The Perfect Husband

CHAPTER 4

Her mama was my wife’s best friend. They talked on Facebook video chat every day. No one’s opinion meant more to her than her mother’s so I wanted to make a good impression.

When her mother first visited, she didn’t seem to understand why her smart daughter married someone who couldn’t pick out his own clothes. Her abusive alcoholic father was a mariachi singer who apparently had many children he never raised.

“Mom, he will never leave me, never hit me, and never let another man hit me,” my wife told her mother. “He provides for his family, he makes me feel safe, and he makes me laugh. What more could I possibly want from a husband?”

“He sure is easy to look at,” mom confessed. My wife laughed, ordered me to strip, and the dear lady applauded like I was a rock star. “Is that real?” my mother-in-law asked, eyes bigger than dinner plates.

“Go see for yourself.”

They looked more like sisters than mother-daughter cuz she had my wife so young, so I had no problem getting hard when she touched it. She jumped back as my penis sprang at her like a rattlesnake.

“Get on your knees, mom, and suck my husband’s giant cock.”

My wife likes me to slap her face with it, but it surprised my mother-in-law so much that she fell back with a yell. All three of us laughed, me most of all.

“Will you be this beautiful when you’re older?” I asked my wife, who jumped in the air like she was spiking a football.

“That’s why I married him! That right there. Not even the smartest men can come up with shit like that. It’s like God installed a Hallmark inside him. You remember how dad would say something insensitive that would just crush us? My husband is the opposite of my dad. I’ll be, like, zoning out, then he’ll say something magical that makes me feel loved. My husband says things so special it’s like they come with flowers.”

My mother-in-law cried while smiling up at me. “You really think I’m pretty?”

“Throw some big titties on you and I’d be hard all the time. You should live with us so I can enjoy the two best looking women in the county.”

“You see what I mean?” my wife asked her mother. “And you know he’s sincere cuz he’s got no guile. There’s no filter between his heart and his mouth, but he lacks the manure factory that makes other guys spew out bullshit all the time. He may not be good with numbers, but with women he is the smartest man in the world.”

“Show her the titties I bought you,” I urged my wife, proud of my purchase. She tore off her blouse to reveal a flat tummy and two monster mounds. “With a rack like that, you could have any man in the world.”

I wasn’t sure if she was laughing or crying. “Take off her clothes so I can see what the rest of her looks like.”

My wife undressed her mother and my dick flopped around like a break dancer.

“My python doesn’t lie,” I told her, as she watched my cock harden at the sight of her. I picked her up cuz girls liked to be held. But she’s so pretty my dick starting poking her like a mugger looking for a wallet. She grabbed my schlong and I heard a moan so deep that I thought we needed an exorcist. Well, now I needed to get me some, so I kissed my mother-in-law’s neck and worked my way to her lips. For such a reserved lady, she sure surprised me by grabbing my head with both hands and thrusting her tongue down my throat. How’d she know I loved that?

My wife guided us to the bed and made me lay on my back. Her mother got between my legs and tried to get my penis in her mouth. My wife walked her through it while I smiled at the ceiling. I guess she heated up too much, cuz she suddenly mounted me. My wife helped her get it in.

“Ooooooof!” my wife’s mother said once my penis head expanded her hole.

“Go slow, mama!” my little Mexican urged her.

It took a long time and I couldn’t be happier, seeing my wife so happy. By the time she got the whole thing in, she looked like she ran a marathon. She leaned forward to make it easier to go up and down, but after just a minute she opened her mouth to scream, and nothing came out. Fuck, I thought my dick killed her. It wouldn’t be the first time.

Nope! She just came for the first time in her life.

“What was that?” she asked, terrified by her body’s reaction. My wife said something in Spanish. “That’s an orgasm? You mean, all this time I could have been having those? Damn your father to hell!”

“Would you like another?” I asked, cuz I liked making them happy.

“I can have another?”

I laughed. “You can have as many as you want. I’d do anything to make my wife happy. Like when she told me to tear grandpa’s arms off when he demanded sex. I barely dislocated his shoulder when he apologized.”

My mother-in-law rode me to another one, finally getting the hang of it. Too exhausted to continue, I threw her on all fours and fucked her doggy until she screamed into the pillow. Then I flipped her over and pounded her missionary until her body shook like a baby rattle. By then she had an odd smile, like those mannequins who look like they want to talk. Finally, I laid on my back and pulled her on top of me in a 69. My wife taught me how to give oral sex — yeah, it took a long time, and I got the scratches to prove it. I now showed off my expertise on my mother-in-law’s pussy and she flipped and flopped like a fish in a net while trying to suck my used pole. When she exploded onto my face, it took her several minutes to recover. My wife recorded everything to show her father how real men please women.

“I also married him for that,” she told her mother.

I still needed to get off. My wife taught me never to cum unless she finished first, but now it was my turn. I planted a knee on either side of my mother-in-law’s head and spanked my monkey like Tarzan. The poor lady looked scared, so my wife whispered to her in Spanish. It must have worked because she opened her mouth when I said I was gonna blow. I hadn’t cum since before I went to work, so I had a full load. I emptied myself in her mouth. My first shot must have filled some cavities from the surprised look on her face. She swallowed in order to clear her air passage, then bobbed on my pole to drain me of every drop, like a bulldog locked on the mailman’s ankle.

“Cum tastes so much better after several orgasms!” she concluded happily.

Another satisfied customer.

My wife thus shared me with her mother, who enjoyed me so much that she moved in to help take care of the kids. She’d make me a delicious empanada for every orgasm I gave her, so I kept her busy in the kitchen. Our kids even learned Spanish, which made me real proud.

I knew my wife liked me because she always wanted to have sex. She’d lock the door and tell the kids to fuck off. Shit, I’d do anything she asked. She called me her fucking machine. People talk in front of me, so I know lots of women say they love their man, but they don’t fuck them every day, so my girl must love me something special.