The Faeman Quest

Thirty-Five

‘What’s the matter with him?’ Brimstone asked curiously. Even George was staring.

‘Meep, meep!’ Henry said. His legs were pumping furiously, but since he was lying on his side they weren’t carrying him very far, although the motion did encourage him to move in a slow circle. There were strange pink lights in his eyes that spun in random spirals.

‘Looks like a Border Redcap got him,’ Chalkhill muttered. He was knelt beside the still body of Queen Holly Blue, his hands unusually gentle as he checked her pulse spots. He glanced back at Brimstone, caught his blank expression and added, ‘They’re a sentient fungus – you only ever find them in the Broads. Their spores induce hallucinations.’

‘Have at you, Coyote!’ Henry shouted suddenly.

‘What do you think he’s hallucinating?’ Brimstone stepped back quickly as one of Henry’s flailing feet came close to his leg.

‘Something from his childhood,’ Chalkhill ventured. ‘It’s often something like that. Something he saw or read in a book. He’s a human so it’s bound to be bizarre. Listen, Silas, I need your help.’

‘He looks as if he’s running,’ Brimstone said. ‘If he wasn’t lying down, he’d be halfway to Yammeth Cretch by now.’

‘ Whoosh! ’ Henry said.

There was an answering rumble from somewhere high above them. Brimstone looked up. Although his eyes weren’t what they used to be, even with his enhanced senses, he could make out distant shapes that might well have been personal flyers. He wondered vaguely if Chalkhill’s souped-up ouklo could outrun them.

‘Silas,’ Chalkhill snapped, more sharply this time, ‘get over here and help me put her in the recovery position.’

‘Recovery from what – she’s dead, isn’t she?’

‘ Meep, meep, eeee-yah!’ Henry murmured, waving both arms about in the manner of someone falling off a cliff. ‘ Thud! ’ he said and lay still. Then he looked up wide-eyed, grimaced and jerked as if an anvil had fallen on his head. But his movements were growing less violent and there was a dopey expression on his face as if he was sliding into sleep.

Chalkhill nodded thoughtfully. ‘Stung by the weed, I’m afraid. That’s what prickleweed does for you.’

Brimstone wondered whether he should alert Chalkhill to the approaching flyers, but curiosity got the better of him. ‘Doesn’t that mean she’s dead?’ he asked. ‘She looks dead to me.’

‘She’s dead, all right. But help me get her into the recovery position anyway. We need to be able to tell Hairstreak we did everything possible before admitting she snuffed it.’

‘I think it might be better if you got her into the ouklo,’ Brimstone said. ‘We’re about to have company.’

Chalkhill followed his gaze. ‘You stupid old tort, why didn’t you tell me?’ He stood up as the first flyer circled for a landing. ‘OK, don’t panic. Nobody knows we kidnapped them and they’re in no position to snitch about it. The story is we were flying to the city when we spotted them down below and landed to see if we could help.’

Brimstone smiled at him benignly. ‘Oh, I’m not panicking, Jasper. It’s not in my nature.’ Besides, George could handle any trouble that might arise.

The flyer set down a short distance from their ouklo and an attractive young woman climbed out. ‘Thank Gods you’re here!’ exclaimed Chalkhill loudly. ‘We have no idea how these unfortunate people come to be in such dire straits, but they seem to have suffered some sort of an accident through no fault of ours and we landed in the hope that we might be of some assistance and now it appears they might be the very persons of Her Imperial Majesty our gracious Queen Blue and her honoured Consort Henry and – good grief, it’s you!’

With his heightened perception, Brimstone had spotted Madame Cardui at once, even though the old bat had obviously undergone a head peel. He smothered a snigger. This was going to be interesting. Chalkhill was terrified of Cardui, and with good reason. He’d once betrayed her while he was working as a double agent. Now he’d kidnapped the Queen. So their enmity was both political and personal.

Cardui ignored Chalkhill and signalled to three further flyers circling overhead. Within moments, the entire rocky apron was swarming with Imperial troops, while Chalkhill continued to babble. ‘Saw them from the air… our duty as citizens… no idea it was our majestic Queen and King… everything we could do to help… afraid the Queen… actions probably saved his life…’

‘Don’t suppose there might be a reward?’ called Brimstone as the motionless body of the Queen and the far-from-motionless body of her raving – meep, meep – Consort were loaded on to Cardui’s flyer. ‘Few goldies for two loyal citizens who took time out to help the royals in distress?

Madame Cardui gave him a withering look. ‘I must obviously get Their Majesties to a healer as quickly as possible,’ she said quietly, ‘but I shall investigate this incident thoroughly and should it come to light that either of you had anything, anything whatsoever, to do with their condition, I shall hunt you down and I shall catch you and I shall punish you. Personally. Severely. Do we understand one another?’

‘Madame Cardui,’ spluttered Chalkhill, ‘I can assure you we had absolutely nothing, nothing whatsoever, to do with -’

But she was already climbing into the flyer. She ignored Chalkhill, signalled to her escort troops and all four craft took off in good order. Chalkhill glared at Brimstone. ‘Another fine mess you’ve got me into,’ he said.