Unnatural Acts

42

Herbie came out of a class on defense strategy and ran, head-on, into Mike Freeman.

“Hi there, Mike. I didn’t know you were coming up.”

“I’m giving some prospective clients a tour. Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Very much.”

“Well, cut your next class and come with me,” Mike said, “and you’ll learn a lot more. I’m giving these folks an overview of what we do.”

Herbie followed Mike and his party of half a dozen into a conference room, where they all sat down and Mike switched on a projector. “Gentlemen, this young man in camouflage is Herb Fisher, the corporate counsel for our new division, Strategic Defense.” Everybody waved, and Herbie waved back.

“Now, I’m going to give you an overview of our operations as a company, so you can see the breadth and depth of what we offer.” He put a chart on the screen. “As you can see, we have a number of subsidiaries: vehicle armoring, communication electronics, security and surveillance systems, computer security and software, and our latest subsidiary, Strategic Defense, which is devoted to the training of security personnel. As you have seen around our new site, we offer a number of kinds of training: personal defense, client defense, firearms, high-performance driving, client relations, emergency medical treatment, and penetration and rescue-more about which later.

“All of you use some of these services now, albeit with our competitors, but I want to show you what full-service security looks like.” He switched to a schematic of an office building. “Let’s say you’re planning a new company headquarters or a large branch, and you’re constructing your own building. Our services begin at the design stage. Our architects help yours lay out your floor space in such a way as to make it difficult to penetrate and easy to defend. Our electrical engineers help design a wiring loom for the building that incorporates wiring for the security system and an abundance of high-definition color cameras and recording systems. We place check-in and check-out areas in the street lobby and on each floor, and each of these desks is able to communicate instantly with your security personnel.

“Those personnel would be trained by us, of course, and we would train your employees to work seamlessly with them to protect your premises, your personnel, and your intellectual property. We divide your parking garage into public and corporate areas and screen every vehicle and driver entering either area.

“Executive personnel would be able to arrive and depart from a secure area, since walking from a car to a building is a vulnerable time. The local police would be invited to cooperate with your on-site security personnel. You’ll get along better with them in an emergency if they know your people and their practices ahead of an emergency.

“By the time your new offices open we would have brought your security officers to this facility and trained them in a standardized program, so that if they are transferred from one office to another anywhere in the world, their training and operation will be consistent.

“For your highest-level personnel, we will design protective transportation for their use, ranging from a lightly armored SUV to a vehicle very nearly presidential in its strength, and your drivers will be trained in the appropriate vehicles. We will also offer security planning and equipment for top management residences and vacation homes.

“Our flight services division will consult with your people on the selection and purchase of the best aircraft for your needs, whether it be short-hop visits to branches and plants, or ocean-spanning flights to international venues. We can build a hangar for you and establish your corporate flight department for the piloting and maintenance of your aircraft and to oversee the training, both initial and recurrent, for your pilots and airframe, engine, and avionics technicians.

“Our international department can smooth the way for important executives who are relocating, helping them to find suitable, secure housing and schools, as well as furnishing personal protection for the whole family.

“In locations where kidnapping is practiced by local criminals or terrorist groups, we can send in specialists in penetration and recovery, and when that is not possible, we send personnel to negotiate the freedom of personnel being held. Our insurance associate, Steele, offers insurance packages for personnel sent abroad, which can include kidnapping insurance, making large sums immediately available for negotiation and recovery.

“We are pleased to offer services that none of us has even thought of yet-invented or improvised, as the situation calls for. All our personnel are thoroughly trained for the environment in which they work, at home or abroad. We draw people from the armed services, particularly Special Forces and Navy SEAL veterans, as well as from the FBI, the treasury department, the CIA and NSA, and from police departments in many countries. They are trained to always operate legally in any setting, especially with regard to local weapons laws.

“Finally, when we have designed a top-to-bottom security plan for your company, we will make a comprehensive presentation to your board of directors, demonstrating the cost-effectiveness of each part of our plan.”

Mike then took questions for nearly an hour, then invited the group to lunch in the company mess. Herbie excused himself to take a phone call on his cell.

“Hello?”

“Hi, it’s Cookie.”

“What’s up?”

“You had a call from Dink Brennan a few minutes ago.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not. He asked for an appointment to come and see you when you get back.”

Herbie thought about that for a moment. “Make the appointment,” he said, “and make it early.”

“All right. When are you coming back?”

“I’ll be there Monday morning, first thing.”

“Then that’s when I’ll make the appointment for Dink.”

“Good. Let’s see if he can get up that early. Anything else?”

“I think I’m going to need some help around here,” she said.

“I’ve been thinking about that,” Herbie said. “I don’t want you spread too thin.”

“There’s a woman I know who works here in Accounting that I think would be very good for the things we do. Her name is RoseAnn Faber.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Herbie said. “See ya.” He hung up and called Bill Eggers.

“Having fun at camp, Herbert?”

“I’m having a lot more than fun, Bill. I just watched Mike Freeman give a presentation to prospective clients that taught me more about Strategic Services than I thought I’d ever know. I think you would enjoy watching, next time he gives it.”

“I’ll figure that out,” Eggers said. “What’s up?”

“I need another secretary,” Herbie said. “Cookie is beginning to drown in the work.”

“That’s not an unreasonable request, given the work you’ve created for yourself. I’ll speak to Personnel.”

“Speak to Accounting, instead,” Herbie said. “There’s a woman working in that department named RoseAnn Faber. Cookie knows her and thinks she’d be good in the job. Then Accounting can speak to Personnel about replacing her.”

“I’ll look into it,” Eggers said. “Are you ever coming back to work here?”

“I never stopped, but I’ll be in my actual office Monday morning.”

“See you then.” Eggers hung up, and Herbie went to lunch.