The Secret Life of Marilyn Monroe

Returning to the Safety of Sinatra

In the months following her release from the hospital, Marilyn Monroe reconciled with the man she now considered a savior, Joe DiMaggio. Both decided, however, not to make their relationship official but rather to keep it informal and without strings. Over the years, it has been reported in biographies that the two planned to wed again. It simply isn’t true. In fact, a major obstacle between them was that Marilyn was interested in reviving her career at this time, and Joe was still steadfastly against her having one. No one in Marilyn’s life at the time felt she was going to revisit that problem with him. It would only be many years after the fact that certain people who didn’t know her well began to speculate that she would have remarried DiMaggio. As we will later see, she even began to date Frank Sinatra again during this time, so clearly she wasn’t thinking of marrying Joe. Moreover, none of the baseball great’s friends or associates interviewed for this book felt that he was interested in another marriage to her, either. However, that said, he had definitely changed in certain ways. Whereas in their marriage he was cold and distant and even abusive, now he was caring and loving and seemed to want to do whatever he could to make her happy. He told her that if he had been her a few years back, he would have divorced him, too. Moreover, he said that it was because of a psychotherapist that Marilyn had recommended that he was able to become a better and more well-adjusted person. Still, at times he could be alarmingly possessive and—as in old times—jealous of the attention she received everywhere they went together. Also, he was still quite invasive of her privacy. For instance, according to Berniece Miracle, he would go through her trash, looking for receipts to see just how much she had paid for certain items. Always the penny-pincher, if he thought the amount was too high, he would angrily confront her about it, receipt in hand. Inevitably, Marilyn would snatch the paper from his hand and tell him to mind his own business. “How dare you go through my trash!” she’d say, very upset. This exchange usually ended in a loud argument. Marilyn tried her best to ignore such moments, but it was difficult for her.

In March 1961, the couple took a relaxing vacation to a secluded resort in Redington Beach, Florida. Marilyn certainly needed the break. Just before they left, she became very upset about an article that was published that quoted Kay Gable (wrongly, as it would happen) saying that she believed Marilyn was responsible for her husband’s death. “John [Springer, Marilyn’s publicist] told me, ‘Do not send this to Marilyn, whatever you do. If she sees this, I don’t know what she’ll do,’ ” said Diane Stevens. “ ‘So, just send it over to Aaron [Frosch, her lawyer.]’ That’s what I did. Then, somehow or another, Marilyn saw the clipping. I think she was in Aaron’s office and it was on his desk. She became unglued over it. ‘How dare you keep this from me!’ she asked me on the phone. ‘I need to know what is going on. I’m the only one who doesn’t know what the hell is going on! You tell John that I am very, very angry about this. I should fire him over this.’ I tried to explain that we were just concerned about her, but she didn’t want to hear it. ‘God damn it,’ she said. ‘Everyone is so concerned about poor, screwed up Marilyn. Poor, poor Marilyn is going cuckoo and can’t handle her own press. I don’t want to hear it. I just don’t want to hear another word about it.’ Then she slammed the phone down. By that time, I was shaking. I told John and he called her right away. Then she let him have it. It was clear that she was very much on edge and not well at all.”

Shortly after, Marilyn received a letter from Kay Gable. It was clear that Gable did not blame Marilyn for her husband’s death. In the letter, dated April 11, 1961, she wrote, “I miss Clark each day more, I’ll never get over this great loss, but God has blessed me with my three great children and precious memories.… Went to confession after 24 years (hope the priest did not call the cops), seriously, you do not know how much this has helped me.” Marilyn would soon visit Kay as well; there were certainly not hard feelings from Kay, though that didn’t seem to assuage Marilyn’s own sense of guilt.

At the end of April, Marilyn decided to take another apartment in Los Angeles. It was then that she learned the news that her friend Pat Kennedy Lawford was pregnant with her fourth child. “I remember Pat saying, ‘I don’t even know how to tell Marilyn this news, considering what’s going on in her life. I’m afraid it’ll make her even sadder,’ ” said a relative of Pat’s. “ ‘I already have three kids. She just wants one.’ Of course, she had no choice but to tell her when Marilyn was back in Los Angeles. By that time she was about six months pregnant. She told me later that when Marilyn laid eyes on her, she jumped into the air with excitement. Then she wrapped her arms around Pat and started to cry, she was so happy. It added another dimension, I think, to Pat’s friendship with Marilyn when she realized that Marilyn was able to put aside her own sadness, at least in the moment, and share in Pat’s joy. She told me, ‘I think she’s a wonderful woman and would make such a great mother. I pray every night that she has a child soon. I know it would change her life if she had someone else to be worried about.’ ”

During this time, as mentioned earlier, Marilyn rekindled her romance with Frank Sinatra. It’s not known how Joe DiMaggio felt about Marilyn and Frank, or even if it mattered. Clearly, Joe and Marilyn had an understanding about their relationship as it stood at this time, because Marilyn would likely not have been dating Frank if Joe had strenuously objected to it. For his part, though he was dating Juliet Prowse at the time, Frank was still attracted to Marilyn and, according to those who knew them well, couldn’t resist her. “He was in love with her, no doubt about it,” said Milt Ebbins, who was a good friend of Sinatra’s and also vice president of Peter Lawford’s production company, Chrislaw.

“By 1961, though, his feeling about her was more protective than passionate. I remember that there was an incident involving President Kennedy, who was new in office at the time. Peter and I arranged a luncheon for Kennedy, and Frank was invited. We had a special chef flown in from New York to cook fettuccine Alfredo, veal picatta, and a salad and ice cream at the end. Sinatra’s secretary called at the last minute and said he couldn’t make it, that he had a cold. I was astonished. This is JFK. He can’t stand up JFK. I knew Frank loved that guy, had campaigned for him, organized his inaugural entertainment, so it seemed strange. I found out later that what happened was that Marilyn was staying with him for the weekend and had left the house without telling him where she was going. He was frantic with worry. So he spent the day driving around trying to find her, and he did. She was out shopping. So that shows you how much he cared about her, if he was willing to miss a luncheon with the president so that he could figure out what the hell happened to Marilyn.”

Rupert Allan confirmed, “I always thought of Frank and Marilyn as star-crossed lovers. In a different time and place, they would have been together. He loved her a lot. However, by 1961, she was in so much turmoil, I think he was annoyed with her a lot of the time. He just thought she should have worked harder to pull it together so, yes, sometimes she pissed him off. Also, Sinatra certainly didn’t want to be involved with anyone who would be considered weak or vulnerable.”

Indeed, women like Marilyn were usually too much trouble for him. He liked his “dames” to have more inner strength and self-reliance, like Ava Gardner and his mother, Dolly Sinatra, both of whom represented his ideal of the total woman. He often didn’t have the patience necessary to deal with someone as conflicted as Marilyn. Just recently released from a mental hospital, Marilyn was not on sure footing when she was with Sinatra, and he wasn’t exactly tolerant with her. For instance, at one gathering at his home, Marilyn began to become emotional, was sharing sad childhood stories to guests. She seemed on the verge of an intense crying jag, only to be cut off by Frank. “Look, Norma Jeane,” he said, “we don’t want to hear it. Toughen up, baby, or get the hell out. I ain’t no babysitter.” She got up and bolted to her bedroom.

Some people in Sinatra’s circle thought that the only reason he was with her was because he felt sorry for her. “If Marilyn Monroe wanted sex, and she did constantly to make herself feel desirable, Mr. S. would play Sir Galahad and rise to the occasion,” said his longtime valet, George Jacobs. “He would rarely turn a good friend down. It fit in with his padrone self-image to give rather than receive. [However,] Mr. S. had a ton of misgivings about Marilyn. She was a total mess.”

People who were in his circle back then still talk about what happened on June 7, 1961—six days after her thirty-fifth birthday—when Frank invited Marilyn to Las Vegas. He was appearing at the Sands and was also planning a party for Dean Martin’s forty-fourth birthday that day. From the Sands interdepartmental correspondence between Jack Entratter, president; Al Guzman, publicity director; and Al Freeman, advertising and promotional director, we can glean that there was a great deal of preparation for the Dean Martin party, some of it concerning Monroe and Sinatra.

One memo, from Entratter to Guzman and Freeman, dated June 6, 1961, states, “Please be advised that under no circumstances is any backstage photographer permitted to photograph Mr. Sinatra and Miss Marilyn Monroe together at the cocktail reception to follow the performance on 7 June. Any photographer who attempts to do so will be permanently barred from the hotel. Be advised that this is not only a Sands requirement, it is a requirement of Mr. Sinatra’s and, as such, will be absolutely enforced. Thank you.”

Another memo, from Entratter to “All Concerned,” also dated June 6, 1961, states, “Marilyn Monroe will be Mr. Sinatra’s guest. It is Mr. Frank Sinatra’s intention that Miss Monroe be accorded the utmost privacy during her brief stay here at the Sands. She will be registered in Mr. Sinatra’s suite. Under no circumstances is she or Mr. Sinatra to be disturbed by telephone calls or visitors before 2 p.m.”

Marilyn’s friend Pat Kennedy Lawford brought her sister, Jean Smith, to Vegas for the opening night. It’s not known whether Pat was aware of what was going on between Marilyn and Frank. Pat and Jean spent the day with Marilyn, getting facials and manicures while gossiping, so perhaps Marilyn mentioned it. “Pat told me she was most concerned about Marilyn,” says Pat Brennan. “She said she was already pouring herself glasses of champagne by noon. Pat was a drinker, too, but at least she waited until cocktail hour. In Vegas, though, Pat wasn’t drinking at all because she was eight months pregnant. ‘When you’re not drinking,’ she told me, ‘you see what everyone else is like when they’re loaded, and it’s not pretty.’ ” According to what Kennedy Lawford relayed to Brennan, she pulled Marilyn aside and told her that she believed her drinking was getting out of hand. “Marilyn, as your friend, I think you should know that when you’re drunk you’re not very becoming.” At first, Marilyn was insulted. But after a few moments, she seemed to realize that Pat was right. “It’s the only way I can keep the voices in my head from getting too loud,” she told her. Pat’s reaction to that startling admission is not known, but likely she was concerned. However, it didn’t stop her and Marilyn’s good time.

Pat had her two-and-a-half-year-old daughter Victoria with her in Las Vegas. Her other three children were to arrive the next day. She was having them carted by stretch limousine from California to Nevada. That day after their beauty treatments, Marilyn and Pat took Victoria gambling. Of course, children weren’t allowed in the casino, but overlooking this rule was the least of the perks afforded the Kennedys whenever they were in Vegas. To Marilyn’s fascination, Pat sat the little girl right on top of the blackjack table and said, “Okay, here’s the deal. If I lose, I’m leaving this kid right here. But if I win, I’ll take her as my prize.” She sat down and played a hand, with Marilyn standing directly behind her. When she lost, she said, “Okay, that’s it. You get the kid.” And she rose and walked away. “But Pat… Pat!” Marilyn shouted after her, very alarmed. Of course, Pat turned around and retrieved her daughter. “She loved doing things like that just to get a reaction from Marilyn,” said Pat Brennan. “She liked to keep it light and easy when she was with Marilyn because she knew Marilyn had so much sadness in her life.”

Also present for Sinatra’s Las Vegas opening that evening were Elizabeth Taylor and her husband Eddie Fisher, as well as, of course, the birthday boy Dean and Jeanne Martin, with whom Monroe sat. “What can I say about Marilyn that night?” Eddie Fisher remarked. “We all knew that she was having a thing with Sinatra, so it was definitely hands off. But she was so drunk that night, I can tell you that she was an embarrassment to him. It wasn’t good.”

“She was beautiful, a vision with a great smile, lots of teased blonde hair, and a dress that was so low-cut you couldn’t take your eyes off her bosom,” said a Las Vegas photojournalist who, along with a photographer for Wide World Photos, was one of the few reporters granted access to the opening-night party in Sinatra’s suite. “From a distance, it was wow, she’s a knockout. But up close it was… oh, no, she’s knocked out! She didn’t look well, and she also acted very strangely. She seemed a little crazy to me.

“At the party, I remember her whining, ‘Oh, Frankie, c’mon, let’s make out for the photographers. I love you, Frankie. I want the whole world to know.’ I remember that she was standing behind him and had her hands around his waist, almost as if she was leaning on him for support.”

According to the journalist, when Frank pulled away rather than be photographed with her, Marilyn almost lost her balance. After giving her a concerned look, he told one of his bodyguards, “Keep an eye on her. I don’t like the way she’s wobblin’. Let me know if she faints, or something.”

The reporter continued, “Marilyn still wanted a picture taken with Frank. She sidled over to him like a kitten and motioned my photographer with her index finger, indicating that he should take the shot while Sinatra wasn’t looking. She was being very playful and coy.

“Just as my photographer was about to take the picture, Frank’s bodyguard grabbed the camera. He gave it to Frank and whispered something in his ear. Then Frank walked to where we were standing and hissed, ‘Next time you try that, I’ll crack your skull open with this goddamn camera, the both of ya.’ I remember that he talked out of the corner of his mouth, like a gangster.

“At that moment, Marilyn came over and, with wild eyes, said, ‘Frankie, I’m gonna throw up.’ He looked alarmed and said, ‘When?’ and she said, ‘Now. Right now. I mean it, Frankie. I’m gonna throw up.’ He said, ‘Oh, Jesus Christ, Marilyn, not again.’ And he got her out of there, quick.”

Elizabeth Taylor, who happened to be standing right next to the reporter, observed the entire scene. Afterward, she turned to the photojournalist and said, “Marilyn shouldn’t drink if she can’t hold her liquor. Now, me,” she added, sounding confident, “I know how to hold my liquor.” With that, Elizabeth flashed her famous violet eyes and threw back a martini. However, when she saw that the reporter had written her comment on his notepad, she grabbed the pad out of his hand, smacked him playfully on the back of the head with it, and said, “Now, that was strictly off the record, buster.”