Drop Dead Healthy

The Eyes

The Quest to See Better

I LOVE WATCHING THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL documentaries on the body. They’re so delightfully boosterish, they make me feel proud of this heap of bones and sinew. The narrator sells you on the human body like he’s Ron Popeil hawking the latest vegetable chopper. “The eyes can see one hundred million colors! They can focus from infinity to inches in a fifth of a second! In complete darkness, they can detect the light of a single candle fourteen miles away!”

Which really are astounding statistics.

Unfortunately, my eyes aren’t quite as astounding as the ones advertised. They’re flawed. I’m nearsighted and have astigmatism. Which isn’t compatible with my goal of being the healthiest man in the world.