Box

37

The phone app to start the car is amazing. The sort of thing I wish I’d invented. When you bring it up it looks exactly like the remote control that was built into the key. There are four buttons. The top one locks the car. Bottom left unlocks it. Bottom right unlocks the trunk. Center button starts or shuts off the engine. I press the center button, and the engine starts. Like I say, amazing. I put the car in gear and make my way up the riverbank. When I get to the top, I park while deciding what to do next.

I think about driving to Zander’s house, but realize I don’t know her address. I consider filing a police report, but apart from a wounded ego and the loss of what to me is a small amount of cash, it would be a complete hassle.

There are two women still in the mix: Trudy, who probably doesn’t want me now that she’s independently wealthy, and Renee Williams, the thirty-year-old kindergarten teacher whose husband ran off with her best friend. Renee being my sure thing.

Given the choice, I’d take Trudy over Renee in a heartbeat. Except that I’m ninety minutes from Starbucks, where Trudy lies in a hospital bed, currently unable to have sex.

I call Renee.

“Hello?”

“Hi Renee, It’s Gideon Box, from Manhattan.”

“Kansas?”

“New York City.”

“Gideon Box?”

“The doctor. We met on the dating site?”

She pauses a beat.

“Omigod!” she squeals. “I’m so sorry! You’re Dr. Box! Yes, absolutely! Hi! How are you?”

“I’m great.”

“What’s up, Doc?” she says, then laughs hysterically.

“Funny,” I say. Then say, “Have you met a handsome, famous movie star yet?”

“Nope.”

“How about an airplane pilot?”

She giggles. “Nope.”

“In that case, I thought you should know I’m in Kentucky.”

“Omigod! Where?”

“Have you ever heard of a place called Paducah?”

“Of course, silly! It’s not but thirty minutes from here! Can I come see you?”

See me? That happy thought hadn’t even crossed my mind.

“Yes, of course!” I say. “But I don’t have a hotel room yet.”

“You won’t get one, either. Not in Paducah.”

“Why, is there a convention?”

“In Paducah?”

She laughs. “Not that I know of. I just mean there are no hotels in Paducah. But they’ve got some decent motels. How about I jump in the car and head that way? When I get to town I’ll call and you can tell me where you are.”

“Sounds great. I’ll get a room, check in, and wait to hear from you.”

“I’m so excited, Gideon!”

“Me, too!”

“By the way,” she says, “I love your name! Gideon sounds noble, and grand. I’m sorry I didn’t remember it. I always think of you as Dr. Box.”

“That’s quite alright.”

“See you soon!”

“Can’t wait.”

Here’s what I know about Renee Williams: she’s thirty, she’s a kindergarten teacher, her husband ran off with her best friend, and she’s looking for revenge. According to Renee, the best revenge would be to have an affair with her best friend’s husband.

If her best friend’s husband was successful.

Or even good-looking.

Or even clean.

Since he’s none of those things, her first choice is a handsome, famous movie star, an airplane pilot, or a rich doctor.

She didn’t say a young, good-looking doctor.

She said a rich one.

Like I said, Renee Williams is a sure thing.