A few more memories piggybacked on top of what she’d just rediscovered. As she looked out the passenger window while Tony drove, she considered all of it.
It all felt right.
It didn’t tell her who attacked her, and it didn’t give her back the bulk of her relationship with Rob, but it did make a few things flip into a different perspective that felt right. That had felt desperately missing in a way she hadn’t been able to put her finger on before that moment.
To her, that was every bit as important as regaining all of her memories.
It also left her with a sense of peace she’d known had been missing in her life, but that she had attributed to her fear over the attacker still wandering around out there somewhere.
The overwhelming feeling that something besides her memories was missing.
She’d been missing her Master.
She no longer felt alone.
Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath.
Yes, the fear still hung there, dark and foreboding without memories to light the mass from below.
Now, however, instead of feeling like she walked along the edge of a crumbling cliff, risking a deathly plunge into the abyss, she felt securely tethered to a rock that wouldn’t move.
Tethered heart and soul to Rob.
And to her adopted kinky kin.
Another deep breath filled her lungs with hope every bit as much as it did with air. No, she wasn’t alone now. Her parents were dead, and she had Steve, Carol, and Bill, among others.
But her family, the ones she knew would drop everything to rush to her side, the ones she would do the same for, they were back in her heart, if not completely in her memories yet.
She had enough. She had enough to remember them, the love she had for all of them and the love she knew they had for her, and for Rob.
The trust they had for Rob to take care of her. To love her. To treat her well.
And she knew if they all had that kind of faith in him, so would she.
Shayla wasn’t home yet and wouldn’t be for at least an hour. He walked down to their bedroom and closed himself in to call her, leaving Laura alone in the living room.
She sat on the floor while Bagel and Cream, Tony and Shayla’s cats, crawled all over her, head-butting her chin and rubbing their heads against her hands in their search for attention.
“Doogie’s going to be all over you when you get home.” She’d been sitting with her back to the hallway and Tony’s voice startled her a little.
She looked over her shoulder at him and caught the smile on his face. He’d changed out of his jeans and work shirt into shorts and a T-shirt.
“He’ll get over it. He’s smelled them before…”
There was that head cock again as Tony watched her. Finally, when she didn’t speak, he asked, “Another memory?”
“Sort of.” She gave the cats one last scratch each before gently moving them from her lap so she could stand. “Some things aren’t really memories, but when I say them it just feels right. Does that make sense?”
“I’m not a psychiatrist.”
She thought about the appointment she’d been putting off making with Dr. Simpson. “I need to make another appointment with my shrink.”
He nodded. “That would be the prudent thing to do.”
She blurted it out. “What if I don’t like who I was…before?”
He cocked his head the other direction. “I doubt that’s going to be a problem. We all love you. Think of it this way. If you do find out stuff about yourself that you’re not happy with, this is the perfect opportunity to make changes that will make you happy.”
“Will Rob love the new me?”
He’d started walking toward the kitchen but stopped in his tracks and turned to face her. “Sweetie,” he gently said, “Rob already loves you. I don’t think there’s much you could do to make him stop loving you.”
Laura felt more familiarity coming back as she helped Tony get dinner ready. To the point she was about to playfully run him out of the kitchen to get him out of her way when he recognized what was going on.
“You think you’ve got this under control?” he teased.
“Yeah, I think I can make baked ziti without help.”
He grinned and took his glass of iced tea to one of the barstools pushed under the counter, where he took a seat to watch her. “Then go for it, missy.”
She giggled, another memory falling into place. It had been his nickname for her once she wore his collar of protection. And still was. “Yes, Sir,” she teased right back.
That got a full-throated laugh out of him. He held his glass up in a mock toast. “Now that was a great thing to hear come out of your mouth. I was wondering if we ever would.”
They talked while she cooked. The few times she fumbled and paused, unable to remember where something was, he waited until she asked for prompting instead of jumping in to save her.
It didn’t escape her notice that she was more familiar with their kitchen than she’d been with the one at her condo, at first.
“I spend a lot of time here with Shay, didn’t I?”
“You do. It’s been weird not having everybody together like we’re used to.”
She stopped, hands braced on the counter. “I’m sorry,” she quietly said before another storm of tears surprised her.
He rounded the counter to hug her. “I didn’t mean it like that. We just—”
“Didn’t want to overwhelm me.”
“Yeah.” He made her look up at him. “Rob asked us to keep the BDSM stuff from you. And of course we did it. Because we were all willing to do whatever it took to help him and you.”
“I hope this gets easier.”
“I wish I had an answer for you there.”
“Can we go to the club this weekend?”
He pursed his lips. She realized she recognized the expression but wasn’t sure what it meant. Finally, he said, “That’s up to Rob. I’m thinking no. It’s too soon.”
“But what if it helps me get my memory back?”
“But what if it doesn’t, and overwhelms you?” He rested his hands on her shoulders. “Look, I’ll talk to everyone. Maybe we can have a private party here Saturday night. I’m sure Shayla will be up for it. That way, it’s a small, controlled environment, and you and Rob can have privacy as you need it.”
She nodded.
Shayla rushed in from work and practically knocked Laura over as she threw her arms around her. “Are you okay?”
“I’m okay. Sorry I borrowed Tony.”
“Hey, it’s all right.” Shayla frowned. “Did anything else come back?”
“I think enough did. For now.” She took a deep breath. “For starters. It has to be enough.”
Shayla went to put her things away and change clothes. As her friend reappeared in a tank top and shorts, with a leather collar locked around her neck, Laura once again reached up to her own throat.
She felt naked despite her clothes.
The irony did not escape her.
Tony watched her. “You all right?”
She slowly shook her head. “No.” She felt tears welling up in her eyes again and silently cursed her inability not to cry. “He took my day collar. That fucker stole it.” She walked over to where they kept a roll of paper towels hanging under the upper cabinets and ripped off a couple of sheets. Angrily, she blew her nose.
Tony rounded the counter, but didn’t touch her. “Do you remember him?”
She froze as she realized why he’d asked it, but another wave of frustration washed through her. “No.” She blew her nose again. “I can’t remember a face. Just that it was a guy.” She thought about it some more. “Shorter than Rob but taller than me.”
They watched her, not interrupting.
She closed her eyes and the memory of opening her front door and having it shoved open, surprising her, came to mind. But the person in the doorway still remained a large, human-shaped shadow.
“That’s all,” she finally said. “I did open the door for him. He caught me by surprise when I did, but I don’t remember him.”
Rob forced himself not to speed. Once Tony had convinced him Laura was safe and with them, and that they wouldn’t let her out of their sight until he got there, he calmed down.
Tony’s latest text indicated she’d remembered a few more things but didn’t elaborate.
Recriminations swam through his mind. I should have told her. I should have been up front with her.
Would she now hate him for holding so much back, regardless of his reasoning?
He felt the bulk of her play collar in his pocket, rubbing against his leg. Had he totally botched their future together? Should he have severed ties with all their kinky friends until she’d decided if she even wanted him?
He would have hated doing that, but he’d do anything for her.
It was nearly seven when he pulled into their driveway behind Laura’s truck and parked. He didn’t bother knocking when he got there, going straight inside.
The three of them were standing in the kitchen talking. As soon as Laura saw him, he started to say something but she flew into his arms, crying, clinging to him.
Tony walked over and grabbed his upper arm. “Come on.”
He was shocked when Tony led them through the laundry room into the playroom that sat just off the garage.
Shayla trailed behind, not saying anything, but carrying a box of tissues in her hand.
“Rob, I want you to stand right about…here,” Tony said, positioning him.
Tony took Shayla’s hand and made her release Rob. “You, kneel here.”
Rob’s heart pounded in his chest as he watched.
Laura knelt in front of Tony.
“Laura, look at me.”
She looked up at Tony.
“Tell him what you remembered.”
Shayla ducked in to hand her a tissue before darting back to Tony’s side.
Laura wiped at her cheeks as she looked up at Rob. “I remember that night.”
“The attack?”
She shook her head. “No.”
Suddenly, he couldn’t suck in a breath. He didn’t dare risk interrupting. His gut tightened and his knees felt like they’d let go any second.
“Tell him, Laura,” Tony said.
Rob realized he was using his “Dom voice.” The tone he used in a scene.
Tony hadn’t used that tone with Laura since…
He swallowed hard.
Tears rolled down her cheeks. “The bastard stole my day collar. The one you gave me that night. When you asked me to be your submissive.”
He started to reach for her but Tony held out a restraining arm. “Wait,” he softly said. “Let her say it. It might help.”
“Tony took his play collar off me that night and you gave me my day collar.” She wiped at her eyes again. “Ever since I first saw Shay in the hospital, it felt like something was missing. You said it was a necklace, but it felt like more. Now I know why.”
Rob nodded but didn’t speak. He felt the collar through his pants and slid his hand into his pocket to wrap his fingers around it.
“I trust you,” she said to Rob. “I trust you, and I want it back. I want your collar. I need it. I want at least that feeling of safety back because I don’t want that bastard to steal that from me, too. I want to be your submissive.”
Her expression froze for a second, her body rigid. “I…” Her eyes closed.
Every muscle in his body tensed.
“I was going to ask you…” She faltered over the words as she struggled with the memory. “I wanted you to make me your slave,” she finally whispered before looking up at him again.
He nodded.
“Is that what you want, Laura?” Tony asked. “You need to tell him.”
Laura stared up at Rob. “I’ve never wanted anything more in my life,” she said.
Tony dropped his arm. “Rob?”
Rob pulled something out of his pocket and held it up for her to see.
A blinding flash of memories swept through her, of all the times he’d buckled that same play collar around her neck, at home or before going to the club, or at a private party here or at Seth’s or at Tilly’s or anywhere with their friends.
Their family.
Rob’s voice sounded choked. “Will you please do me the honor of being my slave?”
She nodded. “Yes, Sir.”
He knelt in front of her, his eyes never leaving hers as he buckled the collar around her neck. Then the corner of his mouth quirked in a smile. “I should beat your ass for getting your hair cut.”
She laughed and fell into his arms, crying happy tears this time. “I’m sorry, Sir. I plead amnesia.”
It felt so good, his arms around her, holding her, his hands stroking her back.
Her Master.
“It’s all right, sweetheart,” he said. “I forgive you. I’ll always forgive you.”
She wasn’t sure exactly when Tony and Shay stepped out to give them privacy, but Shay had left the box of tissues on one of the spanking benches. Rob stood and helped her to her feet. “You’re still my beautiful baby girl. If you want it short, you can have it short. It’s your hair.”
She rested her head against his chest. “No, Sir. I don’t want it short.” She’d forgotten how good it felt when he grabbed a handful of hair in his fist and led her around by it. “Why haven’t you called me that before?”
“Called you what?”
“Baby girl.”
“I did, in the hospital, when you first woke up. When you sort of reacted badly, I thought I shouldn’t.”
Thinking back, she remembered she had. “I’m sorry.”
He kissed her forehead. “Stop apologizing.”
Now there was something she wanted to do to round off the recovered memories. No, not everything was there with her relationship with him, but one thing was.
She looked up at him before pushing him back against one of the spanking benches. She grinned as she sank to her knees again and worked on his belt.
He grinned, too, and didn’t bother stopping her. His cock instantly grew hard, making it difficult to work the zipper down, but she finally had him freed from his briefs.
Slowly, she wrapped her fingers around his shaft. Their gazes locked as she flicked her tongue out and licked at the head. The past and present merged as she remembered what she’d said to him that night.
“I’ve been dying to do this to you, Sir.” She slowly engulfed his cock in her mouth, licking, teasing, tasting, her gaze not leaving his.
He reached down and stroked her cheek. “Such a good girl,” he cooed.
It only served to fire her need. She sucked him deep into her mouth, her other hand cupping his sac and gently rolling it against her palm as she worked his cock. She wanted to make him come, wanted to drain his balls.
Wanted to taste him.
It didn’t take long before his shaft tightened and his entire body tensed. “Get ready,” he warned just before she felt his balls draw up tight and fill her mouth with his cum.
She closed her eyes, moaning as she swallowed, enjoying this, savoring it, wishing the moment would never end.
Then he laughed.
“What?” She looked up at him.
“At least Tony didn’t interrupt us this time.”
Rob wasn’t done, however. He wasn’t about to waste a moment’s time. He ordered her to strip and bent her over the same spanking bench, where he placed his left hand on the back of her neck to pin her down before spanking her with his bare hand.
When he began lightly slapping her pussy, she closed her eyes and moaned, arching her back to get more contact.
“Such a good girl,” he said. “Don’t move.” He left her side. She heard him rummaging around for a moment before he returned. Then the sound of plastic rustling.
She glanced back and saw he was hard again and had rolled a condom onto his cock.
She looked up at him. “Sir, we don’t use condoms.”
“Are you on the pill again?”
She started to answer, then her mouth snapped shut. No, she’d seen the packages in her medicine cabinet, but hadn’t thought about them. “Sorry, Sir.”
He laughed and slapped her ass, a little bit of sting but making her pussy clench again with need. “No apologies tonight.”
He stood behind her and she held still, moaning as he slid his cock deep inside her.
This was something they hadn’t done that first night, but it was something they’d done plenty of other times, right here on this bench.
And damn, did it feel good.
He filled her, big enough to make her pleasantly ache in the good way as his cock stretched her cunt.
Once he was buried deep inside her, he fell still and she felt him reach for something.
She barely had time to process the sound of the click before a low hum filled the room and he pressed the vibrator against her clit.
The moan that rolled out of her as her orgasm exploded came from a totally primitive place inside her. Her fingers locked around the bench’s uprights as she fucked herself back onto his cock. He refused to let up, making her take it, forcing several orgasms out of her.
“You can do it, baby girl,” he urged, amusement tingeing his voice. “You’ve taken this and more. You’re just a little out of practice is all.”
He was right about that. It wasn’t uncommon for him to tie her up and force her to come for a solid hour or more before finally giving in to her begging and fucking her.
He took a couple of hard strokes inside her, triggering another round of orgasms that threatened to take her breath away.
“That’s it. Such a good girl. Fuck my cock, baby.”
She did, knowing she had no choice but to obey him and let him do what he wanted to her body.
She wouldn’t have it any other way.
She didn’t know how long he kept her there, forcing her to come with his cock buried inside her, but she collapsed onto the bench when he turned the vibrator off, set it aside, and grabbed her by the hips.
“I’ll take it easy on you tonight.” He fucked her, hard and fast, and again she had to hold on to the bench, this time to keep from falling off as the sound of his thighs slapping against her ass filled the room.
One more sweet shudder rolled through her as her pussy clamped down on him again.
“Oh, good girl,” he managed, breathless. Then he plunged hard and deep one final time, a groan escaping him as he fell still inside her. He braced himself against the bench, the front of his shirt rubbing along her naked back as he nibbled the nape of her neck.
The feeling of his breath against her flesh felt so good, so right, she wanted to cry.
This is what she’d been missing above all.
Him.
After he caught his breath he got up and stepped into the powder room to clean up before returning to her and gathering her into his arms. “I could not have made it through dinner if I didn’t do that to you first,” he said with a playful smile.
She rested her forehead against him. “Yes, Sir. Me, either.”
Tony looked amused when they emerged from the playroom a few minutes later. Rob had helped Laura clean up and get dressed, but he made her wear her play collar.
Shay rushed into the kitchen. “Well?”
“Pet,” Tony called in a warning tone from the living room, where he sat on the couch watching TV.
Laura threw her arms around her friend. “It’s all good,” she assured her.
After dinner, Rob followed her back to the condo. While she waited at a stop light, she looked down at her hands.
The solitaire glittered in the dim light. She held out her hands, palms down, and stared at them. The pale circle of flesh she’d had when first waking up in the hospital had blended into the rest of her finger on her left hand. She thought about it for several minutes and switched the ring from her right to her left.
That felt better.
Much better.