Searching for Someday

thirteen

YOU WANT ME to set him up with another woman.”

Kennedy shared a glance with Arilyn. They had gathered at Kate’s house after work to go over the expo and play catch-up. They lounged around her living room—Arilyn cross- legged on the throw rug, Kennedy stretched out on the sofa, and Kate holding her throne in her recliner. They wore comfy sweats and T-shirts, and had already blown through most of the large cheese pie. A bottle of Chardonnay held only a few dregs left. The television droned the last credits of a weepy chick flick. Kate had lost the bet and Arilyn had won. Steel Daisies or something ridiculous like that. Robert snoozed contentedly in his doggy bed next to his bunny, still sated on the remains of the pizza crust Arilyn and Ken sneaked to him.

Kate had to give them credit; they’d left her alone most of the week and refused to pose questions regarding her night with Slade. She’d avoided telling her Kinnections crew in order to buy a bit more time to settle her emotions. She knew it cost Ken the most. Her friend actually had an eye twitch, bursting at the seams for all the details, so she’d finally broken down and invited them over for pizza night.

“Yes,” Kate finally answered. “I want you to set him up with another woman.”

Kennedy tapped her fuchsia nails against her lip and waited a few beats. “You did sleep with him, right?”

Kate gave up and gave in. “Yeah, I did.”

Ken arched a brow. “Well? Details, please. All of it.”

She sighed and briefly went over their encounter. Silence beat in the room for a while as her friends processed the information.

“God, Kate, you had a frickin’ orgasm your first time?” Ken groaned. “You are so lucky. It took me forever to even discover why women liked sex in the first place.”

Kate tilted her head. “No way. You didn’t climax your first time?”

Ken snorted. “Not even close. Until I met bad boy Caleb Street. He was three years older and drove a motorcycle. I snuck out one night from my window and he took me for a ride.” She gave a lusty sigh. “What a ride it was. After that I swore off nice men forever, they’re too disappointing. How about you, Arilyn?”

Arilyn shifted her strawberry hair to the other shoulder. “Nope. He didn’t even know what a clit was, let alone how to find it.”

Kate smothered a laugh at her friend’s crass statement. “Wow, I had no idea it was that hard. Actually, he gave me three.”

They stared at her as if she’d sprouted two heads. “Three?” Ken choked out. “He’s a master.”

Heat bloomed on her cheeks, but she felt a weird type of pride in her lover’s expertise. “Yeah, too bad my being a virgin totally freaked him out. I mean, really, what’s the big deal?”

Arilyn shook her head. “He was probably feeling too close to you. When men bond, the first thing they do is try to cut the ties. Sort of like a wolf caught in a trap. They’ll chew their own paw off just to get free.”

Ken laughed. “Nice visual. Hell, it’s not like you told him you loved him and wanted to get married. You were super cool about it. Okay, so let’s go over the summary one more time. You had amazing sex, he acted like a dick, you kind of broke up, and now you want me to keep him in Kinnections and find him other dates?”

“Correct.”

Arilyn leaned forward and rested her thumbs on her knees. “Sweetie, do you think that’s healthy? Maybe we should just cut him loose.”

“No. We need a crop of new women. I made a tactical error thinking I could force Slade to believe in love, but we’ll never win that battle. We need to match him with a woman with the same philosophies. He’ll feel safe with her, and perhaps be able to open up to a long-term relationship.”

Arilyn nodded in agreement, but Kate knew she was already reaching for her counseling tools. “Okay, if that’s what you truly want. You’re ready to release him to another?”

“Yes.”

“Bullshit.” Kennedy glared and stabbed a finger through the air. “You’re into him. We tried this before, and he ended up at your front door and took you to bed. What makes you think it won’t happen again?”

Kate crossed her arms in front of her chest. “We understand each other now. Realized we want different things. Besides, we needed to get the sex out of our system.”

“Did it bring back the touch?”

Kate snagged her wineglass and drained it dry. “No,” she muttered.

Her friends let out deep sighs. “Aww, shit,” Ken said. “I really thought the sex would do it. What did your mother say?”

“One visit was enough, thank you. She almost got me arrested by sneaking a joint into my purse. I refuse to bother her with this. We’ll just move forward and see if it comes back. Besides, we’re set up for success with or without my extra benefit. Let’s not lose sight of the goal.”

Arilyn nodded with enthusiasm. “Kate’s right. This is happening for a reason to lead her in the next step of a journey. We’ll be patient and open. Let the universe guide us.”

“Me and the universe do not have the same understanding. I find success happens when you kick the universe’s ass and do what you want,” Ken said.

Arilyn gave her a pointed look. “Maybe you need a session of hot yoga.”

“Maybe I need a session of something else hot but much more pleasant.”

Kate fought a grin. “Are we in agreement? Ken will take over Slade’s matchmaking and we’ll move on.”

Ken blew out a disgusted breath. “Fine. I think this plan sucks, but I’ll do it for you. At least he was nice enough to watch Robert so you could go to the expo.”

The image of waking up in Slade’s house flashed before her. Tucked in the blanket with Robert at her feet, she felt safe. Taken care of. He hadn’t tried to drag her into bed or leverage their sexual attraction.

She pictured them having a cozy breakfast together and completely lost it. There was no way she could continue fighting her instinct to surrender to him. So, in the middle of the night, she’d packed Robert up and sneaked out like a bad one-night stand.

She wondered if he missed her when he woke up. She wondered if he even cared or thought twice, or was just relieved he wouldn’t have to deal with her company.

Yeah, she was officially nuts and nuts about him. She had to set him up with another woman before it was too late.

“Oh, look, 9 to 5 is on!” Ken shrieked.

Kate swiveled her head. The classic female buddy movie always made her laugh. Arilyn jumped up and down with excitement. “I love this movie! We need more wine.”

“I’ll get it.” Kate trudged to the kitchen to snag another bottle. “My favorite is when they all get high and imagine creative ways to kill their boss.”

“I love when they wheel the dead body out of the hospital and get caught with it in the trunk!”

“Wait!” Kennedy called out. “I have an idea.”

Kate and Arilyn looked at each other. “That’s never a good thing, Ken. Your ideas usually involve breaking the law or cute boys.”

Her friend practically preened. “It’s girls’ night. We need to let loose. And I bet Kate still has that joint Madeline gave her. Don’t you, chickie?”

“You want to get high?” Kate shrilled.

“Hell, yeah. Go get it.”

Kate paused only a moment. Arilyn looked intrigued by the idea. And for a little while, she didn’t want to worry about Slade or rules or anything. She wanted to hang with her best friends and let loose. “Okay, I’ll get it.”

She scooped it out of the zippered pocket of her purse, searched her junk drawer for matches, and brought it into the living room. They all sat close together around the battered coffee table as Dolly Parton strutted her stuff in the boss’s office.

“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” Arilyn muttered. But she took the joint, sucked in a deep breath, and held it. Kate and Kennedy giggled like teenagers and passed it around.

“You should’ve seen Slade’s face when it rolled out of my purse!” Kate said, inhaling hard.

“What did you say?” Arilyn asked.

Kate snorted. “I denied the whole thing! Said it wasn’t mine!”

That collapsed them into more laughter. “Why do men have to make life so complicated?” Kennedy grumbled, expertly plucking the joint between her fingers and placing it against her lips.

Arilyn let out a dreamy sigh. “Because they’re the other half of us. It’s supposed to be complicated.”

“Is your new yoga teacher complicating things for you, Arilyn?” Ken asked slyly.

Kate studied her friend’s blooming cheeks. “Are you having an affair with your instructor?” she asked in surprise. Arilyn was hard-core when it came to not dating her instructors or students. She held herself to a higher standard than others.

Arilyn frowned and gracefully stole back the joint. “I had a relapse. Once. Twice. Okay, maybe a few times.”

Ken leaned in. “How fun. Are you hiding it from everyone? Do you do it in his office or after hours?”

“Maybe.” Kate laughed. Arilyn was always able to surprise her by challenging Ken’s gutsy questions. “Let’s just say Downward Facing Dog will never be the same for me.”

Ken sucked in a breath. “You go, girl.”

“It’s nothing long-term. He doesn’t believe in monogamy, so I won’t be staying with him for long.”

Kate let out a long breath. “Slade doesn’t either. He believes in oxytocin. A hormone that’s emitted after sex and disguised as love.”

Arilyn pushed the joint into her hands. “Here, sweetie. Have another hit.”

“Thanks.”

“I say we don’t need any men. I say screw them.”

Kate nodded at Kennedy’s booming statement. Funny, her head was floating a bit off the top of her shoulders, but she looked good that way. Almost like a fairy. “Yeah, you’re right. We don’t need men at all. All we need is each other.”

“And good movies,” Arilyn chimed in.

“And wine,” Ken declared. “Forever and ever!”

“Girl power!” they all shouted.

She didn’t remember what happened afterward. The room drifted, warm and cozy, and her friends voices were like music in her ears. She floated to a happy place, where she didn’t care about Slade Montgomery or his next date or his stupid oxytocin. From now on, she’d concentrate on her own journey and have fun and maybe eventually find someone who loved her back.

Someday.

“YOUR PLACE LOOKS GREAT, Jane. So do you.”

Slade took in his little sister with a bit of a pang. She was different. Yes, still sweet underneath, a bit shy, but she walked with a feminine confidence he’d never seen before. He was definitely screwed up. All he’d wanted was for her to stand strong on her own, but now he felt as if she didn’t need him anymore.

Jane smiled and pushed over the chips and dip, his weakness. The place was small but happily cluttered, with various books, papers, and magazines scattered among antique tables, a deep sectional, and a tiny breakfast nook that held French doors opening onto a patio. Spring tinged the air with a teasing freshness, and he pictured her outside planting a garden. She always had a green thumb but couldn’t really experiment with their place in the city. From the eclectic pottery and watercolors, he finally caught a sense of Jane’s true taste.

“Thanks, big brother. I told you I would be okay. Verily is the perfect fit for me. I’m even taking a pottery class on the weekend, and Brian is teaching a creative poetry workshop I plan on attending.”

Her work always drowned out most of her social activities, and she’d been afraid to push outside her social barriers. Now, she seemed relaxed in her well-fit jeans, Coach sneakers, and sequined black T-shirt. Her hair had been tamed and pulled back to accentuate the strong lines of her face, and her trendy new glasses brought out a confident edge she’d never exhibited before.

Slade grabbed a handful of chips. “So, tell me about this Brian.”

Her gaze narrowed, probably from past experience. “Don’t start.”

He laughed and threw his hands up. “I’m not, I promise. I really just want to know about him. I have no intentions of sticking my nose in your personal life anymore.”

Jane wrinkled her nose. “Why?”

“Because you seem happy and healthy.” His voice caught with emotion. “That’s all I ever wanted.”

Her face softened, and she snagged his hand to give it a quick squeeze. “Thank you for that. Brian is great. Kate said we were moving a bit fast, but she seemed to trust my judgment. We get along well, have similar interests, and decided to be monogamous.”

“Hmm, it’s only been two weeks, though, right?”

“Slade.”

“I know, sorry. Hard habit to break. Just listen to your gut. If you feel like he’s going too fast, slow it down. You’re in control.”

“Got it. Right now I’m going with the flow and enjoying every moment.”

Worry nagged at him. Kate was definitely keeping an eye on his sister, especially if she made that comment. Maybe he should talk to her briefly about Brian. Not to cause any trouble, but to make sure Kate realized the implications if this guy wasn’t being careful. How many times did men throw themselves into a relationship only to get spooked when they realized it was the real stuff? It was a weakness in his gender he knew quite well. Slade glanced at his watch. Maybe he’d drop by her house, check on Robert, and ask some innocent questions.

He spent the next hour catching up and snacking before he made his way out. Should he call first? What if she told him not to come by? Ever since that morning, it seemed they had an agreement to stay away from each other. Kennedy already had a date lined up for him this Friday night, and there was no real reason to contact Kate.

Still, he was in the area and he really was a bit concerned about Jane.

Slade maneuvered his way through the town. Crowds spilled over the sidewalks, walking dogs, lingering with coffee at outside cafés. The river flowed, the frost and ice finally broken up, and the bridge gleamed in the partially cloudy sky. Funny, he was actually growing to enjoy the little town. A bit eclectic, with artists sporting purple hair, piercings, and tattoos galore, but at the same time there was a level of acceptance and positive energy flowing through the crooked streets. He passed a sign advertising hot yoga and winced.

Her Fusion was parked in the driveway when he pulled up. He fought the urge to swipe his palms down his pants and wondered what the hell was wrong with him. Nothing to be nervous about, just a quick stopover to chat about his sister.

He rang the bell and waited.

When she opened the door, he knew why he’d been wary.

She took his breath away.

Hair caught up in a ponytail, face bare of makeup, she wore black yoga pants, Reebok sneakers, and a baggy yellow T-shirt. Her blue eyes widened when she caught sight of him. Her presence jacked his body to life, and he tamped down the urge to step through the door, haul her into his arms, and kiss her senseless. She was so frickin’ beautiful and real.

“What are you doing here?”

“Came from visiting Jane. Wanted to check on Robert.”

Of course, it was almost two weeks that had passed, and he knew the infection was completely cleared up. Her brow hiked as if she suspected his lame excuse, but she opened the door anyway. “Come on in. Robert, Slade’s here!”

The scurry of paws echoed through the air. The dog raced over to him and crashed into his open arms. Slade laughed, petting him, then leaned over to press his forehead to his. “Hey, buddy. I missed you. Feeling good?”

He barked once.

“I’ll take that as a yes. Do you still have Bunny?”

Robert turned, vanished into the living room, and charged back with the tattered, sopping-wet bunny in his mouth. A fierce pleasure pounded through Slade, knowing the dog still loved the gift.

Kate shook her head and grinned. “It’s his favorite thing in the world. I insisted on washing it the other day, and he waited in front of the dryer for half an hour.”

His throat tightened. “I’m glad.” He straightened up and hungrily took her in. Her cheeks were flushed, but he figured she’d been exercising. Thinking it was over him would hurt too much. “Am I interrupting?”

She shifted her feet. “I was going to take Robert to the dog park. Let him run a bit.”

“Oh.” He stared at her like a teenage chump. “Maybe I can come with you? I want to talk to you about something.”

Kate hesitated and pulled her lower lip between her teeth. His gaze focused on those lush, pale pink lips and he wished to hell she was sucking on something else. “I guess so.”

Her reluctance made him grin. Always trying to get rid of him, even from the first. “Great. Let’s go.”

He reached for the cart, called for Robert, and deftly hooked up the straps. She grabbed two water bottles, a NY Mets ball cap, and headed out the door. Their long strides ate up the pavement as they walked into town, and the wheels of Robert’s cart steadily whirled. “Baseball fan?” He pointed to the cap perched on her head. Damn, she looked adorable with her ponytail bouncing.

Kate laughed. “Nah, Gen’s sister Alexa is a huge Mets fan. She gives out gear for birthdays and Christmas.”

“Hope her husband isn’t a Yankees fan.”

“Uh, yeah, better not go there. How about you? Sports guy?”

“No time. But I watch the Olympics.”

“Hard-core.”

The dog park was half filled with a variety of breeds. Kate opened the gate, which housed a large lawn, various toys, and huge water bowls. Exchanging greetings with the other owners, they leaned against the gate and watched Robert take off in his cart, whizzing round and round with his ears pinned back and his tongue lolling in ecstasy. Slade relaxed, chuckling at the simple pleasures of taking a walk on a beautiful early spring afternoon. Usually he was at the office catching up on work, at the gym, or trying to do something halfway productive.

“What did you want to talk to me about?”

Oh. Right. Back to the real goal of his visit. “Jane. I just came from her house.”

Kate let out a sigh. “You know I can’t discuss her situation, right?”

“No, this is different. She told me she’s dating this guy Brian, a poetry teacher, and things are getting a bit intense. Said you advised she was going too fast. What did you mean by that comment?”

She watched Robert run and seemed to mull over her answer. “I can’t give you much without breaking confidentiality. I always counsel my clients on diving in too fast, just in case. I always advocate slow and steady because it seems to work better for the percentages of successful relationships.”

He strummed the gate with his fingers. “Do you think she’s in any trouble?”

Kate shook her head. “Jane seems fully capable of handling the situation. That’s all I can say for now, which was probably too much.”

He nodded. “Good enough.”

“That’s it?” she teased. “You trust me now? Don’t think I’ll raise my prices and make Jane mortgage her apartment?”

He studied her face, her soft smile, and shining eyes and wondered if he’d ever get over her. “I trust you, Kate.”

The words drifted softly in the breeze. She stiffened, recognizing the hidden meaning in his statement, and she stepped closer. Time stopped. Sexual energy swarmed and pulled them together. Helpless to resist the spell as luring and sweet as spring, he bent over and touched his lips to hers.

The kiss was gentle. Undemanding. A slight brush of the lightest touch, whisper soft and as heady as a shot of adrenaline on a bungee jump. Her eyes darkened to a stormy navy blue. He scented her arousal from here, and his nostrils flared with the need to take, claim, possess.

Instead, he swallowed a curse and drew back. He didn’t apologize, and she didn’t demand one. They stared at each other for a while, until Robert’s barking broke through their bubble and dragged them back to reality.

“Want to visit the doggie bakery?” Kate asked.

Robert barked twice.

“Somehow, I don’t think that was a no,” Slade said. “Let’s go, buddy.”

They strolled into town. Stopped in the bakery for Robert and got him a frosted, organic peanut butter donut and a pepperoni twist for later. The Swan Pastry shop was next door, and Slade dragged her inside and bought a bag of biscotti, honey almond, double chocolate, and lemon divine. They munched and weaved their way through the crowds, admiring art in the windows, and spent almost an hour in the secondhand bookshop. The smell of leather and paper hung heavily in the air, and he breathed it in like a drug. He purchased a biography of FDR and got her The History of the Pit Bull, which featured a glossy photo that looked exactly like Robert.

After a satisfying lunch at the hot dog truck, they sipped chocolate mochas and then headed back. The wind grew crisp and the sun disappeared, signaling an end to the idyllic day. When he stopped in front of her house, regret pierced him. He wanted to come inside, cuddle up on her worn-out recliner, and watch the sunset. He wanted . . .

He cut off the thought and forced the words out. “I have a date tonight.”

She stiffened. Then nodded. “That’s good. Who with?”

“Tammy. I spoke with her on the phone a few times. Seems nice. Different from the others—a bit older and seems to hold similar philosophies.”

Slade ached for her to meet his gaze, but she ducked her head and concentrated on finding her keys. “Ken knows what she’s doing. I hope it works out. Thanks for keeping me company today.”

“Thanks for telling me about Jane.”

“Welcome.” The key slid in the lock and she opened the door. “See ya.”

He petted Robert good-bye and watched them disappear. The light went on in the living room, and soon the sounds of the TV drifted through the half-open window. He stood on the pavement for a while, looking in before finally turning away.

This time, he didn’t look back.

TAMMY.

She hated her already.

Kate stabbed her spoon into the small carton of Chunky Monkey and shoved it into her mouth. Why did he have to appear on her doorstep today of all days? Before his date with another woman who was probably perfectly matched? She’d been fine these past two weeks. Better than fine. She was almost cured of Slade Montgomery, and that wicked one night, and decided she may even want to date. Soon. Very soon.

But now he screwed up her head again, with those gorgeous jungle eyes, and sinful mouth, and tousled golden hair. His scent was a delicious mixture of ginger and spice that made her want to howl like a bitch in heat. She wished she had never introduced him to the idea of jeans, because those Levi’s molded his ass and showed off his other assets. Assets she had personally explored and enjoyed. Assets that weren’t hers anymore.

Assets that Tammy better keep her hands off of.

Kate fumed and ate. She glared at the TV where The 40-Year-Old Virgin played and didn’t even gain a chuckle. If Steve Carell failed, she was doomed. Even the extra fudge chunks weren’t helping.

Groaning in defeat, she wondered if she should climb out of her sweats and go out. Mugs was still open, and a call to Kennedy would give her a date. She could have a few beers and socialize instead of sinking into a black depression alone, regarding a man who was not meant for her.

Life kind of sucked.

The idea of putting her feet into boots instead of her fuzzy slippers confirmed her choice. She finished the carton, tipped back two glasses of wine, and let her mind fade into television numbness. Somewhere she read that every hour spent sitting and watching TV cut off her life by two minutes. Oh, goody. Maybe she’d be done with this hell sooner rather than later.

Forget it. She’d go to bed early, switch off her brain, and be better in the morning. And she’d be much more careful about letting Slade into her house or even engaging in a conversation. He was too dangerous, and she was an addict.

Kate shut off the TV, turned out the lights, and stomped to bed.

“I’M SO GLAD WE finally set this up.”

“Me, too.” Slade gazed at the woman across the table. Her black hair was fashionably short and her smile real. She liked the gym, worked as an attorney in property law, and was divorced. So far, the date had gone perfectly, and he honestly liked her.

“I’m surprised you’re open to a matchmaking firm,” she commented, cutting into her steak. Her appetite was so much better than those of the other women he took out. Not as good as Kate’s, of course, but still worthy of his need for consistent gourmet food. “I interned for a divorce firm in my younger days and it’s a real bitch. Kind of ruins your idea of a happy ending.”

Surprised at her astuteness, he grinned. “Yeah, I got slightly singed along the way.”

“More like roasted, I bet.”

He chuckled and took a sip of wine. “Let’s just say I’m open to the idea of a companion. Someone without high ideals but willing to date and explore a relationship on rational terms.”

She nodded with approval. “Me, too. Freaks me out when a guy starts talking about his biological clock or settling down. I love my work, my life, and have plenty of hobbies. But sharing it would be nice. Seeing what happens.”

“Exactly.”

Ken had hit the jackpot. Not only did he like Tammy, she was attractive and matched his sense of humor. The pieces he’d been searching for clicked into place. They finished dessert—the woman actually had cake without an apology—and made their way out of the restaurant. She chattered a bit as he walked her to the car, and Slade hesitated. Should he invite her back? No, better off waiting for the next time. And there’d definitely be a next time.

“I had a great time. Do you want to go out again?” she asked.

“Definitely. I’ll give you a call this week. I’m glad we met.”

“Me, too.” She lifted herself up on tiptoe and gave him a peck on the lips. “Good night.”

“ ’Night.”

He watched her pull away. He was back on track. This was the type of woman he needed in his life, one who understood him, knew how life worked, and was eager to meet him halfway. He got into his Jag and started home.

Cranking up the radio, he listened to Daughtry croon about the start of something good, and pictured his future. Partner at his law firm. A beautiful, intelligent woman sharing some good moments. Jane happy. His designer apartment. Life was indeed good.

The words of the song hit his ears and his gut at the same time. This was what he wanted, right? What he had always wanted? This was the best it was going to get.

He thought about his afternoon with Kate. About Robert. About the empty ache in his gut that never seemed to get full, no matter what food he ate or alcohol he drank or work he did. He remembered when he touched Tammy, and the pleasantness of her company, and how on every rational level she seemed the perfect fit.

But she wasn’t Kate.

He was in love with Kate.

The knowledge sank in and tore at his flesh like talons. No. Not possible. He didn’t believe in love, or at least not in love that lasted. She’d wreck him to pieces and make his existence a mess. She’d turn him upside down and inside out and never stay in the carefully drawn lines of his life.

Tonight, he didn’t care.

Tonight, he needed her. Craved her. His blood roared in his veins, and he stomped on the accelerator, making his way toward Verily. Time passed in a blur, and Slade felt drunk as he finally reached her house and stumbled out of the car. Vision blurred, he pounded on the door, and waited.

She stood on the threshold, her arms clutched around a short, silky robe thing. Pink fuzzy slippers. Her hair tumbled over her shoulders and her eyes were sleep blurred as she stared at him. Her mouth formed a little O of surprise, and she shifted from one foot to the other as if trying to decide to invite him in or slam the door in his face.

“The date was perfect. Tammy was perfect,” he said.

“Then go to her. I can’t do this, Slade. I can’t.”

Her voice broke and he was lost. He stretched out his hands in surrender. “I don’t want her, Kate. I only want you. I’m . . . empty without you.”

She blinked. A sheen of tears threatened, and he waited for her to push him away and retreat for safety.

Instead, she reached over and pulled him into her arms.

Her body was on fire. Soft flesh hit his chest, surrounded him. He groaned deep in his chest and took her mouth, drowning in her taste, plunging his tongue deep to drink and drink, wondering if he’d ever be sated.

He kicked the door closed with his foot, lifted her up, and took her into the bedroom. Ripped his clothes off, tugging at her robe until her breasts were bared to his sight. Her nipples peaked hard and tight, and he sucked them into his mouth, licking, biting until she arched and cried out in pleasure. Her scent soaked his nostrils and the connection between them seethed with electricity. She opened her thighs to him and his fingers dove into the sweet honey, coating her clit and teasing her to that first climax. She shuddered and dug her nails deep into his shoulders. Slade watched her come apart with a fierce satisfaction, but he was nowhere near done, barely skimming the surface of what he wanted to rack from her body. He kissed his way down her stomach, parted her swollen lips, and rubbed his mouth over her pussy, scraping his jaw on her quivering inner thighs, licking and sucking her clit until she pulled at his hair and writhed beneath him, surrendering to her second climax. He gave her the suction needed to keep the orgasm going, pinning her thighs down to the mattress and licking her slit, his fingers still working in and out of her channel, trying to drag him in. His dick throbbed, but he refused to be done yet, wanting to immerse himself in every part of this woman who had crashed through each barrier he’d carefully built. Slade fumbled for the condom in his pants, rolling it over his erection, and pushing her wide apart, slid home.

She clenched him in a silky vise, and he groaned, the sensation of being held so tightly inside her sheer heaven. He kept still, enjoying her wet heat that tried to burn him alive. Slowly, he eased back all the way, thrusting back in to the hilt and keeping the ride easy and slow. She fought him like a wildcat, arching up and trying to take him faster and deeper, but it was too good, too sweet to be over. He added a bit of friction to her swollen clit, and she dug her heels into his back, twisting madly from side to side. Slade laughed low and sucked on her nipple, scraping his teeth against the hard tip as he picked up the pace. Faster and faster, his hips pistoned and moved until he hit the sweet spot and she screamed out, bucking under him. His fingers twisted hard within hers as he held her down and slammed into her again and again, the piercing pleasure so erotic it bordered on pain, taking him to the edge and over until he exploded.

He spilled his seed and ripped her name from his lips. Skin damp with sweat, he rode out the last of the aftershocks before slipping out. Kate collapsed into the sheets, arms and legs flung wide as her breath came in and out in choppy waves. He got rid of the condom, climbed back into bed, and pulled her close. Laying her head against his chest, she wrapped her arms around him.

“Don’t leave me tonight.”

Her whisper made him pull her closer. “Don’t want to. I’m staying.”

She snuggled closer and they slept.

KATE MOVED HER LEG and bumped against something hard. Inching her hand down the mattress, her fingers wrapped around a very proud erection. She murmured with pleasure as she surfaced from sleep, and stroked him from root to tip. Like steel sheathed in smooth satin, she enjoyed the texture and strength of his arousal. Groans rose from his chest and he thrust into her palm for more.

With a wicked grin, she ducked her head under the blankets and found him with her mouth. His breath hissed through his teeth, but Kate was far gone, lost in his musky taste. She licked and sucked him, swirling her tongue around the tip, while her hands pumped up and down his length.

His fingers worked its way into her hair and held her, giving himself up to her ministrations. Power surged through her, and she opened wider, until he slid to the back of her throat and his balls tightened.

“Kate!” Her name was ripped from his lips, amid hard pants. “Condom, now.”

“Where?” she teased, swirling her tongue around his leaking tip.

“Ah, God, pants pocket. There!”

She reached down, grabbed one, and sheathed him, never breaking contact or the rhythm of her swirling fingers. Already wet and aching for him, she climbed on top, spread her legs, and sank down onto his length.

Kate threw her head back as the delicious sensations skittered over her skin and teased her clit. So good. The heat between them only added to the edge, pumping up the tension. She looked up his body and got trapped within the seething burn of his green eyes.

“Ride me, baby. Ride me hard.”

She shuddered and obeyed. He cupped her breasts and rubbed her nipples as she ground herself against him, closing in toward her orgasm, pumping her hips as her gut clenched and her skin prickled and her nipples tightened to hard, achy points.

Slade grasped her hips, moved her forward, and slammed her back down. Once. Twice. Then—

“Slade!” She came hard, and he kept guiding her up and down, extending the orgasm into mini convulsions. He shuddered beneath her and followed, and she ached for the feel of his skin against hers, ached to get rid of the condom and take his seed deep inside her body. She slumped over him, completely boneless, and he stroked her back with soothing strokes.

“Best morning wake-up ever.”

She laughed and bit his shoulder. “Hmm, better than my coffee.” Two sharp barks made her crane her neck. Robert looked up with endless patience and wide eyes that took in her bare ass. “Oops, sorry, baby. I’ll take you out.”

“Want me to get him?”

She pressed a kiss on his lips. “Nope, I got him. Be right back.” She donned her robe, ignoring his hungry gaze and keeping her distance before she jumped back in bed and Robert had an accident. She took him out, ground the coffee beans, and got the pot started.

“Kibble or wet food this morning?”

Two barks.

“Kibble it is.” Kate filled up the bowl, humming under her breath, and turned to a spectacular sight framed in her kitchen doorway.

Slade Montgomery. Buck naked. Thighs braced apart, hands on hips, his impressive erection confirming round five was about to come up. She drank in all that raw male beauty, with his flat stomach, defined pecs, and toasty brown skin. His lazy gaze probed under her robe and stroked her body.

“Thought I was better than your coffee.”

She pursed her lips with interest. “I did say that, didn’t I?”

He cocked a hip and that’s not all that got cocked. “Maybe I need to prove my worth again.”

She licked her lips and dropped her gaze. “I think your worth is pretty damn big.”

“Flatterer.”

She loosened her robe and began to pull it open. “Counselor. I think—”

“Honey, I’m here! Whose car is in the driveway? Oh!”

Her mother stood before them, open-mouthed, staring at Slade with, first, astonishment and then pure appreciation. She closed her mouth and broke into a wide grin. “Oh, honey! You’re finally getting some—I’m so happy.”

Kate yanked her robe closed and jumped in front of Slade. “Mom, what are you doing here?” She grabbed for the blanket over the couch and thrust it into Slade’s hands. He wrapped it around his hips, but the broad, loopy holes in the afghan didn’t hide much.

“I haven’t seen you since I got back from my sex conference and thought we’d have breakfast together. But I see you’ve already taken care of breakfast. I must say, it’s even better than Wheaties!”

Color flooded her face. Slade studied her mother with a fascination she was used to, as if an exotic, otherworldly creature had just burst through their universe. Madeline wore a canary-yellow top, a cream lace skirt that flirted with her knees, and lace-up sandals. Her floral headband held back her white blond hair, and bangles jingled on her wrists. Robert ran over to say hello, and Kate took the pause to push Slade behind the counter so at least his bottom half wasn’t exposed. Madeline watched his retreat with a twinge of disappointment.

“Sex conference?” Slade drawled, glancing back and forth. “How interesting. Forgive Kate for not introducing us. I’m Slade Montgomery.”

Madeline marched over and stuck out her hand. “A pleasure to meet you, Slade. I’m Madeline. I do apologize for interrupting, my daughter rarely allows herself to enjoy these opportunities.”

Kate groaned. “Thanks, Mom. Umm, maybe you want to call me later?”

Slade steepled his fingers together as if he were in a business meeting. “Nonsense, stay and have coffee with us. We’re in no rush.”

“I’d love to. Is it those organic beans I bought you, dear?”

This was so not happening. Kate glared at Slade, but his delighted grin told her he was having too much fun. “Yes, I’ll get it for you.” She stomped over and poured her mother a mug, then slid it over the granite countertop.

“May I ask how the conference was?” Slade asked.

“It was truly wonderful. I’m a sex therapists, so it’s important for me to keep up with the new techniques. I learned many ways to unblock a man toward orgasm. Have you ever had problems with impotence, Slade?”

Kate gave him credit. He didn’t even choke on his coffee. “Happy to report that’s a negative.”

“Hmm, I’m not surprised from what I caught. Still, many men suffer from the condition and it’s usually some mental block. They taught us certain moves to go about breaking down barriers.”

“What a fascinating job. Kate never told me.”

“I’m not surprised. Kate’s been blocked for years.”

“Mom!”

“So, tell me how you two met.”

“I’m a client at Kinnections,” he said.

Madeline sucked in her breath. “You’re not the divorce lawyer, are you?” she whispered.

Slade hiked a brow. “You know about me? Kate, how sweet. I had no idea you told your mom about us.”

Kate squirmed with sheer frustration and shot him a glare. “Look, Mom, let’s not talk about this here, okay? I’d like to keep this whole thing private.”

“But darling, this is the one you experienced the touch with! You’ve found a way to make it work, I’m so happy. We’ll need to clear a bit of that negative karma, but if you’re sleeping together, I’m confident in the outcome.”

“Touch?” Slade frowned. “What touch?”

“Nothing.”

“Kate didn’t tell you?” Madeline chirped. “She has a gift that’s run in our family for generations. A sixth sense for matching people. She experiences a jolt of recognition when she meets a couple meant to be together.”

Slade stilled. Kate barely breathed, hoping she’d become the guy from The Time Traveler’s Wife and disappear through space. “Has she ever experienced the touch for herself? Or is this just for other people?” he asked.

The disaster loomed before her, like a volcano ready to erupt, and she was just as helpless to stop her mother as she was to stop the forces of nature. Madeline laughed as she played with her bangles. “Silly man. It’s you, dear. She connected with you—you’re her soul mate. I wasn’t too thrilled regarding the divorce lawyer thing, but the universe is more powerful than humans, and we must bend to its will. At least you overcame your initial protests. Denying the touch is dangerous. Who would’ve known what could happen? Your cousin Rose died alone and miserable.”

Kate swung her head around. “You said you didn’t remember what happened to my cousin! You said it was a family secret never spoken about.”

Madeline sighed. “I lied. I didn’t want to tell you she died an old cranky spinster, destined for unhappiness since she refused to believe in her gift. I think she owned about fifty cats and no one came to her funeral except the local pet shelter representative.”

Kate buried her face in her hands and gave up. The morning had started out so rich with promise. Sex. No pesky virginity trouble. Denial galore regarding their future relationship. Now, big, bad reality was here to stay. And Slade looked like he’d swallowed a sharp object and was just about to dial 911. Kate wondered which caused more horror—her virginity or her touch. Definitely a tie.

Slade cleared his throat. “Funny, I didn’t hear about this before.”

“Kate didn’t tell you? Maybe she was easing you into it. Some men have trouble believing in the concept of soul mates and love forever till you die.”

This time he choked. Kate pounded him on the back until he seemed back in the land of humanity. “Mom, I think Slade and I need to talk.”

“Of course, I really am sorry I interrupted.” She blew an air kiss to them and headed out. Her bangles clinked and Robert gave her a quick lick good-bye. “Why don’t you two come for dinner one night? I promise not to smoke any pot if it makes you uncomfortable, and you can meet my new lover, Richard. You’ll adore him.”

“Sounds great. ’Bye, Mom.”

“ ’Bye, darling.”

The door slammed. She waited in the dead silence, wondering if he’d just leave now or stick around to ask a few questions. “She gave you the joint, huh?”

“Told you it wasn’t mine.”

He nodded. Took a big sip of his coffee and straightened to full height. She remembered another requirement in his perfect companion. No embarrassing family members. Yep, she had officially blown every item on his list to smithereens. “Is that the reason I get an electrical shock when we touch? Because of this gift?”

She gave him the space he seemed to need, though her chest hurt. She’d been crazy to think an extra night of mind-blowing sex would solve their issues. Already, she tried frantically to shore up the gaping hole in her chest, but she needed bricks because the big bad wolf had already blown down her first two attempts at shelter. “Supposedly.”

“Didn’t want to mention it before, huh?”

A flare of anger pushed away the grief. “Actually I did, at your first mixer.”

“A few more details would’ve been nice.”

“Oh, sure, let’s see how that dialogue would go. ‘By the way, Slade, I have a witchlike gene that senses when a couple is meant to be together. And guess what? You’re the one for me! Sorry about the shock, but isn’t that great, when’s the wedding?’ ”

He narrowed his gaze. “You could have tweaked the speech a bit, but yeah, maybe that.”

A humorless laugh escaped her lips. “I wanted to pretend it never happened. I begged you to stay away from me, remember? You’re the one who knocked on my door last night! I was ready to try and move on, forget this—this thing between us ever occurred. We’ve been mismatched from the beginning.”

“Do you believe in it, Kate? Believe you can match the right couple just by touching them? Is this what you built your company on?”

Ice trickled down her spine. His tone flicked with disbelief and already she sensed his distance. How could he believe in something that was almost as magical as love? Something undefined but full of hope? The question tore through the last of her defenses, and suddenly, Kate realized she had nothing left to fight. She could tell him the gift was gone and she had no idea if it was coming back. She could deny the whole thing, laugh it off as some crazy joke her mom played, and save her pride. Instead, Kate gave him the truth.

“Yes. I’ve used my gift to guide many people together. I’ve sensed if it’s a true and proper love match. I never experienced it with myself, though. Until you.”

He jerked back and coffee sloshed over the rim of his mug. He shook slightly as he mopped it up with a towel. “I can’t deny what’s between us,” he finally said. “But do I believe in this type of love-spell witchery? No. How can I? Do I believe we were meant to have a happy ending just because we got a shock when we touched? Do you know how that sounds?”

She huddled into her robe, desperately longing for warmth. Her skin chilled and goose bumps broke out on her arms. Yes. It sounded juvenile and silly. But it was the truth, a truth he’d never believe or believe in. She opened her mouth to defend herself and end the conversation. Retreat to her isolation and lick her wounds one final time. Then finally get over Slade Montgomery. For good.

The phone interrupted them and beat out the seventies version of the pop song “We Are Family.” He cursed. “My sister. I better get it.”

She nodded and turned away. The murmur of conversation drifted to her ears. Kate wiped up the counter and refilled Robert’s water bowl, numb to the rapidly rising conversation. She had no time to transition before Slade stood in front of her, male fury vibrating from his figure in raw waves.

Her heart skipped. “What’s the matter?”

“I have to go. Jane was very upset on the phone. Seems this guy you set her up with—the one who was pushing her for more—broke up with her this morning.”

Her hand flew to her throat. “Oh, no. What happened? Is she okay?”

His face tightened. Green eyes held an accusing light that churned her gut. “He explained he’s just not that into her, not for a long-term relationship, and took off after spending the night. Is this the type of operation you run? Did you use your magical power to set Jane up with this asshole and tell yourself it would all work out?”

Pain sliced deep. She leaned slightly forward to catch her breath. “No! We set her up with two dates and she preferred Brian, but there’s no guarantee each date or relationship will work out. Let me come with you, I’ll talk to her, maybe set her up with a session with Arilyn if she’s upset.”

“No, you’ve done enough.” His voice flicked like a whiplash. “You still don’t understand, do you, Kate? She’s not made for this. I almost lost her once because I didn’t take care of her. I wanted to trust you, even though my instincts told me she could get hurt again.”

“Slade—”

“She’s all I have left!”

His words shattered around her. Her throat tightened, and she caught a glimpse of a raw vulnerability and fear swirling in those green eyes. He’d lost most of the women in his life. Kate realized his responsibility toward his sister was so much deeper than she imagined. When he loved, he gave everything. Unfortunately, he didn’t believe he was enough for any of them. As much as she wanted to make him stay, to beg him to talk to her and open up, she knew it had to be on his terms. Perhaps he’d never be ready for more.

He disappeared into the bedroom and came back out dressed, hair mussed, jaw full of stubble. He remained cool and distant, as if she were someone he didn’t recognize any longer. “I need you to leave her alone, Kate. Please.”

He walked out without a glance back.

Robert whimpered and slid over, pressing his warm body firm against her leg in full support. She sank down to the floor and put her arms around him, laying her cheek against his flat head, and soaked in his presence.

SLADE WATCHED HIS SISTER and tried not to panic. Her eyes were red and puffy, and the box of Kleenex on the side was getting a workout. Crumpled balls littered the floor. Her bare feet peeked out from her long terry cloth robe, an old favorite she used to wear around the house when she needed comfort. He flexed his fingers and tried to remain calm. He’d stay all day and all night if possible. Hell, she could move back into his apartment, get her old job back, and leave Verily behind. He’d do anything in his power to make her feel better.

Her lower lip trembled when she finally looked at him. “I feel so stupid,” she sniffed. “He kept pushing us to spend more time together. Asked me to spend the night. Invited me to his class to speak. I knew Kate was right when she mentioned we were moving too fast, but I was so happy I just wanted to believe it would work.”

Helplessness rattled his core. “It’s not your fault; the guy led you on and dumped you without a hitch. Kate should’ve seen this coming. Why was he a client there anyway? And why the hell would she have set you up with him?”

“Not Kate’s fault. I could’ve picked Tim, who also seemed super nice, but Brian had a bit more edge, which I thought was exciting. Arilyn warned me in counseling not to leap too soon. She said I tended to do that in my past as a way of ignoring some of my blocks and hang-ups.”

He growled under his breath. “You’re fine the way you are. That asshole is the one with a problem.”

A watery smile curved her lips. “Thanks, big brother. I’m so sorry I dragged you out of bed this early. I got too used to calling you when I’m in trouble. Hard habit to break, I guess.”

“That’s what I’m here for, Jane. To take care of you. Listen, I’ve got this whole thing figured out. You can move back in with me and get back on your feet. I’ll get your money back from Kinnections and you start with a clean slate. Hell, I bet your old job will beg you to come back.”

Jane frowned. “What are you talking about? I’m not moving back with you.”

He leaned forward and rested his hands on his knees. “Just for a bit, not permanently. Hell, I’ve got a better idea. Why don’t we go away for a mini vacation? Clear your head a bit. I’ll have the movers take care of your apartment, and we’ll pretend the whole thing never happened.”

Her eyes widened like she was staring at a troll rather than at her brother. “Are you crazy? I love my job, and I love Verily. I don’t need a vacation.”

He tried to speak gently. “You shouldn’t be alone right now. Not after what he did to you.”

She shook her head hard. “No, Slade, I think you misunderstood. Yeah, I’m pissed and upset that Brian ended up being a jerk. I didn’t see it coming. But I’ll be fine. That’s what women do. Bitch, cry, eat ice cream, get drunk. The girls at Kinnections showed me I can be normal, let my emotions run free, and still be okay. I’m not having a breakdown, and I’m sure I’ll get right back in the dating scene once I get over this.”

He gritted his teeth and tried not to lose his temper. What were they selling over there at Kinnections? Didn’t they realize she was fragile? When her relationships ended, she plunged into a black hole of blame, thinking she’d never be enough. He’d learned to avoid the minefields by protecting her, but after the suicide attempt, he never allowed her to stray too far. Yes, she’d finished years of therapy and declared her independence, but what if she was at the tipping point and he failed her? “I’m glad you’re being reasonable about this, I really am. But I think it would be better if you stay with me for a little while.”

Her tears dried and her chin lifted. Uh-oh. That tone snapped into place and suddenly she didn’t seem fragile at all. “I’m not going anywhere. God, this is my fault. I should’ve never called you.”

Slade flinched. “No, I’m glad you called me. I want to be there for you.”

“Listen, love sucks sometimes. Doesn’t mean I don’t believe it won’t eventually work in the end. I’ll always regret putting you through an emotional roller coaster, and I know you want to protect me. But I don’t need your help anymore. I can handle this on my own now.”

He studied her for a long while. He’d taught himself she was like delicate china, yet . . . she didn’t seem that breakable. Not like before. Was it possible her strength was greater than he realized? That somehow, along the way, she’d blossomed into a full woman who could handle life’s curveballs on her own? “I don’t want to let you down again,” he whispered.

Jane blinked back tears. “God, Slade, are you kidding me? You’re the only one who never let me down. The reason I can believe in love, that I believe in myself, is because of you. You taught me that. I watched you through your divorce, through Mom’s and Dad’s deaths, through years of counseling brokenhearted couples in your career. You never lost your heart. You’re a caretaker, and now I’m ready to take the reins. Do you understand? You’re the one who saved me.”

Her words reached deep and broke open a mass of emotions he’d pushed down for years. The truth stunned him, the idea she could actually believe in him, that somehow along the way, he’d done something right and good. His throat tightened and it was a while before he could speak. “Thank you.”

She smiled at him, her face open and lit and beautiful. “You’re welcome. Now, as the best-friend cliché you’ve now become, would you run out and get us bacon, egg, and cheese sandwiches? They have this great deli right down the block. Oh, and hash browns!”

Slade chuckled. “Done. I’ll scoop up a few of those awesome doughnuts while I’m there, too.”

“Great, you probably haven’t eaten. Hey, how did you get here so quickly? It took you under ten minutes. Where were you?”

The image of Kate naked and sprawled on top of him, taking him deep within her body, flashed before him. “Umm, stopped by to see Kate about something.”

A tiny frown creased her brow. “This early?”

“Yep. I’ll get going.”

“Stop right there, buddy.” Jane crossed her arms and studied him with the scary teacher look that made him shake. “Holy crap. You’re sleeping with her!”

He clenched his jaw. “Was. Not anymore.”

“Oh my God, I didn’t see this coming. But in a weird way, you’re perfect for one another.”

Slade gave a bitter laugh. “Hardly. I don’t think they can create two people who are so completely different. Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

“Did Kate say anything about having a special gift? When she set you up with Brian, did she, uh, touch you or say she felt a spark between you two?”

Jane shook her head. “Nope. I never heard anything like that. They use a pretty scientific approach. On paper and from a few conversations, Brian seemed perfect. But they warned me ahead of time that it’s a journey that could take some time. And I’m okay with that.”

“Good. I’ll be back with the sandwiches.”

He headed out the door and wondered if he had made a huge mistake. Blaming Kate for his sister hadn’t been right. They were both right: there were no guarantees. Kinnections did nothing wrong except believe in something his sister did, and he had no right to blame Kate or hold her responsible for what happened.

His head throbbed when he thought of the way he’d left. Two for two in the dickhead department. But it had just been too much for him to handle. First, her mother, then a magical power, then Jane. And where did that leave them?

Slade didn’t know. And for the first time in his life, he didn’t know what to do about it.