Surviving Chaos

8

“James,” said Sadie.

“What is it, Sadie?”

He could hear the worry in her voice, the sorrow, and the depression that had been creeping over her like some slow-growing but intense fungus.

“Never mind, I don’t know.”

James glanced up from the squirrel. Sadie was lying flat on her back on the ground. Normally she was concerned about getting herself overly dirty. Especially her hair. But that had all gone completely out the window. There were leaves stuck in her hair and on her pants.

“Come on, Sadie, get up and help me with this.”

“I don’t now how to do anything. I’m no help. I’m useless.”

“That’s not going to get us anywhere. There’s no point in feeling sorry for ourselves.”

“I’m not feeling sorry for myself. I’m telling the truth.”

“Listen,” said James. “You’ve got to cut this out, seriously. We’re both worried about Mom. But words aren’t going to help her.”

“And what is?”

“This soup.”

“It’s not a soup. It’s a dead squirrel in some water.”

James sighed. “Why don’t you do something useful and get me that book on edible plants. The one Max was reading.”

“There’s nothing to eat around here.”

“Get it.”

Sadie sighed and got up as slowly as possible. James could hear her rummaging around in the packs until she found the book.

She came back and tossed it into the dirt at James’s feet.

“There you go,” she said. There was anger in her voice.

“You know what Max says, Sadie, that we’ve got to keep going. We’ve got to keep pushing on.”

“Max says, Max says,” mocked Sadie. “And where’s Max now? Probably dead.”

“Don’t say that.”

“Why not? It’s the truth. We’re all just sitting around here like Max is going to come back and save us. But do you really think that?”

“I think he’s going to come back.”

“And what if he doesn’t?”

James was silent for a moment. The reality was that he didn’t want to consider that option. But what would Max have said? “If he doesn’t, we’ll find a way.”

“A way to what? What are we going to do? We’re going to have to leave here. We can’t survive here. No matter how many squirrels we kill or how many berries we find, it’s not going to be enough.”

“So we’ll find somewhere else.”

“How? It’s not like Mom can move. And we can’t push her in that hunk of metal, that stupid Bronco that doesn’t have any gas.”

“Just shut up, Sadie. Seriously, just shut up. You’re not helping.”

Sadie fell silent. She lay back down on the ground, closing her eyes.

The whole thing was starting to sound just like the arguments they’d had before the EMP. They’d gone a while being very civil to each other. Sadie had been trying to do her part, helping, learning how to fire a gun, doing the chores that she’d needed to do.

But that was when things seemed to have been going their way. That was when Chad had been alive, when they’d been at the farmhouse.

Things only seemed to be getting worse. Nothing good had happened to them since they’d left the farmhouse.

James still remembered Chad rushing that man back in the compound. He remembered Chad’s dead, lifeless face. He remembered the way Chad had glanced back at James. There’d been a pleading look in his eyes, a look that James would never be able to forget. Chad had screwed up big time, and he’d known it. But his last act had been to help save James’s life. His last act had been something good.

James would never forget that.

The water was boiling. The squirrel sat there in the thin metal pot, looking unappetizing even with his rumbling stomach.

Mandy appeared at his side. “Good work, James.”

“How’s my mom doing?”

“She’s good,” said Mandy. But there was a note to her voice that made James think she wasn’t telling the whole truth.

“She’s worried about us, isn’t she?”

Mandy nodded. “I think so.”

James didn’t know what to say. The situation was just so intense. He’d never dealt with anything like this before. And he’d never thought he’d have to.

His life before the EMP hadn’t exactly been easy. Compared to the other kids in his class, that was. His mom, unlike the other parents he knew, didn’t have the money to buy fancy things for him and Sadie. It wasn’t like they’d been broke or anything. But money just didn’t flow freely like it did for his friends. They’d had a discussion about James buckling down and studying hard, for instance, rather than taking the SAT prep course that was strongly recommended by the school and all the guidance counselors.

There’d been moments where James had gotten in trouble. A couple fights here and there, sprinkled throughout his years at school. Once a kid had insulted him, saying that he didn’t even have a dad.

That was true. And that was why it’d gotten to James so much. He’d given the kid a good beating, and gotten in a hell of a lot of trouble for it. Georgia, though, when she’d picked him up for his out of school suspension, had told him he’d done the right thing. She was old school like that.

But that life he’d had… those “hardships” seemed like nothing now.

Now he was worrying that his mom might die from a gunshot wound to the back. He was worried that he and his sister might starve to death. Or suffer some worse fate should someone come across them in the woods.

“You still with us, James?”

“Huh? Yeah, just thinking.”

“Don’t do too much of that. There’s no point in worrying. Here, I’ll watch this little soup of ours, and you and Sadie can go look for some berries. I see you got the book out.”

“I think Sadie’s right, there aren’t any berries.”

“Maybe not. But it doesn’t hurt to look.”

“We’re just going to use up all our energy looking for those stupid berries,” said Sadie, her voice high and whiny. I’ve already read that stupid book. Do you know how many calories are in a berry? Not enough to go looking for them, that’s how many.”

Mandy kept her voice calm and level. “There are other things to eat besides berries. Why don’t you have another look at the book, James?”

“I’ve got to finish this soup.”

“I’ll take over,” said Mandy. “Why don’t you take a look at the mushroom section?”

James took the book, and Mandy took his spot by the fire.

“Sadie, you get up and help me with this. I think it needs a little more water.”

“It’s practically all water already.”

“Just do it, or else you’re not helping anyone lying there.”

Sadie, to James’s surprise, obeyed. She got up and sullenly went over to help Mandy, peering into the soup to see if it really needed more water.

Sadie looked up to Mandy, and maybe Mandy was the only one who could pull her out of this emotional pit she’d sunk into.

“I’ll go look for some mushrooms, then,” said James, as Sadie went to get some more water.

Mandy nodded at him. “I don’t need to tell you to take your gun.”

“No,” said James. “No, you don’t.”

The guns, though, were a problem. It’d been easier when they’d had all the rifles they could need, and all the ammo to go along with them.

But the ammo had all been stolen. They were down to two handguns, and not much ammo. The rule was that one gun had to be at camp at all times, and if someone was out on their own, they needed the other gun.

James walked off, leaving Mandy and Sadie behind. He got to a place where he couldn’t hear their voices. He sat down, his back against a tree, and breathed a sigh of relief. The stress was getting to him. Part of that stress was just being at the camp. Sadie wasn’t helping, but it would be stressful even if she’d been more cooperative.

James opened the small book on edible plants. He found the mushroom section, and started reading, making sure to move his eyes around his surroundings once in a while. It wouldn’t be good to get lost in a book, not when at any moment the unexpected could happen.

According to the book, there might be some edible mushrooms around, given the time of year and location. But the only problem was that they looked very similar to the infamous death cap mushroom, a pale white mushroom that almost always caused death, unless the proper antidote was given.

They had no antidotes with them.

Would it be worth it, as an amateur mushroom hunter, to try to add a few more calories to their diet, at the risk of death?

James didn’t know. But his stomach was telling him that it was certainly worth it.