The Secret Cardinal

62

The darkness that enveloped Kilkenny fell away as if he were rising from a watery abyss toward a sunlit surface. Through lidded eyes, he sensed the light’s increasing warmth and intensity. Awareness returned slowly, burning through the fog clouding his mind.

A warm breeze stroked his face, and he felt a ripple lap softly against his cheek. Reflexively, he licked an errant droplet from his lips.

Water.

The dual sensations of touch and taste triggered recognition and a trickle of conscious thoughts.

I’m in the water, he reasoned, but where?

His memory was elusive. Everything before this moment seemed a blur, images too fleeting to grasp. Nolan remembered water, but not the warm liquid that now cradled his buoyant form. That distant recollection was of a briny sea as cold as death.

A shadow crossed his face, eclipsing the sun. He felt a hand settle gently against the back of his head, and then a pair of lips met his. The kiss was slow and lingering and bespoke the simmering passion of a woman for the love of her life.

‘Are you going to float here all day?’ she asked, her lips still close to his, her voice melodic and familiar.

‘Maybe.’

She laughed and kissed him again before pulling away, wading toward shore. Nolan allowed his legs to sink and his feet landed on a firm bed of smooth sand. He stood and found himself chest-deep in a placid lake, the sun at its midsummer zenith high overhead, and before him the soft curves of rolling dunes along the Lake Michigan shore.

Like Venus, Kelsey slowly emerged from the lake. Nolan stood speechless, watching his wife rise from the water leaving no ripple in her wake. Her long blonde mane dangled between her shoulder blades in a taut French braid. A sheen of water glistened on her tan, slender form, and Nolan smiled when he recognized the brightly colored bikini she had bought for their honeymoon.

Nolan didn’t see anyone else but sensed they were not alone. He watched as Kelsey moved up the beach toward a large umbrella that shaded an old beach quilt she had loved since childhood. Something stirred in the shadow, and Kelsey bent down and gently lifted what he knew was their infant son. When she turned toward him, a naked Toby nuzzled contentedly against her breast.

His heart ached at the scene — the future he dreamed of and lost was so tantalizingly close — yet all his desire could not will himself toward shore.

‘You know you have to go back,’ Kelsey said in that tone she used to lovingly cajole him out of bed in the morning.

‘I can’t lose you both again.’

‘Nolan, you never lost us. Toby and I are home. And we will be here for you when the time comes. Don’t stop swimming, my love. Keep swimming.’

Keep swimming? Nolan tried to move his arms and legs but they were leaden. An icy current pulled him away from shore, and the light faded to total blackness.