Wedded in Scandal

Chapter 9

Robert frowned at his desk, not at all pleased with the correspondence lying before him. There were the usual three piles. The first was a to-do pile of decisions regarding the family investments. It included letters from his stewards, management reports, articles, and a variety of scientific discussions regarding everything from mining to fishing rights. It was a very large pile and it sat at the top of his desk.

At the far left where he really didn’t want to look was the pile he called “family melancholia.” This included his father’s latest ideas, reports about his younger brother’s Grand Tour of debauchery through Europe, and finally the doctor’s missive on his mother’s ailment. She had chronic pain, or so she claimed. Mostly, the woman just sat in the dark and stared at the fire. Some days she didn’t even get out of bed. The pile was dubbed “melancholia” because, despite his best efforts, he had been singularly unable to affect any aspect of that pile. His father had more wild ideas every day; his brother, Jack, obviously planned to seduce every female on the Continent; and his mother would not step out of her room. So whenever he looked at that pile, he was buried beneath a tide of sadness mixed with futility. It had gotten so bad lately that he’d ordered Dribbs to put a full, bushy plant on top of the pile. The man never did, of course, but he did keep a full bottle of brandy nearby.

The third pile was easier to deal with, but no less small. It was simply bills. And his family had a lot of bills.

But none of those piles were the subject of his current disgust. No, what lay before him dead center was two notes. One from the delectable Helaine and another from Charlie, the new mine manager. Helaine’s note held his attention the most. He smiled at the rough linen paper, held it to his nose to detect the faint sprinkling of lemon, and even traced his fingertip over her soft curving letters. Very feminine, to his mind, and also unusually fine penmanship for a girl of the middle classes, even a courtesan. So she must have had a decent education. All of that made him smile. Her words, however, did not.

To Lord Redhill,

Three vendors visited me this morning with offers of credit. Thanks to your efforts, I have hopes of establishing my little shop as a premier dressmaker to the ton. Words cannot adequately express my thanks. All I can do is to offer this humble token of tea for your enjoyment as it reminds me of you. Please know that my deepest expression of gratitude will come to you through your sister. I shall work tirelessly so that she is the most beautiful bride any woman could hope to be.

With humble thanks,

Mrs. H. Mortimer

Robert snorted as he read it through again. He did not want her gratitude, and he certainly did not want it expressed through his sister. The very idea made him slightly queasy. Of course that was clearly the point. It was rather repulsive to think of his mistress also being his sister’s dressmaker. Only a madman would pursue such a thing, especially against both ladies’ wishes.

And yet he could not stop himself. Helaine drew him. She challenged his mind, she roused his protective instincts, and she made him harder than granite. No woman of his acquaintance had ever done all three things. He had barely spent more than a couple hours in her presence and yet he’d spent the better part of the last two days thinking of more ways to intrigue her. Intrigue her, tempt her, then seduce her. That was his plan, and he was spending an inordinate amount of time thinking of ways to do it.

The other letter on his desk was not nearly so enticing. It was from Charlie, the young man who had shown such strength of character down in the mines that one benighted day. After firing the old manager, Robert had promoted Charlie to the job. The boy wrote that the sacked Mr. Hutchins was stirring up the workers. He said that men who had not one month ago cursed Hutchins’s name were now following him as he fostered a revolt. It was all because Robert had shut down the mine for repairs. He would not allow one man, woman, or child inside the damn place until it was safe to do so. But men out of work had little to do but curse the people in charge. And Robert’s other decree, that he would hire no woman and no child under the age of twelve, had hit some families hard. They needed the extra income. Which meant that the whole area was a powder keg of unrest.

Damn. It would take more money and more time to settle this peacefully. And that would take him away from London when he really wished to be with Helaine. Enough dithering, he told himself sternly. It was time for action. So thinking, he grabbed his own stationery and pen. Two minutes later he had invited the lady to share tea with him at a small, intimate café. If she wanted to express her gratitude, then she could do so in person. Where he could persuade her to be more demonstrative of her thanks. A minute later, he rang his bell for Dribbs.

“Dribbs, I need you to send a footman to deliver a note for me, if you would.”

There was a deafening silence as his butler hesitated at the door, neither coming closer to grab the letter nor stepping outside to call for a footman.

Robert looked up with a frown. “Dribbs?”

“Er, might I inquire, my lord, is that perhaps a missive for Mrs. Mortimer, the dressmaker?”

Robert straightened up with a frown. “My correspondence is none of your concern, Dribbs, just the delivery. Any competent butler would know that.”

The man colored a dark red to the tips of his ears, but he did not back down. “Of course, my lord,” he said. “But it may interest you to know that I also received a note from Mrs. Mortimer.”

Robert felt his eyebrows rise almost into his hairline. “Did you?” he asked, his voice deceptively low. “I can’t imagine what about.”

“Well, my lord, she bade me to make a pot of your new tea directly, and…um…”

“Spit it out, man.”

He didn’t spit it out. In fact, he dashed out of the room only to return a second later with the tea tray. On it was a steaming pot of tea, presumably with the leaves already brewing. The tea, he recalled, that Helaine had sent. The tea that reminded her of him. He took a tentative sniff and felt his sinuses clear. Good Lord, but that was strong stuff. Meanwhile, Dribbs finished setting out the tray, but he didn’t leave. Instead he stood there, still flushed a dark red, and with a clear apology in his eye.

“She said something else, didn’t she?” Robert asked.

“Yes, my lord. She said if you were to write her a letter or in any way try to contact her, I was supposed to give you something. And say something.”

Robert leaned back, surprise and pleasure slipping through his mind. “Go on.”

“She said that she hopes you enjoy this rather strong, almost overbearing brew. And that while you are drinking, you might enjoy some reading material.” At which point, Dribbs held out a political pamphlet.

Robert took it, frowning as he saw an unfamiliar woman’s name as the author. A quick glance, however, had him bursting out with laughter. The opening lines asked these questions: Why can’t women have productive careers? Why are we forced to choose between becoming a wife or a whore with nothing in between? It went on to claim that a woman without a man was perforce expected to become a mistress. She was barred from most legitimate trades and occupations. And even the lower orders such as maids and cooks were subjected to the lewd and unwanted advances of their employers. Almost as if the men believed that if a woman had no protector, she must wish to be a whore.

The message from Helaine was obvious. Coupled with her statement that this overbearing tea reminded her of him, she was sending him a well-deserved slap. After all, she had refused him. And when he thought to ignore her refusal, she turned his own butler against him.

“Clever woman,” he said as he continued to scan the pamphlet. Sadly, he did indeed recognize the attitudes described in the treatise. Other men of his set, and certainly his own father, believed the female staff existed to serve his needs—sexual and otherwise. He had not until this moment put himself in that category.

Meanwhile, Dribbs was shifting awkwardly from foot to foot, obviously nervous about his employer’s reaction. Robert barely spared him a glance.

“Never fear, Dribbs. You are not about to be punished, but do try to recall that you work for me and not Mrs. Mortimer.”

“Of course, my lord. Did you…would you still like me to call a footman for your letter?”

“No, no. I shall have to write something else now.” Then, while Dribbs was bowing himself out, Robert took his first sip of the tea, which surprised him by being rather delightful. It was bold, strong, and with a hint of something sweet underneath that kept it from being crass. In truth, it reminded him of her.

He continued to sip his tea and think of her. He also read her pamphlet from cover to cover, then, when that was done, he turned his attention back to Charlie and the difficulties at the mine. It was another hour before he realized he was stuck. And another hour beyond that before he was rescued and from a most unusual source: Gwen’s fiancé.

The boy was of a lanky build and quiet demeanor and had the rather prosaic name of Edward. His father had died of a fever some years back, so he had inherited the baronetcy as well as a parcel of domineering women in his mother and an aunt who had been a stern schoolteacher. He had a younger brother who was off at school and a sister who was growing up to resemble the mother, more’s the pity. And yet, this quiet, henpecked boy, who looked just like an Edward ought, had somehow captivated the vivacious Lady Gwen.

Exactly how he had done it was a mystery Robert wanted to solve. And given that Robert was doing nothing more than sipping cold tea and staring at correspondence that annoyed him, the sound of Edward’s voice in the hallway was a welcome distraction. When the boy requested a moment of his time, it seemed like a gift from heaven. When Dribbs opened the door, Robert bade the boy to please sit down, by God. He ordered something stronger than tea, too, though, given this tea, he wasn’t sure anything but a stiff brandy would qualify.

“Hello, hello, Edward,” Robert began with a warm smile. “What brings you here this afternoon?”

“Escaping my mother and aunt, of course,” said the boy as he dropped into the leather chair by the fire. “Must tell you how sorry I am that we rented the house next door. You’re not used to having all those women squawking about, and I’ve talked to them about making too free with your door, but they don’t listen. Not yet, at least. But if you want them barred, I’ll see to it.”

Robert took a moment to stare at the boy. Edward wasn’t fidgeting, just sitting there with an open-eyed honesty. “You’re asking me if I want to bar your mother from my doorstep a few weeks before your wedding?”

“My mother, my aunt, and my sister. Yes, my lord. And myself, too, if you wish, though I’d be sad ’bout that, you understand.”

“But you’re about to marry my sister.”

The boy grinned. “Exactly. I’m stuck with my kin, you see, but you aren’t. And I can’t see the point of upsetting my future brother-in-law just because my mother likes to poke around where she’s not wanted.”

Robert tried to think back. “Has she poked herself somewhere she wasn’t wanted?”

“Well, she did rearrange your mother’s thingy-bobs.”

Robert raised his eyebrows. “Thingy-bobs?”

“A shepherdess and her flock, I believe. In the salon.”

Oh, that. He remembered now.

“And she bought your mother perfume, too, I believe.”

Robert was busy unstopping the brandy bottle but he did manage to raise an eyebrow. “Why would I be insulted by a gift of perfume?”

“Well, she gave it to your mum by way of saying that the lady smelled and this would sweeten her up.”

Robert released a snort of amusement. “My mother does smell badly at times. So maybe she will take the hint.”

“And then she forced your mum to take a walk. All but abducted her. I doubt Mum could have done it alone, but she had my aunt and sis with her. To hear them tell it, they grabbed both of your mum’s arms and just lifted. Then didn’t stop until they were blocks away.”

Robert set the brandy down, his mouth slack with astonishment. “They forced my mother to walk with them?”

“Yes, my lord.”

“But she hasn’t been out of the house in…in three years.”

“So I was given to understand. Which was the final straw, you see. I don’t listen to half what they say, but that was too much. If your mother’s of a delicate constitution, she won’t be proof against the women of my family. They’re too much for most men, you see. And, well, I wouldn’t want to overset something you had placed in balance. But that’s what my mum does, you see. Oversets things that are in balance. Which leaves the rest of us to put everything back in order.”

“You mean you do it,” Robert said. “You put everything back in balance.”

“Well, I am the man of the household. It is my duty, and all.”

“By asking me if I want to bar your family from my door.”

“Yes, my lord.”

Robert just stared at the boy. The man wasn’t more than twenty-two years old. He hadn’t even fully grown into his adult stature yet. He was too lanky by half, too much arms and legs and ears. And he did have rather large ears. Yet here he was, talking to a future earl about balance and barring his mother and the like.

“My God, that’s how you caught her,” he breathed, shock in every syllable.

“My lord?”

“That’s how you caught Gwen. You…you balanced her.”

Edward’s mouth dropped a measure, and his face colored up to his ears. “I can’t say that I would ever manage your sister as such. That’s not at all—”

“Of course it is!” Robert cried as he set down the brandy to lean forward onto his knees. “Tell me what you did. Gwen is lively, she likes to dance, and she—forgive me, Edward—she never would have noticed you in the usual way. You don’t dress well enough, you aren’t even in London for most of the Season, and she even told me you hate dancing.”

Edward nodded his head. “Got no sense of timing. Been told that since I was a boy.”

“Well, then, what in God’s name did you do to stop my sister in her tracks?”

“Oh, she did walk right on past me, my lord. Time and time again.”

“Come on, out with it, boy. How’d you stop her?”

“I asked her to help me get a wallflower some dances. A particular friend of my sister’s, actually. Very shy gel.”

Robert leaned back in his chair. “But isn’t that a gentleman’s job?”

“Of course it is, and I had already danced with all the wallflowers. But as you said, I don’t come to town that often. I had no influence over the other men at the dances…”

“But she did. My sister knows everyone and was courted by just about everyone.”

The boy grinned. “She does and she was. Up until I spilled some lemonade on both ladies…” He paused, his ears once again coloring. “Begging your pardon, but that is exactly what I did. Splashed it everywhere, I fear, and then I…well, I convinced her to help out Debra. Find a man for the girl. But of course, she didn’t really know Debra or what kind of man she needed.”

“But you did?”

Edward shrugged. “She’s a friend of my sister’s from school. Came to stay with us one summer. Two years older than Connie but painfully shy.”

He frowned, thinking back. “Was that the wedding of a Debra Smythe to Sir Henry Barnes? Good Lord, you arranged that? Gwen talked of nothing else for months!”

Edward raised his hands in denial. “I did nothing of the sort! That was all Gwen’s doing. I just pointed out the girl.” When Robert obviously didn’t understand, Edward set down his own glass of brandy—untouched—and attempted to explain. “They’ve all got good hearts, you know. My mother and aunt, too. They just can’t see how someone would want to sit in one’s room for years on end.”

He was talking about Robert’s mother. “I don’t understand it, either, but it’s what she says she wants.”

Edward nodded. “And you and I respect that, but not them. They think that deep down she wants to go out, so they force her to whether she thinks she wants it or not.”

And maybe it was all to the good. Maybe that was exactly what his mother needed. Robert resolved to visit her later today to see if she had improved or was worsened by the interference. “But that still doesn’t tell me how it got you engaged to Gwen.”

“Gwen was bored, and Debra was terrified. All I needed to do was point out the imbalance to them both and they worked to solve it by themselves.”

Robert remembered that Season, what little of it he paid attention to. Debra was Gwen’s project. Debra seemed to be ever so grateful for the help, and eventually true love blossomed for Miss Smythe. “But how does that win you Gwen?”

“Well, once she was in balance, her good sense was restored. And there I was, being the humble progenitor of her success. So long as I didn’t interfere in whatever she was doing, she and I got along famously.”

“Famously,” Robert echoed. “That’s not what I remember.” Actually the courtship had been rather tempestuous, but no one had expected anything less from Gwen. In fact, Robert had sometimes wondered if all of his mother’s spirit had been poured into Gwen at an early age.

“Well,” Edward said as he ducked his head to take a sip of his brandy, “you asked how I got her attention. Not how I kept it.”

But Robert already knew the answer to that. Edward was an extraordinarily levelheaded young man. And that was exactly what Gwen needed. “All you did was point out a problem.”

“And step back out of the way. That’s most important.”

“Yes, with Gwen that certainly would be.” And could that, perhaps, be the solution to not one but two of his own problems? After all, what he needed was an innovative business approach to satisfy the miners and still allow the mine to be profitable. Sadly, he was fresh out of ideas, as were all of his usual confidants. There was only one other person he could think of who had already demonstrated an ability to think of different solutions and had the boldness to see them through.

Helaine, of course. After all, she was the one who’d made the unheard-of request for him to pay in advance of service. She was also the one to suggest that Gwen—an unwed girl—be allowed to make her own decisions regarding her funds. Could it be as simple as pointing Helaine at a problem and seeing if she had a solution? He had nothing to lose, especially as he had already exhausted all his other choices. Even if she had no new ideas, he would still count it a success if it got him deeper into her confidence.

“Point them at a problem,” he said.

“And then step out of the way,” said Edward.

“Well, of course,” said Robert, not really listening. He was thinking instead of exactly what he would do once he got deep into Helaine’s confidence. Of all the things he could do to her. And that she would do to him. “I’m not really the interfering sort.”

“Er, that’s not exactly how Gwen describes you.”

“What?” Edward started to respond, but Robert waved him to silence. He didn’t really want to hear what Gwen thought of him. “Look, I won’t bar the door to your relations. To my mind, I’ve been spectacularly unable to help my mum, so if your mum can do what I can’t, then I shan’t interfere. But I do have one request.”

“Name it.”

“Have Gwen bring all the women here to get their dresses made. She can set up the dressmaker in one of the upstairs rooms. We’ve got women up to the rafters. Don’t see why we can’t have them all involved in the project. And if it gets my mum bathed and out of her bedroom, then all the better.”

Edward frowned, obviously stunned. “You cannot wish to have all those women running around your home.”

Robert grinned because he didn’t much care about all the women. Just one. One beautiful dressmaker who would sleep a staircase away. “Nonsense,” he said. “I’ll just hole up in here or at my club. Won’t make a bit of difference to me.”

So it was done. Between that and asking for Helaine’s advice, she was sure to tumble into his arms inside a week.