Out of Turn

CHAPTER NINE

I was jerked hard to my right and shoved to the ground. Kade fell on top of me a split second before the explosion.

A wave of heat washed over me as terror licked my veins. My hearing was muffled, the explosion still ringing in my head, and Kade was a dead weight holding me down.

Oh God.

“Kade!” I struggled to move, the concrete biting into my hands and bare legs. “Kade!” He didn’t move and didn’t respond in any way. I started to panic. He’d been protecting me. What if he was hurt? Or worse?

“Oh my God!”

It was Alisha.

“Help us,” I said, thrusting an arm out from beneath Kade.

“Kathleen?” Alisha grabbed my hand. “Are you okay?”

“Yes. Please, just help Kade.”

I felt Kade’s body move as she rolled him carefully off me. I sat up in a rush. His eyes were shut, but he was breathing.

“Call nine-one-one,” I ordered. Alisha ran to make the call.

The fire was still burning inside my apartment. I could feel the heat and smell the smoke.

“Kade,” I said, pushing his hair back from his face. “Kade, wake up.” It didn’t look like he was hurt. Splinters of wood and plaster covered him, but I couldn’t see any blood. “Please, Kade. Please wake up!” I was close to hysterical, crying and shaking his shoulder to try and wake him.

Kade shifted and his eyes fluttered open.

“What the fuck?” he groaned.

A small laugh escaped through my tears and I bent my head to his chest, wrapping my arms up over his shoulders and hugging him tightly.

“You’re okay,” I said. “Thank God, you’re okay.”

His hand cupped the back of my head and I felt his chest rumble as he spoke. “I’m fine,” he said. “You?”

I couldn’t speak and just nodded, my cheek scrunching his shirt.

Sirens wailed in the distance and Kade got to his feet, wincing as he did so. My hands and knees were scraped from hitting the concrete. We rounded up Alisha and her dog, Bacon Bits, and scurried down to the parking lot. Lucky for them, the people in the apartment below mine weren’t home.

It was only as we were watching the firemen climb the stairs with the hose that I saw Kade’s back. His shirt had been burned away in spots, some as big as my palm, the skin underneath an angry red. His hair was singed, too.

“Kade, you’re hurt,” I said stupidly, staring at him.

He glanced at me, then looked over his shoulder. “It’s not bad. Could’ve been worse. Glad I had the jeans on. I know my ass is hot, but I don’t need it to be literal.” He waggled his eyebrows at me, but I didn’t think it was funny. I was angry, and scared, and I took it out on Kade.

“Why did you do that? You could’ve been killed!”

“Better me than you, princess.”

“Stop saying that!” I cried, getting in his face. “It’s not true! I hate it when you do that!” I was crying and yelling and I didn’t care what kind of scene I was making. I fisted his shirt in my hands, trying to make him listen to me.

The mischief faded from Kade’s face, a look of concern replacing it as his brows drew together and his lips twisted in a frown. “Calm down. It’s okay. Everything’s okay,” he said. He tried to wrap his arms around me, but I jerked away.

“Everything is not okay! Everything I own is up there burning. I was nearly killed. You were nearly killed. And I’m sick of it!”

I ran to where I’d dropped my purse and dug my keys out. This had to stop. I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Kathleen, wait—!”

I heard Kade calling after me, but I ignored him, running to my car and getting in. I slammed my hand down on the door lock just as Kade got there.

“Kathleen, where are you going?” he asked, trying fruitlessly to open the door.

“I’m going to make him stop,” I said, jamming my key in the ignition.

It only took a second for Kade to catch on.

“No,” he said, his face hard. “You are not going over there, Kathleen. Don’t be stupid.”

I really didn’t like being called stupid. I glared at him through the window. “Watch me,” I said, and tore out of the lot.

I drove fast—traffic rules optional. My whole body still shook, though whether it was from shock or fear or fury, I didn’t know. But I was mad. Maybe madder than I’d ever been in my life. And I knew just the person who I wanted to see.

William Gage lived in a two-story brick mansion just north of downtown, off Meridian. I wouldn’t even know where he lived if I hadn’t had to go by his house occasionally to pick up a few things when I’d first started at the firm. My memory supplied the address and soon I was squealing to a stop in the big semicircle driveway.

I jumped out of the car, not even bothering to close my door, just as Kade’s Mercedes skidded up next to me. He vaulted out, but I was already heading to the front door. He caught me around the waist at the foot of the stairs.

“Let me go!” I pulled at his arm, but it was like an iron band around my middle.

“You’re not doing this,” he said, his voice implacable.

“You can’t stop me,” I fumed, twisting in his arms as I tried to break free.

Kade lifted me off my feet. “Actually, I can,” he said.

That just sent me to a whole new level of pissed off. I kicked and fought him with everything I had, which only resulted in his other arm crossing over my chest to hold my arms down.

“Let me go! I swear to God, Kade!” I knew I was making contact with some of my hits because he grunted a couple of times, but still he wouldn’t let go. I channeled my anger and twisted around, getting my arms in between us so I could push against him. “I said, let me go.”

“Stop it, Kathleen,” he barked, pressing me tightly against him so my arms were immobilized. “I said stop!”

His words finally penetrated my haze of rage and I went limp, sagging against him. I couldn’t hold back the sobs that now engulfed me. I hid my face against Kade’s chest, my shoulders shaking.

“Shhh, you’re okay, I’m okay,” he said softly, cradling me. His lips brushed the top of my head. “Everything’s going to be okay. I promise.”

His hand slipped under my hair to the back of my neck when I pulled back slightly. “But it’s not okay, Kade,” I choked out. “Look at your back. What if—”

“No,” he interrupted. “No what-ifs. I’ll take care of it. Right now.” He stepped away, but took my hand and started for the stairs.

I followed him. When we reached the door, he turned to me. “Let me do the talking,” he said. Reluctantly, I nodded.

Kade rang the doorbell. I nervously shifted my weight from foot to foot as we waited.

“Stop fidgeting,” Kade murmured. I stilled.

The door opened and an old man, clad in a butler’s uniform, stood there.

“May I help you?” he asked.

“I’m looking for William Gage,” Kade said.

The man glanced from Kade to me and back, then said, “I’m sorry, but he’s not accepting visitors right now—”

“That’s all right,” Kade said, moving past the old butler. “This won’t take long. Where is he?”

Kade’s voice was like steel and I knew the coldness in his eyes well. The butler took a good look and didn’t question him, but just pointed to a doorway down the hall.

Our footsteps echoed on the hardwood floor as we walked down the hallway. I couldn’t take my eyes off Kade’s back, belatedly realizing my abrupt departure had caused him to forgo getting medical attention for his burns.

Nice one, Kathleen.

Kade pushed open the door at the end of the corridor and stepped into the den. It would have been a bright, cheery room if heavy drapes hadn’t been drawn over the windows. The air was stuffy and too warm. But I noticed and then forgot all that in a flash, my attention drawn to the man sitting in a wheelchair behind a behemoth of a desk.

Gage had changed since I’d last seen him, his body withered and bent. The disease was obviously taking its toll. I wished I could feel sympathy. Instead, I found myself only sorry it was taking so long to claim his life.

He looked up when the door opened, surprise evident on his face before he could conceal it. “Dennon,” he said carefully, “to what do I owe the pleasure?” Gage glanced at me and it took him a moment to recognize me, his eyes narrowing before realization struck. Then his thin lips pressed together and his face grew mottled with anger. “What is she doing here?” he hissed.

I gritted my teeth and moved forward, but Kade stopped me in my tracks, his hold unbreakable.

“She’s with me,” he said, walking right over to Gage. “I hear Blane Kirk stopped by to give you a warning about this obsession you have.” He let go of my hand to press his palms flat on the desk and lean closer to Gage. “And today you went too far.”

Gage’s smile was cold. “Oh, I wasn’t trying to kill her.” He leaned forward. “I just want to hurt her, terrify her, and make her regret the day she was born.”

I shivered, a chill spreading across my skin at his words.

“That’s nice,” Kade said, nonchalant. “It’s good to have goals. But here’s the problem. Today you hurt me.” Menace dripped from his voice and Gage blanched. “The girl is under my protection now, and I would take it personally if something were to happen to her.”

Gage recovered, his gaze hardening. “This is none of your business, Dennon,” he said.

“I’m making it my business,” Kade bit out.

“Then I suggest you watch your back,” Gage said.

Kade straightened and once again took my hand. “Your choices are your own, Gage,” he said. “But hear this—if anything else happens that so much as harms a hair on her head, my face will be the last one you see.” He tugged on my hand, pushing me in front of him as we left the room.

“You don’t scare me, Dennon!” Gage called after us. “I’m already at death’s door.”

Kade paused. “Just say the word, old man, and I’ll shove your ass right on through.”

Gage spluttered in rage, grabbing a paperweight from his desk and throwing it at us. It bounced harmlessly off the wall as Kade hustled me down the hall and out the front door.

I got back in my car, sliding behind the wheel and taking a deep breath.

Kade leaned into the open door. “Go straight to Blane’s,” he ordered. “Nowhere else.”

I frowned at him. “But you need to go to the hospital. I can come with—”

Kade was already shaking his head. “I’ve got to give a statement to the cops. We kind of ran out on them, you know.”

“Then will you go to the hospital?”

He rolled his eyes. “Fine. If you’ll do what I say.”

I nodded. “To Blane’s. Nowhere else. Got it.”

Kade stepped away, but something occurred to me and I called out to him. “Kade, wait!” He turned. “How did you know?” I asked. “You tried to warn me. How did you know?”

“It’s a trick I’ve seen before,” Kade said. “Rigging the door. They were just a little messy or I wouldn’t have seen it.”

“Where have you seen it?” I asked. I hadn’t seen a thing and even now as I searched my memory, I came up blank.

Kade seemed to hesitate before finally saying, “I guess it’s not so much that I’ve seen it before as that I’ve done it before.”

I stared at him, unable to conceal my dismay. “You’ve… blown somebody up?” I asked. I wasn’t stupid, I knew what Kade did for a living, it just rarely smacked me in the face like this had.

Kade just looked at me, resignation in his eyes, until I glanced away, unable to hold his gaze. Guilt ate at me for what I’d said. It wasn’t my place to judge him; he couldn’t change his past.

“I’ll see you at Blane’s later,” he said before closing my door. I watched him as he walked to his Mercedes, his shirt in tatters across his back, the burned skin showing through. Then suddenly I was up and running after him. I was breathless when I reached his car and knocked on his window. He rolled it down. He’d already donned his sunglasses and I couldn’t see his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” he said with a frown. “You okay?”

I nodded. “Yes, I just forgot something.”

“What?”

I leaned inside, kissing him hard on the mouth for a long moment. When I pulled back, I said, “Thank you.”

I was gone, heading back to my car, before he could reply.

I called Alisha while I drove to Blane’s.

“What the hell happened?” were the first words out of her mouth.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized. “I kind of… lost it for few minutes.”

“Can’t say I blame you,” she replied. “I’d lose it, too, if someone blew up my apartment.”

I winced at the reminder. “So what did the firemen say?”

“It was localized in your apartment,” she said, “and they managed to put it out before it spread back into your bedroom, so it’s not as bad as it looked.”

Well, that was good news. All my family photo albums were in the bedroom closet. I felt a little better. I hadn’t had a lot of personal things in my living room and kitchen, just furniture and appliances. My memories were all in the bedroom.

“Thanks for your help,” I said.

“No problem. You need someplace to stay until they repair the damage?”

I hesitated. Staying with Alisha was tempting, but I didn’t want to bring more trouble or danger into her life. “Um, that’s okay. I have a place to stay.”

“Where?”

“Um, yeah. I’m, uh, staying with Blane for now.”

Silence, then, “Are you out of your mind?” she screeched. I winced, pulling the phone slightly away from my ear. “Don’t you remember what he did? The things that piece of shit said to you—”

Alisha had been with me, had comforted me, when Blane had broken our engagement. She’d seen my heartbreak and her animosity toward Blane had reached a new high.

“It’s not what you think,” I broke in to her tirade. “We’re not getting back together. Kandi Miller—remember her?—she was murdered.”

“Oh.” Alisha’s voice betrayed surprise now. “I saw that on the news. That was her? His ex?”

“Yeah.”

“Wow. Geez. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” which was an absurd thing to say—it wasn’t okay, but what do you say? “So, anyway, Kade and I are staying with Blane for a little while, until after the funeral and stuff.”

“Kade and you?” she asked, disbelief edging her voice.

“Yeah.”

“Wow.”

“What?”

“Isn’t that going to be a little… awkward?”

She didn’t know the half of it. The desire to tell my friend what had happened between Kade and me was strong, but I held my tongue. “Yeah, it’s been a little… tense.” Understatement of the century.

“Do you need anything?”

I smiled to myself. Alisha was a good friend, OCD and all. “No, I’m okay. Thanks for asking, though.”

“Well, just let me know,” she said.

“Thanks, I will. Tell Lewis I said hello.”

We disconnected and a few minutes later, I pulled up to Blane’s house. It was late afternoon and I thought Blane would probably be back home. Glancing down I saw that my once-white skirt was now smeared with dirt, the delicate blouse I had on was torn, and my knees were streaked with dried blood.

Lovely.

I headed inside, hoping not to encounter anyone on the way to my bedroom. A shower and change of clothes sounded good. I felt grungy and my hair smelled like smoke, which made it darn inconvenient to run into Blane in the hallway upstairs.

“Hey,” I said, trying to ignore how I looked. “How are you doing?”

Blane didn’t answer, his astonished gaze sweeping me from head to foot. “What the hell happened? I thought you were just going to class?”

I sighed, knowing I had to come clean. “I did. But then we went by my apartment, and someone had rigged a bomb.”

“We?”

“Kade and me.”

Blane glanced behind me. “Where’s Kade? Is he all right?” The anxiety in his voice was good to hear. No matter how mad he was at Kade, blood was blood.

“He’s okay. He got some burns on his back, was going to go to the hospital.”

“And you? Were you injured?” He stepped closer now, his hands running from my shoulders down my arms as he inspected me.

“No. Kade saved me. If he’d been a little slower…” I shrugged, not really wanting to finish that sentence. I felt like a cat whose nine lives were running dangerously low.

Blane turned my hand palm up and I winced, the scrapes on my skin burning.

“Come on,” he said, lightly grasping my arm. “I’ve got some salve for your scrapes.”

I expected him to take me downstairs, instead I found myself being led to his bedroom.

If it wouldn’t have looked completely and utterly childish, I’d have dug my heels into the carpet and refused to follow him. Blane’s bedroom held way too many memories, and I found all of them assailing me with the force of a wrecking ball as I walked in the door.

The room smelled strongly of Blane—his cologne, his aftershave, and just him. My step faltered and Blane glanced quizzically at me. I couldn’t look at him, not with images of him and me writhing naked on his bed streaming through my mind like a highlight reel.

He gave me a gentle push to sit me down on the bed and I immediately sprang back up.

“I can stand.” My voice was a little squeaky.

Blane’s jaw tightened. “I’m not going to attack you,” he said flatly.

“It’s not that,” I protested. “It’s just—” Something I really didn’t want to say. I pressed my lips closed and resumed my seat, perching awkwardly on the very edge of the bed.

Blane looked at me for a moment, but I couldn’t read the look in his eyes, then he disappeared into the bathroom. I heard the water running and a moment later, he returned with a washcloth and a small plastic tube.

He sat beside me, taking one of my hands in his, and began gently cleaning the dirt and dried blood.

“Was your apartment destroyed?” he asked.

I focused on my hand as I answered. “Alisha said the back is okay, that just the front part was burned.”

“I’ll go talk to Gage again,” Blane offered.

“That may not be necessary,” I said. “Kade and I went by.”

The pause in Blane’s ministrations was nearly imperceptible. “I see.”

“You have enough going on right now,” I said, hoping to placate him. I didn’t need him and Kade getting into another pissing match. Time to change the subject. “Have you heard anything about the funeral?”

Blane switched to my other hand, reaching across me and moving closer. “They’re holding her body for evidence right now. I imagine the funeral will be next week sometime.”

“And they’ve cleared you, right?” I was sure the only reason Blane had been on their list was because they always went after the boyfriend, husband, or ex in these things.

Blane took a moment to respond, setting aside the washcloth and squeezing some salve into my palm. He started rubbing it in, the calluses on his fingers a gentle abrasion against my skin.

“No, they haven’t.”

I jerked my gaze to his, but he was looking down at our hands. “What do you mean, ‘they haven’t’?”

“They have an eyewitness who says I was there that night,” he said.

He seemed so calm, in stark contrast to the sheer panic flooding me. I fisted my hand, clutching his fingers, and he finally looked up at me.

“How could anyone think you would do something like that?”

“I’m a defense attorney, Kat,” he said. “I’ve made my share of enemies in this town over the years.”

“But you would never… hurt someone, anyone, like that! You wouldn’t do that to Kandi and you certainly wouldn’t have killed her.” I was horrified, my mind trying to wrap itself around the fact that the police would consider Blane a serious suspect. “What’s going to happen?”

Blane gently pried open my clenched fist and resumed rubbing the salve on my palm. “If my source at the precinct is correct, they’ll work with my lawyer first and then come by here to question me. If I go downtown, it’ll be all over the news. We’ll see if they’ll agree so we can avoid the media circus getting any worse.”

Stunned, I couldn’t think of what to say. This was rapidly turning into a nightmare.

“Could they arrest you?” I asked.

Blane’s eyes met mine and he didn’t answer. He didn’t have to.

I couldn’t wrap my head around it. They suspected Blane strongly enough to question him, possibly arrest him?

“Your hands are like ice,” he murmured, squeezing my hands inside of his.

“I can’t believe this,” I whispered. “It’s… insane.” And I was scared. Scared for Blane.

“Everything will be okay,” he said.

Kade had said that, too, but I didn’t know if I believed either of them.

“Kat, the last time we talked, while you were in Vegas, you were really angry,” Blane said carefully. “And I deserved everything you said. I… underestimated my uncle’s aspirations for me. And the thing is, I believed the lies because I’ve seen you and Kade together. I know my brother better than anyone, and I’ve never seen him fall for a woman. Not like he’s fallen for you.”

I listened, barely breathing.

“So I need to know.” He raised his eyes to meet mine. “Are you and I truly finished? Is what we had gone for good?”

My heart was racing as though I was running a marathon and panic made me break out in a cold sweat. I couldn’t deal with this right now. Kade and I had nearly gotten burned alive. The police were coming to question Blane about Kandi’s murder. And Blane wanted to have a talk about the status of our relationship? It seemed absurd to me.

I jumped to my feet. “Blane, I don’t think now is the right time to talk about this,” I said, pulling my hands from his and backing toward the door.

He stood, moving closer until he towered over me. I swallowed, memories threatening to overwhelm me. Given the path the conversation had suddenly taken, I wondered if Blane bringing me into his bedroom had been intentional, if he knew exactly how much standing inches from where we’d first made love would affect me.

“Give me something, Kat,” he rasped. “Please. Just tell me if you still love me.”

His gray eyes held me captive and I couldn’t look away, their depths filled with pain and sorrow. Another woman might have been glad to see Blane hurting. He’d hurt me, after all. But I couldn’t stand it, so I told him the truth.

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

Relief flashed across his face, then he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close. I held him around his waist and rested my head against his chest, listening to the strong sound of his heart beating.

My emotions were teetering on a ledge, my love for Blane warring with the guilt I was carrying around inside. It was wrong of me to lead him on. But if he knew what had happened between Kade and me, he’d never forgive me. And I couldn’t face that yet. I’d just gotten him back in some small degree and couldn’t handle the thought of another fallout between us—one that, this time, would be permanent.

The guilt gnawed at my heart, which made me hold him even more tightly. His shirt grew damp beneath my cheek and when he forced my chin to tip up, I couldn’t look him in the eye, so stared at a spot on his neck instead.

“Don’t cry, Kat,” he said, his words a pained whisper. “It’ll be okay. I promise.”

But it wouldn’t be okay. It really, really wouldn’t. Not with Kade, who was determined to disappear from my life, and not with Blane, who I loved but couldn’t trust.

My anger and bitterness over what Blane had done had finally dissipated, but without it, I felt even emptier than I had before.

I had to be at work soon, and my uniform was in my burned-out apartment. I called Tish to see if she had an extra I could borrow.

“Oh, not to worry—we have new uniforms for the Fourth,” she informed me.

My heart sank. “Oh no.”

“Oh yes.”

“Are they as bad as the Santa ones?”

“Think Daisy Duke meets Wonder Woman.”

I groaned. Good Lord, I couldn’t even imagine what that was, and it turned out that even if I’d been able to, it wouldn’t have come close to the real thing.

I turned around to see exactly how much of my ass was hanging out of the cut-off denim shorts Romeo had bought for us. They were even shorter than the ones he usually made us wear in the summer. The employees’ bathroom mirror said way too much. The shirt was like Daisy’s, tying between my breasts, but one side was red-and-white striped while the other was navy blue with little white stars. At least the shirt had short sleeves, so I knew it would stay on, but the plunging neckline left little to the imagination. Though the bare midriff and stomach didn’t bother me—my broken-heart diet had taken care of that—my chest appeared immune to weight loss.

I sighed. Well, here was hoping the getup helped with tips.

It was a good hour or more into my shift when I turned from one side of the bar to work the other and saw Kade walking in the door.

He’d changed into jeans and another of his ubiquitous black T-shirts, and he was just taking off his sunglasses when he spotted me. His hand paused for a fraction of a moment, then he was heading my way.

A stupid grin spread across my face and my pulse quickened. Ridiculous, how glad I was to see him, but I couldn’t help it.

“Hey,” I said as he slid onto an empty barstool. “How’s your back?”

“I told you to go to Blane’s,” he said. “Nowhere else.”

His voice was hard and flat, his eyes sparking with anger.

My smile faded. “I did, but I had to come to work.”

“I would have brought you, or Blane.”

“You weren’t there.” And I wasn’t going to relate how I’d snuck by Blane’s den to avoid an uncomfortable car ride. I was getting angry. Here I’d been all happy to see him and he had to go and ruin it. “Stop yelling at me and have a drink.” I popped the top off a beer bottle and set it in front of him.

Kade glowered at me and I raised an eyebrow, waiting. At last he sighed and reached for the beer. Taking a swig, he eyed me.

“Looks like your ribs are better,” he said.

I looked down at the expanse of skin revealed by my “patriotic” uniform. “Yeah, guess so.” The marks were yellowish now, hardly visible in the low light of the bar.

“Better not come home in that outfit,” he said. “Blane will have a shit fit.” The words were said casually, but his eyes were keen.

I stiffened. “It doesn’t matter what Blane thinks,” I said. “He doesn’t control me.” I felt absurdly like a rebellious teenager: He’s not the boss of me.

“Doesn’t he?”

“Is that what you think?”

Kade gave a deceptively casual shrug and took another drink of beer. “I brought you back because he needed you.”

His words stung. “What about what I need?”

Kade’s eyes held mine. “That’s something only you can decide.”

I had to go back to work then, but Kade stayed. He switched to coffee after the beer, and I could feel his eyes on me as I worked. Too vivid memories of his hands on me—of all we’d done in his bed—made me acutely aware of him.

I tried not to think about it.

I was delivering drinks to a table with three guys when one of them put his hand on my ass. I cursed Romeo in my head while hurriedly putting down the drinks.

“No touching,” I said through a forced smile, pushing his hand away.

“Sweetheart, I’ve got a hard-on just lookin’ at you,” the guy said. He wasn’t drunk but was well on his way. His buddies laughed, both of them staring at my chest.

“Well, that’s just great,” I said sweetly. “I hear men your age often have trouble with that.”

His smile faded pretty quick and I headed back behind the bar.

I grabbed the coffeepot and went to refill Kade’s cup.

“Should I break his arm or just his hand?”

I glanced at him, surprised. “Neither,” I said. His face was cold and he was staring at the guy who’d put his hand on me. “It’s just part of the job. Especially when Romeo has us dress like this. You get used to it.”

“I don’t like it,” he said, swinging his gaze back to mine.

I shrugged. “It is what it is,” I said. “You didn’t tell me how your back was. What did the doctor say?”

“He said I’m fine. Don’t change the subject.”

“Fine. Then I’ll just get back to work then.” I spun away and spent the rest of the evening ignoring Kade. Well, at least I pretended to. He was a hard man to ignore, especially when I felt his gaze on me the entire time.

“So what’s with tall, dark, and gorgeous?” Tish asked as we were cleaning up. She gave a small jerk of her head toward Kade. “Wasn’t he the guy you left with that one night a few months back?”

She meant when I’d pretended to pick Kade up from the bar. It felt like forever ago, so much had happened since.

“Remember how Blane and I broke up because he accused me of sleeping with his brother?”

She nodded.

“That’s him.”

Her mouth fell open and she took another look. “Well, if you weren’t sleeping with him, you should fix that right quick.”

I avoided that one, reiterating instead, “He’s Blane’s brother.”

Tish shrugged, tugging the overflowing trash bag from the bin. “So? Stuff like that happens all the time. It’s not like you’re doing a threesome.” She grinned. “Though that sounds awesome.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at her irreverent humor, though I was sure the image that flashed unbidden through my mind had me turning bright red. I glanced at Kade, who was watching us, and quickly looked away.

At last it was time to leave and I went to grab my purse from underneath the bar.

“I’ll walk you to your car,” Kade said, sliding off the stool.

I gave a curt nod, following him out the door.

“I called a company to start cleanup on your apartment,” he said as I locked the door behind us. “They moved your stuff into storage for now.”

“Thank you,” I replied. That was one less thing to worry about, though I wondered how badly my clothes reeked of smoke.

The night air was thick and humid. Sweat broke out immediately on my skin. Fishing an elastic band from my pocket, I pulled my hair up into a high ponytail as I walked beside Kade. Not even a slight breeze stirred.

“Feels like a storm coming,” I said absently, glancing up at the sky. A flash of lightning lit up the horizon.

“Not pissed at me anymore?” Kade asked.

I sighed. “I’m tired of feeling. Angry, sad, hurt, bitter, disappointed, afraid. I’m just sick of it all.” I desperately wanted a drink, something to numb the tumult and confusion inside me.

We’d reached my car and Kade’s Mercedes was right next to it, which was an apt paradigm for how I felt standing next to him. Like his elegant car, he was beautiful and drew the eye. From the wave of his inky black hair to his clear blue eyes, square jaw, lean biceps and shoulders encased in thin cotton, he looked like an expensive luxury. My lips curved in a sardonic smile at the analogy.

Kade leaned against my car, blocking the door. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Just a stray thought.”

He raised an arched brow, waiting.

I sighed, feeling stupid. “I was thinking that our cars look like us.”

Kade frowned in confusion.

“You know,” I said, waving a hand toward the Mercedes, “yours is gorgeous and perfect, and mine is cheap and forgettable.” So forgettable, he didn’t even remember making love to me. Yeah, it was for the best, but it was still a blow to my pride whenever I thought about it, which was way too often.

Now his lips twitched in a near smile even as I wished I’d just kept my mouth shut. The comparison had sounded ridiculous when I’d said it out loud.

He reached out and snagged a finger in the band of my shorts. “C’mere,” he said, tugging lightly. The roughness of his voice made my stomach tighten. I let him pull me closer until we were nearly touching.

“So you think I’m gorgeous and perfect?” he said, settling his hands on my hips.

I deliberately recalled the image of his face as he lost all control, his body inside mine. “You’re beautiful,” I blurted. Kade’s ego didn’t need stroking, but I couldn’t help it.

His smirk faded. “I wish you were as forgettable as your car.”

Kade’s eyes searched mine as though trying to read what I was hiding. My hands were clenched in fists at my sides so I wouldn’t touch him, and I was hypersensitive to every brush of his fingers against my bare skin.

“Come on,” he said, stepping away and taking my hand.

“Where are we going?” I asked, following as he led me to his car.

“There’s something I want to show you.”

“But what about my car?” I protested.

“We’ll get it tomorrow. Get in.”

I thought I should probably say no, should just get in my car and drive away, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to miss a single moment I might have with Kade, not when they were numbered.

I got in the car.

A half hour later, Kade was pulling into a deserted high school parking lot. It was a big school, one everyone in Indiana knew about. He turned off the engine and pocketed the keys.

The sultry night air hit me again when I emerged from the air-conditioned car. You could almost feel the wetness in the air, it was so thick and heavy.

Kade took my hand and we started walking. The night was moonless, the clouds obscuring the night sky, but he seemed to know where he was going, his steps sure.

We left the parking lot and walked across grass toward a gentle hill dotted with trees. A breeze had picked up and I could hear the rustle of the leaves around us. We didn’t speak, and the gradual incline combined with the humidity had me sweating after a few minutes. We eventually broke through a copse of trees and I halted in surprise.

The hill had crested, and spread out below us was the heart of the town, nestled among the trees. Lights blinked in the darkness, warm and friendly. It seemed like something out of one of those Thomas Kinkade paintings.

Kade sat on the grass, drawing me down next to him. The grass was cool and soft on the backs of my thighs. I leaned back on my elbows with a sigh.

“I used to come here when I was a kid,” he said. “It was quiet, peaceful. I could think here, and just… be.”

“It’s beautiful,” I said.

We sat like that, in companionable silence, for a while. I deliberately didn’t think about anything. I just wanted to enjoy being there, in the moment, with Kade.

“I came here when Blane told me he was joining the Navy,” Kade said. He turned on his side to face me, propping himself on one elbow to rest his head in his hand.

It was too dark to see his features clearly, though I tried.

“I was… angry. Scared. Hurt. I felt betrayed,” he said.

My heart went out to the younger version of Kade, one I could see in my mind’s eye, who wasn’t as self-assured as the Kade before me now. That Kade was unsure and just learning to trust his brother.

“Did you tell him?” I asked.

“He knew.”

“What happened?”

“He had about three months before he left for basic, and he spent nearly every waking moment with me. He taught me to shoot and took me to the range to practice. We played basketball, went to the arcade, the batting cages. All kinds of shit.”

Of course Blane had done that. He loved his brother, and as much as he’d wanted to join the Navy, he would have hated leaving Kade.

“I asked him one night, why he was spending so much time with me instead of Kandi,” Kade continued.

“What did he say?”

“He said, ‘Because you mean more to me than anybody else, and you always will.’ ”

The tightness in my chest spread, making my stomach ache.

“Why are you telling me this?” I managed to ask. Regret clawed at me, guilt making me nearly nauseated. Too disheartened to even hold myself up any longer, I lay back on the ground and looked up at the black sky.

“Because it’s not true, not anymore, for either of us. Blane or me.” He moved closer and rested a hand on my stomach, sliding it around until he gripped my waist. I gazed up at him, trying to see his eyes in the darkness.

“You’re part of us now,” he said softly. “And somehow, we all have to find a way to live with it. Even if I thought I could stay away from you, I’d just be lying to myself.” His thumb brushed against my ribs and my skin seemed to tingle at his touch.

I shook my head. “When this is over, I’ll go home. It’s the only way for you and Blane to fix this between you. That’s the way it should be.” I moved to get away from him, but Kade’s grip tightened and he braced himself over me, pushing a denim-clad leg between my thighs to hold me in place.

“Like we’d let you go,” he scoffed. “One of us will have you, that’s for damn sure.”

I shook my head again, more vehemently this time, but my throat was closed off and I couldn’t speak.

His arms were on either side of my head, his weight resting on his palms. I could barely breathe, anxiety and pain combining in my chest to smother me.

Almost of their own volition, my hands crept up to his shoulders. I could feel the heat of his skin through the thin cotton of his shirt. My fingers brushed the nape of his neck. His skin was damp from sweat, just like when we’d made love.

Kade didn’t move, didn’t seem to even blink as my fingers threaded slowly through his hair. My body thrummed as though an electric current was passing between us, from him to me and back.

Lightning flashed, briefly illuminating his face, his expression tortured as he looked at me. I curled my arm around his neck, urging him down. He resisted, his arms locked in position. I licked my lips, unable to tear my gaze from his mouth.

Lightning split the sky again, then the heavens opened up. I gasped in surprise as the first icy drops hit my overheated skin, then let out a high-pitched squeal of dismay as the torrential downpour began.

Kade pulled me to my feet. “Come on, princess,” he said, taking my hand in his. “You won’t melt.”

I could barely see a foot in front of me and latched myself onto Kade’s arm. He led us down the hill, catching me twice when I slipped and would have fallen. When we finally reached the car, we were both drenched to the skin.

“I don’t want to mess up your seat!” I protested when he opened the passenger door for me.

“Feel free to strip naked,” he said, leaning against the car and crossing his arms over his chest as though he was getting ready to watch. The lights illuminating the empty parking lot were a welcome change from the dark.

I laughed at the incongruity of the moment, both of us standing in the pouring rain with me not wanting to get his seat wet. I shoved my dripping hair back from my face. The rain was letting up a bit now, becoming gentle and steady as opposed to a stinging torrent. I tipped my head back and shut my eyes.

After the sweltering heat, this felt good, washing the sticky sweat from my skin. I laughed again in sheer pleasure, stretching my arms up as though to catch the droplets in my hands. God, I couldn’t even remember when I’d last stood outside in a summer rain.

When I opened my eyes, Kade was watching me.

“What?” I asked, self-consciously dropping my arms. I knew I had to look a disaster. My mascara was probably running in rivulets down my face. “I look awful, I know. Damn rain.” I scrubbed at my cheeks and under my eyes, hoping the makeup was gone.

He stepped close to me, catching a finger under my chin and tipping my face up to his.

“I’ll always remember tonight,” he said, “and the way you look right now.”

I gave him a watery half smile. “I look like a drowned rat.”

“You look happy.”

My smile was wider this time, because he looked happy, too, which made his face appear younger and less cold.

“And that outfit was sexy before,” he said, moving us until I was backed against the car. “Soaking wet, it’s downright… indecent.” The last word was a sibilant hiss in my ear. Then he was kissing me, his lips and tongue a slick heat that contrasted sharply against the chill of my skin.

My arms curved around his neck, holding him tight. His hands cupped my rear, pulling me against him. We kissed and kissed, until I lost track of time and space, like we were teenagers forbidden to be together and had to squeeze in as much as we could before we got caught. Or in this case, before either of us came to our senses.

A crack of thunder made me jerk my lips from his in startled fright. I began to shiver.

“Let’s get you home,” he said in a voice so low I barely heard him. This time, I got in when he opened the car door for me.

My teeth chattered and I kicked off my sodden shoes and socks, pulling my knees to my chest so my feet rested on the seat. Kade turned on the heat and soon my chills subsided. I held my icy hands in front of the vent.

“This kills me to do this to your car,” I said. “Water and leather don’t mix.”

“You worry too much,” he said.

“Aren’t you freezing?” I asked. He had to be. Jeans were a bitch when they got wet.

“I’ll admit to some chafing in areas that I prefer to be treated more gently,” he said, making me laugh.

The seat warmer, combined with the heat wafting over me and the stress of the day, had me nodding off. I woke, still groggy, then realized the car had stopped and Kade had turned off the engine.

“Shall I carry you?” Kade teased when I made no move to get out of the car.

“I’m going, I’m going,” I groused. “Maybe I should carry you to ease your ‘chafing.’ ”

He smirked, his blue eyes twinkling at me, the sight making me feel warm from the inside out. “I’d like to see you try.”

I laughed. The idea of me carrying Kade was an absurd one. He had to outweigh me by nearly a hundred pounds.

It had quit raining and the stars were coming out. I carried my shoes in my hand and walked barefoot to the darkened house. Kade fished out his key and was unlocking the door when it was suddenly flung open.

Blane stood there and the look on his face made me immediately take a step back.

“Where the hell have you been?”