were closing in and all the space in between them felt poisoned. We hadn’t had a clean breath since this whole thing began except for that day at Mum’s. We needed it to be over. All it needed to end was for it to start. The two gangs take each other out and we are home free. We just had to hope that with that kind of war going on Face would be too busy to be wondering about the girl with the light eyes. With luck one of the Glockz might even finish him off you get me?

Things even have begun to feel more positive in my mind. I look over to where Ki is sitting on the sofa and it’s obvious she is much calmer now that she’s seen Spooks. She seems even like nearly her old self. I feel like she is more in focus, less faded. The edges of her are becoming sharper.

I look across at her and say, ‘A few more days, a couple of weeks maybe and this shit’ll be over babe.’

She looks up from her book and hooks into the conversation like she’s been listening all the while.

‘Face and the Olders are way too bad for Glockz from what you say,’ she says calmly.

‘Bad? Face by himself would be bad enough. But with a crew behind him? This shit is going to be dirty. Those boys are medieval,’ I say.

‘Well isn’t that a problem for us?’ she says, putting the book down next to her on the sofa and blinking slowly at me.

‘What you getting at Ki?’ I say, hating the way that she saves her punchlines like this.

‘Is Guilty going to die?’ Ki asks.

‘He’s getting iced for sure,’ says Curt, interested enough now to put his spliff down.

‘If he’s dead,’ she says cool as, ‘who’s going to take care of Face?’

We pause, just looking at each other and breathing in the silence.

What Ki was getting at was that the plan only worked if the two gangs cancelled each other out. If Face survived and Guilty got killed, Face would still be looking for us. The only thing that interested Face was the money and it would only be a matter of time before Face realized that Guilty didn’t have the money. We had the money and that meant just one thing. With Jamil whispering into Face’s ears, about who was behind the shooting, Face would soon come looking for us. All of us. Me, Curt and Kira.

Of course we already knew this in a ways. But what me and Curt had hoped though was that in the crossfire, Face might catch a couple of bullets. Maybe, we thought, it would be enough for Face that he had won a gang war. You know maybe he would be happy with just that and a chance to do his own taxing on Glockz.

‘We can’t do shit about that though,’ Curt says at last. ‘Face and his crew are like Terminators. They unstoppable.’

‘But that don’t mean they can make bullets bounce off them,’ I add, wondering if maybe there could be a way of stopping Face’s crew.

Curt rubs his face with a huge paw and then says softly, ‘I don’t know man. Maybe they can.’

Ki pulls her cardigan round her shoulders and then stands up straight after thinking a moment.

‘Then we have to do something,’ she says, ‘to slow Face and them down.’

Slowing down Face was one of them easier-said-than-done tings. How were we supposed to slow down Face? For one thing we were in hiding. We couldn’t even roam the streets freely you know what I mean? We were stuck in this place. For another thing, Face’s Olders crew was proper big mans gang. Guns and shit. I mean proper guns. MAC-10s. Sub-machine gun kind of gun. What could we be doing against that? I said something like that to Ki.

‘Got any ideas?’ I then add looking at Ki.

‘Me?’ she says.

‘Well, maybe I mean all of us,’ I say quickly looking at Curt.

‘Point taken,’ she says as if asking us to come up with ideas is like the stupidest thing she has ever heard, ‘but I tell you one thing I am not sitting here just waiting to be killed. And we have Mum to think about too or have you forgotten that?’ she adds.

‘And Bless,’ Curt says under his breath. Ki and him exchange a look like there is something they are not telling me.

‘Yes and Bless,’ she says picking up her phone which has pinged through a message. ‘Look I can’t think cooped up in this place. I have to get some air,’ she says quickly.

‘You can’t leave. It’s too dangerous,’ I say but with a look that shows her that I am not having any more of this bullshit where she just walks out for hours like she did when she went to see Spooks.

‘It’s okay. I just need somewhere quiet to think,’ she says though and begins to put her coat on. I need to work on my look I think. It’s like she is trying to not understand my daggers.

‘Blood,’ I say to Curt with my hands out urging him to do something.

‘Not me bruv,’ he says.

‘It’s okay. I’ll go somewhere quiet.’

‘Like where?’ I say concerned. I do not want to risk her getting seen. Not now that it’s so hot. Not hot hot, it’s England. I mean hot like the heat is on us.

‘Maybe the church,’ she says.

‘The church? Round here? On Sunday? You crazy?’

Ki stops as if she is taking in the sense of what I am saying. Church in Camberwell on a Sunday is busier than McDonald’s.

‘Why not try the mosque?’ says Curt, ‘that ain’t going to be busy on Sunday is it? I’ll drive you down there. I got to drop in on Bless anyway,’ he says and then adds after a beat, ‘and your mum.’