Unnatural Acts

34

Herbie awoke the following morning, still feeling fuzzy. He’d had only about four hours of sleep, but that would be enough. He called the rehab farm in Connecticut and made an appointment to see Dink, then he had a long conversation with the director of the farm. He showered, shaved, had a good breakfast, then transferred his security tape to his iPad and put it into his briefcase, along with a copy of Carson Cullers’s signed statement. He inserted a tiny recorder into the breast pocket of his tweed jacket, then he called Cookie and told her to clear his morning, that he had to see a client, which was true. He got out the Maybach and drove up to New Haven, thinking that, maybe, he should be driving something less ostentatious.

He drove through the gates of the farm and presented himself at the reception desk, then waited in a comfortable lounge that reminded him of a hotel he had once stayed in.

Dink appeared a few minutes later, dressed in khakis and a polo shirt, clean-shaven and finely barbered. “Hello, Herb,” he said cheerfully, offering his hand. “I’m sorry to keep you waiting. I had to wrap up a group therapy session. I’m glad you could come to see me.”

“Oh, I was in the neighborhood,” Herbie replied, shaking the hand. “Have a seat, Dink. We need to talk.”

Dink sat down, crossed his legs, and smiled broadly. “I want to thank you personally for getting me into this place. It has really changed my life, and they tell me I’ll be ready for release in a week or two.”

“You’re entirely welcome, Dink. But what I’m about to tell you is going to change your life again-and again for the better.”

“Well, that sounds great, Herb.”

“Of course, there’s an alternative scenario, but we’ll get to that later. Right now you should know that you’re not getting out of here in a couple of weeks. In fact, I think you’re probably going to be here for the remainder of this year and maybe for the year after, too.”

Dink’s face took on a scowl.

“What are you talking about?”

Herbie took the small recorder from his pocket. “I want you to listen to what Carson Cullers had to say last night.” He switched it on. “She said it to the police, and then she put it in writing.” As Carson began to speak, Herbie switched on his iPad, which began to play his security tape.

Dink listened and watched. “This is bullshit, Herb,” he said.

“Shut up and listen,” Herbie said. When the two tapes had played, he switched on the recorder and put it back into his pocket. “Now, what you’ve just seen and heard is enough to get you five to seven years at a very uncomfortable state institution, a place not nearly as nice as this one.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Dink said. “Carson is making this up. She’s crazy, you know-she has spells where she doesn’t know who or where she is.”

“Those probably come during sessions with the drugs you supply her,” Herbie said.

“And it’s her word against mine. You have no evidence tying me to this.”

“Your old roommate, Parker Mosely, is at this moment having a very long conversation with an NYPD detective lieutenant. I’ll have the recordings of that session for you in a day or two. And your stash of drugs has been located, so we can add another ten years to your sentence for that. You’re going to be well into your middle years before you see the light of day, Dink.”

“I want a lawyer,” Dink said sullenly.

“I’m the only lawyer you’re going to get, Dink. Have you forgotten that you signed a document making me your only legal representative for the foreseeable future? You also made me your legal guardian, upon your self-admission to this facility. Add while you are a patient here, you are, ipso facto, incompetent to change those agreements.”

“My old man won’t let you get away with this,” Dink said. He was looking very worried now.

“Your father has already had a long conversation with my associate, who is his good friend, and he has wholeheartedly approved of everything I’m telling you.”

“And if I don’t do what you want me to?”

“Oh, yes, the alternative scenario. In that case this facility will declare you competent, and you will be arrested and tried for your crimes. Carson and Parker will testify in court that you supplied her, through Parker, with drugs, then instructed her to entrap your attorney into a rape charge. You will be convicted and, when all charges are taken into account, sentenced to a term of fifteen to twenty years in a hard-core, non-country-club prison. Oh, and your father will wash his hands of you and disinherit you, as well. When you are finally released you will have to rely on the criminal and sexual skills you learned in prison to support yourself. Are you beginning to get the picture, Dink?”

“Now look, Herb,” Dink said, tears appearing in his eyes, “I want to apologize for this whole thing. It was just a big practical joke that went wrong, and I’ll do whatever I possibly can to make it up to you, really I will.”

“Well, Dink, that’s a great start on the new attitude you’re going to have to adopt if you want to be a free man before you’re forty.”

“I’ll do whatever you tell me, Herb. Trust me, I will.”

“Trust you?” Herbie laughed at that one. “You’re a junkie and a drug dealer, two of the most untrustworthy beings on the planet. You’ve just put the girl you supposedly love and your best friend, perhaps your only friend, in jeopardy of long prison sentences, and you’ve gravely endangered your relationship with the father who loves you and, not incidentally, with his very considerable fortune, and for what? You should start asking yourself that today.”

“I’ll do whatever you say, Herb,” Dink said, and he sounded truly contrite.

“You can start by stopping trying to use the people in this place who want to help you. The general consensus among them, you might like to know, is that you are a liar, a narcissist, a con man, and a sociopath who is a danger to himself and to others. You see, they are accustomed to being lied to by people like you, and they know how to deal with you.

“By the way, while we’ve been having this conversation, the staff have taken apart your very comfortable quarters and removed all of your personal possessions and confiscated them. For the foreseeable future you’ll be wearing the orange hospital gown that you already know identifies the least trustworthy patients of this facility, and you are being moved to a room that is very much like the prison cell you will be occupying, if you should give your father or me the slightest difficulty. He and I are the only people authorized to contact you, and you may not contact anyone, especially Carson and Parker. Have you grasped your situation yet?”

Dink looked out of breath. “Yes,” he said. “I’ll be good.” He sounded like a small child who had been chastened.

“Ah, here come your escorts to your new quarters,” Herbie said. “They’ll give you your new gown after they’ve strip-searched you and given you today’s medications.”

Herbie got up to leave as the two large men in white approached. “Enjoy your stay on the farm, Dink. I’ll be in touch from time to time, when I feel like it.”

The two men took Dink’s arms and marched him away.

Herbie went back to the Maybach and turned it toward the city. He thought he might do a little car shopping on the way home.