Casino Moon

37

TEDDY SAT IN Dr. Josephson’s office after the exam, staring at the edge of the brown oak desk. He felt vaguely ashamed about what the doctor had done to him.

“Mr. Marino, are you a man who can handle bad news?”

“That’s my trade,” said Teddy.

“Then let me be straight with you. I did find a nodule during the examination. And I think we need to proceed with the tests to determine whether you have prostate cancer.”

The words barely registered with Teddy. They were just pebbles falling in a deep well. He stared directly at the doctor, waiting for correction or clarification.

“I see no reason to wait,” said the doctor. “So I’d like to schedule you for a PSA, an ultrasound, and—if it’s necessary—a biopsy within the next week or so.”

Teddy blinked. “What’s a PSA?”

The doctor leaned back in his leather chair and shrugged. “It’s a blood test.”

“And what about that biopsy?”

“Well, hopefully it won’t be needed. It’s just to determine whether you have a malignancy.”

Teddy stiffened, feeling the words come closer and closer to his heart. The pebbles in the well turned into huge boulders, hurtling down. “And how do you do it?”

“Do you really want to know at this stage?”

“I’m telling you, be straight with me!” Teddy demanded, anxiety finally beginning to get the better of him.

“We usually go in through the rectum with an eighteen-to twenty-four-inch needle,” the doctor said reluctantly.

Teddy’s eyes began to water and the floor began to swim under his feet. His head felt light and he started to list heavily sideways, tipping over his chair.

He hit the floor before the doctor could say he hoped surgery wouldn’t be necessary.