Funny Children's Stories

My Friend

Gleb Paramonov

My friend Gleb Paramonov does not do too well in school. But he does not do too badly either. Though I think he could have been one of the top students. But he does not find school interesting, and he often complains to me about it.

But today he suddenly admitted to me that he liked physics lessons. He said that he loved the stories our physics teacher told us about different inventions and discoveries. And that he really liked listening to our physics teacher explain how inventors came up with interesting ideas.

And we started to remember the time when our physics teacher told us about Russian scientists and inventors. He said that they were very observant. That was why Russians made all the most important discoveries and inventions.

Our physics teacher told us how, once, the Cherepanov brothers were sitting in the kitchen while something was cooking on the stove in a large saucepan under a heavy cover. And when everything in the saucepan was fully cooked, the cover was knocked off by vapor. And someone in the kitchen said, “Wow! That's some force!”

And the Cherepanov brothers thought that vapor really is a powerful force. And shortly thereafter they invented the steam locomotive.

Our physics teacher also told us about Popov who was once sitting on the bank of a river, throwing pebbles into the water. He was looking at how the circles were spreading out and figured that perhaps other types of waves might travel the same way too. Afterwards, he invented the radio. And later everyone began to call the invention by the name of its inventor – Popov’s radio.

The physics teacher also asked us whether we knew what else Russians had invented. And one boy raised his hand and said that Russians had invented everything. And the physics teacher praised him for his excellent answer but said that he had been hoping for some specific examples.

Then another boy raised his hand and said that Russians invented the horse. He said that later, everyone began to call the horse by the name of its inventor – Przhevalsky’s horse.

Then our teacher said that he had something different in mind. He was hoping that one of us would recall Mozhaisky. And he began to tell us how Mozhaisky had looked at flying birds. But he had not looked at those birds that were flapping their wings. He had looked at those that were just hovering in the air with their wings stretched out. And he soon invented the airplane.

Then I asked Gleb whether there was anything else he liked about school. And Gleb answered that there was nothing else he liked. But he especially hated geography lessons.

Well, it was not news since I and everyone else already knew that Gleb hates geography. It all began when Gleb got a completely undeserved two in geography. And today Gleb and I once again remembered all the details of that story.

We remembered everything from the start, from the moment when our geography teacher showed up in our classroom for the first time. She surprised us from the very beginning. She entered the classroom and, for some reason, did not say “Hello.” The first thing she said was that she hated when someone did anything on the sly. And then she spent the entire class telling us that she did not mind joking. But the joke had to be witty. Only then would it count as a good joke.

When the geography teacher came to our class for the second time, she again, did not say a word about geography. She just kept telling us about how she loved good jokes and hated when someone just sat very quietly at his desk and did things on the sly.

And I did not know how I should behave in her class. I was already blamed for most of the jokes played in school, and I did not want to start with my jokes right during the first geography lessons. But I was also afraid that if I just sat there, quietly, the geography teacher would think that I was doing something on the sly.

When the bell rang, the geography teacher remembered the subject of geography and told us what we should read in the textbook for the next lesson.

She began the next lesson by telling us that she forgot to say the most important thing. She forgot to say that she hated when someone just sat very quietly at his desk and did things on the sly. And that she loved a good joke. And she asked us whether we remembered what a good joke is.

And suddenly, without even bothering to get up from his seat, Gleb said, “A good joke is when someone jokes well.”

Later Gleb confessed to me that he really thought that from that moment on, the geography teacher would never think that he could ever do anything on the sly and that she would always love him. But then something unexpected happened. The geography teacher looked at Gleb over the rim of her glasses and called him up to the blackboard. And before Gleb could even open his mouth, she asked him, “Where is the Eastern European Plain located?”

Gleb answered, “The Eastern European plain is located in Eastern Europe.”

And I was very surprised by Gleb’s quick thinking. Because neither he nor I, of course, have ever heard anything about the Eastern European Plain. But somehow it seemed that he, most likely, gave an absolutely correct answer to the question.

And I also noted to myself that Gleb did not just answer “In Eastern Europe.” Because our teachers would always lower the mark by one full grade for such incomplete answers. Instead, he said, “The Eastern European Plain is located in Eastern Europe.” So then I was only curious whether the geography teacher would ask him anything else or just give him a five right then and there.

But she looked at Gleb angrily and said, “Sit down. A two.”

After this incident, Gleb became somewhat withdrawn. And he started to say that he did not like anything about school. That was why I was very pleased when Gleb told me that he liked physics class.

And again, we started to remember what our physics teacher was telling us. And Gleb said that it was pretty cool that Russian scientists and inventors were so observant. It was great that the Cherepanov brothers paid attention to the saucepan, and that Popov watched the circles in the water, and Mozhaisky looked at the birds.

And I said that it would be interesting to ask our physics teacher how electricity was invented. Because I suspected that the person who invented electricity was probably struck by lightning. But I was a bit worried that Gleb might be offended by that.

But Gleb was not offended. He laughed and said that he was thinking the same thing. He added that the person who invented electricity must have been very observant. Because if he had not been observant, he would not have noticed that he had been struck by lightning. And then there would be no way for him to invent electricity.