Varieties of Disturbance

Traveling with Mother

1.

The bus said “Buffalo” on the front, after all, not “Cleveland.” The backpack was from the Sierra Club, not the Audubon Society.

They had said that the bus with “Cleveland” on the front would be the right bus, even though I wasn’t going to Cleveland.

2.

The backpack I had brought with me for this was a very sturdy one. It was even stronger than it needed to be.

I practiced many answers to their possible question about what I was carrying in my backpack. I was going to say, “It is sand for potting plants” or “It is for an aromatherapy cushion.” I would also have told the truth. But they did not search the luggage this time.

3.

In my rolling suitcase I had the metal container, well wrapped in clothes. That was now her home, or her bed.

I had not wanted to put her in the rolling suitcase. I thought that riding on my back she would at least be near my head.

4.

We waited for the bus. I ate an apple so old it was nearly baked like a pie apple.

I don’t know if she, too, heard and was bothered by the recorded announcement. It came over the loudspeaker every few minutes. The bad grammar in the beginning is what would have bothered her: “Due to security reasons…”

5.

Leaving the city felt so final that I thought for a moment my money wouldn’t be good where we were going.

Before, she could not leave her house. Now she is moving.

6.

It has been so long since she and I traveled together.

There are so many places we could go.