The Hunt for Excalibur

12 New Acquisition

Purdue was cheerful to a fault. The dining room of his mansion, Wrichtishousis, had incurred severe structural and esthetic damage since it was gutted by a fire a few weeks before. The staff of the house was just as happy to see the repairs and renovations finally being completed, since the grand old room with its high ceiling and bar area was one of much life. This was where Purdue usually received his friends as guests, using the adjacent area of the same room to watch football and play billiards.

“Oh my God, Nina is going to be so jealous,” he grinned as he stood watching the final touches being added to the room before the furniture was due for delivery.

“Why is that, sir?” asked Lillian, the motherly housekeeper. Purdue adored her, even with her tendency to be nosy and a little intrusive at times.

“Lillian,” the butler, Charles, urged from his post at the lobby table, but she paid him no mind.

“It’s alright, Charles,” Purdue chuckled. It was the perpetual exchanged between the butler and the housekeeper in his home — the curious and harmless older lady overstepping her boundaries while the painfully rigid butler would reprimand her at every turn.

Purdue put his arm around her shoulder and led her to the unkempt part of the lobby where the evacuated pieces of furniture waited to be relocated and arranged by Charles and his staff. “I bought a new table for the dining room,” Purdue told his housekeeper. It was not big news, Lillian thought, but she was happy for her boss nonetheless.

“That is wonderful, sir. It is such a pity the previous dining table was destroyed,” she sympathized. Lillian remembered why the dining room was destroyed. Another in a line of bad choices in women that her playboy employer was all too known for, happened. A shoot-out that almost killed Purdue followed the malicious woman’s wrath, and it all ended up in a destructive fire that broke out from the hearth. “Glad you found a new piece worthy of replacing it, sir.”

“No, no, you are missing the point, my dear,” Purdue smiled. He reminded Charles of a naughty child waiting for a well-planned prank to unfold. “You see, Lily, the table I bought to replace the old one is from an era of romance and chivalry. Good old 12^th Century Britain and its legends has yielded a stunning piece of work, built by a carpenter from the Isle of Arran.”

“Ooh!” she enthused, clasping her hands together. “And how old is it, then?”

His staff knew how obsessed Purdue was with history, which was the primary reason for his constant expeditions far and wide to unearth relics of legend.

“Edward McFadden, the carpenter who built and carved this immaculate piece, lived in Arran in the 14^th Century,” Purdue informed her. Charles gave the revelation a nod of acknowledgement as he polished the brass dragon bowl Purdue received as a gift from a Mongolian business partner.

“My, that is old,” Lillian conceded. “And this is why Dr. Gould will envy you?”

“I certainly hope so,” he said. “It was inspired by the Round Table of lore.”

“King Arthur’s Round Table, sir?” Charles finally asked.

“Correct!” Purdue boasted. “For many years, historians thought that it was in fact the Round Table that French poet Maistre Wace wrote of in 1155. Of course, it was disputed, what with Arthur being a fictional character, but still, an antique treasure in its own right.”

“Lovely!” Lillian smiled. “And when will it be arriving?”

Purdue looked at his watch. “Should have been here already, actually. Charles, will you arrange for the other furniture to be carried in so long, please. I shall give Ava a call and find out what is keeping them.”

“Yes, sir,” Charles answered, and proceeded to round up his people.

Purdue got no answer from Ava’s cell phone on the first few tries, but finally she picked up, sounding a bit rushed. “David, I’m sorry. We will be there momentarily, I promise. Had some trouble loading the goods due to a last minute shuffle in movers.”

“What is your ETA then?” he asked. “Will you be coming with?”

“Of course,” she said. “I oversee all of our deliveries personally.”

“Now that is good service,” Purdue flirted, looking forward to the beautiful woman’s presence. It had been days since the auction where he purchased all the items her company had up for sale, so he was anxious to meet her again.

“See you in fifteen!” she sang.

As soon as Purdue hanged up the call, his phone rang. Caller ID revealed the caller. “Wow, two pretty ladies in the stretch of a minute,” he remarked to himself. “Hello Nina! I was just talking about you.”

“Dare I ask?” she jested.

“Rather not. To what do I owe this honor?” he inquired.

“I was invited by a Glasgow school to participate in their history week, right?” she started.

“Mazel tov,” he replied.

“Listen! Let me finish,” she snapped a little. “I cannot talk for long. At show and tell, a boy brought in a scabbard that looked old. I mean old as fuck. You know, authentically antique.”

“Okay?” he said, nodding as she spoke.

Nina paused and then whispered, “I saw something incredible happen today. While wearing this scabbard, the boy was struck by lightning, Purdue.”

“Oh my God!” Purdue reacted. “Is he alive?”

“That is the thing,” she said seriously. “He walked away from it as if he took a piss. Like… nothing. Nothing. He practically came off it completely unscathed!”

“Unbelievable!” Purdue agreed.

“I am sending you pictures of the scabbard. Please have a look and tell me what you think. You dabble in ancient artifacts, so I figured you would be able to help me find out more about this thing. The boy says his grandfather has never had it appraised, so I have no idea what the deal is with this scabbard, but I know that it had something to do with that child not getting fried today.”

“Maybe it conducted the current away from him,” Purdue speculated.

“Purdue, he was standing in the rain in a puddle of water! I don’t care what kind of conduction that sheath had, there was no way he would not have been killed, or at least seriously injured.”

The artifact was not normally something Purdue would be interested in, but the way in which Nina related the fascinating science anomaly behind the incident hooked him. “That is absolutely intriguing, Nina. I am just taking care of some business and then I will have a look at your pictures. Can I let you know tomorrow?”

“Aye, thanks Purdue,” she said, sounding relieved over the veins of worry underneath. “As soon as you can, please. My stint in Glasgow runs out tomorrow evening, and then I will be back in Oban.”

“Oh, about that,” he quickly interjected. “Before you go back home, would you mind coming over to Wrichtishousis for a few drinks?”

Nina took a moment. “Um, sure, of course.”

“Then we can discuss your scabbard in more detail, perhaps,” Purdue applied the chum. In the background, Charles unintentionally eavesdropped. Shaking his head, he cracked a rare smile at his employer’s juvenile thrill.