The Only One

Chapter 22

Finals are the excuse that colleges use to torture students. They say it’s to test them on everything they’ve learned for the semester, but really it’s just to find something to either make or break students.

The classes in my English major had final papers, so no tests for them, but I still had three other classes that required final tests. I’d always been a good student, but I’d started missing a lot of classes with everything that was going on physically. The distraction of John also didn’t help.

Are you coming over?

His texts were even more frequent. I wondered if this meant we were exclusive and if he considered me his girlfriend. I knew I didn’t want to be with anyone else, but I couldn’t tell him that. I was still trying to keep everything in check. I was falling way too hard.

Studying. Shouldn’t you be doing the same thing?

I picked up my Spanish book. My final was Saturday morning at eight. Whoever thought of that was seriously nuts, but all of the foreign language finals were scheduled on a Saturday, which also meant that I had a little over a week to finish all of my online homework and then hopefully understand enough Spanish to pass a scantron test.

My phone buzzed again and I expected it to be a text from John, but instead Monica’s face was smiling back at me. I unlocked the phone and answered it.

“Hey, people actually still have conversations on these things?”

Monica laughed at the other end. “Yeah, yeah. I’m driving and I didn’t want to text and drive.”

“Should you be talking and driving?”

“I’m doing it aren’t I? Don’t argue with me, I’m calling to see if you want a study date.”

I put my worksheet in my Spanish book and closed it. “You aren’t going to study with Trey?”

“Have you ever tried to study with Trey?” Her turn signal beeped in the background. “Don’t get me wrong, I love the guy, but we either end up arguing politics or making out and I actually need to get something done. That’s why I’m calling you because you’re the best motivator.”

I wished I still had the motivation I used to. At the beginning of the school year I did nothing but go to classes and work. Now all I thought about was John and cancer. I still had another biopsy after finals and I was eager to get the results and just get back to normalcy. Well, as normal as I could be.

“Yeah. I guess we can motivate each other. Where to?”

“Wanna just hit the library? I’m heading back from the grocery store, so I can meet you there in like half an hour.”

“Sounds good to me.”

I hung up the phone and then texted John that I was meeting Monica at the library. He texted back with a sad face. As much as I wanted to see him, I did need to study. And gossip with Monica.

Monica sat at a desk on the second floor above a sunken living room area.

“Hey Mon.” I plopped down in the chair across from her. She was unpacking a textbook and her laptop from her messenger bag, but looked up when I sat down.

“Hey, Mel. I’m not used to seeing you out of uniform or without your manboy on your arm.

I smirked. “I could say the same thing about you.”

She rolled her eyes. “Touché. But I’m ditching the boy tonight for some studying and girl time. You’re worth it, pookie.”

“Did you just give me a cutesy nickname like we have some sort of a girlmance?”

She nodded. “I did. Are you going to do something about it? Like take me out on a kickass Christmas date?”

“So, we’re doing Christmas dates now, too? Not just study dates?” I pulled out my Spanish book and set it down on the desk.

“Well, if I don’t gouge my eyeballs out from studying, I do need to get Trey a Christmas gift at some point. He convinced me to spend Christmas Eve day with the Chapman family and I have no idea what to get him or what to get his parents and it’s a big cluster. It gives me more of a headache than my Physics class.” Monica rubbed her temples.

“Did you invite me here to study or to talk about Trey and Christmas?”

“Both.” She put her hands down.

“You know I can’t resist a girl chat.”

She beamed. “Okay, so you’re way better at this gift giving thing than I am. What do I get for the boy who has everything? And how about his upper crest family?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I barely know what to get my mom and sister this year and I’m not sure if I’m supposed to get my dad something.”

She blew a stray strand of her wavy, red hair out of her eye. “This was way easier when we could just paint everyone a picture in our kindergarten class and call it a day.” She rifled through some papers in her messenger bag and then stopped. “What are you getting for John Boy, anyway?”

“A gift for John? I’m not even sure how we’re defining our relationship or whatever it is.” I blinked. I never even thought about getting him something. I usually got the same video game for Robby every year and we dated all through high school. I didn’t technically know what me and John were and if it qualified for gift giving.

She leaned in, raising an eyebrow. “Is he getting you something?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. We haven’t talked about the holidays.”

“Christmas break isn’t even two weeks away and you haven’t talked about your plans with him?”

I guess I’d been more concerned about what came after Christmas. My next biopsy to find out if there was still cancer on my cervix was scheduled for December 22nd. They said I’d have the results back by the new year, which felt like the longest stretch of time in my life.

“And speak of the devil.” Monica folded her arms across her chest and looked over my shoulder, smirking.

I turned to find Trey and John walking toward us.

“Fancy meeting you two here,” John said, unzipping his jacket as he approached our table.

Monica shook her head. “Trey Chapman, I told you that I was studying with Melanie. I didn’t think that was an invitation for you to join us.”

Trey shoved his hands in his coat pockets. It was much too fancy to be a winter coat with its soft, gray material and tons of buttons. “I’m here to make sure that the Alpha Mus who signed up for study hours are actually here and John Boy said he was ditched by Melanie, so he said he would come with.”

“Lame excuse.” Monica rolled her eyes.

He bent over and kissed the top of Monica’s head. “I really am here to check on the study group. And if I get to see you at the same time, then it’s not so bad.”

She scowled at him, but her body language said something different. She was relaxed and smiling like she enjoyed his attention. “Some of us need to study, but maybe you forgot that since you seem to just retain everything by osmosis.”

Trey’s smiled broadened. “I assure you that I need to study and if my girlfriend would like to discuss our State and Local Government final, I wouldn’t be opposed.”

“Oh, I’ve already got that one locked down.”

“Really?” He raised an eyebrow.

John leaned over and whispered. “I love it when they debate. It’s better than Judge Judy.”

I had to agree. The liberal girl and the conservative guy seemed like the biggest cliché in the world, but not only did they make it work, they made it interesting for the rest of us.

“Hit me with your best shot,” Monica said.

Trey crossed his arms over his chest. “What is Dillion’s Rule and how can it be applied to our local government?”

Monica rolled her eyes. “Please. Like that isn’t your favorite question to ask me.”

I could feel the heat rolling off of John’s body, he was so close to me. Something stirred inside of me. As fun as it was to watch Monica and Trey argue, I wanted something different. “Want to get out of here?”

“I thought you’d never ask, Red.”

I pounded my hand on the table, rousing Trey and Monica from their debate. They snapped their heads in my direction. “Hey, me and John are going to get out of here since it seems like you two have a handle on this studying thing.”

Monica sighed. “I’m sorry. Do you want me to make him go away? I can totally do that.”

I stood up, forcing my books back in my bag and then yanked my coat on. “No, don’t worry about it. I’m sure we’ll catch up later.”

A slight smile crossed Monica’s lips. “Oh, I see what this is.” She made quotation marks with her fingers. “You two want to have a study session of your own.”

John put his arm around my waist, pulling me to his side. “Just like you two are about to do.”

“If by studying, you mean me wiping the floor with Trey in a debate, then yes, yes we are.” Monica smirked.

“On that note.” John and I backed away. “I’ll text you later, Mon.”

We took the stairs two at a time as if we both couldn’t wait to get out of there. “So where to? Coffee shop? The house?” I asked

John shook his head as he opened the front door and ushered me out. “The house is way too loud. I can’t even think there. It’s supposed to be study hours, but half the guys are shit faced.”

“Okay, so coffee?” I bit my bottom lip. God, how could this guy turn me on so much? This was why I didn’t want to study with him—because all I could think about was how bad I wanted to forget about cancer and just have him.

John put his arm back around my waist. “How about your place? More comfortable, better atmosphere, and I don’t have to listen to every freshman kid freak out because they may fail out of school.”

“Was this whole thing just an ulterior motive to get into my apartment?”

He smiled, letting out a breath of air through his nose that immediately turned into a cloud of smoke in the December air. “It wasn’t originally, but now that you mention it...”

“All you had to do was ask to come to my place instead of finding a way to run into me.”

“Okay, fine. Can I come hang out at your apartment?”

“Maybe.”

And that was how I ended up back in my apartment with John. I shouldn’t have agreed to it, because all I could think about was pouncing on him.

He sat at one end of the couch and I sat at the other with my feet on his lap. He was looking through his iPad, probably checking Facebook instead of studying.

I yawned and set down my Spanish book, rubbing my eyes and tilting my head back. If I had to look through one more Spanish conversational piece I was going to go blind.

“So, why Spanish?”

He had set the iPad on the table next to him and his full attention was on me.

“Two years of a foreign language is required for a Bachelor of Arts and my three years in high school didn’t qualify,” I said it matter-of-factly.

“Why not try a different language then? What are you going to do with Spanish?”

I shrugged. “I’ve already done all the prep work, so it just seemed like the next step.”

“But what are you going to do with it?” His fingers lazily rubbed circles around my ankles. “When you walk off that stage with your diploma, where do you see yourself going?”

No one had ever asked me that in that way. A lot of people asked what I wanted to do after college and I usually gave the same answer. Which is what I gave John. “I don’t know. Whatever job an English major will get me. Hopefully something with writing or in publishing.”

“Like fiction writing? Are you going to be the next JK Rowling?”

I tried not to snort. “I’m not that good. My old boy band fan fiction isn’t exactly New York Times Bestseller material.”

“You don’t have to be a New York Times Bestseller to be a writer. If you love something, you don’t do it just to make some list. You do it because you love it.” He lifted my ankle to his lips, placing the lightest kiss on it. I didn’t think that was a usual place to be kissed, but there was something about it that made my pulse rise. “Do you love writing?”

Did I love writing? Yes and No. I loved letting my fantasies and all the characters swimming in my head fall into words that I wrote on my paper. What I hated was the way it would get ripped to shreds when it was read in one of my English classes or the thought of countless rejections from publishers so that I would end up writing for some crappy local blog just to pay the bills. I didn’t want my life to be focused around my work or making money, but when I had a mom that was living paycheck to paycheck, I thought about it a lot.

“Sometimes I do.”

“If you don’t love something, then don’t do it. If it’s not in your heart, don’t follow it.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Do you only do things that you love?”

His eyes locked on mine like there was no one in the world but me. Not just the room, but the world. It made every hair on my body stand on end and I was acutely aware that he was touching me. It was one of the best sensations. “I’m the bull, Red. I try to do what I think is best, but there is always that person waving the red flag in my face and trying to get me to turn the other way.”

“And you think the bull doesn’t have another choice? That he couldn’t just ignore it?”

He put my foot down and leaned in closer, crawling on the couch until he was hovering over me. “Sometimes people are just misunderstood. People and animals. We can’t just assume they are thinking one thing and can avoid temptation. It’s hard as hell to avoid that red flag when it’s waving in your face.”

“Are we talking about the bull, or you, or writing now? Because I’m really confused.”

He grinned, his teeth flashing a brilliant white only a few inches from my face. “It’s always been you and me, Red. Even before we were us. You’ve always had the control in this relationship. Some things may distract us, but I’ll always come back to you.”

I swallowed hard. He always knew just what to say and it still left me speechless. When I first met the muscled guy I didn’t think much of him, but in just a few short months he’d become my everything. I’d fallen in love with the guy behind the amazing smile and killer abs and it scared the hell out of me. I’d thought I loved Robby, but it wasn’t like this. This was something way more powerful. This was something that I felt deep in my core and I was afraid what would happen if he didn’t feel it too.

“Sorry to get all cheesy on you. I just had to get that out.”

I shook my head and licked my lips. “No. I like it. You’re way better at this talking thing than I am.”

“We don’t need to talk, if that’s not what you want to do.” His lips were at my neck, the stubble from his cheeks tickling me.

I closed my eyes, savoring the feel of his skin against mine. I wanted to let go and say those three little words to him. He could babble on with the most poetic of verses without even trying, and I, an aspiring writer, could barely string a sentence together in his presence. Instead I just moaned when he nipped at my earlobe.

“What do you want, Red?” he whispered.

“I don’t want anything right now but your lips on mine.”

And he obliged. His lips quickly finding mine and his tongue diving behind them. I pulled him closer, wrapping my arms around his neck and with his warm body pressed against mine. His hands went from running through my hair, down my face, and finally resting at my sides where his fingers found the space that my shirt didn’t meet my jeans. He skimmed the bare skin, sending goose bumps wherever his fingers touched.

When his lips dropped to my neck, I gasped and could feel him smiling between kisses. “How’s this for studying?”

“I’m not taking anatomy.” I breathed.

“Then say it in Spanish. That counts as studying, mi amiga.” His tongue ran along my jawline.

“Amiga means friend. You’re probably looking for something more like novia or amor.” I was barely able to get the words out, between his nibbling and kisses.

“God your brain is sexy. Keep talking.”

That was something I’d never heard, especially not in the middle of a make out session. But who was I to judge? I couldn’t even think of what to say, so I just didn’t think and started saying what I was feeling, but in Spanish. With each word I spoke his fingers dug into my sides, his breath ragged against my neck. It may not have technically been studying, but if I was using the language then it had to count for something. And it was the hottest study session I’d ever had.

“You are so unbelievably sexy,” John growled against my neck.

With his breath on my neck and his hands roaming around me, my body built up to the brink and then I cried out as his lips ran across my jaw. Did I seriously get off without him really touching me? Maybe he didn’t notice.

“I love it when you come for me,” he whispered in my ear.

Okay, so he did hear it. There was no way I could hide it. I had to think of something to say and fast. “Will you let me do the same for you?”

He lifted his head up, his eyes meeting mine. “Are you trying to suggest something, Red? Because I’m not expecting anything from you.”

“I want to.” I moved my hand down to the waistband of his jeans and dipped my fingers beneath it.

He inhaled a sharp breath through his teeth and I felt his hard ridges against my fingertips. I should have really thought about this before I put my hands there. Feeling through his jeans was one thing, but having it in my hands was another story. I didn’t have much experience in the dick department, but I’d have to say his was quite large and intimidating.

“Don’t start something if you don’t intend to finish,” he whispered

I quickly unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans. It stared back at me like it was taunting me. But I couldn’t deny that the guy was beautiful everywhere. Even down to his perfectly manscaped regions. Now hopefully I could actually get it in my mouth. I should of thought about how big he would be before I started. I placed my hands on the curves of his hips before I looked up at him, licking my lips. “Just lie back and think of Espana.”