The Perfect Husband

CHAPTER 3

All my friends were at the bar celebrating. Both of them. And their friends. I’m used to being stared at, so it took me a long minute to realize that everyone was staring at my girl. I didn’t know whether to be mad or flattered. She didn’t seem to notice, though. My girlfriend pulled me by the hand and I could tell the moment she identified Peaches. They sized each other up for a moment while I picked Peaches up in my famous bear hug.

“Don’t break her, buddy,” her boyfriend said, slapping me on the back. “Not when she’s buying.”

“I wish I could pass tests. Did it have numbers in it?” I asked Peaches.

“I can practice law now. My father will finally have to pay me what I’m worth. And who is this?”

My girl sure had a set of balls on her, stepping up and standing tall. It really turned me on. “I’m his new girlfriend.”

I liked how she said it so forcefully. Not ashamed or embarrassed or anything.

“My last girlfriend, actually.” I thought I’d clear that up.

“I’d like to hear all about that,” Peaches finally said after they stared at each other for an uncomfortable amount of time.

So the three of us got a booth and the two of them sorted things out.

“I met him tonight and I want him forever,” my girlfriend started out.

“I’ve known him all my life. Before his car accident, he rescued me when I fell in a river. I owe him my life, so I’ve helped him growing up.”

“Why do you fuck him when you have a boyfriend?”

“You know why I fuck him even though I have a boyfriend. In fact, he become my boyfriend knowing that I could not give up such a massive cock.”

“Your boyfriend must love you very much to let you fuck other men.”

“Only this one. I’m monogamous, plus one. Oh, and I have to compensate my boyfriend by sucking him off for every time I fuck your guy. Guys: they’ll do anything to be swallowed.”

“You got a problem with me being his girlfriend?” my Mexican asked.

“Not unless you screw him over. I’ve always felt protective of him.”

“Were you ever his girlfriend?”

“He’s too high maintenance for me,” Peaches answered. “I just don’t have the time, what with going to college full time and working for my cheap father full time. He’s a great guy, but he will always be a handful.”

“So we’re good?”

Now they stared at each other again. If a guy stared at me like that, I’d probably belt him. “If you two are going to kiss, then give me time to get my camera.”

Neither even glanced at me.

“Look, I don’t want to fuck up your shit. You clearly have strong feelings for him, and he deserves someone special. But you may not appreciate how much legal trouble he gets into,” Peaches pointed out. “He doesn’t try to break the law, but he has an incident report longer than his dick. He will always need a lawyer. And lawyers are expensive.”

“So what do you propose?” my girl asked.

“I help him and he helps me. Look, I love my boyfriend. He’s great. But no man outside of porn can touch me where your guy touches me. He’s stretched me so much I can barely feel a normal size penis. Doctors should use him for pregnant women so babies just fall out. I’ll work for free if you let him give me what I’ve become so used to. If you want, I’ll share my guy with you. You’re so drop dead gorgeous, I’m kind of tempted myself, and I’ve never batted for that team before.”

“I’m only interested in one man,” she said with a finality that tickled my wiener. “Although you’re pretty fucking cute, I have to admit. Why does your boyfriend let you fuck another man?”

“He’s poor and I’m helping him through medical school.”

“He’ll leave you when he no longer needs your financial help,” my girl pointed out.

“That’s crossed my mind, but at least I’ll have several more years with him. I don’t want kids or marriage yet anyway, so I can focus on my career. Lawyers work crazy hours.”

I had no idea where they stood, so I just drank as much free beer as I could.

“Tell me about these legal problems that you’ve helped him with.”

Ah, geez! I excused myself and bent over the bar with my buddy so I didn’t have to listen to the girls talk about me in front of my back.

“Your girlfriend is smoking,” he told me.

I looked over, but I didn’t see a cigarette. “I want to keep her. Will you help me?”

He seemed relieved that maybe I wouldn’t be fucking his girlfriend no more. “Hell yes, I’ll help you. Tomorrow let’s go shopping so you can surprise her every day with a new gift. It will drive her crazy wondering what present she’ll get the next day. Clothing, jewelry, perfume, lingerie, makeup, shoes. Win her over before you introduce her to your grandparents so they don’t ruin it for you.”

“You’re such a good friend.”

“I’d probably be brain injured myself if you didn’t fight off those guys we beat for the championship.”

I put my hand on his arm. “Peaches is trying to convince my girl to let her keep fucking me.”

He sighed real deep. “She has no idea how much I love her.”

“You still haven’t proposed? You’ve been carrying around that ring forever.”

“I’m waiting for the right moment.”

“I think your girlfriend is gonna make me fuck her again. I hope you find your moment soon.”

“Shit. Maybe I’ll just throw the damn ring away.”

The girls suddenly got up and we turned, expecting them to be clawing each other. Damn it! Instead, they waved us over and we followed them out of the bar and across the parking lot to our motel room.

“If Peaches can convince my girl to let her keep fucking me,” I told him, “then she’s gonna be one hell of a lawyer.”

In the room, the girls ordered us to undress. For a moment they looked like they were gonna grab our clothes and run out laughing. But no. Instead the girls kissed.

“Where’s my camera phone?” I wailed, searching frantically through my blue jeans.

No one said anything, so I walked around them, taking pictures and video. They sure took their time undressing each other. His big tall blond with my little skinny Latina — wow! They moved to the bed and did a mini-69, sucking each other’s tits.

“Who should I fuck?” I asked my girlfriend, my throbbing boner demanding action.

“Lay on your back,” she ordered me.

Peaches mounted me while her boyfriend took pictures, then he wiggled his cock up her butt while my girlfriend took video. As we double-teamed her, my girl sat on my face. Until a tangy flavor tased my tongue, I had forgotten that I had cum in her. I never expected to taste my own jism. I don’t regret the experience, but I’d rather not ever taste it again. Thank God she came quick to wash out the awful flavor. Peaches started shrieking like a bird, her face turning colors as she bathed my cock in her cum. Her boyfriend pulled out to wash his penis in the sink. My girl roughly pushed her off my dick and off the bed. She landed with a loud thunk. I would have laughed, but my Mexican sat on my pole and saluted the flag.

Then it got weird. Once her pussy swallowed my entire cock, she bent over and wiggled her ass. My best friend lubed himself up again and I knew when he penetrated her by the high-pitched scream in my face that Five Hour Energy should put in a pill. My girlfriend cursed in Spanish as my buddy worked his way up her anus. I swear the double penetration dilated her eyes.

“Cum up my girlfriend’s ass!” I told my best friend.

My girl bravely held out for several minutes before collapsing — the first time she ever came quiet. She felt like a human blanket on top of me, warm like one of those plug-in thermal comforters. That slobbers. My bud could now cum, too, so he fixed her ass and flanked her position. He nailed her harder and faster, his face almost angry in concentration. When he came, I’m pretty sure I heard it. He looked like he was having an epileptic attack in slow motion. Except for all the groaning.

My girl just purred, with my cock still filling her pussy, as my best friend flooded her anal cavity with jism.

“You were right,” she coughed to Peaches, still in a semi-coma on the ground. “That was unbelievable.” She turned to me. “Fuck her until you cum so I can suck your juice out of her.”

“Okay.” What? Was I suppose to argue?

I fucked Peaches right there on the floor, her ankles on my shoulders and drilling her deep like a rig in the Gulf of Mexico. Her orgasms came like waves on a beach, several minutes apart, but still swamping the shoreline. I had cum twice that night, so it took a lot of pounding before I gave her my last two drops. By that time she was either begging for mercy or whimpering in Yiddish.

“Throw her on the bed,” the Mexican ordered us.

Her boyfriend and I picked up Peach’s naked, spent body and tossed her on the mattress. My girl climbed on top and went down on her, slurping my cum out of her pussy while Peaches stuck her tongue up my girlfriend’s ass to taste her boyfriend’s juice as he recorded everything.

I stood up, my cock swinging between my knees like a grandfather clock. I wanted to finish my damn beer at the bar, but somebody probably already drank it. So, instead, I rifled through my bud’s jeans until I found the engagement ring he carried around. After the girls made each other cum, I got on one knee and held up the ring.

“The only thing that could make me happier right this minute is if you say you will marry me.”

“Yes, motherfucker, yes!” My girl jumped in my arms and wrapped her legs around me like a python.

“Hey! That’s my ring,” my best friend complained.

“You said you were just going to throw it away,” I argued.

“I said, maybe!”

“What?” Peaches looked stunned. Eyes blank, jaw slack, expression confused. So that’s how I normally look. “You bought me a ring? You want to marry me?”

Her boyfriend looked sheepish, so I helped him out. “He’s had it forever, but is too much of a pussy to give it to you.”

“You can’t give this to me if he meant to give it to her,” my girl said. She gave it back and we both looked about to cry.

“Move your cock out of the way so I can propose,” he told me. Still naked, I grabbed the camera phone and set it on video. He got down on one knee, held up the ring, and asked Peaches to marry him. I think maybe Peaches had a heart attack cuz she started twitching like that homeless guy on the corner of 9 ^th and Main.

“Yes, you wonderful bastard! Yes, I will marry you.”

Well, now we were all crying. “I only have seven thousand in the bank. Maybe you should pick out the ring cuz I don’t know girl stuff.”

She smiled at me through her tears. “You are the perfect husband for me.”

“Will you be with me forever?” I asked, a little scared.

“You’re gonna stretch my pussy so much that no other man will ever be able to take your place.” I guess she could tell that I didn’t understand if that was a yes or no. “So, yes, I will stay with you forever.”

The four of us group-hugged. Then had sex again.