Bound

CHAPTER NINE

BUT Amery didn’t hear from Ronin that night.

Or the next day.

Or the next night.

And she’d be damned if she’d call him first. It wasn’t a childish thing, but rather an adult thing. Accepting that she could have casual sex and not feel guilty. Granted it’d been amazing sex, best sex of her life. Now that she knew firsthand she wasn’t an iceberg in the sack, maybe she could jump back into the dating pool.

Over the past three years she’d been focused on building her business, and not wanting the distraction of a relationship was a valid reason for remaining single. But she could admit part of her reluctance had been fear. Tyler’s parting shot scared her. “You’re fucked up, Amery. You’ll never be normal because you’re afraid your daddy will find out you like sex. The only time you get on your knees is to pray, and what man wants to live like that?”

Well, fuck that and fuck him. She didn’t want to be normal. She wanted to be outstanding. She had friends. She had a good life. She had lots of things to be thankful for. And she’d damn well celebrate it and not wait for a man to swoop in and make her life complete.

So early Sunday morning she showed up for the yoga in the park class she’d always wanted to attend. Afterward she walked around, savoring the gorgeous summer day. Happy families, happy singles, happy dogs. On the way home she decided she’d throw a dinner party. After she invited her friends and tallied up the number of guests plus more for last minute add-ons, she stopped at her favorite market to load up on food. Fresh pasta, ingredients for a basil cream sauce, loaves of French bread, the makings for a salad, and double chocolate brownies.

Amery quickly cleaned her house and cranked the tunes while she prepared the food. As she was trying to figure out where everyone would eat without ending up in the office space downstairs, she had a crazy idea. She had roof access through a narrow staircase.

She checked it out. It’d be cooler up here once the sun dropped. And there was a decent view of the city blocks to the north. The space wasn’t in the same league as Ronin’s, but it’d do for tonight.

Emmylou and her latest squeeze—a big-breasted blonde with a Marilyn Monroe vibe—showed up early and helped her. They dragged two conference tables up to the roof, covering them with sheets of brown paper and scattering mismatched candles in funky containers. Wrapping clear Christmas lights around the ductwork added a little chic to their shabby. Galvanized garbage cans packed with ice served as coolers for the BYOB party. Then they hung a sign on the alley door directing partygoers upstairs to the roof. She made sure to arm the system and lock access to the office space. Still, it felt weird leaving the back door unlocked, especially after the recent break-in.

After checking her watch, she scaled the stairs and cut to her bedroom to get ready.

By the time she’d piled her hair into a messy bun, fixed her makeup, and changed into her party sundress with the floral poppy print, her guests were arriving.

Chaz brought his latest friend with bennies, a sweet musician named Andre. He’d also invited his neighbors, two straight guys named Jake and Lucas. Rich and Larry, a couple she’d met through Chaz, arrived with booze. Emmylou’s friends Roz and Josie, also Amery’s clients, showed up next. Suze and Mark, the married couple that lived in the loft next door, came and brought Suze’s parents, who were visiting from Seattle.

A lot of people. Good thing she’d made a ton of food.

Molly, always so punctual, showed up last with her date, Sandan Zach from the dojo. Amery hid her shock, and resisted asking if Zach had seen Ronin. She discreetly gave Molly two thumbs-up. Ronin must not have an issue with teachers and students dating—since he was the one who’d initiated things with them.

Things. Just say it. Sex. You had rocking sex with the man, no regrets, no promises.

As she was slicing bread in the kitchen, Chaz’s arms came around her and he squeezed. “Great idea. Perfect night, great company, the food smells amazing, and you’ve created your own rooftop nightclub, which is so fantastic I may sleep up there tonight.”

“Thanks.”

“Where’d you get the idea to host this shindig on the roof?”

She couldn’t tell him about being inspired by Ronin’s secret rooftop garden, so she hedged, “It’s been a long time since I had a par-tay, and I wanted to do something different. Isn’t it fun to see who our friends bring?”

“Or who doesn’t show up.” He swiped a slice of bread and dipped it in the garlic butter before she could swat him. “So, where’s your hunkalicious Master Black tonight?”

“No clue. And he’s not my Master Black. We banged the headboard a couple of times and that’s it.”

Chaz forced her to look at him. “What’s really going on, North Dakota?”

He called her that when he wanted her attention. “Nothing.” She smiled. “It’s all good. I promise. Now, do you think we should haul the food to the roof? Or serve it down here?”

“Down here. Definitely.”

“Would you be so kind as to ring the dinner bell?”

After everyone had gone through the chow line, Amery fixed herself a plate and headed to the roof.

Applause greeted her. Then Emmylou raised her wine cooler. “A toast to the excellent hostess, Amery Hardwick, for arranging such an awesome dinner party. For feeding us and for welcoming old friends and new.”

Amery blushed when everyone toasted her. “I’m just glad you all came and brought friends, or I’d be eating pasta for the next three weeks.”

Laughter.

She seated herself across from Larry and Rich.

Larry patted her arm. “We missed you this week. Chaz said you dragged him to a different bar for happy hour Friday night.”

“Dragged? Please. Chaz put up a token protest. He’s been forcing me to go to Tracks for years. And as much as I love hanging out with you guys . . .”

“Trust me, sweets, I understand. Finding a straight guy who regularly hangs out in gay bars usually means he’s not entirely straight. I don’t blame you for casting a wider net.”

“Did you meet anyone at the bar Friday night? Or did Chaz scare them all away?”

Amery laughed. “He scared them away. You should’ve seen the pants he was wearing.” She kept an eye on her guests while Larry and Rich bickered good-naturedly over a TV show, their cockapoo, Fritzie, and Larry’s pesky mother. She shoved her plate aside.

Chaz’s neighbors, Jake and Lucas, sat on either side of her with their dessert. She gestured to Larry and Rich. “Have you guys met?”

“Yes. Chaz is acting as your cohost tonight if you hadn’t noticed,” Rich said.

“I’m fine with that. I’m flying solo anyway.”

“Beautiful woman like you?” Jake said. “How’s that possible?”

She turned her head to study him. Tall. Good looking. Dark hair and dark eyes. Sweet smile. But he did nothing for her. Not the way Ronin did.

Stop thinking about him.

“So, Jake, I admit I’ve got a total mental blank about what you do for a living.”

“We bankers are either villains or ghosts.”

“Now I remember. Investment banking.”

“Specializing in small businesses,” he added.

She smiled at Lucas. Equally attractive. Sandy brown hair, green eyes, freckles, and dimples, but she felt no zing of attraction. “And how about you?”

“Professional mud wrestler. This is the cleanest I’ve been in weeks.” He paused and grinned. “Just kidding. I run an at-risk management system for kids with a history of truancy.”

“That’s noble. Does the program keep them in school?”

“Our attendance numbers have gone up significantly, which is encouraging, and they increased our budget this year. Not to bring up business at a social event, but we’re looking at upgrading our existing pamphlets with a hipper design to appeal to our demographic. The kids complain what we’ve got is lame and straight out of the 80s. Since you own a graphic design business, would you be interested in pitching an idea?”

Amery never turned down the possibility for new work. “I’d love to. Can you get me copies of the existing brochures and all your promotional materials?”

Lucas said, “Hey, Chaz, buddy, can you come here and bring your murse?”

Jake snorted. “Watch him get bent out of shape about his man purse.”

“It’s not a murse, you moron. And you don’t get to make fun of my messenger bag since you asked me to put something in it,” Chaz sniped. He lightly whapped Lucas on the back of the head with it before dropping it on the table.

“Sorry.” Lucas turned and grinned at Amery. “Just because it doesn’t have flowers and rhinestones on it doesn’t mean it’s not a purse.”

Amery bit her cheek to keep from laughing.

“Anyone need anything from the kitchen?” Chaz asked. When no one answered he disappeared into the roof-access doorway.

Lucas slid the envelope in front of her. “It’s all right here, including my contact info. Take a look and let me know either way if it’s something you’d be interested in. We could discuss specifics over lunch.”

“Thank you. I will.” They discussed national ad campaigns, arguing good-naturedly about the impact of social media versus traditional media outlets.

Jake made the time-out sign. “The truth is no one knows what works.” He beamed at Amery. “I’d be happy to discuss what does work in the business world—having your banker as a partner. I’d love the chance to pitch to you on why you should switch your business banking to Western National.”

What was up with these two tonight? They’d hung out a few times the last year and they’d never come on this strong.

Maybe after being with Ronin Black you have sexual confidence you’ve been lacking and men take notice.

“Look who I found wandering around downstairs,” Chaz said.

Amery turned around and Ronin stepped into view.

Speak of the devil.

“Chaz invited me up,” he said to Amery.

Of course he didn’t ask permission to join the party or explain what he’d been doing wandering around in her alley in the first place. Or why she hadn’t heard from him at all in the last two freakin’ days.

Immediately Sandan Zach stood, offering Ronin a slight bow. “I wasn’t expecting you to be here tonight, sir.”

“You’re not the only one.” He shot Amery a slightly sheepish smile. “I’m glad to see everyone is enjoying Amery’s hospitality.” Ronin moved to stand behind her. Keeping a proprietary hand on her shoulder, he offered his hand to Jake. “I’m Ronin Black. And you are?”

Jake seemed flustered as he introduced himself. As did Lucas. Amery saw Rich and Larry exchange a smirk as Ronin shook hands with Lucas.

Pissed off that he’d crashed her party, she stood. “Excuse me.” She sidestepped Ronin and headed to the other table.

Emmylou had her arms draped over her date’s shoulders as they chatted with Josie and Roz. Suze from next door leaped up, intercepting her. “Amery, thanks so much for the party. My parents are having a great time.”

“I’m glad. Hey, I just wanted to say I’m sorry for not stopping over and reassuring you guys after the break-in that even the cops think it was a random incident. But then again . . . I haven’t seen much of you and Mark lately. Are you both traveling a lot for work?”

“Mark is. I’ve backed way off on my travel schedule.” She smiled serenely and touched her stomach. “You’ll see a lot more of me after the baby comes.”

“You’re pregnant?”

Suze laughed. “Five months already.”

“How exciting! I am so happy for you guys. I know you’ve wanted this for a while.”

“Thanks.” Her gaze drifted to someone who’d stepped behind Amery. One guess who it was.

Ronin slipped his hand across Amery’s lower back. “Didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but it sounds like congratulations are in order.”

“Thank you.” Just as Suze was about to ask his name, her husband, Mark, approached. As did Suze’s parents. Ronin introduced himself and made small talk.

Would wonders never cease? Ronin Black was indulging in cocktail party chitchat—with complete charm and none of that haughty sensei demeanor.

Amery murmured about checking on something and dislodged Ronin’s hand from her hip. She headed for the drink station and checked the ice supply.

Footsteps sounded behind her. “Amery? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” She adjusted the beer bottles in the ice. She kept her voice low as Molly moved in beside her. “So, you and Zach, huh?”

Molly blushed. “You told me to stop waiting for life to happen to me and go out and grab it. So I did. My knees were knocking when I asked Zach out, but I did it anyway.”

“That’s great! I’m so proud of you.”

“Thanks. I’m proud of myself for bucking up and taking that first step.” She grabbed a bottle of hard cider. “So, what’s going on between you and Master Black?”

“Nothing,” she answered honestly.

“I was really surprised to see him show up here.”

“Me too.”

“You didn’t invite him?” Molly asked skeptically.

“No. Evidently he’s above following societal norms like—”

“Making a phone call and keeping in touch about future plans?” Ronin intoned directly behind her.

Amery jumped at the sound of his voice and spun to face him. “Would you stop doing that?”

“No. You need to be more in tune to what goes on around you.”

“You need to be more in tune when someone is pissed off at you,” she snapped.

Ronin’s eyes never wavered from Amery’s when he said, “Will you please excuse us?” to Molly. He didn’t wait for Molly’s response; he steered Amery to the edge of the roof behind the duct.

Might be petulant to twist out of his hold, but she tried it anyway. No surprise she couldn’t make the man budge. “What are you doing?”

“Getting you alone so I have a chance to explain—”

“Why I haven’t heard from you since you rolled out of my bed Friday morning? Or explain why you feel entitled to crash a party I’m hosting?”

“Both.”

Silence.

“So? If you wanted to explain you’d better start talking.”

“I should’ve called you. But I promise you were on my mind all damn weekend.”

Amery got right in his face. “Not a good enough apology, Master Black. Try again.”

“Such a hardass,” he murmured. “I like this side of you.”

Her belly fluttered, she felt herself softening toward him, but somehow she rallied to keep her backbone up. “I liked the side of you that promised me no games between us. You told me you’d call; I expected to hear from you. And don’t give me some lame excuse like your cell phone died or you were out of service range.”

Ronin’s eyes changed then, from cool and detached to contrite. “The truth is I owed someone a favor and he collected on it this weekend. I wasn’t expecting it and it sapped every bit of energy out of me. You deserved better than to deal with that, especially since you’re so used to my extremely engaging and chatty side.” He brushed his mouth across her knuckles.

Even though his answer was more cryptic than she liked, she believed him, especially since he’d just proven that he could poke fun at himself.

“I am sorry.” Curling his hand around the nape of her neck, he pulled her closer.

“Ronin—”

“Ssh. Just let me apologize like this too.” He kissed her with the mix of tenderness and passion that fogged up her brain.

She intended to keep her hands by her sides, but they crept up his chest of their own accord. Within fifteen seconds of his mouth mastering hers, Amery forgot her anger with him. She forgot everything but the way kissing Ronin consumed her.

Somehow her sanity clawed to the surface, urging her to break the kiss. “Stop mauling me at my own dinner party. A dinner party you weren’t invited to.”

“I’ll behave if you let me stay.”

Amery realized he still held her hands, except he wasn’t looking at her, but across the roof. That caused her to bristle up again. “I know it’s not as nice as yours—”

He shut her up with a kiss. Then he pressed his forehead to hers. “Right now this place far exceeds the beauty of mine because it’s filled with people who care about you. My place may be twice as big, but that only makes it feel emptier when it’s just me up there. Which it almost always is.”

His vulnerability in that moment spoke to her on the most basic human level. Ronin was lonely. Maybe not always, but often enough that he understood that visceral fear that it might never change.

“Fine. You can stay. Come on. I need to see if anyone needs anything.”

“I need something first.”

Amery’s gaze snagged his. “What?”

“Your promise that I can stay with you tonight.”

“Sure. Be warned; you’ll have plenty of dishes to wash.”

Ronin flashed her a quick, boyish grin. “Had plenty of experience with that at the monastery.”

For the rest of the party, he remained at her side, being charming in his understated way. As she watched him, she noticed he kept his guard up among people, not only when he was at the dojo.

But he lowers it around you.

Now she realized what a big deal that was for him.

As the party wound down, Amery promised Lucas she’d get back to him quickly on her project proposal. Jake didn’t suggest they set up a lunch date when Ronin kept a hand on her at all times.

Since Emmylou and Marilyn, aka Sasha, were the last to leave, they offered to stay and help clean up, but Amery shooed them out.

Leaving her and Ronin alone.

First thing he did was back her against the wall. The kiss started out slow. A lazy twining of tongues. But it picked up steam and soon they were kissing like maniacs. He stopped kissing her long enough to say, “Need you naked.”

“Which is an awesome idea, but we have to clean up and put this food away first.”

“Can’t it wait an hour?”

“No. Because once I hit the sheets with you, I won’t want to crawl back out. And the thought of facing this mess on a Monday morning is crazy-making enough that I won’t enjoy getting naked with you if it’s not done.”

“Fine.” Ronin backed up. “What do you want me to do?”

“Be my pack mule. Take the tables and chairs from the roof back down into the office.”

He made a braying sound before he disappeared up the stairs.